Stupid Funny Love Quotes

If I stand here, I can see the Little Red Haired girl when she comes out of her house ... Of course, if she sees me peeking around this tree, she'll think I'm the dumbest person in the world ... But if I don't peek around the tree, I'll never see her ... Which means I probably AM the dumbest person in the world ... which explains why I'm standing in a batch of poison oak. ~ Charles M. Schulz

It may sound funny, but I love the South. I don't choose to live anywhere else. There's land here, where a man can raise cattle, and I'm going to do it some day. ~ Medgar Evers

The most important things are the hardest to say. They are the things you get ashamed of, because words diminish them
words shrink things that seemed limitless when they were in your head to no more than living size when they're brought out. But it's more than that, isn't it? The most important things lie too close to wherever your secret heart is buried, like landmarks to a treasure your enemies would love to steal away. And you may make revelations that cost you dearly only to have people look at you in a funny way, not understanding what you've said at all, or why you thought it was so important that you almost cried while you were saying it. That's the worst, I think. When the secret stays locked within not for want of a teller but for want of an understanding ear. ~ Stephen King

There are all different kinds of smut," Pandora said, warming to the subject. "Smut balls, loose smut, stinking smut - "
"Pandora," West interrupted in an undertone, "for the love of mercy, stop saying that word in public. ~ Lisa Kleypas

Money can't buy you love, but it can get you some really good chocolate ginger biscuits. ~ Dylan Moran

A kiss is a lovely trick to stop speech. ~ Ingrid Bergman

You're thoughtful, Barbara, but you're not open. You're passionate, but you're hard. You're a good, decent, funny, wonderful woman, and I love you, but you're a pain in the ass. ~ Tracy Letts

I think we can all agree that sleeping around is a great way to meet people. ~ Chelsea Handler

...so much has been laid on the sunset - heavy-handed metaphors, sentimental music. Everyone's always walking into them, and that is some very intense light. Maybe that's where the term "love is blind" comes from, because so many people are walking into sunsets, burning out their corneas. ~ Kirk Farber

Where does love reveal itself? In beds, sofas, bathtubs – each section of a department store has its advantages. ~ Bauvard

Go to the cops then!" I shout. "But mind if I ask what you plan on telling them? Because saying two dead teenagers came to you in the middle of the night and told you something or someone is going to kill you is only going to get you locked in a cozy, padded cell."
"Well, it has to be better than spending another second with you."
"Make sure they put that on your headstone, will you? Right below 'Here lies Benedict Bartholomew Ford. He had no friends and a really stupid name'. ~ Rebecca Harris

Love such a funny word; a worse emotion. It's crazy because it has the ability to give you strength, happiness and mostly belief. At the same time this thing call love can turn you bitter, insecure and allow you to lose sight of who you are in that same moment. ~ Mz. Baltimore

You are dear to yourself in the morning and it is the morning now. It is very private to have such a love for yourself. Closer, closer to the curtain. How funny, your face is right right against the curtain now. How funny to know what side of it you are on! You are asleep! How wonderful to pay attention. ~ Jenny Slate

We love super-silly moments, funny moments, serious moments, weird moments. ~ Riki Lindhome

We were always eating expired things. Milk, bread, biscuits, cake. We forgot about them as they sat around the house and just as they had gone bad, we put them in our mouths. Chocolates I brought back with me from Australia, cheeses in last year's Christmas hamper, juice from the last time someone decided to go grocery shopping. We didn't always realize they tasted funny – not everything curdles and a two-month-old orange can be just as sweet. When we did, it was usually too late. Sometimes it wasn't. We finished what we had started anyway. ~ Cheryl Julia Lee

Lish tried to swear
which is always funny, because the computer won't translate it. It went something like this: Bleep stupid bleep bleep faeries and their bleep bleep bleep obsessions. He had better stop bleep bleep bleep the bleep bleep rules or I will bleep bleep bleep the little bleeeeeeeeeeep. ~ Kiersten White

Just kissing? How quicky you dismiss our love. -Jace ~ Cassandra Clare

The three ingredients of a successful union between two ... humor, commitment & undying love. ~ Bill Cosby

Love is the only antidote for the insanity of this world. And the funny thing about love is that when someone loves you, it doesn't necessarily make you feel better; but when you love someone else, it does. ~ Frederick Lenz

I've seen all the Judd Apatow movies, and I'd love to have a really funny little part in one of them some day. ~ Miranda Cosgrove

I took 'P.S. I Love You' thinking it was going to be a little funny, and I ended up crying every day on that film. ~ Hilary Swank

Men would like monogamy better if it sounded less like monotony. ~ Rita Rudner

And then I met a woman,
now comes the funny part;
with eyes that petrified my brain
and sunk into my heart. ~ Hugh Antoine D'Arcy

A man loses his sense of direction after four drinks; a woman loses hers after four kisses. ~ H.L. Mencken

Because I kissed you? Seriously? You only like me because I'm a good kisser? That's it. We're not doing this. I'm not letting you risk your life just
because you can't think with your upstairs brain."
"No, you twit." Ryan laughed. "Because you kissed me that day. I expected the ice queen and got a funny, go-with-the-flow girl that didn't care what
anyone thought about her. A girl willing to stir up gossip just so that I could win a date with someone else.
"You didn't have to help me. In fact, you probably should have been insulted, but you weren't.
You kissed me, you smiled, and then you wished me good luck. No one's ever surprised me like that. I couldn't figure out why you did it, and I just
had to get to know you after that." I had no idea that stupid kiss had that kind of effect on him. Charged him up like a battery, sure, but do all that? All
this time I really thought it was just the superkissing that kept him coming back. I looked down at my lunch, feeling a little ashamed of my lack of faith
in him, but Ryan couldn't stop there.
Oh, no, not Ryan Miller.
"After that day, every time I was with you I got brief glimpses of the real Jamie, the one who is dying to break out, and she was this fun, relaxed,
smart, funny, caring girl. Finding out the truth about you only made you that much more incredible. You're so strong. You've gone through so much,
you're going through so much, but you never stop trying. You're am ~ Kelly Oram

I liked my face. Ethan liked my face. A lot of people liked my face. Besides, makeup was really just glorified face paint. ~ D.A. Paul

I want to let my fans know I love them and I'm coming your way and I'm bringing truckloads of funny. ~ Tracy Morgan

If we all learnt cat-speak, we would often find they are saying, "You stupid human, I am trying to tell you something important right now! ~ Leah Broadby

Tex looked at Duke "She's got spunk," he said.
"Where I come from, we call it sass," Duke replied.
"Where I come from, we call it attitude," Smithie put in.
"Oh for the love of God, whatever you call
it, are you in or are you out?" Jules clipped. ~ Kristen Ashley

One of the nice things about having a lover, it makes you think about everything anew. The rest of your life becomes a kind of movie, flat and even rather funny. ~ John Updike

I think Amy Poehler and Tina Fey have done so much for women in comedy in the sense that they've normalized it. You don't think, 'I'm going to watch that comedy starring a woman,' you think, 'I'm going to watch that funny show.' They refuse to play the foils for men, or be reduced to the butt of every joke, and I love that about both of them. ~ Tatiana Maslany

All of my books have an element of a man who is in love with somebody and needs them desperately, not just for procreation but for being able to fully unbosom himself. He only feels comfortable discussing things with women. Which is funny, because 80 percent of readers are women! ~ Gary Shteyngart

Yes, it's funny, isn't it? You try to do what's best for the people you love, and you just end up in trouble for your efforts. ~ Kirsten Miller

I want a man who's kind and understanding. Is that too much to ask of a millionaire? ~ Zsa Zsa Gabor

Well, first I tried just telling her the truth. That if you kiss her, you'll die. She started crying hysterically."
"Oh, good thinking," I say, lifting the cup of hot chocolate to my mouth. Why hadn't I thought of that right off?
"Yeeeah, turns out not so much. I thought that might have worked since, you know, she's supposedly in love with you, but then being a total psychopath and all, she started blubbering, 'I'd rather have one perfect passionate kiss with Haden and lose him forever, than to have never kissed him at all.'"
I almost choke on a sip of hot chocolate. It burns my throat. ~ Bree Despain