Comedy Movie Quotes

Nobody makes me bleed my own blood. Nobody! ~ Ben Stiller

Acting in a sitcom or a comedy movie is like a comedy routine with the setups. ~ Bill Burr

I am actually working on The Neighbors sitcom. We are starting from scratch. I am also working on a comedy movie and a vampire movie. I also have the pilot for The Tommy Wiseau Show and of course The House That Drips Blood On Alex, which we are hoping to make a sequel. ~ Tommy Wiseau

I don't want to talk to you no more, you empty headed animal food trough wiper. I fart in your general direction. Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries. ~ Graham Chapman

If you ask me right now, you've seen the last of Mind of Mencia. I don't want to be a one-trick pony. I would rather walk away and do more movies, comedy and even some dramatic roles. ~ Carlos Mencia

I was born a poor black child. ~ Al Gore

I grew up wanting to make movies, and along the way I suddenly found that I had a career doing comedy. ~ Ben Stiller

About 25 years ago, I was in an apartment, and next door, they put on the radio, so I struck the wall with my fist, but they did not put the radio down. I took a tool and banged until I made a hole through the wall. It was like a comedy movie. ~ Klaus Kinski

I can't imagine a successful comedy movie without a successful comedy performance at the heart of it. ~ Harold Ramis

The movie business is very difficult but the music business is just impossible. So I'll play in bands and record and play songs with other people, but for me it's a form of expression that all I need is me. I don't need cameras or agents, I can just have a piano and sing and feel totally verified. ~ Jeremy Renner

On one level, I would prefer never to hear the words 'James Bond' again, but on another level, it is part of my blood and my life. And it's the only movie in the world that offers a British actor the chance of international recognition. ~ Timothy Dalton

I think a lot of actors, sometimes what happens I think is that actors finish a movie and they go, 'Oh my god, I'm never going to work again,' even big huge actors, and so they'll take something thinking that something else will never come along. ~ Jonah Hill

'Black film,' that term allows studios to just marginalize a movie and say, 'We've made our black film. We've made our film with people of color in it,' as opposed to, 'I just feel like people of color should be in every genre.' ~ Gina Prince-Bythewood

I've made my evolutionary purpose and had children. I don't care if anybody likes me, I'm going to do what I want to do. I'm going to do a whole comedy show about swimming in the loathsomely cold waters of Maine. ~ John Hodgman

As far as just my stand-up is concerned, I don't care about changing anyone's mind. I'm not making an argument. I'm a guy doing comedy. ~ David Cross

A debut movie is something that you envision for many, many years. If you really want to make a movie, you constantly think about this first movie, so when you make it, you want to have everything in it. ~ Christoffer Boe

It was a lot of fun on the set. I had the most fun making that movie out of all of them. I'm sure if I sat and thought about it, but none that I could think of offhand. ~ Jason Mewes

The movie itself was very interesting, but I didn't think it was very good because I didn't really feel different when it was over. ~ Stephen Chbosky

You have to write a good score that you feel good about. At least, you're supposed to. But, if the director hates it, it ain't going to be in the movie! ~ Danny Elfman

I feel very protected when I see a movie. That's why I like making violent movies or radical movies. ~ Gaspar Noe

Latinos, Asians, African-Americans, women - we're all trying to find our place in this world of cinema and television and theater. And the great thing with comedy is that most of the time, you could be orange. It doesn't matter, as long you're funny. ~ Sandra Bullock

I have always, essentially, been waiting. Waiting to become something else, waiting to be that person I always thought I was on the verge of becoming, waiting for that life I thought I would have. In my head, I was always one step away. In high school, I was biding my time until I could become the college version of myself, the one my mind could see so clearly. In college, the post-college "adult" person was always looming in front of me, smarter, stronger, more organized. Then the married person, then the person I'd become when we have kids. For twenty years, literally, I have waited to become the thin version of myself, because that's when life will really begin.
And through all that waiting, here I am. My life is passing, day by day, and I am waiting for it to start. I am waiting for that time, that person, that event when my life will finally begin.
I love movies about "The Big Moment" – the game or the performance or the wedding day or the record deal, the stories that split time with that key event, and everything is reframed, before it and after it, because it has changed everything. I have always wanted this movie-worthy event, something that will change everything and grab me out of this waiting game into the whirlwind in front of me. I cry and cry at these movies, because I am still waiting for my own big moment. I had visions of life as an adventure, a thing to be celebrated and experienced, but all I was doing was going to work and coming home, and that ~ Shauna Niequist

Life is like a movie to me. Everybody has their own movie that's playing out every day, and you're writing it. ~ Julie Roberts

Horror is great storytelling with scary elements on top of it, but if you don't have great storytelling, you can have all the scares in the world, but the movie won't work. ~ Jason Blum

David Bowie in that Labyrinth movie. That guy is all seeing, all knowing. Has a crystal ball or something. What he doesn't know doesn't exist. ~ C.J. Duggan

When I do a film, the days before or the night before, I throw up. Sometimes it's just in my mouth and I swallow it back, but sometimes it's real. Whatever it is, it's hard. I don't do the first five or ten minutes of my character's appearance in a movie until the middle of the shooting schedule because I don't want him to be defined by my nervousness. So, we do the middle of the picture first. ~ Donald Sutherland

We do have a lot in common, the same earth, the same air, the same sky. Maybe if we started looking at what's the same instead of always looking at what's different...well who knows? ~ Meowth

You know how it's crazy embarrassing to watch a movie with your parents when a steamy love scene comes on? You basically wish the couch cushions would swallow you and suddenly the condition of your nail beds is far more interesting than what's on the screen? ~ Jen Malone

I like the 50s, party-movie aesthetic of the beach. I'm not really into modern-day beach. ~ Bethany Cosentino

Because I've done so many hour dramas, people tend to think of you as more of a dramatic actor and don't see you as doing comedy. ~ Amy Acker

The book's always better than the movie. ~ Richelle Mead

If life is a movie, most of us are watching the boring and talked over!
Well, it's still not too late; drop it.. and start afresh with a new and exciting one.
Remember, there's only one climax waiting to be experienced ! ~ Syed Arshad

Intimacy between humans need not be relegated to independent film. Real characters can exist no matter what the scale of a movie is. ~ Colin Trevorrow

I'm not a caterer. I just have to stay with my creative convictions. At some point, you have to just get past the special-interest groups and do what you're there to do, which is make a movie. ~ Ron Howard

I think I'd be too scared to direct my first movie and put myself in the center. ~ Joel Edgerton

I came to Los Angeles only after filming 'A Good Day to Die Hard,' when I was cast in the independent movie 'Delirium.' Director Lee Roy Kunz was looking everywhere for a Russian actress. He saw my photos, and only then he learned where I starred before! Eventually, I spent several months in the U.S., and we made the film quickly. ~ Yuliya Snigir

To her dismay, they were the kind of peppermints that are each wrapped in a little bit of cellophane. Placing her hands underneath the table, she unwrapped three peppermints, using the utmost - the word 'utmost.' when it is used here means 'most' - care not to make any of those crinkling noises that come from unwrapping a candy and are so annoying in movie theaters. ~ Lemony Snicket

I'm quitting the business today. I'm going to open up an appliance store, I've always really been into toasters. I'm giving it all up. ~ Dane Cook

For the past few years, I've been on a quest for a good old-fashioned date, the kind where the guy calls, makes the plans, picks you up in a car that's not his dad's or his other girlfriend's, and takes you somewhere that shows he put thought into what you might like, not what he might get off on like the latest how-many-naked-boobs-can-we-cram-into-this-movie-to-disguise-the-complete-lack-of-plot movie. I'm looking for the kind of date that starts with good conversation , has a sweet and satisfying middle, and ends with long, slow kisses and the dreamy feeling that you're walking on clouds. ~ Karen Marie Moning

I've had it happen to me before where it turns out that they never had the money and couldn't have made the movie in the first place. And these are the things you have to look for when trying to read the behavior of the people you sit down with. ~ Robert Culp

You can do a movie and hope it may be great, but until you have seen it, you don't know. I loved 'Rampart.' I love that one called 'The Hi-Low Country' that Steven Frears shot. ~ Woody Harrelson

After graduation, I was floundering in L.A., doing stand-up comedy and working in a shoe store in the Valley. ~ Kevin Spacey