Funny In Context Quotes

When a court officer suggested quarantine for Nerissa, she grabbed the man's pen and jammed it into the back of his hand, screaming that he was a Crimson Guard witch come to remove her memories and replace them with bird-song.
They decided to skip quarantine after that. ~ Caitlin Kittredge

In my film 'Queen', there was a funny moment with the bra. My director called and said they are blurring the bra. They said it is vulgar. Our director was furious about it. We are artistes ... We see props as they are. A woman's bra is not a danger to the society. ~ Kangana Ranaut

If you feel rooted in your home and family, if you're active in your community, there's nothing more empowering. The best way to make a difference in the world is to start by making a difference in your own life. ~ Julia Louis-Dreyfus

Thirty years later, Bruno was convinced that, taken in context, the episode could be summed up in one sentence: Caroline Yessayan's miniskirt was to blame for everything. ~ Michel Houellebecq

He said he didn't very well understand how George was going to sleep any more than he did now, seeing that there were only twenty-four hours in each day. ~ Gilbert K. Chesterton

Shouldn't you be at your posts?" Jayden stepped up.
Logan nodded.
"Just talking about ... girl stuff," Tristan said.
"Mascara," Blake said.
"What?" Tristan said.
"Leaving." Logan shoved the boys.
Jayden leaned in. "There's something the others wish to remain secret. But I think having the knowledge would be beneficial. You're - "
"Bait." I didn't bother to hide my grin.
"Precisely, but don't be alarmed because - " He jerked back. "You know?"
"I do."
Jayden stared blankly, then patted my head. "Excellent. ~ A&E Kirk

It was funny the things you noticed before a battle – the dust in the air hanging as if suspended in time. Drale almost wanted to part it with his hands and see what lay beyond. The huge pines cast shadows on the glad above the town and in the calm that descended Drale drew his sword and faced his attackers in a pool of liquid moonlight. ~ Elizabeth Novak

The effect of gender is produced through the stylization of the body and, hence, must be understood as the mundane way in which bodily gestures, movements, and styles of various kinds constitute the illusion of an abiding gendered self. This formulation moves the conception of gender off the ground of a substantial model of identity to one that requires a conception of gender as a constituted social temporality. ~ Judith Butler

I just asked you, Alan, what was your opinion about the trend towards modernisation in the performance of the classics?" Larry's dad said, with his lip curled up all funny.[ ... ]
"I think it's okay. I don't think you should diss actors just 'cause they can't afford proper costumes."
Then Larry laughed, but his family all looked at me like I had sauce all over my face or something. So I wiped my mouth, but it was clean anyhow. But I made sure I was extra careful eating after that, just in case. ~ J.L. Merrow

It's funny how after all those years attending youth events with light shows and bands, after all the contemporary Christian music and contemporary Christian books, after all the updated technology and dynamic speakers and missional enterprises and relevant marketing strategies designed to make Christianity cool, all I wanted from the church when I was ready to give it up was a quiet sanctuary and some candles. All I wanted was a safe place to be. Like so many, I was in search of sanctuary. ~ Rachel Held Evans

I had explained that a woman's asking for equality in the church would be comparable to a black person's demanding equality in the Ku Klux Klan ~ Mary Daly

If you give the audience what they expect, they'll be bored. There are no rules: You do what you want while respecting the boundaries. You don't poke people in the eye; you do things they haven't seen before and make it accessible, funny and clever. ~ Matthew Vaughn

It's difficult isn't it, when you're in a Mosque and everyone's praying and you really enjoy leapfrog. ~ Milton Jones

What I realized with Funny or Die is that I could take it into my own hands. On a much smaller scale, I think these videos are an accurate representation of who I am. As weird as they may be, I'm at least proud of them, and it showed that I do have a slightly different voice. I can't tell you how often people bring up these videos in interviews, and I'm so happy to talk about them because we created them from the ground up. ~ Dave Franco

We are told that Sin consists in acting contrary to God's commands, but we are also told that God is omnipotent ... This leads to frightful results ... The British State considers it the duty of an Englishman to kill people who are not English whenever a collection of elderly gentlemen in Westminster tells him to do so ... Church and State are placable enemies of both intelligence and virtue. ~ Bertrand Russell

Stories in families are colossally important. Every family has stories: some funny, some proud, some embarrassing, some shameful. Knowing them is proof of belonging to the family. ~ Salman Rushdie

No, she doesn't know it's me. I'm in disguise. Look, I know someone who does this with just a pair of glasses. And I have glasses AND a moustache. ~ Dan Slott

Clinton cannot possibly win in 2000. ~ Dan Quayle

How do we stop them?" Edilio asked. He raised his head, and Sam saw the distress on his face. "How do you think we stop them? When your fifteenth birthday rolls around, the easy thing is to take the poof. You gotta fight to resist it. We know that. So how are we going to tell kids this isn't real, this Orsay thing?"
"We just tell them," Astrid said.
"But we don't know if it's real or not," Edilio argued.
Astrid shrugged. She stared at nothing and kept her features very still. "We tell them it's all fake. Kids hate this place, but they don't want to die."
"How do we tell them if we don't know?" Edilio seemed genuinely puzzled.
Howard laughed. "Deely-O, Deely-O, you are such a doof sometimes." He put his feet down and leaned toward Edilio as if sharing a secret with him. "She means: We lie. Astrid means that we lie to everyone and tell them we do know for sure."
Edilio stared at Astrid like he was expecting her to deny it.
"It's for people's own good," Astrid said in a low voice, still looking at nothing.
"You know what's funny?" Howard said, grinning. "I was pretty sure we were coming to this meeting so Astrid could rank on Sam for not telling us the whole truth. And now, it turns out we're really here so Astrid can talk us all into becoming liars. ~ Michael Grant

Normally, burning is carried out from a Jeep or other open vehicle, the driver holding a torch out of the side, lighting grass as he goes. I'd seen Marlboro Man do it from afar but had never been up close and personal with the flames. Maybe he needs me to drive the Jeep! I thought. Or, better yet, man the torch! This could be really fun.
He asked me to meet him at the barn near his house, where his Jeep was parked. Just as I pulled up, I saw Marlboro Man exiting the barn…who two horses in hand. My stomach felt funny as I scrunched up my nose and mouthed the word crap. I wasn't comfortable riding a horse, and like my parents' marital problems, I'd been secretly hoping this whole "horse thing" would just up and magically disappear. ~ Ree Drummond

Often in my lectures when I use the phrase "imperialist white-supremacist capitalist patriarchy" to describe our nation's political system, audiences laugh. No one has ever explained why accurately naming this system is funny. The laughter is itself a weapon of patriarchal terrorism. ~ Bell Hooks

In Dzokchen, compassion is much more than the virtue of loving kindness. Nor does the word compassion in the Dzokchen context denote its English etymological meaning, "suffering together" or "empathy," although both these meanings may be inferred. Essentially, compassion indicates an open and receptive mind responding spontaneously to the exigencies of an ever-changing field of vibration to sustain the optimal awareness that serves self-and-others' ultimate desire for liberation and well-being. The conventional meaning of compassion denotes the latter, active part of this definition, and, due to the accretions of Christian connotation, response is limited to specifically virtuous activity. "Responsiveness" defines the origin and cause of selfless activity that can encompass all manner of response. On this nondual Dzokchen path virtue is the effect, not the cause; the ultimate compassionate response is whatever action maximizes Knowledge - loving kindness is the automatic function of Awareness. ~ Keith Dowman

Phoebe Hurty hired me to write copy for ads about teen aged clothes. I had to wear the clothes I praised. That was part of the job. And I became friends with her two sons, who were my age. I was over at their house all the time.

She would talk bawdily to me and her sons, and our girlfriends when we brought them around. She was funny. She was liberating. She taught us to be impolite in conversation not only about sexual matters, but about American history and famous heroes, about the distribution of wealth, about school, about everything.

I now make my living being impolite. I am clumsy at it. I keep trying to imitate the impoliteness which was so graceful in Phoebe Hurty. I think now that grace was easier for her than it is for me because of the mood of the Great Depression. She believed what so many Americans believed then: that the nation would be happy and just and rational when prosperity came.

I never hear that word anymore: Prosperity. It used to be a synonym for Paradise. And Phoebe Hurty was able to believe that the impoliteness she recommended would give shape to an American paradise.

Now her sort of impoliteness is in fashion. But nobody believes anymore in a new American paradise. I sure miss Phoebe Hurty. ~ Kurt Vonnegut Jr.

I held in the sneeze, though, by thinking of the word cucumber. It always works. ~ Merrie Haskell

Practically everybody in New York has half a mind to write a book -and does ~ Groucho Marx

The hotness of a sex scene lies in the loins of the beholder. ~ J.Leigh Hunter

We form our impression not globally, by placing ourselves in the broadest possible context, but locally, by comparing ourselves to people in the same boat as ourselves. ~ Malcolm Gladwell

I've been in love with the same woman for forty-one years. If my wife finds out, she'll kill me. ~ Henny Youngman

I'd rather hug Magic Johnson after he rolled around in barbed wire. ~ Jim Norton

The jewel in the baby product crown is the stroller. And if in America you are what you drive, then in Parentland, you are what you push. ~ Paul Reiser

Scenes change all the time. Scenes will change while you're shooting them, and you just have to roll with it 'cause that's what makes it funny. It's not being stuck in your character and how you're gonna do something, but to react to other people and to really have a real-life conversation. ~ Yara Shahidi

Right. Put Some coffee on while I think about this. I'm in dire need"
Merrick gave him a look. "You can't work the stove, can you?"
"I'm the eighth Earl Crane and the twelfth Viscount Fortunegate. I don't have to work the stove."
"Two extra names and you can't lift your arms any more. Bloody lucky they didn't make you a duke too or you'd forget how to brush your own teeth. ~ K.J. Charles