Idaho Funny Quotes

Frentzen is taking, er, reducing that gap between himself and Frentzen. ~ Murray Walker

I really think that sex always looks kind of funny in a movie. ~ William Friedkin

She appears to have a face that would stop a clock and raise hell with small watches, bless her heart. ~ Celia Rivenbark

Hanni, I'm going to have to watch you carefully. You may break a lot of hearts in London."
"What am I to break?" she asked with that lovely innocent smile.
"Hearts. Lots of Englishmen will fall in love with you."
"I hope so," she said. "I'm gonna be hot sexy dame. You can give me tips. ~ Rhys Bowen

Our love was a two-person game. At least until one of us died, and the other became a murderer. ~ Dark Jar Tin Zoo

Instead of heading for a big mental breakdown, I decided to have a small breakdown every Tuesday evening. ~ Graham Parke

To be able to make a good living in a challenging medium like soap operas is great. The best is that I get to act and am rewarded for it. And the people I work with are great. Funny, intelligent, hard working. They're all great to be around. ~ David Canary

Before my mom decided she was a lesbian, I thought lesbians were all these really nice, earthy, crunchy, let's smother you with our twenty extra pounds of lady love and fight the power people. ~ Alison Umminger

And you'd think that killing people would make them like you, but it doesn't. It just- it just makes them dead. ~ Joe Walker

Believers favour answers over questions, clarity over uncertainty. Athiests, more or less the same. Funny, when it comes to God, Whom we know next to nothing about, very few of us actually say, 'I don't know. ~ Elif Shafak

The funny and the most beautiful thing about LOVE is..
you don't need any one else to fall in love with,, you can love yourself, the ambiance
around you, the things which belong to you, and even those which don't.. ~ Sanhita Baruah

Being funny is one of the ultimate weapons a person can have in human society. ~ Jerry Seinfeld

The Cruise missiles do not frighten anyone. We are catching them like fish in a river. I mean here that over the past two days, we managed to shoot down 196 missiles before they hit their target. ~ Mohammed Saeed Al-Sahaf

Perspective is a funny thing. You think your back is to the wall, then something worse corners you, and the first threat looks puny in comparison. ~ Karen Marie Moning

I like being a funny lady. I think theres nothing sexier than a funny lady. ~ Maya Rudolph

I made a sad little noise. If my dick had been capable of noise, it would have made sad sounds, too.
Thank God it wasn't, or that motherfucker would have never shut up. ~ Adrienne Wilder

He thought about the difference between good times and bad times, and how funny it was that he could not state the difference, only feel it. ~ Tim O'Brien

I was one of Them: the Strange Ones. The Funny People. The Odd Tribes of autograph collectors and photographers. The Ones who waited through long days and nights, who used other people's dreams for their lives. ~ Ray Bradbury

If you get shot," Lira says, "I'm going to treat you like you're incapable of doing the simplest tasks."
She cradles her arms around her knees to keep out the cold.
"See how you like it when I hold out my arm to help you walk, even though you're not shot in the leg."
"I'd be flattered," I say, "that you would look for an excuse just to hold my hand."
"Perhaps I'm just looking for an excuse to shoot you. ~ Alexandra Christo

The funny thing about time in the OR, whether you race frenetically or proceed steadily, is that you have no sense of it passing. If boredom is, as Heidegger argued, the awareness of time passing, then surgery felt like the opposite: the intense focus made the arms of the clock seem arbitrarily placed. ~ Paul Kalanithi

Oh my god, I am a banana. ~ John Green

I am not schizoid. A little manic-depressive, maybe."
"'Know thyself.'"
"We try, sir. ~ Lois McMaster Bujold

Chemistry is a funny thing, miss. Sometimes those who are experiencing it aren't always aware they are. ~ Dakota Cassidy

Doode," George said.
He'd practiced all morning but still didn't get it quite right. "Nope, more u, less oo. Duuude."
"Dude."
"Dude."
"Okay, dude." George nodded.
"How's it hanging?" Jack asked.
"How am I supposed to answer that?" George looked at him.
"I don't think Kaldar said anything about that. I guess 'good'? I don't get it. What's hanging anyway?"
George shook his head. "Your stuff, you nimwit."
His stuff ... Oh. Ha! "In that case, it's hanging long!" Jack dissolved in giggles. "Long, get it? ~ Ilona Andrews

The Kappamaki, a whaling research ship, was currently researching the question: How many whales can you catch in one week? ~ Terry Pratchett

Beatrix wished she were a swooning sort of female. It seemed the only appropriate response to the situation.
Unfortunately, no matter how she tried to summon a swoon, her mind remained intractably conscious. ~ Lisa Kleypas

He thought of how when you went out and listened to what people said, you heard all kinds of things, people washing their dirty linen in public, talking about friends and business and,gash, and it made him think how the world must be, at every minute, so full of people fighting, and jazzing, and dying, and working, and losing jobs, and it was a funny world, all right, full of funny people, millions of them. And he was only one out of all these millions of people, and they were all trying to get along, and many of them had gotten farther than he. ~ James T. Farrell

For every book you buy, you should buy the time to read it. ~ Karl Lagerfeld

I [dad] spent hours on the phone. Do you know with whom?'
'One of those psychic hotlines?' Dad gritted his teeth. 'If only ... ~ Rachel Hawkins

It's funny because as a composer, you want to hear your songs live on. I think a lot of times people will create a song and it becomes stagnant or something that they're no longer interested in playing, and they leave it alone. ~ Christian Scott

I'm the youngest, too. When you're the youngest of a big family, people are like, "You're the baby, you're spoiled!" The fact of the matter is, when you're the youngest of a big family, by the time you're a teenager, your parents are insane. You're like, "Hey, I'm going roller-skating-" "You're not going roller-skating or you'll end up pregnant like your sister. Why don't you smoke pot and become a lawyer?" ~ Jim Gaffigan

I'm not going to touch her," he said "She's not mine.She never will be."
"Indeed." Bruiser rolled his eyes and dusted off his hat. "Definitely no years of pent-up lusting there. Glad we have that sorted. ~ Tessa Dare

I know a man who is a diamond cutter. He mows the lawn at Yankee Stadium. ~ Henny Youngman

What I want to do is to make people laugh so that they'll see things seriously. ~ William Zinsser

Xylophone is spelled with an X. That's wrong. It should be a Z up front. Next time you spell xylophone, use a Z. If someone says, "That's wrong!", you say, "No, it ain't." If you think that's wrong, then you need to have your head Z-rayed. ~ Mitch Hedberg

There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem? ~ Dustin Hoffman