Inspirational Joke Quotes

I was smiling yesterday,I am smiling today and I will smile tomorrow.Simply because life is too short to cry for anything. ~ Santosh Kalwar

A rabbi had a conversation with the Lord about Heaven and Hell. "I will show you Hell," said the Lord, and he led the rabbi into a room containing a large round table. The people sitting around the table were famished and desperate. In the middle of the table was an enormous pot of stew that smelled so delicious that the rabbi's mouth watered. Each person around the table held a spoon with a very long handle. Although the long spoons just reached the pot, their handles were longer than the would-be diners' arms: thus, unable to bring food to their lips, no one could eat. The rabbi saw that their suffering was terrible indeed.


"Now I will show you Heaven," said the Lord, and they went into another room, exactly the same as the first. There was the same large round table, the same pot of stew. The people were equipped with the same long-handled spoons - but here everyone was well nourished and plump, laughing and talking. The rabbi could not understand. "It is simple, but it requires a certain skill," said the Lord. "In this room, you see, they have learned to feed each other. ~ Irving Yalom

Being a Muslim is not a joke but a challenge. If you think it is, come and live in Pakistan where you will know about Muslims' enemies around the globe ~ Faisal Nawaz Maitlo

Story telling is joke telling. ~ Andrew Stanton

Are you from the media? Tell the prime minister to go and get fucked from Nelligan. We really enjoy doing this shit, dickhead. ~ Paul Parker

I love the morning sun because it enlightens my heart and teaches me how to love others with an abundance of warmth and kindness. ~ Debasish Mridha

Treat the Disease, Not the Symptom.... ~ Randy Pausch

Sustainable- Nutritious Eating/Living has a Higher Purpose. ~ Elizabeth Salamanca-Brosig

Be strong, get beyond all superstitions, and be free. ~ Swami Vivekananda

The Peace Panda Says: While you meditate on your life ... pray for world harmony & peace! ~ Timothy Pina

If you have the capacity to be more than one thing , do everything that's inside of you. ~ T.D. Jakes

Do you want to know what you think about most of the time? Take a look at the results you're getting. That will tell you exactly what's going on inside. ~ Bob Proctor

I write to release. I write to feel free. I write to de-stigmatise a whole stigmatised culture. I write to challenge pre-populated norms. ~ D.J. Walters

I am worthy. I am enough. Safe. Secure. Worthy. Enough. ~ A.J.J. Bourque

In communities, at work, but particularly in families, people are put together in something like a three-legged race. God means us to cross the finish line together, and all the other people tied together with us play some part in our progress. They are oftentimes to rouse our stubborn sins to the surface, where we can deal with them and overcome them. Bundled together in families, a giant seven or nine or fifteen legged pack, we seem to make very poor progress indeed and fall to the ground in bickering heaps with some regularity. But God has put us together - has appointed each person in your bundle specifically for you, and you for them. And so, 'little children, let us love one another' with might and main, and keep hopping together toward the finish line. ~ Frederica Mathewes-Green

Individual organ of human brain makes individual decision for working of brain and driving behavior in humans. ~ Santosh Kalwar

Everything happened to find the balance of Life. ~ Lailah Gifty Akita

A Mother's love is something that no one can explain, It is made of deep devotion and of sacrifice and pain, It is endless and unselfish and enduring come what may For nothing can destroy it or take that love away ~ Helen Steiner Rice

Life is a vacation to enjoy the beauty of life. ~ Debasish Mridha

Good is the enemy of great. And that is one of the key reasons why we have so little that becomes great. We don't have great schools, principally because we have good schools. We don't have great government, principally because we have good government. Few people attain great lives, in large part because it is just so easy to settle for a good life. ~ James C. Collins

Only when one is connected to one's inner core is one connected to others. And, for me, the core, the inner spring, can best be re-found through solitude. ~ Anne Morrow Lindbergh

Before Gabe could react, he watched helplessly as Rachel slipped backwards and out of sight into the mountainside, a crumbling wall now the only thing he could see.
"Rachel!" Gabe shouted, rushing forward. Before Gabe could reach her Haim, being closer to where she had fallen through, leapt into the gaping hole after her. The group now only heard Haim's cries echoing in the darkness as they drifted further away. ~ Wendy Owens

We can best honor our dead by livin' well. Moving' forward dusna mean y love them any less. It just means ye're still alive. ~ Heather Blanton

I'm not saying that suffering is our fault. I believe we suffer because sin has taken hold of the world. And with sin comes selfishness and heartlessness and wickedness. But I also think there will be a day of reckoning, Nick, when God lays out all we've done and judges our actions. That's not as popular to talk about anymore, I suppose. We all like to hear about a God who loves and forgives rewards. But He isn't holy and just if He doesn't deal with all those wrongs. I would never want to stand before God without having done everything in my power to extend His mercy to the people around me whenever I could. ~ Janette Oke

Any day I'm vertical is a good day. ~ B.J. Gallagher

Once I was looking through the kitchen window at dusk and I saw an old woman looking in. Suddenly the light changed and I realized that the old woman was myself. you see, it all happens on the outside; inside one doesn't change. ~ Molly Keane

Sometimes in the studio movies I've been working in, you'll put a joke in a movie because the crowd loves it - not because I love it. ~ David Gordon Green

Ignore the pithiness, look for the goodness.
Fill the emptiness with love and kindness. ~ Debasish Mridha

You make mistakes, mistakes don't make you ~ Maxwell Maltz

When you get kicked in the teeth, chew on it: don't bite back. ~ K.C. Rhoads

Directing a movie is serious, it's not a joke. ~ Fred Durst

We are not here to judge each other but to Love One Another. ~ Wald Wassermann

And we didn't have cell phones. If you made plans to meet someone in a snow storm, and they didn't show up, you just had to assume they were devoured by wolves and go on with your life. ~ Stephen Colbert

If you are anxious, you can't learn. It's like dropping seeds on concrete. With a quiet mind, people take things in. ~ Herbert Benson

This reasoning is based on the wishful thinking that genius can only be earned through education and hard work. It denies the time-proven truth that genius can strike like a random bolt of lightning, at any time in any place, even in a humble glover's home in a small town in Elizabethan England. ~ Andrea Mays

I believe the Universe desires for us to choose to love as much as possible while we are here. ~ Renae A. Sauter

In the mist of Difficulty lies Opportunity. ~ Oprah Winfrey

If you'll not settle for anything less than your best, you will be amazed at what you can accomplish in your lives. ~ Vince Lombardi

I guess a little bit hero is enough. A little bit hero is all anyone really needs to be. ~ Alexander Gordon Smith

Wisdom is merely the counter power used against on your unique talents to prevent them turning into your deadly curses. ~ Alper Mazun

We are not necessarily doubting that God will do the best for us; we are wondering how painful the best will turn out to be. ~ C.S. Lewis

You gotta be in the NOW to create and experience the WOW! ~ Steve Maraboli

The patient person accepts a certain amount of failure knowing that it is as important a thread in the fabric of life as is success. Great individuals make great successes out of failure. ~ Denis Waitley

Unselfishness is the key to success in higher life ~ Samarpan

If you wait for inspiration to write you're not a writer, you're a waiter. ~ Dan Poynter

Love cannot come from where love is not. We cannot express love from within us for another if there is no love for ourselves within us. ~ O Shakoor

Try to see the good in all things... ~ M. Howson

The Canadian-Australian mathematician Norman Wildberger has posted an essay arguing that real numbers are a joke. ~ Max Tegmark

Don't become complacent because 'things could be worse' but rather get busy because 'things could be better'. ~ Bobby Darnell

Among a man's many good possessions, A good command of speech has no equal. Prosperity and ruin issue from the power of the tongue. Therefore, guard yourself against thoughtless speech. ~ Thiruvalluvar

The coaches will offer a direction, a plan, routine, discipline and the players must develop the desire to work together accepting their roles as they learn in preparation for the season. ~ George M. Gilbert

Any coward can fight a battle when he's sure of winning; but give me the man who has pluck to fight when he's sure of losing. That's my way, sir; and there are many victories worse than a defeat. ~ George Eliot

In the story of life, the prologue and epilogue are written by God. Yet the plot has been given to us; therefore we should write the best prose we can. ~ James D. Maxon