Farts Quotes

Loved me. How over the top and dramatic can one person get? I mean, hell. Lust at seventeen, sure. Sex buddies at eighteen, shit yeah. But love? Love doesn't enter anyone's life until you turn forty-two, add fifty pounds to your body, and start complaining about the younger generations. Once someone can put up with your forty-two-year-old annoying ass and nasty farts, you know that's real love. ~ Brittainy C. Cherry

And nostalgia is a cancer. Nostalgia will fill your heart up with tumors. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's what you are. You're just an old fart dying of terminal nostalgia. ~ Sherman Alexie

Shit" Bug said, his face sour. "It's that thing again. We've been dealing with it since Pierce. You think you have a lead and then poof" - he made a puffing motion with his fingers - "it melts into nothing and all you have is frustration and the far noise your face makes when you hit you desk with it."

Fart.... what? ~ Ilona Andrews

I've always hated dating," I said instead. "In fact, if I could bypass all that might I bestow upon you a kiss business, I would. Why can't we all just skip to the comfortable part of relationships? Go straight to the bit where you can walk around in your undies, let farts go and blame them on the dog, and leave the door open when you're taking a piss?"
"First of all, there is no part of a relationship that should involve that last bit, and second of all, dating is the best part. All those butterflies and excitement, the sexual tension. Wanting to skip to the comfortable bit is laziness. It means you don't have to put in any effort to woo someone. Also, if memory serves, you've never had a relationship that lasted more than six months."
"Thanks for the reminder, oh Sarah of Ye Old Wet Blanket," I groused, but she was right. I hadn't dated anyone for longer than six months; and even then it hadn't really been a relationship with any meaningful or lasting impact.
"Ye Old Wet Blanket was my grandmother's name, I'll have you know...You're thirty years old, practically a baby. You've just burned yourself out. You need to find the excitement in life again, the thrill to be had from simple things."
"I do get a thrill from simple things," I countered. "Didn't I mention I fixed my tap this weekend? And I had Earl Grey tea with breakfast."
"Oh. Stop. Too much excitement. I can't handle it. ~ L.H. Cosway

These days if I ate three bites of a Blizzard, that Blizzard would turn into a tornado of farts. ~ Mamrie Hart

Take it easy, I carefully suggested to a pale Jo. She was chugging a glass of Champagne so quickly I half expected the bubble to shoot right down to her arse and release tiny Champagne sparkle farts. ~ Becca Lee

Just let them sit in the goddam sun. But the world won't let them because there's nothing more dangerous than letting old farts sit in the sun. They might be thinking. Same thing with kids. Keep 'em busy or they might start thinking. ~ Frank McCourt

I want no part of this nonsense. This whole city is a butt that farts horror. ~ David Wong

Purple light passed over the paper, but nothing happened.
"Next!" Amy said. She was sure the man in black was going to burst in on them any second.
"Whoa!" Dan said.
Amy gripped his arm. "You found it?"
"No, but look! This whole essay - 'To the Royal Academy.' He wrote a whole essay on farts!" Dan grinned with delight. "He's proposing a scientific study on different fart smells. You're right, Amy. This guy was a genius! ~ Rick Riordan

There are more microbes per person than the entire population of the world. Imagine that. Per person. This means that if the time scale is diminished in proportion to that of space it would be quite possible for the whole story of Greece and Rome to be played out between farts. ~ Alan Bennett

Weightless (in air), alcohol units 8 (but in-flight so canceled out by altitude), cigarettes 0 (desperate: no-smoking seat), calories 1 million (entirely made up of things would never have dreamt of putting in self's mouth were they not on in-flight tray), farts from traveling companion 38 (so far), variations in fart aroma 0. ~ Helen Fielding

If I could light my own farts I could fly to the moon or at least Uranus. ~ Robin Williams

Just as you and I speak by forming words, the natural, private discourse of the Sanza twins appears to consist entirely of farts and savage beatings. What ~ Scott Lynch

Warren made bursting noises under the bed. A rancorous stench. Dog Farts Fell Family of Four. ~ Annie Proulx

What kind of doctor are you? Get up! Get up! And then all of a sudden she let out the biggest, loudest, smelliest fart in the history of farts. Mom thinks it was actually the fart that finally woke the doctor up. Anyway, ~ R.J. Palacio

I always thought that farts were funny, and I always thought that they were mine to talk about because they came out of my body. ~ Jenny Slate

It having been a very cold night last night I had got some cold, and so in pain by wind, and a sure precursor of pain is sudden letting off farts, and when that stops, then my passages stop and my pain begins ~ Samuel Pepys

The dads in those tv shows spend a great deal of time talking to their kids in their living rooms. Steven Keaton - the dad of my dreams - seems to do nothing but sit on his couch or at his kitchen table talking to his children about their myriad teenage calamities. He listens and listens to his kids and he pours glasses of orange juice and hands them to his kids as he listens some more. He tells his kids he loves them by telling his kids he loves them. Dad tells me he loves me when he forms a pistol out of this forefinger and thumb and points it at me as he farts. He tells us he loves us by showing us the tattoo we never knew he had on the inside of his bottom lip: Fuck you. ~ Trent Dalton

That's what most people don't realize; that's why one out of every two marriages fail. Because people go into them with hearts in their eyes and forever on their lips and no concept whatsoever of what that truly means. Of course it's going to be hard work. Of course you are going to get angry and upset and wonder why, out of everyone in the world entire world, you decided to fall in love with an idiot who farts in his sleep and eats like a pig and can't ever be assed to pick up his own dirty underwear off the fucking floor. ~ Lielabell

I'm only interested in heavy metal when it's me who's playing it. I suppose it's a bit like smelling your own farts. ~ John Entwistle

Earth's flaming farts, it worked! ~ N.K. Jemisin

Oh for God's sake, Jack, lighten up. You know the old saying. Every man loves the smell of his own farts." In ~ Jake Needham

A man who farts in bed . . . is a man who loves life. ~ Muriel Barbery

Modern music is three farts and a raspberry, orchestrated. ~ John Barbirolli

Oh God. I'm jealous of farts. ~ Jennifer Lynn Barnes

It goes on top and breaks down,
It can emit a high or low sound.
Each atom of such noisy chute
Exhale the aroma of a ripe fruit. ~ Ana Claudia Antunes

Besides, when you say you're a feminist it annoys the bigots and the old farts and the prissy ladies so much, it's kind of irresistible. ~ Ursula K. Le Guin

a bag of wet farts. But ~ Pierce Brown

What do you do for fun in this town?
Well, you know. Wash dishes. Wipe up baby drool, put a new quart of oil in him once in a while. Watch the Weather Channel to see if any of the neighbors have been blown away by a tornado. Eat too much cheese and get cheese farts.
Keeps you busy, huh? ~ Nick Wilgus

So familiar are eggs to us, however, that in the eighteenth century they were referred to as cackling farts, on the basis that chickens cackled all the time and eggs came out of the back of them. ~ Mark Forsyth

I have already spoken of my fondness for odors, the strong odors of the earth, of latrines, of the loins of Arabs and, above all, the odor of my farts, which is not the odor of my shit, a loathsome odor, so much so that here again I bury myself beneath the covers and gather in my cupped hands my crushed farts, which I carry to my nose. They open to me hidden treasures of happiness. I inhale, I suck in. I feel them, almost solid, going down through my nostrils. But only the odor of my own farts delights me, and those of the handsomest boy repel me. Even the faintest doubt as to whether an odor comes from me or someone else is enough for me to stop relishing it. ~ Jean Genet

At one time or another, farts have coincided with every other sound, including this quote. ~ Craig Benzine

Pliny paid for his "phenomena"! ... I've paid a bit, too ... everything worthwhile has its cost! ... if it's free, you're down with the shithead fraternity! blabbermouths, charlatans, the whole gang! ... into the crapper with 'em! every one! right in the shitter! ... it's unlistenable! ... just a bunch of farts! ... I'm telling you! ... ~ Louis Ferdinand Celine

I once lay in a white hospital for the dying and the dying self, where some god pissed a rain of reason to make things grow only to die, where on my knees I prayed for LIGHT, I prayed for l*i*g*h*t, and praying crawled like a blind slug into the web where threads of wind stuck against my mind and I died of pity for Man, for myself, on a cross without nails, watching in fear as the pig belches in his sty, farts, blinks and eats. ~ Charles Bukowski

Bel pointed. "Head. Tail. Pets go here." He pointed to the dog's head again. "Farts come out here." He pointed to the dog's back end. "That's all you need to know about Stump. ~ Lisa Henry

You had an arse full of farts that night, darling, and I fucked them out of you... ~ James Joyce

Suddenly I was tired of Lotterman; he was a phony and he didn't even know it. He was forever yapping about freedom of the press and keeping the paper going, but if he'd had a million dollars and all the freedom in the world he'd still put out a worthless newspaper because he wasn't smart enough to put out a good one. He was just another noisy little punk in the great legion of punks who marched between the banners of bigger and better men. Freedom, Truth, Honour - you could rattle off a hundred such words and behind every one of them would gather a thousand punks, pompous little farts, waving the banner with one hand and reaching under the table with the other.
I stood up. "Ed," I said using his name for the first time, "I believe I'll quit. ~ Hunter S. Thompson

The rooms were small and airless and cramped. To make matters worse, somebody in our group was making the most dreadful silent farts. Fortunately, it was me, so I wasn't nearly as bothered as the others. ~ Bill Bryson

For the second Monday in February, Sara had this joke: I was in the pub yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately needed to fart. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my farts with the beat. After a couple of songs, I started to feel better. I finished my beer and noticed everyone was staring at me. Then I suddenly remembered that I was listening to my iPod. ~ Dale Waller

Adverse winds are holding mad Christmas in him, boys. ~ Herman Melville

Uh, the Vane I know could barely control his farts, much less the wind. ~ Shannon Messenger

And then all of a sudden she let out the biggest, loudest, smelliest fart in the history of farts. Mom ~ R.J. Palacio

...it was like finding a brother who farts in key. ~ Dale McGowan

The idea of spending another six hours with Leon and his farts was more than I could take. ~ John Scalzi

If I could make money making armpit farts, I would. But since I can't, I teach. And write. ~ Richard B. Knight

When we were still living at home, all he ever drank was cola, huge amounts of it; he had no problem knocking back an entire king-size bottle at dinnertime. Then he would produce these gigantic belches, for which he was sometimes sent to his room, belches that lasted ten years or longer
like subterranean thunder rolling up and exploding from somewhere deep down in his stomach
and for which he enjoyed a certain schoolyard fame: among the boys, that is, for he knew even then that girls were only repulsed by burps and farts. ~ Herman Koch

In a battle, an army of farts would surely beat an army of noses, even if those noses were armed with fingers that could flick long-range boogers. ~ Jarod Kintz

Best to leave farts and the past behind you ~ Penny Reid

Slick, come up to the crow's nest for some fresh air? Can't blame you. Those beans served at lunch may be Hitler's latest secret weapon. Imagine, asphyxiating nearly three-hundred men by their own farts, and not a single shot fired. ~ Dane Hatchell

Bug? You sack of sweat stink. I've got farts that smell sweeter than you. Think you're better than me? Poop ice cream cones, do you? Call me a bug! Rachel, let me do him now. ~ Kim Harrison

Around them small animals scampered along knotted cables and flaking vines, chirruping, squealing, venting yellow farts. Everywhere was animation, purpose, hurry. Momentum. ~ Gregory Benford

I matched him glare for glare and refused to back down. I'd learnt that much, working with the guys we recruited for protection work. Forget your average heavy ... we used the elite. Ex-commandos used to living behind enemy lines on nothing more than fresh air and dung beetles, and who could zero in on a target using mouse farts three miles away. ~ Mina Carter

To know that we are only angels weighed down by filth, free of guilt? The bacteria in our bellies are responsible for the farts which shame us, tiny monsters shitting in their billions all over our pure skin create the acid reek of "our" sweat. And Slade: when the "inner voices" tell us we're unworthy or instruct us to "love" and "hate," despite our best instincts ... are these incessant distracting thoughts our own? Or do we only hear the voice of the eternal germ screaming in our heads? ~ Grant Morrison

Roni frowned as Kye suddenly started spinning in a circle. "What's he doing?"
Markus sighed. "He farts and then looks for it. ~ Suzanne Wright

Bloated software causes IT stress farts. ~ Kevin Focke

I am happy everywhere except in places where I see glitz and rich farts. I am happiest in Brooklyn, where the concentration of rich farts is minimal. ~ Nassim Nicholas Taleb

Farts are just the ghosts of the things we ate. ~ Jane Austen

The smell of life." "The smell of farts. ~ Lev Grossman

If you eat Chinese food, your farts come out like Chinese food. If you eat Mexican food, your farts come out like Mexican food. And milk, it's like - you can smell the warmth in the fart. My wardrobe on Transformers always smells like farts, and I have no idea why. ~ Megan Fox

Girls are better at this sort of labour, often called 'emotional labour', not because there's anything in the meat and matter of our living cells that makes us naturally better but because we're trained for it from birth. Trained to make other people feel good. Trained to serve the coffee, fill in the forms, organise the parties and wipe the table afterwards. Trained to be feisty, if we must, but not strong. To be bubbly, not funny. You must at no stage appear to have a body that functions in a normal human way, that pisses and shits and sweats and farts and falters. Decorate the prison of your body. Make yourself useful. Shut up and smile. ~ Laurie Penny

Robert Plant asked me to marry him, but I said 'no.' I mean, you just don't want to marry someone you've wanted to do it with since you were thirteen, because, well, if he farts, I would, like, die! ~ Tori Amos

When the bishop farted we were amused to hear about it. Should the ploughboy find treasure we must be told. But when the ploughboy farts ... er ... keep it to yourself. ~ Kingsley Amis

... learning the knack of disconnecting her sense of smell, until she could switch it off like a radio and in the bland silence of its absence could drown in the sound of Nazarébaddoor's hypnotic voice without having her reverie interrupted by the scent of sheep shit or Nazarébaddoor's own frequent and extraordinary buffalo farts. ~ Salman Rushdie

The average pregnant woman farts 15 times that! ~ Jessica Simpson

I will never win an Oscar, and do you know why? First of all, because I'm not Jewish. Secondly, I make too much money for all those old farts in the Academy. ~ Clint Eastwood

No matter how politely one says it, we owe our existence to the farts of blue-green algae. ~ Diane Ackerman

There's a place for farts, and there's a place for sharts. ~ J.E. Haldeman

You're not crazy. And yes, cow farts chase the fog away. The only problem is the smell. ~ L.R.W. Lee

I swear, guys in groups are capable of the stupidest things."
"Like war," Kellan says, heaping napkins and ketchup packets onto her tray.
"And jumping off rooftops."
"And lighting their farts on fire," she says. ~ Jay Asher

I feel a tug in the air. The magic. When I look over, Felicity has her eyes closed in concentration, and a faint smile curves those full lips. Suddenly, Lady Denby breaks wind with an enormous crackling sound. There is no hiding the shock and horror on her face as she realizes what she's done. She breaks wind again, and several women clear their throats and look away as if they can pretend no to notice the offense. ~ Libba Bray

Ridge: Better. I can't hear my own farts, so sometimes I'll forget that other people can hear them. ~ Colleen Hoover

Uh-oh,' said Gazzy, but Angel was so nauseated she didn't have time to leap to a safe distance, or grab a gas mask
Bbbbbrrrrrrrttthhhhhhttttttt.
'Mother of God, no!' Total cried, doing a fast belly-crawl to the pool and throwing himself in. 'You said it wasn't your digestive system!'
'What was that?' Dylan asked. He winced and threw an arm oer his nose and mouth.
...
'Sorry,' Gazzy said miserably, but he couldn't help a tiny grin.
Nudge was clawing at a stack of towels to cover her face.
'Nice one, Gaz,' said Iggy.
...
'Wait-that was Gazzy? Is that why you call him ... Oh, crap,' Dylan said weakly. ~ James Patterson

Thanks for agreeing to watch Fat Rabbit. Hope you're prepared for lots of farts in your future. From the dog, of course. ~ Karina Halle

After fifteen years of making my living in stand-up, The Sarah Silverman Program has been a lesson in collaboration. Rob, Dan, and I live by the mantra "Whoever is most passionate." If I was mentoring someone, that's the Shandling-esque advice I would proffer: Find people you really respect and trust, and then at each decision, heed the most passionate voice. I love that because it eliminates nearly all struggle. And when you're doing a show that's mostly about farts, penises, and vaginas, there should be as little struggle as possible. ~ Sarah Silverman

The majority of these old farts are content to crash out in a drunken stupor on the backbenches. They just want to pick up their company directorships at £200,000 a year, claim for everything they ever spend personally on expenses and make sure not to rock the boat. I have better things to do with my time than to waste it by voting a different yarn-spinning joker-in-the-pack in. Whoever's in power is not going to affect me in any way. And if you believe otherwise then you can truly nail your colours to the mast of stupidity ~ Karl Wiggins

Did I not tell you earlier that a Jew is such a noble, precious jewel that God and all the angels dance when he farts? ~ Martin Luther

You're all mad for words. Words are just farts from a lot of fools who have swallowed too many books. Give me things! ~ Robertson Davies

Freedom, Truth, Honour - you could rattle off a hundred such words and behind every one of them would gather a thousand punks, pompous little farts, waving the banner with one hand and reaching under the table with the other. ~ Hunter S. Thompson

To give an extra dimension to the scolding she gave me: The word "twerp" was freshly coined in those days, and had a specific definition - it was a person, if I may be forgiven, who bit the bubbles of his own farts in a bathtub. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

My dad was proud of himself when he farted. He sounds like he's strangling a chicken when he farts. ~ Carl Barron

He knew he could never jingle change in his pocket or park his car like a confident adult, he was the Adrian he had always been, casting a guilty look over a furtive shoulder, living in eternal dread of a grown-up striding forward to clip his ear.
But there again, when he sipped at the whiskey his eyes failed to water and his throat forgot to burn. The body shamelessly welcomed what once it would have rejected. At breakfast he demanded not Ricicles and chocolate spread, but coffee and unbuttered toast. And if the coffee was sugared he leapt from it like a colt from an electric fence. He ate the crust and left the filling, guzzled the olives and spurned the cherries. Yet inside he remained the same Adrian who fought down the urge to stand and shout 'Bullocks' during church services, smelt his own farts and wasted hours skimming through National Geographic on the off-chance of seeing a few naked bodies. ~ Stephen Fry

I suppose that the main benefit of being rich (over just being independent) is to be able to despise rich people (a good concentration of whom you find in glitzy ski resorts) without any sour grapes. It is even sweeter when these farts don't know that you are richer than they are. ~ Nassim Nicholas Taleb

There's a Drunk Midget in My House
Ah, babies! They're more than just adorable little creatures on whom you can blame your farts. Like most people who have had one baby, I am an expert on everythiing and will tell you, unsolicited, how to raise your kid! ~ Tina Fey

Call me cynical, call me cold-hearted, but I don't believe in just knowing and love at first sight. I just don't believe that's love. Love is knowing someone's flaws, habits and pet peeves; having to deal with their grumbling after a bad day; the weird quirks that only surface after several months of being together; living with their morning breath and farts. It's not that gushy, obsessive, in-the-moment feeling. That's a crush. And sure, they can hurt, but you'll get over them. It's not destiny. ~ Emily May

In real life people fart, in the movies, people don't. Why not? Farts are a repressed minority. The mouth gets to say all kinds of things, but the other place is supposed to keep quiet. But maybe our lower colons have something interesting to say. Maybe we should listen to them. Farts are human, more human than a lot of people I know. I think we should bring them out of the water closet and into the parlor. ~ Mel Brooks

Although he, like all people, secretely enjoyed the smell of his own farts, the smell of his shit was somethig else. It was so bad as to seem evil in a moral way. ~ Jonathan Franzen

I like to keep in touch with younger photographers. It's important that a younger generation comes up and questions the assumptions made by old farts like me. ~ Martin Parr

What do we do if we come across trouble, sir?' Cahill asked, slapping at a fly. 'As much as I enjoy giving the rebel turds a walloping, it should be down to the Militia to keep the buggers in check.'
'They are doing their job,' Mullone said, glancing at a free-standing Celtic Cross that had once been a prominent feature beside the road, but was now strangled with weeds, besieged with dark moss and deeply pitted with age.
'If you call plundering, fighting and torture work, sir.'
'You don't have much faith in the peace talks then, Seán?'
'No, sir. There's more chance of me taking holy orders and becoming the Pope than there is of peace,' Cahill replied. 'The negotiations that spout from the politicians mouths are nothing but wet farts.'

-from Liberty or Death ~ David Cook

Males and farts. Any species, any planet, didn't matter. We ~ Ilona Andrews

And people still laugh about as much as they ever did, despite their shrunken brains. If a bunch of them are lying around on a beach, and one of them farts, everybody else laughs and laughs, just as people would have done a million years ago. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

He's a murdering chud," Zil was yelling.
"What do you want to do? Lynch him?" Astrid demanded.
That stopped the flow for a second as kids tried to figure out what "lynch" meant. But Zil quickly recovered.
"I saw him do it. He used his powers to kill Harry."
"I was trying to stop you from smashing my head in!" Hunter shouted.
"You're a lying mutant freak!"
"They think they can do anything they want," another voice shouted.
Astrid said, as calmly as she could while still pitching her voice to be heard, "We are not going down that path, people, dividing up between freaks and normals."
"They already did it!" Zil cried. "It's the freaks acting all special and like their farts don't stink."
That earned a laugh.
"And now they're starting to kill us," Zil cried.
Angry cheers.
Edilio squared his shoulders and stepped into the crowd. He went first to Hank, the kid with the shotgun. He tapped him on the shoulder and said, "Give me that thing."
"No way," Hank said. But he didn't seem too certain.
"You want to have that thing fire by accident and blow someone's face off?" Edilio held his hand out. "Give it to me, man."
Zil rounded on Edilio. "You going to make Hunter give up his weapon? Huh? He's got powers, man, and that's okay, but the normals can't have any weapon? How are we supposed to defend ourselves from the freaks?"
"Man, give it a rest, huh?" Edilio said. He was doing his best to sound more weary tha ~ Michael Grant

I lent my ear to the patient's lips - so close that I could feel his fetid, warm breath on my skin. "Can you tell me where I can find Señora Jucinta Coronado?" I asked for the last time. I was afraid he'd bite me. Instead he emitted a violently loud fart. His companions burst out laughing and clapped with joy. I took a few steps back, but it was too late: the flatulent vapours had hit me. It was then that I noticed, close to me, an old man, all hunched up, with a prophet's beard, thin hair, and fiery eyes, who was leaning on a walking stick and gazing at the others with disdain.

"You're wasting your time, young man. Juanito only knows how to let off farts, and the others can only laugh and smell them. As you see, the social structure here isn't very different from that of the outside world. ~ Carlos Ruiz Zafon

Kids are like farts in that way. They never seem to bother the owner as much as they bother everyone else. ~ Karl Pilkington

Most people enjoy the sight of their own handwriting as they enjoy the smell of their own farts. ~ W. H. Auden

They glanced around at each other almost furtively, embarrassed, as Americans always seem to be, by the raw fact of their own success - as if cash were hardcooked eggs and affluence the farts that inevitably follow an overdose of same. ~ Stephen King

If Joanie dies before me, I wonder if I'll ever be with another woman. I can't imagine going through all of the preliminary stuff - the talk, the chatter, the dinners. I'd have to take someone places, explain my history, make jokes, dole out compliments, hold back farts. ~ Kaui Hart Hemmings

I have a playlist of farts on my phone. ~ Lena Headey

Farts come from no
one and nowhere; they are anonymous emanations that belong
to the group as a whole, and even when every person in the
room can point to the culprit, the only sane course of action is
denial. ~ Paul Auster

Farts demand to be passed," Augustus said, which was a line from A Posterior Affliction. ~ Adam Aarons

My sweet little whorish Nora I did as you told me, you dirty little girl, and pulled myself off twice when I read your letter. I am delighted to see that you do like being fucked arseways. Yes, now I can remember that night when I fucked you for so long backwards. It was the dirtiest fucking I ever gave you, darling. My prick was stuck in you for hours, fucking in and out under your upturned rump. I felt your fat sweaty buttocks under my belly and saw your flushed face and mad eyes. At every fuck I gave you your shameless tongue came bursting out through your lips and if a gave you a bigger stronger fuck than usual, fat dirty farts came spluttering out of your backside. You had an arse full of farts that night, darling, and I fucked them out of you, big fat fellows, long windy ones, quick little merry cracks and a lot of tiny little naughty farties ending in a long gush from your hole. It is wonderful to fuck a farting woman when every fuck drives one out of her. I think I would know Nora's fart anywhere. I think I could pick hers out in a roomful of farting women. It is a rather girlish noise not like the wet windy fart which I imagine fat wives have. It is sudden and dry and dirty like what a bold girl would let off in fun in a school dormitory at night. I hope Nora will let off no end of her farts in my face so that I may know their smell also.

You say when I go back you will suck me off and you want me to lick your cunt, you little depraved blackguard. I hope y ~ James Joyce