Romance Comedy Quotes

She drew in a breath. "So I have
this thing I do before sex. A test. An 'Is He Inhaler Worthy?'
test."
He just stared at her. "There's a test. Before sex."
"Yes. And I should tell you, not many pass."


"Chloe?"
"Yeah?"
"I'd be worth the inhaler," he said, then forced himself to walk away into the night. ~ Jill Shalvis

Nothing ends a first date faster than finding a dead body. ~ Katherine Bacher

She leaned her uninjured shoulder against his plump, furry behind and shoved while she bitched to herself, "Four years at the military academy, two years at Kansas State University, survival camp in the swamps of Alabama, more schooling in Florida, and then torture endurance training with the Mossad and all so I could heave a bear's ass into a helicopter. Unfreaking real. ~ Vonnie Davis

I am a down-to-earth gentleman who will never, under any circumstances, resemble some sort of romantic hero like Mr Darcy. ~ Samantha Tonge

, then why do you always forget that I love you very much? I love you very much, so even though it's indeed true that there are girls who are taller than you, slimmer than you, prettier than you, more clever, gentle and sensible than you in this world, but they are all none of my business. ~ Zhao Gangan

Abbey was born to sophistication, whereas I was more Barbara than Buckingham Palace Windsor. ~ Samantha Tonge

When I go to the movies, I like romance, comedy, and thrillers. I hate gore. ~ Peter Weller

More than just romantic comedy, I like romances: drama romance, romance comedy, comedy romance. I also go to the movies to escape. There are times when you go to learn, when you go to be moved, you go to be transported, and there are really times when you go to escape. And I personally escape more happily into a romance than I do violent movies. ~ Uma Thurman

Like two lost souls, we fall asleep in each other's arms, hoping to find ourselves once again. ~ Jalpa Williby

I'd single-handedly go to war and burn their whole organization to the ground before I ever let them harm what was mine. And there were no two ways about it- Brighton would always be mine. ~ A. Zavarelli

He'd touched her, felt her skin, seen her pleasure, and it scared the living hell out of him. She'd burn him if she got too close. And he wasn't sure he'd survive it. ~ Adriana Anders

You know what? I don't care about everyone. I never even cared about me. I cared about you. ~ Cristin Harber

Romance this moment, this hour, this day. String moments together like pearls on a rope. ~ Rachelle Du Bois

Thanks, for saving me."
"I didn't have a choice," he said softly.
"Everyone has a choice."
"Then mine was easy."
"Easy?"
He chuckled. "Olivia, my choice will always be simple when it comes to you... ~ Jettie Necole

You give me butterflies when I thing about you ~ Toni Aleo

Just that one word - sound - sent a strong answering pulse through her body. His tongue curled around syllables that weren't there, like a promise. This is what you'll get, if you just let me hear. ~ Charlotte Stein

Dark outside
Darker inside
Just me and my thoughts
I used to hate nights
With you, funny how my demons turned into angels ~ Ismaaciil C. Ubax

There is nothing better,
than sleeping and dreaming beside you -
It's like having a dream within a dream. ~ Timothy Joshua

She wasn't sure she could ever forget him. ~ Amanda Laneley

Are you sure you have enough sweetener in that? I could offer to conscript the rest of the cubes from the galley for you. ~ K.L. Tharp

People who know me, they know I have a sense of humor, I'm a bit of a joker, a bit of a clown really, and I would love someone to exploit that side of me and send me a romantic comedy. ~ Gary Oldman

Baby girl, you destroy me," he whispered against her lips. "You have to tell me if you don't want this because I'm holding on by a thread."
"Then let go," she whispered in reply. ~ Rachel Harris

We sat there in silence for a few minutes before he asked, "Is having sex with a werewolf considered bestiality?" -Carter ~ Joann I. Martin Sowles

Do you know what I have in my heart? I have hope. And I'll share it with the world. ~ Amanda Bouchet

As a child, rain meant endless amusement; in youth it meant romance; in middle-age, nothing mattered except the struggle of everyday living; but it was in the last leg of one's life when the rains assumed their sinister avatar. Thimma ~ Anand Neelakantan

Time. She had to go home. As soon as the lunar eclipse occurred in three weeks. Because if she stayed here, she would die. Either from the bullet in her back, or from the pain that was slowly sinking talons into her. ~ Shelly Thacker

Besides," he said, clomping down the centuries-old stone steps, "she won't last that long. Once she sees all those sharp swords and dirks, and all that fighting and mayhem, she'll turn around and leave, realizing she really didn't want to stay her after all. ~ Terry Spear

The scent of freshly laundered clothing that had been dried in the desert sun lingered around him. She breathed deeply, remembering how kind he had been to her that day, and she closed her eyes. The tip of his tongue brushed her mouth, and her lips parted slightly. She tilted her head back, relaxing against the strength of his arm as he cradled her. His other hand found her hip. Kisses, not so light now, trailed along her jaw before dipping lower. She sighed, the roughness of his unshaven cheek teasing the delicate skin of her throat, sparking a sense of restlessness in her that she did not know how to resolve. She wanted to touch him too, to kiss him in return, but she also wanted to stay just as she was because she liked what he did to her. ~ Paula Altenburg

Why did God have to make Mo'Nique a good actress? What was God thinking when he decided to give Mo'Nique acting chops. Now we have to endure Mo'Nique comedy specials. ~ Andy Kindler

I once saw a forklift lift a crate of forks. And it was way to literal for me. ~ Mitch Hedberg

I doubted any hospital in the world would be able to mend a shattered heart. (Taryn Mitchell) ~ Tina Reber

She licked her parched lips, moistening them, preparing them. "You could lose your job."
"You could be expelled."
"It's unethical."
"Dangerous."
His mouth hovered only millimeters over hers. "We doing this?"
She hooked her arms around his neck. "God yes. ~ Shelly Bell

We're soldiers, Emily. If we're not elders or council members then that's all we are. We're here to serve those above us. We're novel worthy, day walking, blood sucking, tortured souls trapped in a body that can't die for all eternity with no feelings, no emotions and no heart. We don't get to feel love, passion or desire. We do as we're told, for the good of the clan and because we're told to do it. And we protect people. So whatever grand delusions you have about being some kind of wonderful child and the master's favorite are just misguided attempts to feel human again. Get over it. ~ Elaine White

There can be a science to joke writing, there are certainly rules and patterns that can be followed, but I think most of the best comedy goes beyond the rules. ~ Robin Ince

Romance novels are all about desire and happily-ever-after, but happily-ever-after doesn't come from desire - at least not the kind portrayed in pulp romances. Real love is not to desire a person but to desire their happiness - sometimes even at the expense of our own happiness. Real love is to expand our own capacity for tolerance and caring, to actively seek another's well-being. All else is simply a charade of self-interest. ~ Richard Paul Evans

He touched her face, gently, with the back of his hand. 'you disappear so completely into your head sometimes.' he said. 'i wish i could follow you.'
you do, she wanted to say, you live in my head all the time ~ Cassandra Clare

It was all for the best. I am an elf, and he is a human. Thomas is a Knight, and I am a Princess. His Knighthood meant nothing in this world. Though it did make me wonder what it meant in his. In his world, did Knights and Princesses fall in love? I doubted it. ~ Rae Z. Ryans

One of our fundamental human needs is finding our partner that we hope we will stay with for the rest of our lives. You often find the same search in other genres. The mystery novel has a romance subplot. Literary novels often focus on that relationship but do not often end well. ~ Lauren Willig

It's great extremes which leads to great drama and great comedy. ~ Vince Vaughn

I love you too much to lose you over something so little.

"Roommates With Benefits. ~ Nicole Williams

I'd do anything for her if she really wanted me to. I would even walk away from the chance of a lifetime if she asked me to... and I could even be happy about it. ~ Mirella Muffarotto

It was deeper than some boy thinking she was cute. It was more like she was food and he was hungry. It was as if Mars needed her to survive. ~ Randy Russell

Only time will tell, as our memories fade into a past that isn't meant to be a part of the future. Eventually, we have to find a way to let them go, to move forward and accept what's to come. ~ A.M. Willard

If no one on this planet ever loves you, I always will. ~ C.J. Reid

From moment one, you were the wildest thing I've ever seen. ll I do is imagine how you'd taste. ~ Lola Dodge

Love? Love is for children and poor people... ~ Molly Harper

Maybe I am everything I knew that I would never be. I looked back at Jay and smiled. ~ Holly Hood

Drama is a complete meal, vitamins, proteins, carbohydrates. It's a slow burn thing. It's got an arc. Comedy is more like coke. ~ Eddie Izzard

He kissed you! He f@*#king kissed you right in front of me," Wharick growled through his clenched teeth. Kathel looked up from the ground where he was now leaning up on his elbows, far too pleased with his performance and having a look of mischief on his face. "Would you prefer that I kiss her when we aren't in front of you?" he asked sarcastically. ~ Madison Thorne Grey

Comedies of manners swiftly become obsolete when there are no longer any manners. ~ Noel Coward

94 was a good year to be twelve. Star Wars still had two more years as Box Office King, cartoons were still hand-drawn, and the Disney "D" still looked like a backwards "G." Words like "Columbine," "Al Qaeda" and "Y2K" were not synonymous with "terror," and 9-1-1 was an emergency number instead of a date. At twelve years old, summer still mattered. Monarch caterpillars still crawled beneath every milkweed leaf. Dandelions (or "wishes" as Mara called them) were flowers instead of pests. And divorce was still considered a tragedy. Before Mara, carnivals didn't make me sick. ~ Jake Vander Ark

THE SAFEST PLACE YOU COULD BE IS BESIDE ME. KANAME ~ Matsuri Hino

I like that kind of 'straight-faced' comedy. I like to be straight-faced and outrageous. ~ Leslie Nielsen

I sighed at the spectacular realization that I had never really allowed myself to believe that real cowboys might actually exist, especially not one with brains and killer blue eyes, alive and breathing in my barn. This man was a real cowboy, not on the big screen, in my dreams or in my imagination, but here in my barn. ~ Carly Kade