Cute Funny Quotes

Patch leaned back against the booth and arched his eyebrows at me. The gesture said it all: Pay up.

"You got lucky," I said.

"I'm about to get lucky. ~ Becca Fitzpatrick

Hey," she whispered to Malachi. "When are Irin considered adults?"

He was following what looked to be a quiet argument between Sari and Mala. "Full adults? Around sixty to seventy-five years. When we're finished with our training. Why?"

She flushed. Wow.

"So, you're quite the cradle robber, aren't you?"

Malachi turned to her abruptly. "What? No, I'm not."

"I'm not even thirty. That's like... a teenager to you guys."

She could see the flush crawl up his neck, even behind the beard. "You're human. You mature differently."

"But I'm not really human."

His shoulders were stiff and his posture screamed his discomfort. It was really a shame Ava found teasing him to be so amusing.

"I mean, what would your mom say if she found out you were mated-and I mean well and thoroughly mated- to what she would basically consider a kid?"

He wiped a hand over his forehead. "Heaven above, please stop talking."

"So are we going to stop fooling around now?"

He groaned. "Ava."

"I'm just yanking your chain."

"You're going to have to speak up, because the mental lecture my mother's memory is giving me right now is rather loud. ~ Elizabeth Hunter

I mean, my age is just a number. So what if you were born in the era when they still used rotary phones and cassette tapes? I think it's cute. ~ T.S. Krupa

Daemon pressed his forehead against mine. Oh, I still want to strangle you. But I'm insane. You're crazy. Maybe that's why. We just make crazy together. ~ Jennifer L. Armentrout

Jehovah's Witness? Don't sweat it. I'm going to hell, already booked my ticket. Bright side? I'm pagan. Your hell is my heaven ... if for no other reason than you won't be there. ~ Dennis Sharpe

A breath? she asked. She didn't want to kiss just any wooden man. He looked nice enough, but he might not be like his looks. A kiss seemed very forward. He might remember it, and make assumptions. ~ Garth Nix

I won't say that you're pretty because that dog already did. And I won't say you're funny because you have had me laughing since I met you. ~ Melissa Landers

Wow," she said. "Do you realise how wonderful you sound?"
"Yes, I do," he said with a firm nod. "And I think I'm underappreciated. ~ Robyn Carr

As my laughter faded, he shot me an amused glance. "You should laugh more often. It's far less nauseating than your speaking voice."
"That may be the nicest thing you've ever said to me."
"Don't let it go to your head. ~ Cecily White

Julian smiled back, his full lips pulled back over white teeth as he rolled the blanket back a little bit. "Is he really a heart breaker?"
"I'm the breakiest of heart breakers," Leo interjected, his tone deadpan as he dumped a handful of greens into the pot on the stove.
Julian wrinkled his nose. "That's not even a word," He complained and fell into a sulky silence from his place on the bed. ~ Hazel Blackthorn

I heard Dominic practice Bronagh's breathing tactics, and I wondered if I'd be taking care of him in the delivery ward as well as her.
"I feel like I'm about to pass out."
Yep, I'm definitely going to be looking after him.
"Keep breathing, you'll be fine," I assured him. "Where's me sister?"
"Why're you telling Dominic to breathe?'
Ryder murmured.
"He's freakin' out," I whispered in response making him snicker. ~ L.A. Casey

Its Batteries! I just know it! ~ Alison

So you're her brother?" says Lynn. "I guess we know who got the good genes."
I laugh at the expression on Caleb's face, his mouth drawn into a slight pucker and his eyes wide. ~ Veronica Roth

Oh don't be such a fuss pot," said the fairy, "or I'll call you Fussy Pants, instead of Silly Pants! ~ Julie B. Campbell

Didn't expect to see you here," Jordan said.
My eyes cut to Rachel, and I smiled sweetly. "Obviously. Hey, Rachel. Good to see you again."
Hopefully, Jordan would know what I really meant, which was I'd cut a bitch if I could. ~ S.E. Harmon

Elizabeth."
I feel my smile on my face as I understand what she is doing. Though it's a strange one, she has a name-sound just like I do, and she's telling me what it is. I try to make the same sounds.
"Ehh..beh." I frown. Why is her name-sound so difficult and so long?
She frowns right back at me and says it again. "Elizabeth."
"Beh-tah-babaa."
She sighs and her forehead wrinkles.
"Elizabeth. Eeee-lizzzz-ahh-beth."
"Laahh...baaay."
She taps her chest again.
"Beth!"
The sound is shorter but still very odd.
"Beh-bet."
"Beth," she repeats.
I've had enough. I reach out and touch her should.
"Beh."
"Beth."
I tap her a little harder and growl.
"Beh", I repeat. I tap her again. "BEH!"
Her eyes widen a bit, and she inhales sharply. A moment later, her shoulders drop and she sighs.
"Beh," she says quietly. ~ Shay Savage

Your big scary husband is crying. ~ Robyn Carr

He did not go much further, but sat down on the cold floor and gave himself up to complete miserableness, for a long while. He thought of himself frying bacon and eggs in his own kitchen at home - for he could feel inside that it was high time for some meal or other; but that only made him miserabler. ~ J.R.R. Tolkien

I love the sound of it," Trina whispers, as if speaking too loudly might interrupt the drumming patter of the rain outside. "It makes me want to sleep. Snuggle my head right up in your armpit and snore for three days."
"My armpit?" Mark repeats. "Good thing we all showered up in the storm this morning. My pits smell like roses. Go ahead and get comfy. ~ James Dashner

I gave a relenting sigh. "Fine! I'll throw on some clothes. Turn around. I'm in my pj's." Pj's that consisted of nothing but a tank top and boy shorts
an image I didn't want to sear into Scott's mind.
Scott smiled. "I'm a guy. That's like asking a kid not to glance at the candy counter." Ugh. The dimple in his cheek deepened. And it was not in any way cute ... ~ Becca Fitzpatrick

Alright, good night," he said, his words a little slurred. "But before I pass out, I want you to know that you're the hottest biscuit this side of the gravy boat. ~ Erin McCarthy

My ideal prom date would have to be cute, funny, sweet, nice. ~ Kendall Jenner

Oh you rebel you! ~ Mallory Hopkins

You're back," Sam said, as if he couldn't quite believe it.
She lifted her chin, stuffing her hands in her pockets. "Obviously."
He tilted his head slightly to the side. "How was the desert?"
There wasn't a scratch on him. Of course, her face had healed too but ... "Hot," she said. Sam let out a breathy chuckle. ~ Sarah J. Maas

No Tyson, the guy in the story did not attract the attention of a moose. Tyson is sad now. ~ Rick Riordan

I bet the very first piñata was surprised. "Oh, hey a party! Cool! What's the occa - HEY, WHAT THE HELL, KID? ~ Jessica Park

Sam came around the side of the car and stopped dead when he saw me. "Oh my God, what is THAT?" I used my thumb and middle finger to flick the multicolored pom-pom on top of my head. "In my language, we call it a HAT. It keeps my ears warm." "Oh my God," Sam said again, and closed the distance between us. He cupped my face in his hands and studied me. "It's horribly cute." He kissed me, looked at the hat, and then he kissed me again. I vowed never to lose the pom-pom hat. ~ Maggie Stiefvater

Since Sienna was in an unusually cooperative mood, the session went well. He was returning from it midmorning - after a short detour - when a small naked body barreled into him in one of the main corridors. Steadying the boy with Tk, he looked down. The child lifted a finger to his lips. "Shh. I'm hiding." With that, he went behind Judd and scrambled into a small alcove. "Quickly!
Not sure why he obeyed the order, Judd backed up to stand in front of the alcove, arms crossed.

A flustered Lara came running around the corner a few seconds later. "Have you seen Ben? Four-year-old. Naked as a jaybird?"

"How tall is he?" Judd asked in his most overbearing Psy manner.

Lara stared. "He's four. How tall do you think he is? Have you seen him or not?"

"Let me think...did you say he was naked?"

"He was about to be bathed. Slippery little monkey."

A giggle from behind Judd.

Lara's eyes widened and then her lips twitched. "So you haven't seen him?"

"Without a proper description, I can't be sure."

The healer was obviously trying not to laugh. "You shouldn't encourage him - he's incorrigible as it is."

Judd felt childish hands on his left calf and then Ben poked his head out. "I'm incorwigeable, did ya hear?"

Judd nodded. "I do believe you've been found. Why don't you go have your bath?"

"Come on, munchkin." Lara held out a hand.

Surprisingly st ~ Nalini Singh

I feel a strange sensation brewing inside of me. It tickles my throat and forces my lips into a grin. Before I can stifle it, I giggle. And then I laugh. ~ Kristen Simmons

Alec furrowed his brow. "So you're scrapbooking?" Magnus made a face. "To the lay observer, what I'm doing might look similar, yes. ~ Cassandra Clare

This is my depressed stance. When you're depressed, it makes a lot of difference how you stand. The worst thing you can do is straighten up and hold your head high because then you'll start to feel better. If you're going to get any joy out of being depressed, you've got to stand like this. ~ Charles M. Schulz

Marriage is an adventure, like going to war. ~ Gilbert K. Chesterton

I am a vicious and unrepentant killer who should be locked up. With him, my idiot boyfriend. ~ Kylie Scott

He could do with some lunch. Especially since that bastard Sloane gave his Cheesy Doodles away. What kind of guy does that? A bastard, that's who. Did he not respect the male code of honor - thou shalt not steal another dude's snacks?
--Dex ~ Charlie Cochet

Rumo!" said Rumo.
"That's right!" Smyke exclaimed. "You Rumo, me Smyke."
"You Rumo, me Smyke." Rumo repeated eagerly.
"No, no." Smyke chuckled. ~ Walter Moers

Seriously, why was it tradition to stand when the bride came in? It blocked her from seeing her groom, who was the only reason she was there in the first place. ~ K.R. Grace

I guess we're oil and water. (Phoebe)
I'd say we're more like gasoline and a blowtorch. (Dan) ~ Susan Elizabeth Phillips

Tell me, Lothaire, I want to know. Convince me why I should love you."
"Because any other female would! ~ Kresley Cole

We didn't kiss," I said. Jules cocked an eyebrow. "We brushed lips. ~ Leila Howland

We're adults. I might be a little more of an adult if you're counting years but I bet I have a lower IQ, so that puts us pretty much even. ~ Robyn Carr

What's happening here?" This last bit was hissed to Ronan and Noah.
"Noah took a personal day."
"I lost..." Noah struggled for words. "There wasn't air. It went away. The - the line!"
"The ley line?" Gansey asked.
Noah nodded once, a sloppy thing that was sort of a shrug at the same time. "There was nothing ... left for me." Releasing Ronan, he shook out his hands.
"You're welcome, man," Ronan snarled. He still couldn't feel his toes.
"Thanks. I didn't mean to ... you were there. Oh, the glitter."
"Yes," Ronan replied crossly. "The glitter. ~ Maggie Stiefvater

Hey,' he said, touching my waist. 'Hey. It's okay.' I nodded and wiped my face with the back of my hand. 'He sucks.' I nodded again. 'I'll write you an epilogue,' Gus said. That made me cry harder. 'I will,' he said. 'I will. Better than any sh*t that drunk could write. His brain is Swiss cheese. He doesn't even remember writing the book. I can write ten times the story that guy can. There will be blood and guts and sacrifice. An Imperial Affliction meets The Prince of Dawn. You'll love it.' I kept nodding, faking a smile, and then he hugged me, his strong arms pulling me into his muscular chest, and I sogged up his polo shirt a little but then recovered enough to speak. ~ John Green

It's only sixteen ninety-five," I say with a flutter of my lashes.
"You're serious."
I prop my hands on my waist and stick out a hip, striking a pose worthy of a supermodel. "Look at me. Don't I look serious?"
She collapses into the chair outside the dressing room in a fit of giggles so cute they make my insides fizz. "No! You must be stopped," she says.
"Why?" I strut down an aisle of yellowed lingerie, swiveling my hips, batting bras with flicks of my fingers. "I will be the king of the disco. I will be - " I spin and strike another pose. "An inspiration."
She sniffs and swipes at her eyes. "The real Dylan would die before he'd be seen in public in something like that."
"The real Dylan is boring." I brace my hands on the arms of her chair and lean down until our faces are a whisper apart. "And he's not one fourth the kisser I am."
"Is that right?" Her lips quirk.
"You know it is."
Her smile melts, and her breath comes faster. "Yeah. I do. ~ Stacey Jay

We saw Uncle Jack every Christmas, and every Christmas he yelled across the street for Miss Maudie to come marry him. Miss Mauide would yell back, "Call a little louder, Jack Finch, and they'll hear you the post office, I haven't heard you yet!" Jem and I thought this a strange way to ask for a lady's hand in marriage, but then again Uncle Jack was rather strange. ~ Harper Lee

Because when I first saw you I thought-no, I knew-you were special. Because I still think that every time I look at you. Because I think you're smart and funny and brave. But most of all," he grins at me- "because I like questions. ~ Elizabeth Scott

Is he crazy? No one has ever told me my doodles are good, not that I flash them around or anything. Gen likes them, but she also thinks vampire romances are literature and sings along to 'Islands in the Stream.' Her tastes are dubious. She's not a reliable source. ~ Jules Barnard

And you would know so much about women, locked up in your castle."
"Locked up with eight wives. And sometimes I make house calls for my bargainers. There's many a lovely woman desperate enough to bargain with me."
This idea had never occurred to me before. "You touch another woman and I'll cut your hands off," I snapped.
He looked delighted. "I thought you were afraid of hurting me. ~ Rosamund Hodge

Hayden?"
"Yes,Gia?"
"Nothing I just wanted to say your name ~ Kasie West

Babe, I hate to break it to you, but you're one messed up mess."
"I know!" I exclaimed before breaking off into a fit of laughter. "I ought to be admitted or put on some serious medication or something. ~ K.R. Grace

Cole steps forward, his fingers reaching around my shoulders, and kisses me.
It is sudden and smooth and soft as air against my lips. The wind whips around us, tugging at the fabric of our clothes, but not pulling us apart.
And then it's gone, the cool pressure against my lips, and my eyes are open and looking into two gray eyes like river rocks.
"/That's/ what you wanted to show me?"
"No," he says, his fingers slipping down my arms as he leads me off the path and out, away from Near. "That was just in case. ~ Victoria Schwab

Brooke stared in surprise. "You brought me lunch?"
"I was in the neighborhood."
She checked out the label on the bag. "DMK is twenty minutes from here."
"I was in that neighborhood, and now I'm here," he said in exasperation. "Seriously, woman, you are impossible to feed." He strode over and set the bag on her desk. "One cheeseburger with spicy chipotle ketchup and a side of sweet potato fries - chosen specifically for a certain spicy and sweet girl I know - and a green dill pickle for your eyes. So there." He crossed his arms over his chest.
Brooke studied him. "You seem very ornery right now."
"As a matter of fact, I am."
"Why?"
"I don't know," he huffed. "Just ... eat your Brooke Burger. Stop asking so many questions. Sometimes a guy just wants to buy a girl lunch. Any objections to that? Good. Enjoy your Sunday, Ms. Parker."
He strode out of her office, gone as quickly as he'd appeared.
Brooke stared at the doorway and blinked. ~ Julie James

Kendrick walked over to her purposefully, hauled her up into his arms and gave her a mock frown. "I hunger, wench."
Genevieve put her arms around his neck. "Well? What are you going to hunt us for dinner?"
"I'll slay a few steaks from the freezer."
"You're so brave. ~ Lynn Kurland

When I introduced you to Mary Ann, I wanted to call you my girlfriend, Elli," he looked up at her to see her eyes were wide, "I've never had a girlfriend, so I'm not sure if I'll do the boyfriend/girlfriend thing right, but the thought of you being with someone else, or me with someone else, actually hurts my gut, so I guess what I'm trying to say is," he took a deep breath, this was huge, and he thought he sounded stupid but with the way her eyes were glazing over, maybe he was doing this right. "I was wondering if you wanted to be my girlfriend." She smiled at him lovingly, cupping his face in her hands.
"Are you sure? I'm kinda crazy." He laughed, kissing her palm.
"I'm sure."
"Then, yes, Shea, I would love to be your girlfriend. ~ Toni Aleo

My wife was too beautiful for words, but not for arguments. ~ John Barrymore

She got icing all over her face. I think that's why I like her. For the good stuff, she's willing to get icing all over her face. Who wouldn't want a girl like that? ~ Laura Ruby

Leaning down for a quick peck on Jeff's lips, and then he starts squirming and rearranging and manhandling until somehow they end up with Dan in the middle, Jeff stretched out on his left side, Evan on his right. Dan isn't really sure how that happened, and he's not at all confident that it's a good idea. ~ Kate Sherwood

You know," he says, voice still low."I have had nothing but trouble since you walked into my life." "I'd walk straight back out of it if only you'd let me. ~ L. H. Cosway

Your pupils are dilated. Does that mean you want to fuck me or eat me? Because I might have a problem with one of those.
-Dex to Sloane ~ Charlie Cochet

Sire," Oliver said as he helped Petunia to her feet, "I'd like to marry Petunia.
"Of course you would," retorted the King Gregor. "But not right now! we just got those two taken care of." He pointed to the twins who were still trying to play Christian's odd game. "And weddings are expensive! ~ Jessica Day George

He dug his heels into his horse's flanks and sped down the path. He heard the others call out behind him, but he ignored them. He was sure Karl and Johan and the others would have searched the rosebush and that entire are carefully enough; there was nothing to learn there. But he wanted to get to the hunting lodge, to find Prince Grigori and punch him in the nose for losing Petunia, and then make certain that her sisters were alright. And then her would find Petunia, and he would bring her home. ~ Jessica Day George

I say that I'm not into you like that, Camryn, because..," he pauses, searching my face, looking at my lips for a moment as if deciding whether or not he should kiss them again, " ... because you're not the girl I could only sleep with once. ~ J.A. Redmerski

You will stay with me. You will sleep here at my side and you will touch me. I am depressed but not when you stroke my chest. ~ Laurann Dohner

It wasn't love at first sight. It took a full five minutes. ~ Lucille Ball

She rolled over and sat up as he bent, tearing off his boots. "Whatcha doing?"
"Getting naked."
"I like that. ~ Laurann Dohner

She'd read ton of books with female heroines who swooned at the sight of their true love and had thought them to be incredibly wimpy. Now here she stood, barely able to keep herself upright. Not that she was in love...far from it. But a girl could appreciate a bona fide hottie when she saw one, right? ~ Abigail Owen

Shaking herself, Petunia looked around. Several of her sisters had been talking to her, but she hadn't heard them. "And that answers our questions about why he gave himself up," Poppy was saying, a smile turning up one corner of her mouth as she looked at Petunia. "Now if everyone could please avoid saying his name [Oliver], so that Petunia doesn't drift off again ... ? ~ Jessica Day George

Don't forget Mother's Day. Or as they call it in Beverly Hills, Dad's third wife Day. ~ Jay Leno

He looked at the cash siting there "What's that for?" I made myself smile "A good time. ~ Kasie West

Me neither," Shane put in. "Homie don't play that."
"I wonder, sometimes, if your generation speaks English at all," Amelie said. ~ Rachel Caine

Embarrassing facts, those would really help our children remember their classroom lessons better. ~ Bauvard

Diesel sucked air. "You keep fondling me like that, and I might have to marry you."
"I'm not fondling you. I'm looking for the keys!"
"Could you look a little more gently? You're scaring my boys. ~ Janet Evanovich

We may have been like needles in a hay stack, but they were like needles ... in a stack of needles ~ D.J. MacHale

You know the funny thing about regrets?" Jordan said, his eyes full of mischief. "You don't know you're going to have them until afterwards. ~ Lynette Noni

Did anyone wonder if someone hit his head for him? ~ K.J. Charles

For the first time in my life, I was in a shoot-out. A real, honest-to-goodness shoot-out with a bad guy. And, apparently, we both sucked. ~ Darynda Jones

The rat gave birth. Six little ones ... cute baby rats ... None of them are like Hitler. ~ Yoshihiro Tatsumi

The only person who worries about my mother is God, and that's only because she wants His job. ~ Sue Civil-Brown

Kids are brought into show business because they are cute and see truth and they're very bright. But there's a sense of doing it because you want the adults to be approving of you. You want to make them happy. ~ Anna Chlumsky

You're never going to go. Why would you go? It's a disgusting place. It's always wet even when it's dry. There's nothing there. Farmers aren't really people, you know this. They're just necessary, we need somebody to kill cows. ~ Dylan Moran

Is this a habit of yours?" he asks.
"What?"
"Dropping stuff whenever you first see me? It's kind of cute. Flattering," he adds, straightening while easily holding all of my stuff in his giant arms.
I've recovered enough to roll my eyes. "Maybe the habit is connected to your urge to rifle through my private things every time you see me?"
"It's possible. Your stuff is so randomly interesting." He eyes my science kit and then scans through the pile of papers in his hands. "You got any other lists that need checking off? College tuition aside, I'm also trying to save for a new car." He laughs. ~ Anne Eliot

There are times when parenthood seems nothing more than feeding the hand that bites you. ~ Peter De Vries

Regarding creating a new work ... Sometimes you have to beat it like a red-headed step-child. ~ John P. Sousa

For a stand-up comic, a minute on TV without a laugh was death. And Carson was adamant about the formula. He had recently stopped by the Improv to see Jay Leno and Andy Kaufman perform and had pronounced both of them "not ready," telling Budd Friedman, "They're funny, but they don't have six minutes." By ~ William Knoedelseder

Where did you meet?" he pressed on.
I shrugged and considered a little rephrasing. "I was out for a run."
"From who?"
I leaned back to take a long, very long, slow sip of that beer.
Knox leaned forward. "I think we're both bullsh*tting here, you ever play that card game?"
"With my grandma, every Sunday after church. ~ Dannika Dark

I went to the butchers to buy a leg of lamb. "Is it Scotch?", I asked. "Why?" the butcher said in reply. "Are you going to talk to it or eat it?". "In that case, have you got any wild duck?". "No", he responded, "but I've got one I could aggravate for you." ~ Chic Murray

Expired condoms are like nuclear waste: there's nothing sensible you can do with it. ~ Andrew Smith

I understand a woman who validates herself by getting attention from the opposite sex. I have a friend who is that to a T ... Doesn't mean she isn't a good person. That's a funny character to play. ~ Cheryl Hines

It was funny, Grey thought. Not funny ha-ha, but funny strange, the whole idea of time. He'd thought it was one thing but it was actually another. It wasn't a line but a circle, and even more; it was a circle made of circles made of circles, each lying on top of the other, so that every moment was next to every other moment, all at once. And once you knew this you couldn't unknow it. Such as now the way he could see events as they were about to unfold, as if they'd already happened, because in a way they had. ~ Justin Cronin

They think they can make fuel from horse manure - now, I don't know if your car will be able to get 30 miles to the gallon, but it's sure gonna put a stop to siphoning. ~ Billie Holiday

I hear you're quite the writer. Quite the teacher's pet."
"I ... I don't know what you mean."
"No? The maybe you're in for a surprise. A maybe it won't be a nice one."
Kate heard her voice lashing out, braver than she felt.
"I don't know what you're talking about. But nothing that pertains to me is any of your business.'
The match hissed again. She saw his black, black eyes flickering.
"You're right. How inconsiderate of me."
Shaken, Kate willed her feet to move her forward.
"You should be more careful," Pearce said. "Anyone could find your key. Anyone could get into your cabin."
Kate whirled to face him. "I have a roommate. I'm not alone."
"A roommate?" And he sounded like he was smiling ... a dark strange smile as if she'd said something particularly funny. "If someone wanted to get you," Pearce said slowly, and another match went out, "a roommate wouldn't stop them. They'd just get you. Wouldn't they? ~ Richie Tankersley Cusick

My act is very educational. I heard a man leaving the other night saying, 'Well that taught me a lesson.' ~ Ken Dodd

It's funny how the colors of the real world only seem really real when you watch them on a screen. ~ Anthony Burgess

It's funny how all of this has worked out - I wasn't popular in high school, but now every drunken guy in the United States wants to be my pal. They all want to buy me a shot, and pretty soon I'm throwing up. ~ Jimmy Kimmel

You know, it's a funny thing. You can smoke yourself to death, drink yourself to death, work yourself to death, and even eat yourself to death. But that's all acceptable. The only thing you can't do medically is screw yourself to death, and yet that's where they put all the obstacles. ~ Mario Puzo

Now, the magic of British parks at night, as Bill Oddie presents.. Gaywatch. ~ Frankie Boyle

Leader, bandits at 2 o'clock! Roger; it's only 1:30 now-what'll I do 'til then? ~ Bill Watterson

I walked by a dry cleaner at 3 am, and there was a sign: "Sorry, we're closed" You don't have to be sorry, it's 3 am, and you're a dry cleaner! It would be ridiculous for me to expect you to be open! I'm not gonna walk in at 10 am and say "I walked by here at 3 and you were closed - somebody owes me an apology!" ~ Mitch Hedberg

You could still be lying," says the Roach. He turns to Cardan. "Try her."

"Your pardon?" Cardan says, drawing himself up, and the Roach seems to suddenly remember to whom he's speaking in such an offhanded way.

"Don't be such a prickly rose, Your Majesty," the Roach says with a shrug and a grin. "I'm not giving you an order. I'm suggesting that if you tried to glamour Jude, we could find out the truth."

Cardan sighs and walks toward me. I know this is necessary. I know that he doesn't intend to hurt me. I know he can't glamour me. And yet I draw back automatically.

"Jude?" he asks.

"Go ahead," I say.

I hear the glamour enter his voice, heady and seductive and more powerful than I expected. "Crawl to me," he says with a grin. Embarrassment pinks my cheeks.

I stay where I am, looking at all their faces. "Satisfied?"

The Bomb nods. "You're not charmed. ~ Holly Black

Are you two you know?" Jacob pointed at us. " Together? Together? "
I didn't get a chance to answer. Cam spun me around and kissed me, right there between the two buildings. It was no friendly peck on the lips. When our tongues touched, my bag slipped off my arm and hit the frosted ground.
"Holy crap," Jacob muttered. "I think they're going to make babies. ~ Jennifer L. Armentrout

I want all hellions to quit puffing that hell fume in God's clean air. ~ Carry Nation