Kurt Quotes

And God created every living creature
that now moveth, and one was man. Mud as man alone could speak.
God leaned close as mud as man sat up, looked around, and spoke.
Man blinked. "What is the purpose of all this?" he asked politely.
"Everything must have a purpose?" asked God.
"Certainly," said man.
"Then I leave it to you to think of one for all this," said God. And He
went away. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

I never did any of things I was accused of. It was a total fabrication. ~ Kurt Busch

Everybody who is alive is a survivor, and everybody who is dead isn't," I said."So everybody alive must have the Survivor's Syndrome. It's that or death. I am so damn sick of people telling me proudly that they are survivors! ~ Kurt Vonnegut

It is a sobering thought that Gomer Pyle and the Beverly Hillbillies may be among our chief interstellar emissaries. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

Vanity rather than wisdom determines how the world is run. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

He won all those medals in the Second World War, which was staged by robots so that Dwayne Hoover could give a free-will reaction to such a holocaust. The war was such an extravaganza that there was scarcely a robots anywhere who didn't have a part to play. Harold Newcomb Wilbur got his medals for killing Japanese, who were yellow robots. They were fueled by rice. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

About astrology and palmistry: they are good because they make people vivid and full of possibilities. They are communism at its best. Everybody has a birthday and almost everybody has a palm. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

I was in college for two years, and just hated it in the '60s. ~ Kurt Loder

This image of his remained in the forefront of my memory so long, I think, because life itself can seem a lot like that: a matter of holding one's self-respect together, instead of a horse, as one's self-respect is expected to hurdle fences and hedges and water. My dear thirteen-year-old daughter Lily, having become a pretty adolescent, appears to me, as do most American adolescents, to be holding her self-respect together the best she can in a really scary steeplechase. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

I have been a soreheaded occupant of a file drawer labeled "science fiction" ... and I would like out, particularly since so many serious critics regularly mistake the drawer for a urinal. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

Some old traits never die, isn't that right Kurt?"
"And some are easily fixed with death. It was you who always taught me that," Kurt said ruthlessly. ~ Kia Carrington-Russell

It is a common experience among jailbirds to wake up and wonder why they are in jail ~ Kurt Vonnegut

We all do that thing which is the best in movies - we relate. ~ Kurt Russell

To provide touches of color in rooms with all-white walls. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

The discovery of the chrono-synclastic infundibula said to mankind in effect: "What makes you think you're going anywhere? ~ Kurt Vonnegut Jr.

To be told that you're the voice of your generation is such an incredible amount of pressure, and I haven't faced that. Maybe by the time our third record rolls around, I will. My goals are to be a band like that in five years. At the moment, though, I can't really relate in any sense to the scale that Kurt Cobain fame has reached. ~ Zachary Cole Smith

There's many a slip betwixt the cup and the lip. ~ Kurt Vonnegut Jr.

The visitor from outer space made a gift to Earth of a new Gospel. In it, Jesus really was a nobody, and a pain in the neck to a lot of people with better connections than he had. He still got to say all the lovely and puzzling things he said in the other Gospels.
So the people amused themselves one day by nailing him to a cross and planting the cross in the ground. There couldn't possibly be any repercussions, the lynchers thought.
The reader would have to think that, too, since the new Gospel hammered home again and again what a nobody Jesus was.
And then, just before the nobody died, the heavens opened up, and there was thunder and lightning. The voice of God came crashing down. He told the people that he was adopting the bum as his son giving him the full powers and privileges of The Son of the Creator of the Universe throughout all eternity. God said this From this moment on, He will punish horribly anybody who torments a bum who has no connections! ~ Kurt Vonnegut Jr.

You've got to stay in pretty good shape to be a pro wrestler, and all the TNA wrestlers get a bit nervous when I wrestle them because they're afraid I'll tire them out, but the Olympics is a whole different level. ~ Kurt Angle

As a kid I was the youngest member of my family, and the youngest child in any family is always a jokemaker, because a joke is the only way he can enter into an adult conversation. My sister was five years older than I was, my brother was nine years older than I was, and my parents were both talkers. So at the dinner table when I was very young, I was boring to all those other people. They did not want to hear about the dumb childish news of my days. They wanted to talk about really important stuff that happened in high school or maybe in college or at work. So the only way I could get into a conversation was to say something funny. ~ Kurt Vonnegut Jr.

It was through this viewer that he got his first reply from Tralfamadore. The reply was written on Earth in huge stones on a plain in what is now England. The ruins of the reply still stand, and are known as Stonehenge. The meaning of Stonehenge in Tralfamadorian, when viewed from above, is: Replacement part being rushed with all possible speed. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

All the people who follow me on Twitter know my sense of humor. I sometimes forget the blogosphere will give it more weight than I intended. ~ Kurt Sutter

I hate myself, and I want to die ~ Kurt Cobain

If chasing cool is important to you, you're an idiot! ~ Kurt Cobain

I couldn't survive my own pessimism if I didn't have some kind of sunny little dream. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

You can't write novels without a touch of paranoia. I'm paranoid as an act of good citizenship, concerned about what the powerful people are up to. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

I shouldn't be held responsible for my acts, since I was a political idiot, an artist who could not distinguish between reality and dreams ~ Kurt Vonnegut

Young conductors who are confident enough, they very often have success. ~ Kurt Masur

I am committing suicide by cigarette, I replied. She thought that was reasonably funny. I didn't. I thought it was hideous that I should scorn life that much, sucking away on cancer sticks. My brand is Pall Mall. The authentic suicides ask for Pall Malls. The dilettantes ask for Pell Mells. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

Best thunderclap came from Spengler, to the effect that science is either true or false, art is either shallow or deep. Second best came from some Supreme Court Justice, Jackson, I think, to the effect that one man's right to swing his fists stops where another man's nose begins. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

Your planet's immune system is trying to get rid of you. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

Someday son all this will be yours. Father and son atop a garbage dump. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

Why don't you take a flying fuck at a rolling doughnut? Why don't you take a flying fuck at the mooooooooooooon? ~ Kurt Vonnegut

In a 1972 story titled "The Big Space Fuck," Kurt Vonnegut names his spaceship with "eight hundred pounds of freeze-dried jizzum in its nose" the Arthur C. Clarke, "in honor of a famous space pioneer." Its mission is to impregnate the Andromeda Galaxy. ~ Michael Benson

I also appreciate the lasting friendships I've made while working with our great sponsors through the years, including Miller Lite, Shell and Dodge. ~ Kurt Busch

Rumfoord had known that Constant would try to debase the picture by using it in commerce. Constant's father had done a similar thing when he found he could not buy Leonardo's "Mona Lisa" at any price. The old man had punished Mona Lisa by having her used in an advertising campaign for suppositories. It was the free-enterprise way of handling beauty that threatened to get the upper hand. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

The gun made a ripping sound like the opening of a zipper on the fly of God Almighty. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

The world sucks, people are not true ~ Kurt Cobain

I was brought up by two people who just said, Whatever it is you're interested in, go do it. There is no winning or losing. You find out when you do it what the experience is. ~ Kurt Russell

Well, a lead is the most important thing about the story. ~ Kurt Loder

There is no shortage of wonderful writers. What we lack is a dependable mass of readers. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

I'm too busy acting like I'm not Naive. I've seen it all, I was here first. ~ Kurt Cobain

Anyway - because we are readers, we don't have to wait for some communications executive to decide what we should think about next - and how we should think about it. We can fill our heads with anything from aardvarks to zucchinis - at any time of night or day. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

He was held together by cotter pins, hose clamps, nuts, bolts, and magnets. Salo's tangerine-colored skin, which was so expressive when he was emotionally disturbed, could be put on or taken off like an Earthling wind-breaker. A magnetic zipper held it shut. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

World War One were simply additional places of hideously dangerous work, where a few men could supervise the wasting of millions of lives in the hopes of making money. It ~ Kurt Vonnegut

I don't understand anything technical about music at all. I don't understand any of it, why you can't put these sounds together with those sounds. I only know what sounds good. ~ Kurt Cobain

I joke that I learned the essentials of storytelling from Hanna-Barbera, but I pretty much did. That kind of television is what enamored me as a kid, and that's what really got me hooked. You could say that's where it all began. ~ Kurt Sutter

People need good lies. There are too many bad ones. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

All of the true things I am about to tell you are shameless lies. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

She was a dull person, but a sensational invitation to make babies. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

The Earthling figure who is most engaging to the Tralfamadorian mind, he says, is Charles Darwin - who taught that those who die are meant to die, that corpses are improvements. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

Excuse me, Ben," Bowen said. "Am I wrong, or aren't you the corporate treasurer?"
Glisan bristled. "Yes."
"What do you mean, you think you can get one?" Bowen shot back. "This is the current fucking maturities schedule! Go get it. You have to have a maturities schedule!"
But they didn't. With all the focus on deals and earnings- with finance group's transformation into a profit center rather than a division to support the business- the workday, boring details had been sloughed off.
p. 560 ~ Kurt Eichenwald

The books he and his supporters wanted out of the schools, one of mine among them, were not pornographic, although he would have liked our audience to think so. (There is the word "motherfucker" one time in my Slaughterhouse-Five, as in "Get out of the road, you dumb motherfucker." Ever since that word was published, way back in 1969, children have been attempting to have intercourse with their mothers. When it will stop no one knows.) ~ Kurt Vonnegut

TV is an eraser. ~ Kurt Vonnegut Jr.

I would kill Kurt. I would strangle him with my bare hands.

I stomped up the stairs to the second floor of Rogan's HQ, where Heart and Bug waited for me. Napoleon saw my face and ran behind Bug's chair to hide.

"Where is Kurt?" I growled.

Bug blinked. "I'm not sure I should tell you this information."

"Bug!"

"Kurt is a valuable member of the team, and you have murder on your face. ~ Ilona Andrews

Still, I insisted that I was as entitled to a Survivor's Syndrome as my father, so she asked me two questions. The first one was this: "Do you believe sometimes that you are a good person in a world where almost all of the other good people are dead?"
"No," I said.
"Do you sometimes believe that you must be wicked, since all the good people are dead, and that the only way to clear your name is to be dead, too?"
"No," I said.
"You may be entitled to the Survivor's Syndrome, but you didn't get it," she said. "Would you like to try for tuberculosis instead? ~ Kurt Vonnegut

I don't think he was knowable. I mean, when most people talk about knowing somebody a lot or a little, they're talking about the secrets they've been told or haven't been told. They're talking about intimate things, family things, love things," that nice old lady said to me. "Mr. Hoenikker had all those things in his life, the way every living person has to, but they weren't the main things with him. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

What gets me most about these people, Daddy, isn't how ignorant they are, or how much they drink. It's the way they have of thinking that everything nice in the world is a gift to the poor people from them or their ancestors. The first afternoon I was here, Mrs. Buntline made me come out on the back porch and look at the sunset. So I did, and I said I liked it very much, but she kept waiting for me to say something else. I couldn't think of what I was supposed to say, so I said what seemed like a dumb thing. "Thank you very much," I said. That is exactly what she was waiting for. "You're entirely welcome," she said. I have since thanked her for the ocean, the moon, the stars in the sky, and the United States Constitution. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

When I first met with Kurt [Sutter], it was one of those moments where you feel everything is happening for a reason. ~ Theo Rossi

I firmly believe that if members of Congress fail to perform their most basic duty in passing a budget, then they do not deserve to be paid. ~ Kurt Schrader

American fighter planes came in under the smoke to see if anything was moving. They saw Billy and the rest moving down there. The planes sprayed them with machine-gun bullets, but the bullets missed. Then they saw some other people moving down by the riverside and they shot at them. They hit some of them. So it goes. The idea was to hasten the end of the war. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

The horse jumped over the fucking fence. ~ Kurt Vonnegut Jr.

Unfortunately, that still leaves plenty of Americans who don't read much or think much
who will still be extremely useful in unjust wars. We are sick about that. We did the best we could. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

This was in a country where everybody was expected to pay his own bills for everything, and one of the most expensive things a person could do was get sick. ~ Kurt Vonnegut Jr.

But there are still plenty of people who will tell you that the most evil thing about Karl Marx was what he said about religion. He said it was the opium of the lower classes, as though he thought religion was bad for people, and he wanted to get rid of it. But when Marx said that, back in the 1840s, his use of the word "opium" wasn't simply metaphorical. Back then real opium was the only painkiller available, for toothaches or cancer of the throat, or whatever. He himself had used it. As a sincere friend of the downtrodden, he was saying he was glad they had something which could ease their pain at least a little bit, which was religion. He liked religion for doing that, and certainly didn't want to abolish it. OK? He might have said today as I say tonight, "Religion can be Tylenol for a lot of unhappy people, and I'm so glad it works. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

Bitcoins are not an investment. They are an investment fad that someday could be a real digital currency, but if they continue to behave as they have, they will instead be nothing. ~ Kurt Eichenwald

Prohibition was better than no liquor at all. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

Its basic axiom is to be followed by individuals as well as great nations, by Losers and Winners alike. We have demonstrated the workability of the axiom in Vietnam, in Bangladesh, in Biafra, in Palestinian refugee camps, in our own ghettos, in our migrant labor camps, on our Indian reservations, in our institutions for the defective and the deformed and the aged. This is it: Ignore agony. ~ Kurt Vonnegut Jr.

Don't worry about your father. He's a perfectly contented, self-sufficient zombie. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

It's a nice glass of champagne at the end of a life. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

It's not a good thing to be friends with people you're covering. There's just no point in doing it. It's tempting, but they're not going to consider you their friend anyway. They just know that you're somebody that can do something for them. ~ Kurt Loder

Like so many Americans, she was trying to construct a life that made sense from things she found in gift shops. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

I am a Conservative: Barack Obama is the Hans Gruber of American politics. #caring ~ Kurt Schlichter

Society questions the police and their methods, and the police say, Do you want the criminals off the street or not? ~ Kurt Russell

Marvel's got a crowded universe, and there are already so many characters hogging the spotlight that it's hard to break through that. First off, whatever character you're creating, odds are, there's already someone similar in one way or another. ~ Kurt Busiek

The development of mathematics toward greater precision has led, as is well known, to the formalization of large tracts of it, so that one can prove any theorem using nothing but a few mechanical rules ... One might therefore conjecture that these axioms and rules of inference are sufficient to decide any mathematical question that can at all be formally expressed in these systems. It will be shown below that this is not the case, that on the contrary there are in the two systems mentioned relatively simple problems in the theory of integers that cannot be decided on the basis of the axioms. ~ Kurt Godel

Little Newt snorted. "Religion!"
"Beg your pardon?" Castle said.
"See the cat?" asked Newt. "See the cradle? ~ Kurt Vonnegut Jr.

Human beings used to be molecules which could do many, many different sorts of dances, or decline to dance at all
as they pleased. My mother could do the waltz, the tango, the rumba ... ~ Kurt Vonnegut

Unhappy failures need not apply. ~ Kurt Vonnegut Jr.

At one point, I worked up a list of five requirements for a superhero: superpowers, a costume, a code name, a mission, and a milieu. If the character had three out of the five, they were a superhero. But that's just my definition. ~ Kurt Busiek

Montana was naked, and so was Billy, of course. He had a tremendous wang, incidentally. You never know who'll get one. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

I myself find him a master of utterly terminal pessimism, appalled by all that an insane humanity may yet survive to do. We are pollution. He wants us to feel no pity for Homo sapiens, and so excludes appealing women and children from his tales. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

I expected something pathological, but I did not expect the depth, the violence, and the almost intolerable beauty of the disease. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

Billy was guided by dread and the lack of dread. Dread told him when to stop. Lack of it told him when to move again. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

It's a strange thing to have a successful television show because if it's too interesting ... people don't really pay attention when they watch TV. It has to be good, but not so interesting that you really have to pay attention because people multitask. So, if a show demands your entire attention, it has a tough time making it. ~ Kurt Fuller

The hopes and fears of all the years are here with us tonight ~ Kurt Vonnegut

What would Chess be without silly mistakes? ~ Kurt Richter

Dammit, you've got to be kind. ~ Kurt Vonnegut Jr.

Guess there is a war on between them and us. But we never do anything about holding up our side of the war, except to keep our parade sites and our storage centers secret and to get out of bodies every time there's an air raid or the enemy fires a rocket or something. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

And we all vied, in saving face, to be the greatest student of human nature, the person with the quickest sense of humor. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

The duty of youth is to challenge corruption. ~ Kurt Cobain

When I got home from my war, my uncle Dan clapped me on the back, and he bellowed, 'You're a MAN now!'
I damn near killed my first German. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

Beer, of course, is actually a depressant, but poor people will never stop hoping otherwise. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

Kurt Cilke liked dogs because they could not conspire. They could not hide hostility, and they were not cunning. They did not lie awake at night planning to rob and murder other dogs. Treachery was beyond their scope. ~ Mario Puzo

Who ever told you a Chinaman was a coloured man? ~ Kurt Vonnegut

and she said, 'So there you are!' She asked Frank what he thought he was doing, and he said, 'Experimenting.' That's what Frank always used to say when people asked him what he thought he was doing. He always said, 'Experimenting.'

(p. 15) ~ Kurt Vonnegut Jr.

With the lights out, It's less dangerous. Here we are now, Entertain us. I feel stupid, And contagious. Here we are now. Entertain us. ~ Kurt Cobain

And what did the great British historian Edward Gibbon have to say about the human record so far? He said, "History is indeed little more than the register of the crimes, follies and misfortunes of mankind." The same can be said about this morning's issue of The New York Times. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

They say, you know, about evolution, it surely happened because their fossil record shows that. Look, my body and your body are miracles of design. Scientists are pretending they have the answer as how we got this way when natural selection couldn't possibly have produced such machines. ~ Kurt Vonnegut

We are about to be attacked by Al Qaeda. Wave flags if you have them. That always seems to scare them away. I'm kidding. ~ Kurt Vonnegut