Kayfabe News Quotes

If it's in the news, don't worry about it. The very definition of news is 'something that hardly ever happens. ~ John Brockman (Ed.)

Republicans like Fox News and NASCAR and Democrats like MSNBC and Starbucks." "Simple as that?" I asked, and he said, "Absolutely. ~ Jennifer Close

The diversity revolution [in the news media] was supposed to increase readership and enhance credibility. Just the opposite has resulted. How long will it take the business to figure this out? ~ John Leo

I take in a lot of stuff from real life, movies, television, news and it all gets mixed in my head and somehow turns into a story idea. ~ Janet Evanovich

When a tree falls it resounds with a thundering crash; and yet a whole forest grows in silence. ~ Jocelyn Murray

Charlie Polard was a former news anchor, now field reporter, whose star had been falling rapidly the past year. Consequently, his constant need to use Jack Daniels as his career coach had caused him to nearly miss several assignments. ~ Barry Sierer

I remember the mid-'50s well. It was when my life changed, and I left acting to become one of the first female television news reporters in the U.K. ~ Lynne Reid Banks

The good news is dollars don't vote, people do. ~ Dave Brat

We worshipped a great white body that was an avalanche of good news, and we slit it open in every part. "That can't go through the mail," the postman gasped, "because that is a super-stabbed body!" The super-stabbed body rose up, with many butterknives sticking out of it, and said, "I AM the mail." It had so many lovers. ~ Patricia Lockwood

The false alarm was the result of the explosive amplifying effects of a hyper-information society when fed sensitive news. ~ Liu Cixin

Bad news on the doorstep;I couldn't take one more step ~ Don McLean

My role at NBC was president of 'NBC News.' I had that role for eight years. ~ Steve Capus

Our chaotic, confused world has no greater need than to hear the message of good news - the Gospel of Jesus Christ. ~ Billy Graham

You're going to be okay," Winter said reassuringly.
You don't understand," Leven snapped.
What don't I understand?" Winters voice was stern. "Sorry you feel bad, but its not like you just met a person so beautiful that now you feel completely worthless."
What?" Leven said. "What are you talking about?"
Isaw the way you fell over yourselves to stare at her."
That was Geth."
Don't argue, you two," Geth said.
Were not arguing." Leven felt light-headed.
No," Winter confirmed. "We're just...."
Winter looked at Leven. Leven looked right back at her. Winters cheeks burned red and her green eyes outshone Leven's. The two of them stared at one other. Leven closed his eyes.
What are you doing?" Geth asked, concerned.
Winter closed her eyes too and leaned closer. Both of them looked panicked and out of control, but it didn't stop them from moving closer and kissing each other.
Clovers jaw dropped and he pulled something out of his void just so he could let go of it in shock. Even Geth looked caught off guard, as if he'd been given news that he never thought he'd hear in his lifetime.
Leven stumbled back and looked at Winter. His face was almost as red as hers. He looked at Geth and Clover and then back to Winter.
Well that was interesting," Clover said happily.
I don't know what....." Leven tried to say.
No, I......" Winter said. "Its not you.... it's just that my... I think I left something down below. ~ Obert Skye

I grew up in Cincinnati, Ohio, and my parents are really right wingers. My dad watches, like, five or six hours of 'Fox News' every day and stuff like that. ~ Jeffrey R. Immelt

What the gods are supposed to be, what the priests are commissioned to say, is not a sensational secret like what those running messengers of the Gospel had to say. Nobody else except those messengers has any Gospel; nobody else has any good news; for the simple reason that nobody else has any news.

Those runners gather impetus as they run. Ages afterwards they still speak as if something had just happened. They
have not lost the speed and momentum of messengers; they have hardly lost, as it were, the wild eyes of witnesses. In the Catholic Church, which is the cohort of the message, there are still those headlong acts of holiness that speak of something rapid and recent; a self-sacrifice that startles the world like a suicide. But it is not a suicide; it is not pessimistic; it is still as optimistic as St. Francis of the flowers and birds. It is newer in spirit than the newest schools of thought; and it is almost certainly on the eve of new triumphs. For these men serve a mother who seems to grow more beautiful as new generations rise up and call her blessed. We might sometimes fancy that the Church grows younger as the world grows old. ~ G.K. Chesterton

The good news is that women's roles have changed so dramatically over the past three decades that women now expect to have careers, balance work and family, express their individual autonomy. ~ Michael Kimmel

That's not news! When a shark comes out of the water, walks into a 7-11, and bites you in the ass, then it's news! ~ Carlos Mencia

A brand is a story. And you have to tell it well. The good news in this connected world great stories travel fast. And, these days, they travel for free. So there has never been a better time or a cheaper time to start something. ~ David Hieatt

There's no such thing as good news in America. ~ Morrissey

The media didn't hand it to Obama; after all, the Number One cable news channel, Fox, is right-wing. The Number One newspaper, the Wall Street Journal, also has a right-wing editorial slant (and is owned by the same guy who owns Fox News). The Number One talk radio show is Rush Limbaugh, and Sean Hannity is Number Two, and Glenn Beck is Number Three. When you control all the largest media outlets, it's time to stop grousing about liberal media bias. ~ Paul Begala

There was all this enthusiasm about amateurism and the idea that people could now just make videos in their bedroom, or blog news stories and share it online, and isn't this great? Now we can do it just for the love of it and not try to be professionals, corrupted by careerism. ~ Astra Taylor

The best test of whether someone is extremely stupid (or extremely wise) is whether financial and political news makes sense to him. ~ Nassim Nicholas Taleb

Offbeat questions are nearly impossible to prepare for, and they don't achieve the interviewer's objective - to test out-of-the-box thinking and the ability to perform under pressure. That's the bad news. The good news is that companies are moving away from them. ~ Travis Bradberry

Look at the news stand, you know? I mean, it's a cacophony of famous people or people who want to be famous with blurbs all around it, and it's supposed to be, you know, that's supposed to be creativity in journalism. My God, it's unbelievable. It's shocking. ~ George Lois

Poetry, the most intimate form of expression, gives us a deeper sense of reality than headlines and news stories ever could. ~ Naomi Shihab Nye

I've covered a couple wars and a lot of breaking news and a lot of cops-and-robbers situations. ~ John King

The news networks and the local TV stations all led with the same footage. An obviously moved, very pretty young woman with blond hair and alert blue eyes looking up. Eyes widening. Stumbling a little as she pushed back her chair and went around the table.
Shaky cameras turning too fast, following her as she ran to a boy at the back of the room who pushed through the press of people to reach her.
The embrace.
The kiss that went on for a very long time. ~ Michael Grant

So here I am, alone."
"You're not alone."
"When you're facing death, you're alone."
I grab Jenna by the shoulders. "Here's a news flash for you. We all face death. We all walk alone. The only difference is most of us don't know how close we are to it until it's too late. ~ Lisa Mondello

Here's a news flash: No soldier gives his life. That's not the way it works. Most soldiers who make a conscious decision to place themselves in harm's way do it to protect their buddies. They do it because of the bonds of friendship - and it goes so much deeper than friendship. ~ Eric Massa

Ladies, what in the world is wrong with men? I mean besides all the really obvious stuff. They think they have the handle on everything. And if a lady gets in behind the wheel of a sports car, they act all crazy, like we don't belong. Same thing with motorcycles. Let a gal cruise down the highway on her hog and you'd think she was Lady Godiva for all the stares that she gets. I got news for you, just because we don't...doesn't mean that we can't. Seriously, boys, you can be replaced by a few inches of rubber and a couple of D-cell batteries, so I wouldn't be too cocky. ~ T.W. Brown

Meanwhile, blacks observed how German prisoners housed at Camp Gordon were getting paid to work the grounds of the Augusta National Golf Club, and to pick peanuts, corn, and potatoes across the Savannah River. "They sing and whistle, seem to enjoy work," enthused the Augusta Chronicle. "Farmers are delighted." Such news stories left a bitter taste in the mouths of black Augustans, who felt the government was doing more for the enemy than it was willing to do for them. ~ RJ Smith

It isn't religion that's the opiate of the masses in the twenty-first century. It's fear. Fear is the new opioid. It makes us dull, paranoid, selfish and jittery, and we're fed it on the front of every newspaper, all day long on radio and TV and online news. Whether you've got ten million dollars or ten cents, these days fear drives everything. ~ Heather Rose - Bruny

The fact is that gossip, rumors, mythmaking, and news stories are not appropriate vehicles for the communication of nuances of truth, those subtle tonalities that are often the truly crucial elements in a causal chain. ~ Chaim Potok

I would listen to how they told the story, to what elements they used, to how it sounded, and that's who I patterned myself after, the people who were on CBS News. ~ Ed Bradley

The good news is I survived knowing you. The bad news is you were something I had to survive. ~ Fortesa Latifi

IT'S EASY to long for nothing but good news and carefree days, but a full life includes the broken and dark and difficult parts, too. Thank God for walking with you in the seasons of heartbreak. ~ Shauna Niequist

Most people don't think for themselves. They just regurgitate someone else's opinion and pass it off as their own. ~ Oliver Markus Malloy

Ordinary psyches often react to bad news with a momentary thrill, seeing the world, for once, in jagged clarity, as if lightning has just struck. But then darkness and dysfunction rush in. A mind such as Beethoven's remains illumined, or sees in the darkness shapes it never saw before, which inspire rather than terrify. This altered shape (raptus, he would say) makes art of the shapes, while holding in counterpoise such dualities as intellect and intuition, the conscious and the unconscious, mental health and mental disorder, the conventional and the unconventional, complexity and simplicity. ~ Edmund Morris

His day is done.

Is done.

The news came on the wings of a wind, reluctant to carry its burden.

Nelson Mandela's day is done.

The news, expected and still unwelcome, reached us in the United States, and suddenly our world became somber.

Our skies were leadened.

His day is done.

We see you, South African people standing speechless at the slamming of that final door through which no traveller returns.

Our spirits reach out to you Bantu, Zulu, Xhosa, Boer.

We think of you and your son of Africa, your father, your one more wonder of the world.

We send our souls to you as you reflect upon your David armed with a mere stone, facing down the mighty Goliath.

Your man of strength, Gideon, emerging triumphant.

Although born into the brutal embrace of Apartheid, scarred by the savage atmosphere of racism, unjustly imprisoned in the bloody maws of South African dungeons.

Would the man survive? Could the man survive?

His answer strengthened men and women around the world.

In the Alamo, in San Antonio, Texas, on the Golden Gate Bridge in San Francisco, in Chicago's Loop, in New Orleans Mardi Gras, in New York City's Times Square, we watched as the hope of Africa sprang through the prison's doors.

His stupendous heart intact, his gargantuan will hale and hearty.

He had not been crippled by brutes, nor ~ Maya Angelou

We are all regularly presented, day after day, with bad news, the worst, and I think our minds are more and more set into attitudes of foreboding and depression. But is it possible that all the bad things going on – and I don't have to list them, for we all know what they are – are a reaction, a dragging undertow, to a forward movement in the human social evolution that we can't easily see? Perhaps, looking back, let's say in a century or two centuries, is it possible people will say, 'That was a time when extremes battled for supremacy. The human mind was developing very fast in the direction of self-knowledge, self-command, and as always happens, as always has to happen, this thrust forward aroused its opposite, the forces of stupidity, brutality, mob thinking'? I think it is possible. I think that this is what is happening. ~ Doris Lessing

Follow the trend lines, not the headlines. ~ Bill Clinton

As information technology becomes millions of times more powerful, any particular use of it becomes correspondingly cheaper. Thus, it has become commonplace to expect online services (not just news, but 21st century treats like search or social networking) to be given for free, or rather, in exchange for acquiescence to being spied on. ~ Jaron Lanier

I told him that my cat was on fire and he didn't even hear me! On fire, Victoria! And he didn't care!"
"Aud, that is so fucking twisted that I don't even know where to start."
"Okay, I know, but it had to be drastic."
"That's not drastic, that's sadistic. You've got your –tics mixed up."
"Will you please focus on the issue at hand? Evan doesn't listen to what I'm saying!"
"And this is news?"
"Should I break up with him?"
"Do you want to break up with him?"
"I don't know. Distract me from feeling miserable."
"Umm… ummm… I got new shoes."
"Woo."
"Wanna come over and try them on?"
"I'll be there in ten minutes. ~ Robin Benway

You're home!" she said as she rushed through the front door. "Because I have some wonderful news, and I have to - Cody, don't just throw your jacket there; hang it up on the - Astor, for God's sake, don't slam the door like that. Here, take the baby," she said to me, thrusting Lily Anne in my direction and turning away again so rapidly that I had to lurch forward to grab the baby, spilling a quarter of a cup of coffee as I did. Rita ~ Jeff Lindsay

I can't stop some idiot from crashing into a building or blowing up a bus, I can only be your dad and give you a few pure truths. Number one, duct tape will save your life. Number two, Tupac is alive, but I need you to keep that on the DL because of Suge. And number three, don't be afraid of anything - except the television news because they're lying to you every night. ~ Christopher Titus

I believe that it is only through empathy, that the pain experienced by an Algerian woman, a North Korean dissident, a Rwandan child or an Iraqi prisoner, becomes real to me and not just passing news. And it is at times like this when I ask myself, am I prepared - like Huck Finn - to give up Sunday school heaven for the kind of hell that Huck chose? ~ Azar Nafisi

When I made coffee and Xeroxed and distributed newspapers at ABC News, I thought my life was over. ~ Katie Couric

You are fake news. ~ Donald J. Trump