Conan Quotes

The best way of successfully acting a part is to be it. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

Would you think me impertinent if I were to put your theories to a more severe test?" "On the contrary," he answered, "it would prevent me from taking a second dose of cocaine. I ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

In solving a problem of this sort, the grand thing is to be able to reason backwards. That is a very useful accomplishment, and a very easy one, but people do not practice it much. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

If you accept your misfortune and handle it right, your perceived failure can become a catalyst to profound reinvention. ~ Conan O'Brien

Gary Busey said on the Today Show yesterday that Donald Trump would make a great President. Now Trump just needs endorsements from Randy Quaid and Charlie Sheen. ~ Conan O'Brien

It is always a joy to meet an American, Mr. Moulton, for I am one of those who believes that the folly of a monarch and the blundering of a minister in far-gone years will not prevent our children from being some day citizens of the same world-wide country under a flag which shall be a quartering of the Union Jack with the Stars and Stripes. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

Of course, once you had yanked Conan the Barbarian's sword out of a book to fight off a rabid weresquirrel, "impossible" lost a lot of its punch. ~ Jim C. Hines

sister died of the dropsy which had long afflicted her." "That will be for a coroner to decide. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

Keep cool my babies. ~ Conan O'Brien

I've had ups in my life, and I've had downs, but I've learned not to cry over spilled milk. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

Texas Governor Rick Perry distanced himself from George W. Bush by saying, 'I went to Texas A&M. He went to Yale.' In other words, his idea of instilling confidence is by saying, 'Don't worry. I'm not as smart as George W. Bush.' ~ Conan O'Brien

Rev. Pat Robertson says that if more states legalize gay marriage, God will destroy America. He did say that afterwards, gays will come in and do a beautiful renovation. ~ Conan O'Brien

If the man who observes the myriad stars, and considers that they and their innumerable satellites move in their serene dignity through the heavens, each swinging clear of the other's orbit-if, I say, the man who sees this cannot realise the Creator's attributes without the help of the book of Job, then his view of things is beyond my understanding. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

We surely know by some nameless instinct more about our futures than we think we know. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

The big story today, Barack Obama was accused of insulting Sarah Palin when he criticized Republican policies by saying, you can put lipstick on a pig, but it's still a pig. Political experts say that if Obama keeps insulting Palin, he could lose the election and win a job at MSNBC. ~ Conan O'Brien

THE RESIDENT PATIENT ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

London, that great cesspool into which all the loungers and idlers of the Empire are irresistibly drained. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

We who claim toleration should be the first to extend it to others. I ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

Do you know anything on earth which has not a dangerous side if it is mishandled and exaggerated? ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

The victims of persecution had now turned persecutors on their own account, ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

There's a light in a woman's eyes that speaks louder than words. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

Donald Trump is not running for president. This is devastating news for Trump's supporters - all of whom are late night comedians. ~ Conan O'Brien

Chris Christie said he will top Donald Trump's Iowa State Fair helicopter entrance by riding in on a pony. As a result, all the ponies in Iowa have gone into hiding. ~ Conan O'Brien

There were no footmarks.'
'Meaning that you saw none?'
'I assure you, sir, that there were none.'
'My good Hopkins, I have investigated many crimes, but I have never yet seen one which was committed by a flying creature. As long as the criminal remains upon two legs so long must there be some indentation, some abrasion, some trifling displacement which can be detected by the scientific searcher. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

A fool takes in all the lumber of every sort that he comes across, so that the knowledge which might be useful to him gets crowded out, or at best is jumbled up with a lot of other things, so that he has a difficulty in laying his hands upon it. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

In the news, Chinese president Hu Jintao says that now that Barack Obama has been elected, he is looking forward to taking the relationship between China and the U.S. to the next level. That's what he said. Yeah. Then he said, 'Who knows, maybe we'll even go all the way.' ~ Conan O'Brien

Man, or at least criminal man, has lost all enterprise and originality. As to my own little practice, it seems to be degenerating into an agency for recovering lost lead pencils and giving advice to young ladies from boarding-schools. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

First Lady Michelle Obama appears on 'Sesame Street' to celebrate the show's 40th anniversary. It's going to be a big episode. Yes, sources say the episode gets a little tense when Ernie and Bert ask the first lady why her husband's dragging his feet on gay marriage. ~ Conan O'Brien

Facebook revamped its search feature. Now you can search for any post that has ever appeared on your page. It's helpful if you want to waste time this year remembering exactly how you wasted time last year. ~ Conan O'Brien

Earlier today Martha Stewart issued a statement saying 'I am innocent and will fight to clear my name.' Yeah, Martha then said 'I look forward to the day when people stop thinking I am guilty and get back to thinking I am cold and arrogant.' ~ Conan O'Brien

By God!' he whispered, drawing his breath in sharply, 'it is all pure Rider Haggard and Conan Doyle. ~ John Buchan

It was a singular bedroom, with its high walls of brown volumes, but there could be no more agreeable furniture to a bookworm like myself, and there is no scent so pleasant to my nostrils as that faint, subtle reek which comes from an ancient book. I assured him that I could desire no more charming chamber, and no more congenial surroundings. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

I don't speak for others and they don't speak for me. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

Conan mentally termed the creatures black men, for lack of a better term; instinctively he knew that these tall ebony beings were not men, as he understood the term. No ~ Robert E. Howard

With a keen eye for details, on truth prevails. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

Eliminate all other factors, and the one which remains must be the truth. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

Herman Cain has moved ahead of Mitt Romney. Can you believe that? Political analysts say this is because Americans don't understand Mormonism but they do understand pizza. ~ Conan O'Brien

As a rule, said Holmes, the more bizarre a thing is the less mysterious it proves to be. It is your commonplace, featureless crimes which are really puzzling, just as a commonplace face is the most difficult to identify. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

Holmes," I cried, "this is impossible." "Admirable!" he said. "A most illuminating remark. It IS impossible as I state it, and therefore I must in some respect have stated it wrong. Yet you saw for yourself. Can you suggest any fallacy? ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

Thousands of Mexicans gathered in Mexico City to protest high food prices. The protest only lasted an hour, because everyone had to leave for their jobs in Los Angeles ~ Conan O'Brien

Tom Brady says he wants to give the truck he was given as the Super Bowl MVP to the guy who won the Super Bowl for the Patriots. So Brady's giving his truck toSeahawks coach Pete Carroll. ~ Conan O'Brien

Fidel Castro declared that a robot would do a better job as president than Barack Obama. After hearing this, Mitt Romney thanked Castro for his endorsement. ~ Conan O'Brien

On Fox News, Donald Trump said Obama's birth certificate could indicate that he's a Muslim. Trump said he doesn't trust anyone with a foreign-sounding name, and neither does his daughter Ivanka. ~ Conan O'Brien

Writer for Conan, wrote a character for me called Andy's Little Sister. Her name was Stacey and she wore headgear and was obsessed with Conan. ~ Amy Poehler

I have hardly had time to think over all that you have told me. It's a big thing for a man to have to understand and to decide at one sitting. I should like to have a quiet hour by myself to make up my mind. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

A conjurer gets no credit once he has explained his trick; ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

It is fortunate for this community that I am not a criminal. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

Indeed!" I murmured. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

That hurts my pride, Watson. It is a petty feeling, no doubt, but it hurts my pride. It becomes a personal matter with me now..."

-Sherlock Holmes-
-The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes: The Five Orange Pips- ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

Mr. Sherlock Holmes ... was usually very late in the mornings, save upon those not infrequent occasions when he was up all night. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

In New York, we had primary elections for mayor. To improve their chances, all five candidates changed their name to Rudy Giuliani. ~ Conan O'Brien

I felt Holmes's hand steal into mine and give me a reassuring shake.
- Watson ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

Once you discover white paint, you'll never wash your underwear again. ~ Conan O'Brien

But the romance was there," I remonstrated. "I could not tamper with the facts." "Some ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

THE REIGATE PUZZLE ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

my orderly, who threw me across a pack-horse, and succeeded in bringing me safely to the British lines. Worn with pain, and weak from the prolonged hardships ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

The soul is swayed by the waters. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

It is of the first importance not to allow your judgment to be biased by personal qualities. A client is to me a mere unit,
a factor in a problem. - Sherlock Holmes ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

NBC announced that during the summer Olympics they will set a new record by airing over 1200 hours of coverage. Which is amazing because that's 10 hours longer than the coverage of Reagan's funeral. ~ Conan O'Brien

It is not easy to express the inexpressible, he answered with a laugh. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

an unbeliever may be as bigoted as any of the orthodox, and ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

Lie down there on the sofa and see if I can put you to sleep.
He took up his violin fom the corner, and as I stretched myself out he began to play some low, dreamy, melodious air - his own no doubt, for he had a remarkable gift for improvisation. I have a vague remembrance of his gaunt limbs, his earnest face and the rise and fall of his bow. Then I seemed to be floated peacefully away upon a soft sea of sound until I found myself in dreamland, with the sweet face of Mary Morstan looking down upon me. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

You have a grand gift for silence, Watson. It makes you quite invaluable as a companion. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

Pinner. "'Thank you very much,' said he; 'I fear that I underrated the difficulty of the task. This list will be of very material assistance to me.' "'It took some time,' said I. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

I think that I had better go, Holmes."
"Not a bit, doctor. Stay where you are. I am lost without my Boswell. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

For the love of his art ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

You yourself may not be luminous, but you are a conductor of light. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

I love the role I'm playing in 'Conan.' I'm enjoying making the film tremendously. It's very physically demanding. You know, Conan is 28 years younger than me and a big dude, so I have to depend upon my wolf-like wiles to defeat this young bull. ~ Stephen Lang

Look at you. Why is the only woman you ever cared about a world-class criminal - are you a masochist? ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

Just as an octopus may have his den in some ocean cave, and come floating out a silent image of horror to attack a swimmer, so I picture such a spirit lurking in the dark of the house which he curses by his presence, and ready to float out upon all whom he can injure. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

I have frequently gained my first real insight into the character of parents by studying their children. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

When we think how narrow and devious this path of nature is, how dimly we can trace it, for all our lamps of science, and how from the darkness which girds it round great and terrible possibilities loom ever shadowly upwards, it is a bold and a confident man who will put a limit to the strange by-oaths into which the human spirit may wander. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

He burst into one of his rare fits of laughter as he turned away from the picture. I have not heard him laugh often, and it has always boded ill to somebody. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

President Obama filled out his March Madness bracket. You can tell Obama's mind is elsewhere because his top two picks were Israel and Iran. ~ Conan O'Brien

I have asked myself if the best which can be done with virtue is to shut it within high walls as though it were some savage creature. If the good will lock themselves up, and if the wicked will still wander free, then alas for the world! Alleyne ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

The sun had long set, but one blood-red gash like an open wound lay low in the distant west. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

The top 15 contenders for the Republican nomination own at least 40 guns among them. If we elect a Republican president no one is hopping over the White House fence ever again. ~ Conan O'Brien

not to have useless facts elbowing out the useful ones.' 'But ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

I consider that a man's brain is originally like a little empty attic, and you have to stock it with such furniture as you choose. A fool takes in all the lumber of every sort that he comes across, so that the knowledge that might be useful to him gets crowded out. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

Today Facebook went public, just as Myspace's last user went private. ~ Conan O'Brien

In the darkest corner of a darkened room, all Sherlock Homes stories begin. In the pregnant dim of gaslight and smoke, Holmes would sit, digesting the day's papers, puffing on his long pipe, injecting himself with cocaine. He would pop smoke rings into the gloom, waiting for something, anything, to pierce into the belly of his study and release the promise of adventure; of clues to interpret; of, at last he would plead, a puzzle he could not solve. And after each story he would return here, into the dark room, and die day by day of boredom. The darkness of his study was his cage, but also the womb of his genius. ~ Graham Moore

You will, I am sure, agree with me that ... if page 534 only finds us in the second chapter, the length of the first one must have been really intolerable. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

It is only when you touch the higher that you realize how low we may be among the possibilities of creation. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

Good old Watson! You are the one fixed point in a changing age. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

It was worth a wound - it was worth many wounds - to know the depth of loyalty and love that lay behind that cold mask. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

Russia's Vladimir Putin appeared in public for the first time after a mysterious 10-day absence. Putin said it took him that long to recover from the finale of 'The Bachelor.' ~ Conan O'Brien

That head of yours should be for use as well as
ornament. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

Why should you go further in it? What have you to gain from it?" "What, indeed? It is art for art's sake, Watson. I suppose when you doctored you found yourself studying cases without thought of a fee?" "For my education, Holmes." "Education never ends, Watson. It is a series of lessons with the greatest for the last. This is an instructive case. There ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

In rapid succession we passed through the fringe of fashionable London, hotel London, theatrical London, literary London, commercial London, and, finally, maritime London ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

I followed you.'
I saw no one.'
That is what you may expect to see when I follow you. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

Santa will be showing up with Rudolph the Red-Eyed Reindeer. ~ Conan O'Brien

There's an east wind coming all the same, such a wind as never blew on England yet. It will be cold and bitter, Watson, and a good many of us may wither before its blast. But it's God's own wind none the less and a cleaner, better stronger land will lie in the sunshine when the storm has cleared. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

A town in Upstate New York is being accused of being biased 'cause they sent out absentee ballots that say 'Barack Osama.' Today they apologized and printed new ballots that say 'Barack Hussein Osama.' ~ Conan O'Brien

He seems to have declared war on the King's English as well as on the English king. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

Some mechanism in my sub-consciousness took the dominant characteristics of various prize-fighters, gunmen, bootleggers, oil field bullies, gamblers, and honest workmen I had come in contact with, and combining them all, produced the amalgamation I call Conan the Cimmerian. ~ Robert E. Howard

It might have driven me mad; but I was always a pretty stubborn one, so I just held on and bided my time. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

Utah could elect its first black Republican woman to Congress. In other words, Utah finally got one black person and the first thing they want to do is send her to Washington. ~ Conan O'Brien

Nothing could exceed his energy when the working fit was upon him: but now and again a reaction would seize him, and for days on end he would lie upon the sofa in the sitting- room, hardly uttering a word or moving a muscle from morning to night. On these occasions I have noticed such a dreamy, vacant expression in his eyes, that I might have suspected him of being addicted to the use of some narcotic, had not the temperance and cleanliness of his whole life forbidden such a notion. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

Bitterness is a paralytic.
Love is a much more serious motivator. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle

I reached this one, said my friend, by sitting upon five pillows and consuming an ounce of shag. I think, Watson, that if we drive to Baker-street we shall just be in time for breakfast. ~ Arthur Conan Doyle