Spikehorn Menu Quotes

My lady, would you care to inspect the menu for dinner? Cook is doing her best to accommodate on such short notice. I believe she plans to serve chicken this evening."
"Oh, actually, chicken will do very well for his lordship, but I shall require a dish without meat."
"Without meat?" the woman repeated, looking even more pinched. "Such as, may I inquire?"
"Vegetables, bread, noodles, soup made without meat stock, cheese, milk, fruit. Anything, really, so long as it is not made from killed meat. ~ Tracy Anne Warren

In northwest Seattle, there is an immensely popular 'old-fashioned' ice cream parlor. It is modern, spotless, and gleaming, bursting with comfortable looking people on a warm summer evening. The parlor is dedicated to nostalgia, from the old-time decor to the striped candy, the ragtime music, the costumes of the smiling young waiters, the Gibson-girl menu with its gold-rush type, and the open-handed hospitality of the Old West. It serves sandwiches, hamburgers, and kiddie 'samiches,' but its specialty is ice-cream concoctions, all of them with special names, including several so vast and elaborate that they cost several dollars and arrive with so much fanfare that all other activities stop as the waiters join in a procession as guards of honor. Nobody seems to care that the sandwiches and even the ice cream dishes have a curious blandness, so that everything tastes rather alike and it is hard to remember what one has eaten. Nothing mars the insistent, bright, wholesome good humor that presses on every side. Yet somehow there is pathos as well. For these patrons are the descendants of pioneers, of people who knew the frontiers, of men who dared the hardships of Chilkoot Pass to seek gold in the Klondike. That is their heritage, but now they only sit amid a sterile model of the past, spooning ice cream while piped-in ragtime tinkles unheard. ~ Charles A. Reich

Which is the main reason I refuse to let Isaac drag me out tonight for another one of his disastrous fix-ups.
There's another reason I don't like to date - but I'm trying not to think about her.
"Come on, man," Isaac whines. It's the third time he's called me in twenty minutes. "I promise it won't be like last time."
By "last time" he means when he hooked me up with Stacey Perkins. Apparently she's a vegan - which is cool. Her choice. But nobody told me until after I brought her to Outback Steakhouse. Then she asked the waitress if they had any "cruelty free" items on the menu.
Things only went downhill from there. Especially when I still ordered a steak. There are few things worse than an irritated vegan. ~ Shannon Messenger

Muy Peligroso!" Bernie's choices had become as limited as the Taco Bell menu. Reason and blood had left the building, heading south, faster than reprobates to Florida." - Shark Fin Soup 2015 ~ Fred Barnett

I knew him well enough to know romance was simply not on the menu for him. He was as emotionally available as a jackhammer.

This was pure lust, exploding after a decade of simmering quietly, brewed by frustration, jealousy, and hate. ~ L.J. Shen

It all comes down to Jesus Christ, and what you CHOOSE to believe about Him. Jesus claims He is the Son of God. Jesus claims He died for you and rose from the dead. He claims that the only way to cancel out your sin and spend eternity in heaven is to be believe that He is who He said He was. These are the claims on the table. Bold claims. its will make you wince, won't it?
Personally, I think the boldness of the claims makes the choosing a lot easier. Most people who have never actually read the menu probably assume they can order a la carte at the Jesus table or customize their own recipe of faith. But you can't say yes to the historical figure and a few parables but pass on miracles, the resurrection, and the Son-of-God thing. That is not the offering. Christ is a fixed meal. It is all or nothing with His claims. Everyone is invited, but only you can decide if you actually want to eat at His table. For those who do believe in Christ, it means getting real, being hones about your sin, and living your life as if you really mean it. ~ Carolyn Weber

The menu de degustation is the finest expression of avant-garde cooking. ~ Ferran Adria

Did I really travel ten thousand miles to watch a naked girl read a menu? Yes, I supposed I had. This is the difference between sexual fantasy and sexual reality, ~ Dana Aaron Mather

Fashion is like eating. You shoudn't stick with the same menu. ~ Kenzo Takada

When I was in Turks & Caicos, a bug jumped out of my room service menu. That kind of freaked me out. ~ Jacquelyn Jablonski

If you eat a lot of starchy foods, introduce a vegetable once a week, then twice a week, and then three times a week. Slowly fill your diet with new flavors. By the time you're ready to let go of whatever it is you want to let go of, you've got a full menu. ~ Lisa Edelstein

15-Day Tear-Out Menu Plan ~ Ani Phyo

... to me, a restaurant with no menu, headed by a chef I trusted, would be ideal. In such a utopia, guests could specify deathly allergies, hunger level, and time constraints, but then they would unfurl their napkin and surrender". ~ Phoebe Damrosch

We're compensated metaphysically with the absolute freedom to define and pursue whatever it is we believe will make our lives worthwhile- a dubious birthright that imparts a wearisome burden of its own. Rather like choosing one all-important meal from an infinite menu. ~ Chris Chester

What are you going to have?" he asked.
"A nervous breakdown," she muttered and opened her menu.
So we'll tell the waitress to make that a double, he thought. ~ Jessica Bird

I was sitting on my own in a restaurant, when I saw a beautiful woman at another table. I sent her a bottle of the most expensive wine on the menu. She sent me a note:
"I will not touch a drop of this wine unless you can assure me that you have seven inches in your pants." So I wrote back: "Give me the wine. As gorgeous as you are, I'm not cutting off three inches for anyone. ~ Akhil

In Spain, you can go into any tapas bar, and you'll see anchovies all over the menu. ~ Jose Andres

A rich and varied menu is for people who have no work to do. ~ Roald Amundsen

One day, everyone stopped over-thinking. We started thinking just as much as we should, and not any more than necessary. There was no more misunderstandings whatsoever. Minor disagreements were forgotten, not turned into proof of larger things. Trivial errors of speech or judgement were just as important as items on the breakfast menu: you chose waffles and I chose eggs and it was a god damn miracle. ~ Amelia Gray

Before he could even introduce himself I asked about the cocktail menu. If I was going to sit through this lunch, I was going to need some help. ~ Adriane Leigh

I was a little stunned that we didn't get a coloring book with this menu. ~ Nick Faldo

There are so many varieties of love - The Menu does not have just one flavor - and I see no reason why this can't be one of them. love can be anything you choose to wrap around the word, as long as the two people involved agree upon terms. ~ Janelle Brown

The best meal at my restaurant is the whole right side of the menu. ~ Junior Seau

I don't think we can do that."
"At these prices you should bring the cow out and have a ritual sacrifice at
the table. Just do it." I handed him the menu. He took it. ~ Laurell K. Hamilton

So, what do you go for in a girl?"
He crows, lifting a lager to his lips
Gestures where his mate sits
Downs his glass
"He prefers tits I prefer ass. What do you go for in a girl?"
I don't feel comfortable
The air left the room a long time ago
All eyes are on me
Well, if you must know I want a girl who reads
Yeah. Reads.
I'm not trying to call you a chauvinist
Cos I know you're not alone in this but…
I want a girl who reads
Who needs the written word & uses the added vocabulary
She gleans from novels and poetry
To hold lively conversation In a range of social situations
I want a girl who reads
Who's heart bleeds at the words of Graham Greene Or even Heat magazine
Who'll tie back her hair while reading Jane Eyre
And goes cover to cover with each water stones three for two offer but
I want a girl who doesn't stop there
I want a girl who reads
Who feeds her addiction for fiction
With unusual poems and plays
That she hunts out in crooked bookshops for days and days and days
She'll sit addicted at breakfast, soaking up the back of the cornflakes box
And the information she gets from what she reads makes her a total fox
Cos she's interesting & unique & her theories make me go weak at the knees
I want a girl who reads
A girl who's eyes will analyze
The menu over dinner
Who'll use what she learn ~ Mark Grist

Have you ever noticed that the children's menu is exactly the same as the bar menu? Burger, hot dog, pizza. If you put the children's menu at the bar, people wouldn't even notice. Oh, cool. I can color in an airplane while I drink this beer and wait for my chicken strips. ~ Jim Gaffigan

the best choice we have on the menu tonight. ~ David Vann

he invited Sylvia to dine with him somewhere where they were going to have something fabulous and very nasty at about two guineas the ounce on the menu. Something like that! And during dinner Sir John had entertained her by singing the praises of her husband. He said that Tietjens was much too great a gentleman to be wasted on the old-furniture trade: that was why he hadn't persisted. But he sent by Sylvia a message to the effect that if ever Tietjens did come to be in want of money . . . Occasionally Sylvia was worried ~ Ford Madox Ford

I'll be busy for the next eight weeks, so let's set this for November 15th.
MENU
I want lamb or venison steak. Baked potatoes with honey butter. Corn on the cob. Rolls. And apple pie, like the one you made before. I really liked it. I want it with ice cream.
You owe me one naked dinner, but I'm not a complete beast, so you can wear a bra and panties if you so wish. The blue ones with the bow will do.
Curran,
Beast Lord of Atlanta ~ Ilona Andrews

She took off her red pants, the shade of ketchup, to reveal softly tanned legs, like two French fries. But when she brought up price, I knew she was too good to be true. She was definitely NOT off the dollar menu. ~ Jarod Kintz

Today I say am an addict. A respectable addict, of course. Not like the desperate addicts who have cashed in their mortgage... After all, my drug is cheap, the cheapest of all drugs, and therefore the most pernicious... And my drug is everywhere I look: in the drive-through gas station's convenience store, in the supermarket, on the lusciously displayed menu of an exclusive restaurant. ~ Vera Tarman

As soon as she was ready for work, she called out to Eric's closed door. "Anything in particular you want for breakfast?"
"Yeah," he said, heading for the door. "But I don't think it's on the menu. ~ Terry Spear

I can't go to a restaurant and order food because I keep looking at the fonts on the menu. ~ Donald Knuth

And can you get this girl something with a laxative effect?" I add to the waitress, refusing to spare Sophie a glance as I slide my menu back into place. "My treat. I just can't stand to see someone so full of shit, you know? Especially when her boyfriend keeps feeding her more of it. ~ Dahlia Adler

Another of the great civilizations, the Aztecs, raised a breed of hairless chihuahuas especially for eating. When the Conquistadors arrived and found dog on the menu, they were of the same opinion as Mademoiselle, that this was evidence of the worst form of barbarism. They, the Spaniards, used dogs as befits civilized and Christian men - to hunt down fugitive Indians and tear them to pieces. ~ Medlar Lucan

She hadn't gotten his expression quite right in her imagination, because the stunned, vacant expression on Shane's face when she started down the stairs was even better than fantasy. His mouth actually dropped open. Next to him, Michael turned around, and although she hadn't counted on it, there was a warm fuzzy to making a hot golden-angel vampire blink and give her a quick, involuntary once-over.
Claire stopped on the steps above them and did a tentative hip-shimmy. "Okay?" she asked. Shane's mouth shut with a snap, and Michael actually cleared his throat.
"Fine," Michael said.
"Fine?" That was Eve, coming down the stairs behind Claire. She moved around the roadblock and punched Michael in the arm. "She looks amazing. I'm not half g*y and I think she's hot."
Shane wasn't saying anything. Claire felt warm and a little dizzy, the way he was looking at her. She resisted the urge to check to see if her skirt was straight -- she'd done it a dozen times already --and forced herself to meet his gaze and smile.
"You sure this is smart?" Shane asked, which was not what she'd expected, not at all. "You look fantastic."
"Thanks -- "
He interrupted her. "Fantastic in this town pops you to the top of the take-out menu."
She held up her left hand and pointed to her wrist. The gold bracelet was clearly visible. "I'll be okay," she said. "The vamps won't bother me."
"Not even talking about the vamps. You're going to be drawing every guy there wh ~ Rachel Caine

I hope God speaks English. If I get up to heaven and have to point at a menu, I'm gonna be pissed. ~ Daniel Tosh

Flops are a part of life's menu and I've never been a girl to miss out on any of the courses. ~ Rosalind Russell

After my second, I started working with a nutritionist who specializes in post-baby weight loss. It's called Simply Beautiful Mom. I'm in restaurants all the time because of work, and she actually will look at menus online before I go and she says, 'These are the three things you're allowed to order. Don't even open a menu.' ~ Lauren Weisberger

The golden rule when reading the menu is, if you cannot pronounce it, you cannot afford it. ~ Frank Muir

Selective Biblical quotation is a favorite of leftists who interpret the Bible the same way they do the Constitution: as a Chinese menu designed to allow picking and choosing. That's because when many Democrats take the Bible as a whole, they realize how much they despise it. ~ Ben Shapiro

Afterwards, we don't head straight back to work. Instead, we stop at McDonald's. Kristy gets a Happy Meal. Cora gets like four pies, which doesn't exactly seem like a healthy, balanced meal to me, but she's not exactly a healthy, balanced young lady. I get a couple of Big Macs and some fries. Arthur stares at the menu the way a time-traveling seventeenth century Puritan would watch a Lady Gaga music video. ~ Hannah Johnson

Anything good on the trucks?"
"Some beautiful lake salmon, fresh asparagus, and new potatoes."
"New enough their skin is peeling?"
"Yes."
"I know what we're going to do today!" Lou felt the excitement surge. This was why she loved cooking: getting amazing fresh ingredients and making something extraordinary. Luella's traditional French menu didn't leave much room for creativity, so the daily special had become Lou's canvas, where she was limited only by her imagination and whims.
"We'll keep it a simple spring dinner. Roast the potatoes in butter, salt, and pepper. Maybe some thyme or tarragon, too. We'll top the salmon fillets with hollandaise and roast the asparagus. ~ Amy E. Reichert

You know you're a chemist when you expect your washing machine not just to have "spin" but to have "lock and shim" as well. And when your clothes don't come out clean you wonder if it's because you chose the wrong solvent from the menu or something, or maybe it ran out of N2. Or if the machine was tuned to "pants" rather than "socks" nucleus. And then you think "I'll submit it for service ~ Lukasz Pilarski

Our clients wanted the restaurant experience, not their mother's buffet dinner - so we reached out to that world and hired a series of restaurant chefs: Robb Garceau from Jean Georges, Cornelius Gallagher from Oceana. Cornelius completely revolutionized our menu; he did a stint at El Bulli, and one of the techniques he brought back was sous-vide cooking. Our current chef, Patrick Phelan, continues to grow the vision. ~ David Castle

I think of music as a menu. I can't eat the same thing every day. ~ Carlos Santana

In the OASIS, you got used to seeing freakishly beautiful faces on everyone. But Art3mis's features didn't look as though they'd been selected from a beauty drop-down menu on some avatar creation template. Her face had the distinctive look of a real person's, as if her true features had been scanned in and mapped onto her avatar. Big hazel eyes, rounded cheekbones, a pointy chin, and a perpetual smirk. I found her unbearably attractive. Art3mis's body was also somewhat unusual. In the OASIS, you usually saw one of two body shapes on female avatars: the absurdly thin yet wildly popular supermodel frame, or the top-heavy, wasp-waisted porn starlet physique (which looked even less natural in the OASIS than it did in the real world). But Art3mis's frame was short and Rubenesque. All curves. ~ Ernest Cline

The proper place to eat lobster ... is in a lobster shack as close to the sea as possible. There is no menu card because there is nothing else to eat except boiled lobster with melted butter. ~ Pearl S. Buck

Now I'm not saying the act of going to church fixes everything. Just as simply looking at a restaurant menu won't give you nourishment. We've got to engage with what's offered if it's going to do us any good. But putting my heart in a place to receive truth certainly got me going in a different direction. ~ Lysa TerKeurst