Funny Sibling Quotes

There's no better friend than a sister ... ~ Mary Engelbreit

We're getting the blues about having to walk away from this whole thing. We enjoyed it a lot and it all felt good. We had a good experience on it. We thought we could do good work together. And it is unusual to get the next one, straight off the bed. John is funny. When he gets moving, he moves pretty quickly. ~ Brendan Gleeson

Given the current state of publishing, I think it helps to have a brand name on the cover of your book. Comedians are proven commodities with built-in audiences. They may not have the writing chops of a Dave Eggers, but they're salacious and funny and self-reflective. ~ Michael Showalter

Plagiarism is not only wrong, it's spelled funny, okay. ~ Pepe The King Prawn

I cupped her chin and tilted it back, deepening the kiss, wanting to somehow claim her very soul. Funny thing was, it was my soul that was being claimed, my breath that was being stolen, and my heart that was pounding crazy fast in my chest. ~ Jennifer L. Armentrout

Lunch makes me feel a bit better. ~ Suzanne Collins

Here's a funny question:
What is your favorite word?
Think about it - maybe it's a word that makes you absolutely happy, or a word that sounds gloriously beautiful, or a word that evokes awe and wonder. Maybe you are reminded of a great time when you hear it, or maybe it represents your life's dream.
So, what is it? What is your favorite word of all words?
Thought about it yet?
Good.
And now, think why. ~ Vera Nazarian

This many pretty girls in the room, all watching you boys like you're a wedding-reception one-night stand waiting to happen - ~ Cristin Harber

That old if you 'need anything, let me know,' is a total crock. You hear people say it all the time, but you never see anyone actually call up the person who said it and say, "Hey, remember when you said to let you know if i needed anything? Well, I'm feeling really overwhelmed. Could you please come clean my kitchen, I'd feel like I had a bit of a head start." You will never hear someone say that, because then the person asking the other person to clean their kitchen is seen as a helpless, incompetent dick. -Diana Rowland (My life as a white trash zombie) ~ Diana Rowland

The taste of death is upon my lips. I feel something that is not of this earth. ~ Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart

The prince set her down and dismissed his valet. The latter left with a bow and closed the door. Leaning against the wall, the prince pulled off his stockings. As he walked toward the amethyst tub, he yanked his shirt over his head.
He was lean and tightly sinewed. Her little bird heart thudded.
He glanced at her, his lips curved in not quite a smile. The next thing she knew, his shirt had flown through the air and landed on the cage, blocking her view toward the bathtub.
"Sorry, sweetheart. I am shy."
She chirped indignantly. It was not as if she would have continued to watch him disrobe beyond a certain point. ~ Sherry Thomas

That's right, you get him, Mary. Don't let him change the subject! ~ Alexandra Bracken

Love is a state of mind which has nothing to do with the mind. ~ Bob Phillips

I don't like big feet. It reminds me of gammon. ~ Steve Coogan

Business is the most exciting game. ~ Max Aitken, Lord Beaverbrook

I'm used to the security of living behind my online profiles and the clip art advertisdements I create to define me. I can be whoever I want to be in that world. I can be funny, deep, pensive, eccentric. I can be the best version of myself. I can make all the right decisions. I can delete my flaws by pressing a button.
In the real world anything can happen. It's like stepping onto an icy surface
you have to adjust your footing or you'll slip and fall. Your movements become rigid and unsure because behind all the fancy gadgets and all that digital armor, you realize you're just flesh and bones. ~ Katie Kacvinsky

You will not kill my girlfriend today, International Terrorists of Ambiguous Nationality! ~ John Green

The hugely popular Windows 95 operating system revolutionized the software world thanks to its capability of accomplishing the seemingly impossible task of making Bill Gates even richer than he already was. ~ Dave Barry

It's funny whom we end up choosing to love and who ends up choosing to love us. It's rarely the people we think it should be. ~ Robin Jones Gunn

What is serious in laughing, worrying, grieving, mourning, concerning about anything which is temporary? Well, it is funny, actually, when you know life isn't immortal. ~ Bhavik Sarkhedi

A friendship counting nearly forty years is the finest kind of shade-tree I know. ~ James Russell Lowell

Falling in love and falling to your death feel about the same, I thought. And I almost laughed. ~ Shannon Hale

There's nothing funny about war. Well, aside from this joke Orafoura told me: What did WWI say to WWII? I wish I could tell you the punch line, but the restaurant was so noisy that I didn't hear it. But I laughed anyway, because I'll bet it was pretty funny. ~ Jarod Kintz

It's funny how a hello is always accompanied with a goodbye. It's funny how good memories can make you cry, it's funny how forever never seems to last, it's funny how much you would lose if you forgot about your past, it's funny how friends can just leave when you're down, it's funny how when you need someone they never are around, it's funny how people change and think they're so much better, it's funny how some many lies are packed into one love letter, it's funny how one night can hold so much regret, it's funny how you can forgive but not forget, it's funny how ironic life turns out to be, but the funniest part of all, is that none of that is funny to me. ~ Auliq Ice

Daryl Dixon: You got some balls for a Chinaman.
Glenn: I'm Korean.
Daryl Dixon: Whatever. ~ The Walking Dead

Trailing 5-1, the Padres added an insurance run in the eighth inning. ~ Jerry Coleman

Cockblocked by the phone. Wanna bet it's Focus On The Family or some Satanic organization like? ~ Andrea Speed

Bricks are independent but can work well with other, tough to crack, fiercely loyal and put in the right spot will hold anything and everything that you've ever held dear with the greatest of ease. ~ Nicole McKay

I know from the middle distance I give off the look of being prolific, which is a funny compliment to receive. ~ Joseph Epstein

Retiring was scary and it was tough to give up gymnastics, but so many great opportunities have come from it that I never expected. ~ Shawn Johnson

Thanks liver... you are a champ! ~ Siddhant R. Shinde

I love people; it's mankind I can't stand. ~ Charles M. Schulz

All the things I thought I was - simple and plain and sometime funny - are very small words. They do not begin to describe me. They do not begin to express what is inside of me. I have value, and I have worth. I cannot be replaced like old shoes or taken for granted like tap water. ~ Adriana Trigiani

Hey, guys, I'm going to change," Tony announced. "You all need to get out of here for a little bit." "So fucking change. You change in the locker room all the time-what's the bug deal?" Slade asked. Tony groaned and his eyes narrowed at Slade. "Oh. Gotcha!" Slade turned and announced, "Everybody ... ~ Sidney Halston

Every big dream begins with a little nap. ~ Yohann Dafeu

Donna: You're not saying much.
The Doctor: No, it's just - It's a funny old life. In the TARDIS.
Donna: You don't want me.
The Doctor: I'm not saying that.
Donna: But you asked me. would you rather be on your own?
The Doctor: No. Actually no. But. The last time, with Martha - like I said, it got complicated. And that was all my fault. I just want a mate.
Donna: You just want to mate?!
The Doctor: I just want a mate.
Donna: Well you're not mating with me, sunshine!
The Doctor: A mate! I just want a mate.
Donna: Well it's just as well, because I'm not having any of that nonense. I mean you're just a long streak of ... nothing! Alien nothing.
The Doctor: There we are then. ~ Russell T. Davies

You're flying Buzz! No Woody we're falling in style! ~ Walt Disney Company

Mumps, measles, and puppy love are terrible after twenty. ~ Mignon McLaughlin

Daemon!" Dee called from the kitchen. "I need your help!"
"We should go see what she's doing before she destroys your kitchen." He rubbed his hands down his face. "It's possible. ~ Jennifer L. Armentrout

It's funny how the colors of the real world only seem really real when you watch them on a screen. ~ Anthony Burgess

Suddenly it seemed to me that I looked back from a great distance on that smile and saw it all again - the smile and the day, the whole sunny, sad, funny, wonderful day and all the days that we had spent here together. What was I going to do when such days came no more? There could not be many; for we were a family growing old. And how would I learn to live without these people? I who needed them so little that I could stay away all year - what should I do without them? ~ Jetta Carleton

Losing a sibling, especially in youth, is a particular blow, a lateral loss of shared history and DNA that lacerates your identity. Your old narrative is shattered. Your new narrative becomes shapeless, full of confusion and pain. Double that. ~ Ann Gisleson

I went to the park and saw this kid flying a kite. The kid was really excited. I don't know why, that's what they're supposed to do. Now if he had had a chair on the other end of that string, I would have been impressed. ~ Mitch Hedberg

You know, I think some people fear that if they like the wrong kind of book, it will reflect poorly on them. It can go with genre, too. Somebody will say, "I won't read science fiction, or I won't read young adult novels" - all of those genres can become prisons. I always find it funny when the serious literary world will make a little crack in its wall and allow in one pet genre writer and crown them and say, "Well Elmore Leonard is actually a real writer." Or "Stephen King is actually a really good writer." Generally speaking, you know you're being patronized when somebody uses the word "actually ~ Elizabeth Gilbert

On a crowded bus in Israel, a mother was speaking to her son in Yiddish. An Israeli woman reprimanded her. "You should be speaking Hebrew. Why are you talking to him in Yiddish?" The mother answered, "I don't want he should forget he's a Jew." ~ Kirk Douglas

A few minutes later, a tall, bronze-skinned woman with masses of dark hair, eyes like pale emeralds, and more curves than the Nürburgring racetrack appeared next to my table. My SEAL stood and started to intervene, but I held up a lazy hand, gave a droopy-eyed smile, slurred my words, and waved him off. The stripper sat on my lap with nothing between her and the Lord but a smile and three pieces of strategically placed duct tape. She slipped a glittering arm around my shoulders - she apparently was wearing lotion with metal flakes in it and it felt rough. Then she leaned her décolletage my way, placing her head next to my ear. "You know what you're supposed to do, right?" she whispered, smiling and acting like she had just said something terribly wrong. She was a good actress for Elizabeth City.
Laughing, smiling, and acting wasted, I slurred as loudly and obnoxiously as I could, "Oh, I know exactly what I'm doing, woman!" With that, I reached up and placed my hand on her massive breast, just as I'd been instructed to do - all for the good of my country.
The slap that followed could[…]"

Excerpt From: Jamie Smith. "Gray Work ~ Jamie Smith

What I don't get is how this helps me. You two get superpowers, and I get what?"Cian smiled broadly. "You have a power, Meggie. You have a magical pussy. It was sleeping with you together that brought us into our power. That vagina of yours is pure gold, lover." Meg gave Cian a playful shove and rolled her eyes while he and his brother had a good laugh."Don't go expecting to use it on anyone else," Beck said as though the thought had suddenly occurred to him. "That only works on the two of us."Meg walked up to him and gave him a saucy smile. "Yes, Beck, I was planning on opening up shop. I was going to hang a sign on the cottage door and charge for it. ~ Sophie Oak

The Americans are like shadows . . . frightening until you finally touch them and realize that their image was their power all along. ~ Mark Henshaw

It's always funny to find what people's button is. ~ Seth Rogen