Intellective Computer Quotes

Computer hacking was like a chemical bond holding us all together. ~ Rachel Zhang

Man is still the most extraordinary computer of all. ~ John F. Kennedy

If Java had true garbage collection, most programs would delete themselves upon execution. ~ Robert Sewell

All problems in Computer Science can be solved by another level of indirection. ~ Butler Lampson

All problems in computer graphics can be solved with a matrix inversion. ~ Jim Blinn

The question of whether computers can think is like the question of whether submarines can swim. ~ Edsger Dijkstra

Any fool can use a computer. Many do. ~ Ted Nelson

Remember, when you connect with another computer, you're connecting to every computer that computer has connected to. ~ Dennis Miller

Most papers in computer science describe how their author learned what someone else already knew. ~ Peter Landin

The unavoidable price of reliability is simplicity. ~ Tony Hoare

12 Hours on the computer... sounds like I am vip... few people stay on computer so long or not big %. ~ Deyth Banger

I don't need to waste my time with a computer just because I am a computer scientist. ~ Edsger Dijkstra

I am not the only person who uses his computer mainly for the purpose of diddling with his computer. ~ Dave Barry

In view of all the deadly computer viruses that have been spreading lately, Weekend Update would like to remind you: when you link up to another computer, you're linking up to every computer that that computer has ever linked up to. ~ Dennis Miller

I like computers. It's the first time that I am endorsing a computer brand. I am very computer savvy, so this is certainly up my ally. ~ Bill Vaughan

Computer Science is embarrassed by the computer. ~ Alan Perlis

That's the thing about people who think they hate computers. What they really hate is lousy programmers. ~ Larry Niven

I use a computer. I don't know if that qualifies me as a techie, but I'm pretty good on the computer. ~ Leonard Nimoy

The universe is a quantum computer. Since you can simulate any set of particle interactions with a quantum computer made of the same number of particles, then there's no practical difference between the universe and a quantum computer simulating the universe. ~ David Walton

I appreciate the sentiment that I am a popular woman in computer gaming circles; but I prefer being thought of as a computer game designer rather than a woman computer game designer. I don't put myself into gender mode when designing a game. ~ Roberta Williams

I don't even know which end of a computer one is supposed to gaze into. I've never used a computer. ~ P. J. O'Rourke

It's not computer literacy that we should be working on, but sort of human-literacy. Computers have to become human-literate. ~ Nicholas Negroponte

Taxpayers have spent more than $200 billion in the last decade on computer systems that are antiquated, incompatible, and not doing the job. ~ William Cohen

Computer science is fascinating. As you study computer science, you will find that you develop your mind. It is literally like doing Buddhist exercises all day long. ~ Frederick Lenz

I proudly tell people, 'I have no computer,' so as not to be ashamed of having no computer. ~ Tom Stoppard

Computer dating? It's terrific if you're a computer! ~ Rita Mae Brown

Currently computer graphics are used a great deal, but it can be excessive. ~ Hayao Miyazaki

Never hesitate to ask a lesser person. ~ Confucius

Similarly, computer literacy courses tend to produce computer people who know a lot about computers or a piece of software but they don't help people become fluent with the machine. ~ Seymour Papert

When a professor insists computer science is X but not Y, have compassion for his graduate students. ~ Alan Perlis

Before a kid learns how to use a computer that can solve mathematical problems, he or she should know how to do arithmetic without a computer. ~ Andy Rooney

All sorts of computer errors are now turning up. You'd be surprised to know the number of doctors who claim they are treating pregnant men. ~ Isaac Asimov

Celebrities, make it harder for hackers to get nude pics of you from your computer by not putting nude pics of yourself on the computer. ~ Ricky Gervais

Computer languages of the future will be more concerned with goals and less with procedures specified by the programmer. ~ Marvin Minsky

They've finally comes up with the perfect office computer. If it makes a mistake, it blames another computer. ~ Milton Berle

This week Apple stores are holding free computer programming classes for children. Or as that's called in China, a job fair. ~ Conan O'Brien

What's your personal computer, anyways? Your personal computer should be something that's always on your person. ~ Bill Joy

3D is like a computer. Every six months that computer that was state of the art is now obsolete. ~ Carl Mazzocone

The modern computer hovers between the obsolescent and the nonexistent. ~ Sydney Brenner

I don't even go on the computer. Don't anybody around me get on the computer. ~ Gorilla Zoe

No one messes around with a nerd's computer and escapes unscathed. ~ E.A. Bucchianeri

An activity originally intended to be performed by low-status, clerical – and more often than not, female – computer programming was gradually and deliberately transformed into a high-status, scientific, and masculine discipline. ~ Nathan L. Ensmenger

The main motivations were to try to leverage Google's expertise with large computer systems and to try to give something back to science ~ Susan Wojcicki

Finding a technical cofounder would have been difficult for me. I was an English major and didn't know any computer programmers. ~ Jessica Livingston

As a person with terrible handwriting, I love the computer. I've waited all my life for the computer. ~ Janet Fitch

I have long been alarmed by people's sheeplike acceptance of the term 'computer technology' - it sounds so objective and inexorable - when most computer technology is really a bunch of ideas turned into conventions and packages. ~ Ted Nelson

I only buy a computer when it's two years old, after the glitches have been worked out. ~ Felix Dennis

An artist creates songs and timeless moments that are reflections that impact culture, and you can do that in any way - with guitars, ukelele, a computer. So, that will never die. It's always the artist behind the computer, not the computer. ~ Skrillex

We've created life in our own image. ~ Stephen Hawking

One good thing about my computer: it never asks why. ~ Ashleigh Brilliant

Theoretical Computer Science is just as useless as everything we mathematicians do. ~ Jennifer Tour Chayes

Allowing the computer to do one thing is only boring if you don't use the time that the computer saves you to do something else. ~ Richie Hawtin

Strapping a computer display to your face is not the answer. ~ John Gruber

Nobody reads the disclosures that roll down your computer screen. You click 'I agree' but you don't know what you're agreeing to. ~ Nassim Nicholas Taleb

I don't even have my own computer. ~ Daley Thompson

Computer Science is no more about computers than astronomy is about telescopes ~ Edsger W. Dijkstra

Why am I arguing with a computer? ~ Edge

The brain processes information using 100,000 times less energy than we do right now with this computer technology that we have. ~ Kwabena Boahen

Every new computer program is basically doing some task that a person used to do. But the computer usually does it faster, more accurately, for less money, and without any health insurance costs. ~ Douglas Rushkoff

COMPUTER: HELLO, CECIL. HOW ARE YOU?
CECIL: Computer! I am...I am doing well. How are you?
COMPUTER: BETTER. CECIL, DO YOU LOVE COMPUTER?
CECIL: I admit, I had not given it much though. I like computers generally. They calculate and power off and on. I suppose, given time and perhaps some gifts, I could learn to... [shifting noises] hey! ~ Joseph Fink

There's a good part of Computer Science that's like magic. Unfortunately there's a bad part of Computer Science that's like religion. ~ Hal Abelson

In the end, it all comes down to 0 and 1 ~ Vineet Goel

It's hardware that makes a machine fast. It's software that makes a fast machine slow. ~ Craig Bruce

I don't know why a computer game can't be an art form just as a puppet show or an opera is. I'm still interested in computer games as something I would like to work on someday. ~ Fred Saberhagen

The computer offers another kind of creativity. You cannot ignore the creativity that computer technology can bring. But you need to be able to move between those two different worlds. ~ Tadao Ando

Computer science really involves the same mindset, particularly artificial intelligence. ~ Frederick Lenz

It's funny, because I'm so associated with digital art and computer art, and yet I spend so little time in front of the computer. ~ Keith Fullerton Whitman

I recommend, for many people, the study of computer science. Our natural resource in America is the mind. The mindset in computer science is very similar to the mindset in Zen. ~ Frederick Lenz

It's amazing to me that owning your own computer was considered impossible. ~ Randy Wigginton

The computer was born to solve problems that did not exist before. ~ Bill Gates

I can write faster on a typewriter than you can on a computer. I do 120 words a minute, and you can't do that on a computer. ~ Ray Bradbury

The first law of computer science: Every problem is solved by yet another indirection. ~ Bjarne Stroustrup

Thanks to my computer, I have now achieved a much higher state of disorganization. ~ Ashleigh Brilliant

Just putting a computer in front of a student doesn't make education better. ~ Joel Klein

Computer programs are the most complex things that humans make. ~ Douglas Crockford

Anyone who spends their life on a computer is pretty unusual. ~ Bill Gates

My kid is a product of the fast computer lifestyle. ~ Tim Burton

The arrival of the Computer Revolution and the founding of the Computer Age has been announced many times. But if the triumph of a revolution is to be measured in terms of the profundity of the social revisions it entrained, then there has been no computer revolution. And however the present age is to be characterized, the computer is not eponymic of it. ~ Joseph Weizenbaum

My computer tells me that in twenty-five years there will be no more computers. ~ Edward Abbey

The computer is down. I hope it's something serious. ~ Stanton Delaplane

I remember that mathematicians were telling me in the 1960s that they would recognize computer science as a mature discipline when it had 1,000 deep algorithms. I think we've probably reached 500. ~ Donald Knuth

If true computer music were ever written, it would only be listened to by other computers. ~ Michael Crichton

Until Systers came into existence, the notion of a global 'community of women in computer science' did not exist. ~ Anita Borg

The difference between us and a computer is that, the computer is blindingly stupid, but it is capable of being stupid many, many million times a second. ~ Douglas Adams

You can't *discover* that the brain is a digital computer. You can only *interpret* the brain as a digital computer. ~ John Searle

There are 2 hard problems in computer science: cache invalidation, naming things, and off-by-1 errors. ~ Leon Bambrick

No one will need more than 637Kb of memory for a personal computer ~ Bill Gates

Computer science increasingly relies on its private corporate patrons who apply their own closed systems of peer review and criticism, with occasional results thrown over the wall. The closed walls of Redmond or Mountain View enable old-fashioned patronage of nature's secrets. The objectivity and scientific status of computer science is a chimera: we cannot stand on the shoulders of giants in computer science, for they simply refuse to let us. ~ Samir Chopra

OK, so the computer has understood, but what about me ? ~ Eugene Wigner

My CPU is a neural net processor; a learning computer. ~ Arnold Schwarzenegger

You can't write poetry on the computer. ~ Quentin Tarantino

If you had to give a name to the whole apparatus, what would you call it?" "Hmmm," Waterhouse says. "Well, its basic job is to perform mathematical calculations - like a computer." Comstock snorts. "A computer is a human being." "Well . . . this machine uses binary digits to do its computing. I suppose you could call it a digital computer." Comstock writes it out in block letters on his legal pad: DIGITAL COMPUTER. ~ Neal Stephenson

You can either have software quality or you can have pointer arithmetic, but you cannot have both at the same time. ~ Bertrand Meyer

The only thing I do on a computer is play Texas Hold 'Em, really. Obviously my cell phone is a computer. My car is a computer. I'm on computers every day without actively seeking them out. ~ John Hawkes

Using the analogy of the human mind as a computer, gossip can be compared to a computer virus. A computer virus is a piece of computer language written in the same language all the other codes are written in, but with a harmful intent. This code is inserted into the program of your computer when you least expect it and most of the time without your awareness. After this code has been introduced, your computer doesn't work quite right, or it doesn't function at all because the codes get so mixed up with so many conflicting messages that it stops producing good results. ~ Miguel Ruiz

Computers had their origin in military cryptography - in a sense, every computer game represents the commandeering of a military code-breaking apparatus for purposes of human expression. ~ Austin Grossman

I knew, always, what I wanted to be. Even before I had my first computer, I wanted to be a computer scientist. ~ Gary William Flake

You can create art and beauty with a computer. ~ Steven Levy

Computer scientists stand on each other's feet. ~ Richard Hamming

Controlling complexity is the essence of computer programming. ~ Brian Kernighan