Mindy Quotes

I'd lost everything I had. I didn't have the heart to take from someone else." "Plus I would've sniped your ass. ~ Mindy McGinnis

I want to reach inside and pluck the darkness out of her ~ Mindy McGinnis

I have never regretted erring on the side of withholding information. ~ Mindy Kaling

When I watch roasts, I actually feel physically uncomfortable, like when I see a crow feast on a squirrel that has been hit by a car buy has not stopped moving yet. ~ Mindy Kaling

Something that's happened recently is that I don't beat myself up about stuff. ~ Mindy Kaling

But that's not going to help me sleep, so I pretend.
I pretend that I make the world a better place. ~ Mindy McGinnis

One of the unexpected and wonderfully fair things I have learned in my career is that if Hollywood were filled just with perfect-looking people, then soap operas would be the most-watched things in the world. But they're not. Looks are great, but they're not compelling enough. I've noticed that successful actors with long careers are usually talented actors with charismatic screen presences, and all of them exude one thing: confidence. ~ Mindy Kaling

There are laws in place that stop us from doing things. This is what we tell ourselves. In truth we stop ourselves; the law is a guideline for how to punish someone who is caught. ~ Mindy McGinnis

I never want anything to be too predictable. ~ Mindy Grossman

If you believe in yourself and work hard, your dreams will come true.
Well ... I guess the people who work hard whose dreams don't come true don't get to write books about it, so we never really find out what happens to them. So ...
If you believe in yourself and work hard, you have a fighting shot at having your dreams come true. ~ Mindy Kaling

So maybe we never would have realized we were so compatible if we hadn't been trading song lyrics and movie dialogue. That's textbook trivia right there."
Mindy looks unconvinced. "But that's how *everybody* gets together. They find some dumb thing they both know a little about that they can talk about until the waiter brings dinner. According to you, there probably isn't a marriage or a relationship or a friendship anywhere today that wasn't jump-started by trivia."
"I think that's exactly right," I agree. "To trivia. ~ Ken Jennings

She's like the people who will feed a stray cat all summer but not let them in their house when winter comes.

Those cats die, by the way. ~ Mindy McGinnis

They could be gone for years, healed over and laid to rest, and then out of nowhere the gun smoke stung my eyes, the wet jungle invaded my nose, and I had to bury them all over again. You could leave a war, but it never left you. ~ Mindy Mejia

That's my advice to people. You can't get hung up on thinking, "Am I the victim in this situation?" No, I'm in charge of it. ~ Mindy Kaling

People get scared when you try to do something, especially when it looks like you're succeeding. People do not get scared when you're failing. It calms them. But when you're winning, it makes them feel like they're losing or, worse yet, that maybe they should've tried to do something too, but now it's too late. And since they didn't, they want to stop you. You can't let them. ~ Mindy Kaling

A not 100-percent-perfect-looking-in-every-way female? You might as well film a dead squid decaying on a beach somewhere for two hours. ~ Mindy Kaling

I would love if gay men responded to me. All I want is for many gay men to dress up as me for Halloween. ~ Mindy Kaling

I feel the same way about clothes as I do about food. I want everything, ~ Mindy Kaling

7. Have one great cologne that's not from the drugstore. Just one. Wear very little of it, all the time. I cannot tell you how sexy it is to be enveloped in a hug by a man whose smell you remember. Then, anytime I smell that cologne, I think of you. ~ Mindy Kaling

No pasta. I'm serious. I will climb out of my coffin if anyone brings a baked ziti. ~ Mindy Kaling

If you are going to ask your crush for their phone number, you are one of the small group of women I am so jealous of. ~ Mindy Kaling

the Yankees were playing my hometown Red Sox on TV and I lost my cool at a guy who was loudly dissing them. I yelled, "Derek Jeter is baseball's Hitler!" This was in New York City. In a room full of Jewish sports fans. I don't even really like baseball that much! I have problems. ~ Mindy Kaling

We never needed best friend gear because I guess with real friends you don't have to make it official. It just is. ~ Mindy Kaling

We clung to each other with blind loyalty, like Lord Voldemort and his snake, Nagini. I, of course, was Nagini. If you messed with one of us, you knew you messed with both of us, and Voldemort was going to cast a murder spell on you, or Nagini was going to chomp on your jugular. ~ Mindy Kaling

Just as long as it pays enough to give me the option to go back to work part-time if I decide to pursue my hobby professionally, which is photographing cool manicures for Instagram. ~ Mindy Kaling

We always think of a diet with a big groan. But I think diets are fun. I think it is an American pastime for a lot of women. ~ Mindy Kaling

I want this, I do, but the bigness of the world ... it ... it kinda scares the shit out of me. ~ Mindy McGinnis

A honeymoon is, after all, a sex vacation you're giving yourself after a massive party in your honor. ~ Mindy Kaling

I've attended some pretty glamorous events over the years, like the Costume Ball at the Met, the Golden Globes, and the Vanity Fair Oscar party. They are usually held at distinguished cultural institutions like the Met or the Annenberg Center - always beautiful spaces that are home to priceless works of art. The first thing they do when a Hollywood party rents out the place is push all the art to the corner so it doesn't get in the way. They have to do that so there's room for a red carpet, a bar, a prime rib carving station, a photo booth, and, for some reason, an Acura parked inside, in the middle of the party floor. There's always a parked Acura at every major Hollywood party. Who ~ Mindy Kaling

Violence begets violence, and if I want to be a cog in that wheel, I have to accept when it stops on me. ~ Mindy McGinnis

It's blue and it's wailing because its little body is cold. The only people who think it's beautiful are its parents, and the doctor is just happy it's alive. And none of that is funny. ~ Mindy Kaling

There's obviously instances where I perceive sexism in my job ... I think that the sort of sexism that I see has been one that's a little bit like a gentler form of sexism, but still a little bit debilitating, which is that when, as a producer and a writer, whether it was at The Office or [at The Mindy Project], if I make a decision, it'll still seem like it's up for debate. ~ Mindy Kaling

He's rigged a tiny cassette player with a small set of foam earphones to listen to demo tapes and rough mixes. Occasionally he'll hand the device to Mindy, wanting her opinion, and each time, the experience of music pouring directly against her eardrums - hers alone - is a shock that makes her eyes well up; the privacy of it, the way it transforms her surroundings into a golden montage, as if she were looking back on this lark in Africa with Lou from some distant future. ~ Jennifer Egan

I hate gowns. It's a rare gown indeed that is cool. Most are elegant or whatever, a quality I don't put a big premium on. ~ Mindy Kaling

Just three words? Nothing about his physical health? His equipment? His supplies?'

'You got me,' she said. 'He left a detailed status report. I just decided to lie for no reason.'

'Funny,' Venkat said. 'Be a smart-ass to a guy seven levels above you at your company. See how that works out.'

'Oh no,' Mindy said. 'I might lose my job as an interplanetary voyeur? I guess I'd have to use my master's degree for something else.'

'I remember when you were shy.'

'I'm space paparazzi now. The attitude comes with the job. ~ Andy Weir

In terms of my Indianness, I try not to rely on it nor deny it. When it comes up organically in my writing, we can address it. About five years ago, we wrote this episode of 'The Office,' called 'Diwali,' which seemed like an organic way of using it. ~ Mindy Kaling

I get it. Decent guys backslide into meth and gang rape. Good guys knock up their girlfriends and flip burgers. ~ Mindy McGinnis

All women love Colin Firth: Mr. Darcy, Mark Darcy, George VI - at this point he could play the Craigslist Killer and people would be like, 'Oh my God, the Craigslist Killer has the most boyish smile! ~ Mindy Kaling

All of a sudden Mindy [Kaling] was writing on The Office and had sold a TV show. When we'd try to write shows, we'd jokingly call the word documents "Hit Show." We just couldn't crack the code. ~ Jake M. Johnson

Maybe the point is that any marriage is work, but you may as well pick work that you like. ~ Mindy Kaling

Nothing is ours; nothing is sacred. The one thing we shared was pulled into pieces, memorialized and mythologized so that everyone could participate in it. ~ Mindy McGinnis

The chorus of "Jack and Diane" is: Oh yeah, life goes on, long after the thrill of living is gone. Are you kidding me? The thrill of living was high school? Come on, Mr. Cougar Mellencamp. Get a life. ~ Mindy Kaling

They gave you that trophy so you wouldn't feel bad, not because you deserved it. You should know the difference. ~ Mindy Kaling

When you are entitled, you are the most insufferable person ever. If you are entitled and hardworking, which I am, you are still pretty insufferable, but at least you somewhat earned your entitled behavior. ~ Mindy Kaling

Why is everyone trying to tell me that when you get older it gets better? ~ Mindy Kaling

No, that is boring. If people want to see medical stuff they should watch ER. ~ Mindy Kaling

I get so worried about girls with body image stuff And I feel like I have been able to have a fun career and be an on-camera talent and be someone who has boyfriends and love interests and wears nice clothes and those kinds of things without having to be an emaciated stick. And it is possible to do it. In life, you don't have to be that way and you can have a great life, a fun life, and a fulfilling love life. ~ Mindy Kaling

You always want to keep your look clean and elegant, but you don't have to do the safe black-dress route. Have some fun! Wear something colorful with a hint of sparkle. ~ Mindy Kaling

Find it incredible impossible not to cry when I hear Stevie Nicks's "Landslide," especially the lyric: "I've been afraid of changing, because I've built my life around you." I think a good test to see if a human is actually a robot/android/cylon is to have them listen to this song lyric and study their reaction. If they don't cry, you should stab them through the heart. You will find a fusebox. ~ Mindy Kaling

Keep me safe, keep me from harm, keep me in your loving arms. ~ Mindy Starns Clark

That's because my show is on a major network and you can't show all that stuff, and also because my dad is alive and I would like to have lunch with him without feeling mired in dishonor. ~ Mindy Kaling

Our Klutz clangs into Stop signs while riding a bike, and knocks over giant displays of expensive fine china. Despite being five foot nine and weighing 110 pounds, she is basically like a drunk buffalo who has never been a part of human society. But Fred Tom loves her anyway. ~ Mindy Kaling

I'm an A student. I'm addicted to feedback, and I want to please people. That's sort of how I've gotten to where I am. ~ Mindy Kaling

The result of my not caring so much about what I say allows me to care more about how I say it. P. 4 ~ Mindy Kaling

One good thing about New York is that most people function daily while in a low-grade depression. It's not like if you're in Los Angeles, where everyone's so actively working on cheerfulness and mental and physical health that if they sense you're down, they shun you. Also, all that sunshine is a cruel joke when you're depressed. In New York, even in your misery, you feel like you belong. ~ Mindy Kaling

Sometimes you like the idea of someone so much, you just want to do whatever it takes to make it work. ~ Mindy Kaling

I stopped you because it's easier to fantasize about violence than actually perform it," she says a few minutes later. "Most people consider things they wouldn't do in real life, and there's enough visceral satisfaction in the thought to alleviate the emotion. In reality, hurting another person on purpose is not a simple task, and not everyone is up to it. ~ Mindy McGinnis

I always wanted to write, even before I realized that there was a comedy writers' world, or what that life was like. I never thought of myself, at least as a little kid, in terms of being the onscreen talent. I always thought it'd be so much fun to write sketches and be a writer. Even as little as 6 or 7, that's what my main interest was. ~ Mindy Kaling

I had these kind of unrealistic expectations that were fueled by romantic comedies, and it has both helped me and hurt me in many ways. It helped me because, in general, they've made me hopeful. I just figure things will eventually work out for me. But nobody is like any Tom Hanks character. Nobody is Hugh Grant. No one is Meg Ryan! ~ Mindy Kaling

The point is, it only traumatized me because I had the time to be traumatized. I want to be so famous and busy that I only ever find these insults amusing, and chuckle at them good-naturedly before I get on my private jet to be a UN Ambassador to Cameroon, or wherever. ~ Mindy Kaling

I had placed a lot of faith in Woody Allen's belief that 80 percent of success is just showing up. I said to myself: Are you serious? 80 percent? Sure, I can just show up. Here I am, New York! Give me a job! ~ Mindy Kaling

When people call me either a girl crush or their best friend, like, the best friend they want, that's, to me, the best compliment anyone could ever give me. ~ Mindy Kaling

I guess when you go to business school you never turn business off. ~ Mindy Kaling

cock. This wealthy man had definitely not ~ Mindy Wilde

What creates success on HSN is great product, a great story and a great storyteller. ~ Mindy Grossman

I am the kind of person that is drawn to colors against my will. ~ Mindy Kaling

There are some people who you've got to stay away from. They can't help themselves; they are just genetically programmed to screw you over. ~ Mindy Quigley

I had so much fun on 'The Mindy Project.' ~ Tim Daly

I don't consider myself a fashion person, I consider myself a shopping person. As a person who has girlie interests and a little bit of disposable income. ~ Mindy Kaling

I could not help but think how fortunate we are when we have real friends, people we can count on and turn to and who are always glad to see us when we are lonely. ~ Mindy Warshaw Skolsky

I liked hanging out with my family! Later, when you're grown up, you realize you never get to hang out with your family. You pretty much have only eighteen years to spend with them full time, and that's it. So, yeah, it all added up to a happy, memorable time. Even though I was never a star. ~ Mindy Kaling

I don't read them; I just hit "accept." iTunes may own my ovaries, for all I know. ~ Mindy Kaling

The idealism and adorability of Rob Lowe and Bradley Whitford had made me long for a civic-minded beau who is constantly making long, important speeches and taking principled stands. ~ Mindy Kaling

As I got older, I got craftier and less obvious, but I've always put a lot of energy and effort into people liking me. That's why I've never understood the compliment "effortless." People love to say: "She just walked into the party, charming people with her effortless beauty." I don't understand that at all. What's so wrong with effort, anyway? It means you care. What about the girl who "walked into the party, her determination to please apparent on her eager face"? Sure, she might seem a little crazy, and, yes, maybe everything she says sounds like conversation starters she found on a website, but at least she's trying. Let's give her a shot! ~ Mindy Kaling

I want to throw a party for the heartbreak
that turned you into a poet. ~ Mindy Nettifee

I dropped my bag to the floor and the sound echoed throughout the house. No one shouted, "who's home?" or "Cassie? Is that you?". Instead the house gobbled up the sound as if it didn't know when the next taste of noise would come. Then again, the house hadn't experienced Olivia yet. ~ Mindy Ruiz

My mom and I have always had issues. ~ Mindy McCready

My dad's whole family is in Madras and I was born in America so we didn't have that big Indian community. I don't really have anything interesting to say about it. When I talk about it people are like, 'meh, let's talk about something else.' ~ Mindy Kaling

Bribes and boy bands. That's all you need to be a babysitter. ~ Mindy Kaling

Skinny foodie, get away from me. ~ Mindy Kaling

If you are newly diagnosed, experiencing a recurrence, or caring for someone with brain cancer, I urge you to dig in, carry on, and fortify yourself with the knowledge that personal growth may, in fact, be obtained throughout this challenge. When ~ Mindy Elwell

Sometimes you just have to put on lip gloss and pretend to be psyched. ~ Mindy Kaling

I'm only halfway through with my makeup when Angela strolls out of the bathroom in a miniskirt and backless top.
"Wow," Mindy says. I wonder if it's the same wow I was thinking. As in, Wow, skanky much? I decide not to ask. ~ Mandy Hubbard

I have the right to life, liberty and chicken wings. ~ Mindy Kaling

I want you to picture me as a cute little anime character that popped out from behind a mushroom or something and landed in Hollywood. ~ Mindy Kaling

There is some pressure when you are a woman doing what I do that you must support all other women unconditionally, no matter what they're projecting, or writing, or producing, or putting forth as their art. I think that's equally arbitrary and random and unfair, and kind of sexist. The secretly sexist way. I have really high standards for what I think is funny. I have that for everything, and I think it would be disingenuous of me to blanket-ly love everything a woman has produced simply to make a statement that we're all in this together. ~ Mindy Kaling

Before and after the crime, not just during, in order ~ Mindy McGinnis

It's always bittersweet when you have a show that you own, that's against you. It's against one of our favorite comedies for NBC. And yes, that's part of the business model. House was on the Fox network for a number of years and was such a great business for the NBC-owned studio. That's part of what we're also trying to build. Hopefully, Mindy will help do that for us. ~ Robert Greenblatt

If someone called me chubby, it would no longer be something that kept me up late at night. Being called fat is not like being called stupid or unfunny, which is the worst thing you could ever say to me. Do I envy Jennifer Hudson for being able to lose all that weight and look smokin' hot? Of course, yes. Do I sometimes look at Gisele Bundchen and wonder how awesome life would be if I never had to wear Spanx? Duh, of course. That's kind of the point of Gisele Bundchen. And maybe I will, once or twice, for a very short period of time. But on the list of things I want to do in my lifetime, that's not near the top. I mean, it's not near the bottom either. I'd say it's right above "Learn to drive a vespa," but several notches below "film a chase scene for a movie. ~ Mindy Kaling

Catharsis isn't art. You can't rely on catharsis to get a laugh. Because guess what? People do laugh when something's shocking, but that is, to me, the absolute fakest of laughs. That's not something that sustains a television series, or a movie, or even 45 minutes of a stand-up set at Carolines. ~ Mindy Kaling

God ordained the days of your life, just like it says in Psalm 139. The story you so desperately wanted to hear was written by Him. ~ Mindy Starns Clark

It has come to the point where if I know I'm leaving a house with a man, I can factor in a bathroom visit or a phone call or both, and when I'm done, he'll almost be done tying his shoes. ~ Mindy Kaling

Learning about new hot sauces is the least expensive way to improve my quality of life. ~ Mindy Kaling

So that's my philosophy: If you believe in yourself, the chances and the opportunities will come around. ~ Mindy Cohn

When I've acted, and it's not been something I've written or have had at least a hand in writing, I do think there is a controlling side of me that is frustrated by that. And I actually don't think that it's a bad thing, because if I'm going to be in movies, in large part they're going to be movies that I write. ~ Mindy Kaling

I always knew I wanted kids, but when my mom passed away I was like, 'I want a bunch of kids. I want three kids or four kids, and I want to have that relationship again.' I can't bring my mom back, but I can have children. ~ Mindy Kaling

I once heard that Quentin Tarantino, who I obviously love and think is a genius, says that there's no such thing as guilty pleasure, there's only pleasures. And I do love that idea, because I do think that there's a pretentiousness when people make a list of their favorite things. I like to live a life where I don't think of my pleasures as guilty pleasures. ~ Mindy Kaling

So things were coming together nicely for me to embark on a full-fledged depression. One good thing about New York is that most people function daily while in a low-grade depression. ~ Mindy Kaling

You can't change the things you've done. It's now and the here on out you've got control of. ~ Mindy McGinnis

As a kid, I was curious but not remotely adventurous, if that makes sense. ~ Mindy Kaling