The Monkeys Quotes

North Korea is the country that the monkeys in the Wizard of Oz came from. ~ Lewis Black

It has been suggested that an army of monkeys might be trained to pound typewriters at random in the hope that ultimately great works of literature would be produced. Using a coin for the same purpose may save feeding and training expenses and free the monkeys for other monkey business. ~ William Feller

I bet it breaks your heart to have two of your friends pine for me the way they do," he said proudly. "Luna ... and now Scarlet. They can't keep their hands off of me."
"It's just because you are foreign to them. It's like if they went to the zoo and stared at the monkeys. You are the monkey. ~ Ellen Schreiber

The feelings I had for my sister were jumbled together, like the monkeys in a barrel game we'd had as children. All the brightly colored monkeys with their curved arms tangled and entwined, so convoluted that it was almost impossible to separate them. ~ Karen White

I don't understand why women get upset when you compare them to one of the monkeys from Planet of the Apes, even one of the heroic ones, like Dr. Zera. ~ David James

Comedians are the monkeys of acting. When you go to the zoo, everybody loves the monkey exhibit. ~ Tracy Morgan

Think about the animals used in product testing. Think about the monkeys shot into space. Without their death, their pain, without their sacrifice, we would have nothing. ~ Chuck Palahniuk

I could neither laugh with nor at the solemn utterances of men I esteemed ponderous asses; nor could I laugh, nor engage in my old-time lightsome persiflage, with the silly superficial chatterings of women, who, underneath all their silliness and softness, were as primitive, direct, and deadly in their pursuit of biological destiny as the monkeys women were before they shed their furry coats and replaced them with the furs of other animals. ~ Jack London

One day I saw the big jaguar,Calypso, jump up from the sand and run quickly, snarling, into the jungle. I looked around and the monkeys were jumping and screeching in the trees. Gazing across the water I saw something moving out there, getting closer. It was a canoe with three men paddling towards my shore. I started to smile and then I worried that they might want to kill me. I ran to my house and brought out my bow and arrows. I stood there on the beach, with my feet shoulder-width apart, and prepared for their arrival. ~ Doug Hiser

While National Geographic magazine had given me a taste of the world, the three-dimensional details of this moment - the tickle of the rain drops, the suck sound of my feet in the mud, the challenge of getting photographs of the monkeys, my immature urge to make the driver wait even longer because he was annoying - would feed me for years to come. ~ Kristine K. Stevens

On the Ning Nang Nong
Where the Cows go Bong!
And the Monkeys all say Boo!
Theres a Nang Nong Ning
Where the trees go Ping!
And the tea pots Jibber Jabber Joo
On the Nong Ning Nang
All the Mice go Clang!
And you just cant catch em when they do!
So its Ning Nang Nong!
Cows go Bong!
Nong Nang Ning!
Trees go Ping!
Nong Ning Nang!
The mice go Clang!
What a noisy place to belong,Is the Ning Nang Ning Nang Nong! ~ Spike Milligan

The monkeys solved the puzzle simply because they found it gratifying to solve puzzles. They enjoyed it. The joy of the task was its own reward. ~ Daniel H. Pink

God likes a little humor, as is evidence by the fact that he made the monkeys, the parrot
and some of you people. ~ Billy Sunday

"Face the brutes." That is a lesson for all life-face the terrible, face it boldly. Like the monkeys, the hardships of life fall back when we cease to flee before them. ~ Swami Vivekananda

The show is over. The monkey's dead! ~ Tennessee Williams

Edmond Locard ordered all the local organ grinders and their simian employees brought to his laboratory. A number of the monkeys, perhaps concerned about an infringement of their civil rights, resisted fingerprinting and had to be restrained. The organ grinders were more cooperative. When the burglarizing beast had been identified, his companion's rooms were searched and there the missing items were found. ~ E.J. Wagner

The monkeys, she explained, were considered reincarnated politicians, which made Rue laugh and the stick entirely understandable. ~ Gail Carriger

One animal died and, after it tested positive for Reston virus, forty-nine others housed in the same room were "euthanized" as a precaution. (Most of those, tested posthumously, were negative.) Ten employees who had helped unload and handle the monkeys were also screened for infection, and they also tested negative, but none of them were euthanized. ~ David Quammen

With every passing year we discover more evidence to support Darwin's revolutionary hypothesis that the cognitive and emotional lives of animals differ only by degree, from the fishes to the birds to the monkeys to humans. ~ Roger Fouts

I was going to make a confession. Then I remembered I don't make them very well. We still need to see the monkeys."
"You don't really think I'm going to let a provocative statement like that slip by,do you?"
"Well...I thought the best way to discourage you was to agree to go out with you-to some place like this, which I thought would bore you to distraction-then be as obnoxious as possible."
"Have you been obnoxious?" His tone was mild and entirely too serious. "I thought you've been behaving very naturally."
"Ouch." Shelby rubbed at the figurative wound under her heart. "In any case, I get the distinct impression that I haven't discouraged you at all."
"Really?" Reaching for more popcorn, he leaned close and spoke gently in her ear "How did you come by that?"
"Oh-" She cleared her throat. "Just a hunch."
He found that tiny show of nerves very rewarding. Yes, the puzzle was coming together, piece by careful piece. It was the way he'd always structured his life. "Odd.And not once since we've been here have I mentioned that I'd like to find a small, dim room and make love to you,over and over."
Warily, Shelby slid her eyes to his. "I'd just as soon you didn't.
"All right." Alan slipped an arm around her waist. "I won't mention it while we're here."
A smile tugged at her mouth, but she shook her head. "It's not going to come to that, Alan.It can't."
"We have a fundamental disagreement." He paused on a bridge. Beneath them, s ~ Nora Roberts

You know, if you have a zoo you don't want the other creatures to see you. You want them to hang out and act properly and, you know, when the monkeys will come and ask for the bananas, they won't act like monkeys. If you want them to act on what their true nature is, you've got to leave them alone. ~ Tarsem Singh

Since leaving Moscow I have encountered an alarming level of ignorance about biological weapons. Some of the best scientists I've encountered in the West say it isn't possible to alter viruses genetically to make reliable weapons, or to store enough of a give pathogen for strategic purposes, or to deliver it in a way that assures maximum killing power. My knowledge and experience tell me that they are wrong. I have written this book to explain why.
There are some who maintain that discussing the subject will cause needless alarm. But existing defenses against these weapons are dangerously inadequate, and when biological terror strikes, as I am convinced it will, public ignorance will only heighten the disaster. The first step we must take to protect ourselves is to understand what biological weapons are and how they work. The alternative is to remain as helpless as the monkeys in the Aral Sea. ~ Ken Alibek

The head monkey at Paris puts on a traveller's cap, and all the monkeys in America do the same. ~ Henry David Thoreau

If the monkeys had been concerned only with monkey Beings they would never have become men. ~ Harry Hooton

I don't have time for lie-on-the-beach vacations. I'm a zoo person. There's one in New Jersey where animals actually come up to your car. I love the monkeys - I used to give them bubblegum to chew. ~ Missy Elliot

There,he reminds me of you." Shelby indicated a black panther stretched in a path of sunlight, calmly watching the river of people who passed by.
"Is that so?" Alan studied the cat. "Indolent? Subdued?"
Shelby let out her smoke-edged laugh. "Oh,no, Senator.Patient, brooding. And arrogant enough to believe this confinement is nothing he can't work with." Turning, she leaned back against the barrier to consider Alan as she had considered the panther. "He's taken stock of the situation,and decided he can pretty much have his own way as things are.I wonder..." Her brows drew together inn concentration. "I wonder just what he'd do if he were really crossed.He doesn't appear to have a temper. Cats usually don't until they're pushed too far just that one time, and then-they're deadly."
Alan gave her an odd smile before he took her hand to draw her toward the path again. "He normally sees that he's not often crossed."
Shelby tossed her head and met the smile with a bland look. "Let's go look at the monkeys.It always makes me think I'm sitting in the Senate Gallery."
"Nasty," he commented and tugged on her hair.
"I know.I couldn't help it." Briefly she rested her head on his shoulder as they walked. "I'm often not a nice person. Grant and I both seem to have inherited a streak of sarcasm-or maybe it's cynicism. ~ Nora Roberts

Will they not for their part have monkeys and marmosets to make them fine coats and doublets of leather and iron? Hands would not be a problem, for the monkeys could work with their hands, and so they would in no way be inferior to man; they could even be writers. They would never be so feeble as not to put their heads together to find ways of resisting these arms, and they would construct machines of their own with which they would inflict great harm on men. ~ Jean De Meun

I am sorry. It is hard to convey five-dimensional ideas in a language evolved to scream defiance at the monkeys in the next tree ~ Terry Pratchett

Studies of decision-making in the monkey, where activity of single neurons in parietal cortex is recorded, you can see a lot about the time-accuracy trade-off in the monkey's decision, and you can see from the neuron's activity at what point in his accumulation of evidence he makes his decision to make a particular movement. ~ Patricia Churchland

Civilization today reminds me of an ape with a blowtorch playing in a room full of dynamite. It looks like the monkeys are about to operate the zoo, and the inmates are taking over the asylum. ~ Vance Havner

He's not going to sell any of those caps. He should just let the monkeys keep them. They are the only ones that want them anyway. ~ Jim Gaffigan

Some say that AIDS came from the monkeys, and I doubt that because we have been living with monkeys from time immemorial, others say it was a curse from God, but I say it cannot be that. ~ Wangari Maathai

And it's always better to check than be sorry," Quain added. "'It worked' could be code for the dead are invading."
"Wow, that's ... really random, Quain. Aside from you , who would ever put those two things together? ~ Maria V. Snyder

Holden was starting to feel like they were all monkeys playing with a microwave. Push a button, a light comes on inside, so it's a light. Push a different button and stick your hand inside, it burns you, so it's a weapon. Learn to open and close the door, it's a place to hide things. Never grasping what it actually did, and maybe not even having the framework necessary to figure it out. No monkey ever reheated a frozen burrito. So here the monkeys were, poking the shiny box and making guesses about what it did. ~ James S.A. Corey

Si! Today there was a report from scientists who have spent their entire lives studying chimpanzees and you know what they said? They said the monkeys are learning to make spears! They've never been able to make weapons before but now, now, all of a sudden they can!" She gave him an ominous look and took the lid off the pot of boiling water. "Mark my words, Giacomo. They're doing it for a reason. The next thing you know, they'll be coming after us."
"Mmm. That will be bad."
"Si, very bad." She threw the pasta into the pot. "But I will be ready for them. ~ Suzanne Harper

i heard someone tried the monkeys-on-typewriters bit trying for the plays of W. Shakespeare, but all they got was the collected works of Francis Bacon. ~ Bill Hirst

The monkeys seized all the cocoanuts within their reach and sent them down upon us ~ Johann David Wyss

I heard a delightful - and possibly apocryphal - story about what happened when the British introduced golf to India in the 1820s. Upon building the first golf course there, the Royal Calcutta, the British discovered a problem: Indigenous monkeys were intrigued by the little white balls and would swoop down out of the trees and onto the fairways, picking them up and carrying them off. This was a disruption, to say the least. In response, officials tried erecting fences to keep the monkeys out, but the monkeys climbed right over. They tried capturing and relocating the monkeys, but the monkeys kept coming back. They tried loud noises to scare them away. Nothing worked. In the end, they arrived at a solution: They added a new rule to the game - "Play the ball where the monkey drops it. ~ Ed Catmull

The fountain of youth is like the monkey's paw in the W. W. Jacobs story. It never ends well. ~ Sarah Monette

Are you an evolutionist?
I'm an absurdist, ma'am. But let's suppose evolution is true; what about the monkeys today? Why can't we see them evolving? Are they still evolving? ~ Harrison Wheeler

There is a possibly apocryphal story that in Southeast Asia, people catch monkeys by placing a banana in a box with a hole in the bottom and hanging the box from a tree. The monkey reaches in and grabs the banana but is unable to withdraw its hand. The clenched fist holding the banana is too big to fit through the hole. To escape, all the monkey has to do is release the banana. Sometimes, the monkeys hold on for a long time and are then captured. People, too, often give up their freedom by holding on to things too long. ~ Carl Greer

Do you know the story of the monkeys of the shitty island?" I asked Nobory Wataya.
He shook his head, with no sign of interest. "Never heard of it".
"Somewhere, far, far away, there's a shitty island. An island without a name. An island not worth giving a name. A shitty island with shitty shape. On this shitty island grow palm trees that also have shitty shapes. And the palm trees produce coconuts that give off a shitty smell. Shitty monkeys live in the trees, and they love to eat these shitty-smelling coconuts,after which they shit the world's foulest shit. The shit falls on the ground and builds up shitty mounds, making the shitty palm trees that grow on them even shittier. It's an endless cycle."
I drank the rest of my coffee.
"As I sat here looking at you," I continued, " I suddenly remembered the story of this shitty island. What I'm trying to say is this. A certain kind of shittiness, a certain kind of stagnation, a certain kind of darkness, goes on propagating itself by its own power in its own self-contained cycle. And once it passed a certain point, no one can stop it -even if the person himself want to stop it. ~ Haruki Murakami

The monkeys ignored him completely as they discussed wind currents and angle of approach, and even the Lion seemed to have forgotten he was there. He might as well be back in that field tied to a post for all the good the Wizard's gifts were doing him. ~ Danielle Paige

Year after year
On the monkey's face:
A monkey's face. ~ Matsuo Basho

Now he was gone.
She said a silent prayer. Sent it up to heaven.
Sam, if you can hear me, I hope you've got nice food where you are. Some vegetables like these. They're meant to be good for you. So eat them all up, like I'm doing. When I die I'll come and see you, and we'll be together again. But for now I'm going to think of you safe and happy and playing knights with a friend.
Love from Ella. Your sister.
P.S. I got a good long turn with Godzilla today after we got here. Godzilla is very happy.
P.P.S. I forgot, you never met Godzilla. He is a puppy and is very cute. He belonged to a boy called Joel who got killed by monkeys. I think the monkeys were sick. Monkeys are usually nice. At least in stories.
P.P.P.S. Maybe you'll meet Joel where you are. Say hello. He is nice.
P.P.P.P.S. Good night, Sam. The others call you Small Sam. To me you're just Sam - my brother.
I miss you. I wish I was with you. ~ Charlie Higson

If you look at the monkeys, you can learn many things about the men; if you look at the men, you can learn many things about the madness! ~ Mehmet Murat Ildan

Why is it alright to be going around, going mental with a gun, shooting all the monkeys and killing them? Because one day we're going to run out. ~ Karl Pilkington

Don't sell your soul to buy peanuts for the monkeys. ~ Dorothy Salisbury Davis

One of my most laughable moments was when we visited the monkeys in Ubud - they really seemed to like me and at one point, I had three males on my head and shoulders. ~ Carolyn Murphy

What we must do is start viewing every cow, pig, chicken, monkey, rabbit, mouse, and pigeon as our family members. ~ Gary Yourofsky

Black people have this thing about calling themselves apes and monkeys I know they get real (whatever) and I don't blame em'. But I feel like I'm a brute. I am, but I'm smart though. I'm not a dummy. ~ Sean Price

There is a terrible lot of us who don't think that we come from a monkey, but if there are some people who think that they do, why, it's not our business to rob them of what little pleasure they might get out of imagining it. ~ Will Rogers

No one is out to get you. It's just that ... people are monkeys. ~ Stan Brakhage

For me, two of my favourite science fiction films are Blade Runner, which is fantastic, and Terry Gilliam's Twelve Monkeys. Both of those were smart science fiction films hitting more of a medium budget, and I desperately hope there is an audience for that kind of film because I would love that to be my next film, on that kind of scale. ~ Duncan Jones

If wishes were flying monkeys, we'd all be wearing tiny hats. ~ E.J. Stevens

Slavery is an institution for converting men into monkeys. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

In my imagination you're waiting lying on your side with your hands between your thighs. ~ Arctic Monkeys

I don't want to sound pretentious, but I love art, I like to go to museums, and I like to read books. ~ Rainn Wilson

On Keith Richards: He's like a monkey with arthritis. ~ Elton John

An old monkey never makes a pretty face. ~ Francois Rabelais

When either one of us gets an order from Wolfe that isn't mind-bleedingly stupid there will be no way you will miss it, as we will both be leaping up and down and screaming uncontrollably, like adolescent monkeys, in our shock. ~ Lia Habel

You can look at a monkey and see that there is more than a five percent difference in DNA. ~ Bob Enyart

You're an idiot, Dimitri. All you monkeys are idiots. You sit around arguing back and forth over whether avatars are self-aware, or whether dolphins are intelligent, or whether dogs get to go to heaven or not. There's only one person that you really know for sure is self-aware, and that's you. Everybody else, you're just taking their word for it. ~ Edward Ashton

DO NOT UNDERSTAND YOU MONKEYS. ~ Jay Kristoff

Culture is roughly everything we do and monkeys don't. ~ FitzRoy Richard Somerset

So thirsty I could lick a monkey's balls. ~ Mercedes Fox

Hey whatever puts you in a good mood is fine by me. For all I care, monkeys could have danced around your classroom all hour if it made you happy."
"Don't be so dramatic Jackson. I would much rather it is zebras," I replied with a chuckle.
Jackson and Noel, Dancing with Death ~ Andrea Heltsley

If God didn't mean for us to use drugs, It would never have made us such curious monkeys, nor given us so many interesting vegetables. ~ Charles L. Smith

I think that last batch of sea monkeys ate my cat!!! ~ Neil Leckman

We are all Clapping Monkeys, but while some of us smile, others look around to see if anyone has noticed. ~ Fennel Hudson

Look at these clowns ...
-Hand picked monkeys.
What's wrong with this scene?
-Everything. ~ Jose N Harris

Darwinian man, though well-behaved, at best is only a monkey shaved. ~ W.S. Gilbert

you were attacked by cement monkeys? ~ Tom Cook

Yeah, dolphins and monkeys basically could play chess together. Those are brilliant animals. ~ Perry DeAngelis

[I don't get it. You guys look down on chimps for flinging their own poo but you think it's fine to fling other kinds of poo around? I mean, you get opposable thumbs and this is what you do with them?] ~ Kevin Hearne

Because when you got right down to it, humans were still just curious monkeys. They still had to poke everything they found with a stick to see what it did. ~ James S.A. Corey

onanists breaking a sweat on monkeys, ponies, birds; ~ Yann Martel

We are consciousness. We may not always be monkeys. ~ Terence McKenna

There is a special department of Hell for students of probability. In this department there are many typewriters and many monkeys. Every time that a monkey walks on a typewriter, it types by chance one of Shakespeare's sonnets. ~ Bertrand Russell

Welcome back, my cheeky wee monkeys. ~ Craig Ferguson

I get burned out on standup. But I like acting. I do like it. But sometimes you just feel like a monkey. You just feel like a complete tool. But I like it. I do like it. Stand-up is just more free. A lot more freedom because you just do what you want to do. ~ Zach Galifianakis

Right." Sadie looked dazed. "You've got a monkey butler. Why not? ~ Rick Riordan

Frankly, sharing a media market with Chuck Schumer is like sharing a banana with a monkey. Take a little bite of it, and he will throw his own feces at you. ~ Jon Corzine

Monkeys can rip your face off. ~ Jennifer Neves

So do you really expect me to continue to believe that incredibly sucktastic we're-just-a-bunch-of-grease-monkeys line? Seriously, dude, I could eat a bowl of Alpha-Bits cereal and crap out a better story than that. ~ Julie Ann-Walker

If living on fruits and water is of superior merit, monkeys and fish will go to heaven before men. ~ Meera

I am afraid of radium and polonium ... I don't want to monkey with them. ~ Thomas A. Edison