Kidding Yourself Quotes

If there were an Olympics for kidding yourself, I'd take home the gold. ~ Huntley Fitzpatrick

Those who have succeeded at anything and don't mention luck are kidding themselves. ~ Larry King

It is economically irrational to exclude large environmental costs from the balance sheets of the producers and the consumers. You are only kidding yourself if you export those costs on to society as a whole. ~ John Holdren

The foolish coyote faith that could keep you flying as long as you kept kidding yourself that you could fly. ~ Michael Chabon

If you want to understand who you are and where you stand in this maelstrom of churning values, you have first to understand how commodity values get created and produced and with what consequences - social, environmental, political and the like. If you think you can solve a serious environmental question like global warming without actually confronting the question of by whom and how the foundational value structure of our society is being determined, then you are kidding yourself. So Marx insists that we must understand what commodity values and the social necessities that determine them are all about. ~ David Harvey

It seems to me you can be awfully happy in this life if you stand aside and watch and mind your own business, and let other people do as they like about damaging themselves and one another. You go on kidding yourself that you're impartial and tolerant and all that, then all of a sudden you realize you're dead, and you've never been alive at all. ~ Mary Stewart

When it's time to confess, you don't know what you're saying. Are you telling the truth, or do you confuse your lies with reality? The question is comical. The answer is lost in the maelstroms of consciousness. It's even impossible to pretend, eventually, that the question wasn't asked. You've been kidding yourself about yourself for so long, you're someone else. Your you is just a fragile fabrication. Every morning, you have to wake up, assemble this busy, dissembling monster, and get him or her on his or her feet again for another round of fantasy. ~ David Guterson

I'm the most experienced cinematographer in this medium, so there's no point in having that extra conversation in the middle of the loop. You're making the film in relation to what's happening now, and you can't really affect what's happening now. It's not like you're in control of anything in front of the camera. If you're calling yourself the director and you're not the cinematographer, I think you're kidding yourself. ~ David Douglas

I think becoming an actor because it's a ridiculously insecure profession to go into. I feel very comfortable but very lucky. I think any time that you imagine that it's plain sailing for hereon in, then you're kidding yourself. ~ Hugh Dancy

If you don't have doubts you're either kidding yourself or asleep. Doubts are the ants-in-the-pants of faith. They keep it alive and moving. ~ Frederick Buechner

You're only kidding yourself if you put creativity before craft. ~ Twyla Tharp

Don't undertake a project unless it is manifestly important and nearly impossible. ~ Edwin Land

Science is a method to keep yourself from kidding yourself. ~ Edwin Land

Marketing is what you do when your product is no good. ~ Edwin H. Land

Kidding yourself doesn't require that you have a sense of humor. But a sense of humor comes in handy for almost everything else. ~ Carrie Fisher

Co-dependent tennis is not a good game. When you serve the ball, someone should hit it back to you. If no one tries, the match should be over as far as you're concerned. Put your racket away, go home, find another game tomorrow. Stop returning your own serves, lobs, and volleys. Stop playing off your own energy, needs, and desires. Quit kidding yourself. ~ Lionel Fisher

Loose you're kidding, right? You're wound up tighter than a pissed-off rattlesnake. ~ Ashley Elston

Uhh, Emerson, are you okay?" Ryker asked as he unfolded his tall frame from the pickup, flickering his attention to Bash.
"She's fine," Bash answered for me.
"I sure as hell am not!" I answered.
"Are you going to stand there while this caveman carries me off?" Bash's hand tightened across my ass in response.
Ryker tilted his head and sighed. "Fuck my life, you two. You're not in the same town for a week and you're already at each other. Bash, are you going to hurt her? Rape her? Lock her away in a cave?"
"Don't be a pain in my ass, Ryker. Of course not."
"Emerson, are you honestly scared of Bash?" "What? No. He's just an asshole! Put me down!" I kicked my foot and Bash grunted. Good. "Okay, well you two kids have a nice night and work your shit out. Emmy, give him hell." He waved us off and went into the bar where his sister waited.
"Looks like it's just us, Emmy."
"You have to be kidding me," I groaned. ~ Rebecca Yarros

Scientists say that ... gender bending may keep fish from reproducing because, with so many in sexual limbo, there's just no real push to procreate.
Oh, if only deer, squirrels, and Kardashians would acquire this particular affliction. I'm just kidding. I don't really have anything against deer. Or squirrels. ~ Celia Rivenbark

(You think I'm gonna tell you how much I spend on fro yo? Are you kidding me? We just met. ~ Brian Donovan

Homer looked back at me. 'Pete, can I tell ya somethin' real important?'

'Sure, what is it?' I couldn't imagine what Homer was about to say.

He sat down on a rounded rock. I sat down too.

'One thing I've learned is that ya never know what's gonna happen to ya in this old life. Everything can change, just like that.' He snapped his fingers, loud and fast. 'You never know what might happen to ya and that dawg ah yers. Ya know what you should do? You ought to settle down here ... On my mountain.' His words were coming quickly and eagerly. 'I'll teach ya all the ways of livin' up here, and someday when ya get a place built, you can have yerself a family.'

Homer wasn't kidding me.

'And, besides, ya know I ain't gonna be here forever. When I leave, then you can take care of this place for me. You understand more than anyone why I love this place so much. I know ya wouldn't let them lumbermen and hunters come up here and hurt my place.'

There was a shell around Homer and reaching his heart was like breaking a granite boulder with your bare hands. But now, Homer's heart was breaking. After he finished he turned away from me. When he turned back, his questioning eyes were teary.

'Homer, what you just said was beautiful.' I looked down at my boots and rolled a rock back and forth under my heel. 'But, I don't know. I'll have to give it some serious thought, okay?'

As quickly as Homer had broken his s ~ Peter Jenkins

I like to work and there's no movies for actors, period, especially black actors. When white actors are like, 'Man, there's no work out there,' then black actors are like, 'Are you kidding me?' ~ Marlon Wayans

Suppose something would happen to the president, who would be in charge? The Vice President. Joe Biden? You have got to be kidding today when you say the Taliban's not our enemy. ~ Douglas Wilder

Are you kidding? I jumped off a building
of course I'm hurt. ~ Derek Landy

After a long moment Laurent said, with painful honesty, "I ... find it difficult to let go of control."
"No kidding," said Damen. ~ C.S. Pacat

Even if your husband is full of himself, he should be allowed to dream. Let him. Don't burst his bubble. Why would any man want to come home to a wife who rolled her eyes and said, "Right!," every time he had an idea or made a resolution? Maybe your husband wants to run for local political office. You know he doesn't have a prayer. He's running anyway. You want to say, "You've got to be kidding!" But in this case he doesn't want to hear the truth. He wants your support. So give it to him. Call all your friends and tell them to vote for him, stand by his side when he gives speeches, buy buttons and balloons and throw him a campaign party. It doesn't matter if he wins or loses, what matters is that you believe in him. ~ Ellen Fein

If you read reviews that you think by their very nature are not respectful of the actresses involved or not appreciating the work as it should be, I think you should write to reviewers or comment and say, "Are you kidding me?" ~ Romola Garai

Are you kidding?" She looked at me as if I'd just dropped from the moon. Her cheeks were bright red.
"What's the problem now?" I demanded.
"Me, go with you to the...the 'Thrill Ride of Love'? How embarrassing is that? What if somebody saw me?"
"Who's going to see you?" But my face was burning now, too. Leave it to a girl to make everything complicated. "Fine," I told her. "I'll do it myself." But when I started down the side of the pool, she followed me, muttering about how boys always messed things up. ~ Rick Riordan

Maddie looked up to the ceiling and said, "Dear Lord, I have finally accepted that this man is not a figment of my imagination and that he is actually real. Now, I find out he is an alien from outer space. Are you kidding me? ~ A.M. Hargrove

Stop kidding me, angel! ~ Piper Shelly

Hey police? I just saw the world's oldest, slowest kid climbing into Pleasantview Cemetery. Looked like he was dying to get in. Yeah, looked like a grave matter to me. Kidding? Oh no, I'm in dead earnest. Maybe you ought to dig into it. ~ Stephen King

I remember, my first bicycle was very much a used bike. I wasn't going to Wal-Mart, buying a flashy 10-speed bike from China. Are you kidding me? ~ Charles Schwab

"Where the hell are you?" he snapped when I answered.
"You're back? Good. So how was - ?"
"You're not here."
"Because I'm supposed to be waiting by the gate?"
"You know what I mean. Simon said you went to talk to Tori, but you're not on the property, so I'm really hoping you're with her."
I glanced at Tori's back, a half mile away. "Kind of."
"She took off, didn't she? And you went after her, knowing you aren't supposed to leave the property unaccompanied."
"Tori needs - "
"Tori can look after herself."
"And I can't?"
A growl. He knew better than to answer. Despite my lack of defensive superpowers, I'd gotten myself - and Tori - out of plenty of scrapes. Sometimes, knowing you don't have the skills to fight can be a bonus. With Tori, overconfidence equals lack of caution and, yes, as Derek would say, common sense.
"I'm just going to talk to her," I said. "I'll bring her home - "
"No, you'll come back. Right now. That's an order."
"Well, in that case . . . no."
A louder growl.
"Seriously?" I said. "An order? Has that ever worked?"
He grumbled something I couldn't hear and probably didn't want to.
"I'm not kidding, Chloe. Stop running, turn around, and - "
"I'll be back as soon as I catch her. 'Kay? Bye." ~ Kelley Armstrong

Ah, there you are, Bard," came a familiar voice, and she turned to see Alucard striding over.
"Saints, is that a dress you're in? The crew will never believe it."
"You've got to be kidding me," growled Kell. ~ V.E Schwab

It happened, you see, after the war, when I saw people making money while the others were dying in the trenches. You saw it and you couldn't do anything about it. Then later I was at the League of Nations, and there I saw the light. I really saw the world was ruled by the Golden Calf, by Mammon! Oh, no kidding! Implacably. Social consciousness certainly came to me late. ~ Louis Ferdinand Celine

All members of Congress should be required wear NASCAR uniforms. You know, the kind with the patches? That way we'd know who is sponsoring each of them. I think he was kidding; they'd never be able to do it but it's a great idea and would wake people up in this country. ~ Brad Thor

I have to admit, for a second it was sort of turning me on, because I kept imagining Georgia in a very positive light. She was donning designer swimwear with fringe or whatever and she was lying on her stomach with the bikini-top straps untied. I was lathering her up with sun block and my hands were getting into all the cracks and crevices. The image got me pretty excited, and before I knew it, I had an erection. At first I thought it would go away, but it kept getting worse, like harder in that painful way. So that's when I did something a little weird – I started barking at it. Like a Great Dane or a pit bull or whatever. I literally barked at my erection! And it worked, I'm not kidding. ~ Adam Rapp

It had insta-love, the bane of my existence ...
Who was I kidding? I sort of loved all that angst. ~ Jennifer L. Armentrout

I've been assigned to bodyguard you."
You've got to be kidding me.
Derek snorted.
Ascanio pretended not to hear it. "The Beast Lord spoke to me this morning. I'm responsible for your well-being, and if you get injured, I'll answer to him personally."
Oh, that bastard. Found the kid an impossible job, did he?
Derek laughed quietly.
Ascanio finally deemed it necessary to acknowledge Derek's existence. "Is something funny?"
"I don't even know you, and I feel sorry for you. ~ Ilona Andrews

You've got to be kidding. No self-respecting demon would be caught undead here. Heck, we're so podunk we don't even have a Burger Doodle."
"Demons find this Burger Doodle attractive?"
"Nah, if I had to guess, I'd say they're more into soul food." She clapped her hands over her mouth. "Oh, God, I made a pun. Slap me. ~ Lexi George

Bill looks different without a suit. He was wearing his old graduate school T-shirt. Which was Brown. The school. Not the color. His girlfriend was wearing sandals and a nice flowered dress. She even had hair under her arms. No kidding! ~ Stephen Chbosky

Hey Baby. Baby? You're kidding me, right? I was trying it out. No? No. ~ Cassandra Clare

I keep saying that the sexy job in the next 10 years will be statisticians, and I'm not kidding. ~ Hal Varian

He says he is starting a school here, and not just any school, but "the best of the best." He tells Signora Divino, his neighbor, "We will bring all the children from all over the world and we will live in harmony!" Is he kidding? ~ Sharon Creech

I gave you sympathy. *I* want sympathy!"
"Are you kidding me? You have the sexiest man on the planet wanting you. You're getting laid regularly. No sympathy for you! ~ Jill Shalvis

We all look so young. John with his rosy cheeks, Trevor with his chubby ones, Peter with his skinny legs.
Underneath the picture I wrote, THE BEGINNING. "Aww," he says tenderly. "Baby Lara Jean and Baby Peter. Where'd you find this?"
"In a shoe box."
He flicks John's smiling face. "Punk."
"Peter!"
"Just kidding," he says. ~ Jenny Han

I just realized I know nothing about you. Do you have a family? Where are you from?" The idea that I just invited a relative stranger, who owns nothing, to live in my apartment gave me a stomachache, but the weird thing was that I felt like I had known him forever.

"I'm from Detroit; my entire family still lives there. My mom works in a bakery at a grocery store and my dad is a retired electrician. I have twelve brothers and sisters."

"Really? I'm an only child. I can't imagine having a huge family like that - it must have been awesome!"

Relaxing his stance, he leaned his tattooed forearm onto the dresser and crossed his feet. Jackson came over and sat next to him. Will unconsciously began petting Jackson's head. It made my heart warm. "Actually, I don't have twelve brothers and sisters. I have one brother and eleven sisters." He paused. "I'm dead serious. My brother Ray is the oldest and I'm the youngest with eleven girls in between. I swear my parents just wanted to give Ray a brother, so they kept having more babies. By the time I was born, Ray was sixteen and didn't give a shit. On top of it, they all have R names except me. It's a f**king joke."

"You're kidding? Name 'em," I demanded.

In a super-fast voice Will recited, "Raymond, Reina, Rachelle, Rae, Riley, Rianna, Reese, Regan, Remy, Regina, Ranielle, Rebecca, and then me, Will."

"Surely they could have figured out another R name?"

"Well my br ~ Renee Carlino

Kai froze when his eyes landed on the desk and he started to laugh. On the corner of the desk sat a small, grime-filled cyborg foot. "You're kidding," he said, picking it up. "I thought it was becoming a token of good luck," said Torin. "Although in hindsight, I can't imagine what led me to think that." Smiling ~ Marissa Meyer

Dor shook his head. "The phrase. What does it mean?"
Sarah wondered if he was kidding. "Time flies? You know, like, time goes really fast and suddenly you're saying goodbye
and it's like no time passed at all?"
His eyes drifted. He liked it. "Time flies."
"With you," she added. ~ Mitch Albom

The national anthem blows. Are you kidding me? Do any of you have it on your iPod? ~ Daniel Tosh

We violated each other's boundaries with verbal missiles of anger disguised in the pretense of "just kidding. ~ David W. Earle

I don't use the computer. But my secretary does. I want to take some computer courses because I'm interested in some of the access to some of the illegal things on the Internet. I'm just kidding. ~ Ahmet Ertegun

Woodward said that he had told no one the name of Deep Throat.
Mrs. Graham paused. 'Tell me,' she said.
Woodward froze. He said he would give her the name if she wanted. He was praying she wouldn't press it. Mrs. Graham laughed, touched his arm and said she was only kidding, she didn't really want to carry that burden around with her. Woodward took a bite of his eggs, which were cold.
Carl Bernstein, Bob Woodward ~ Carl Bernstein