Schmuck Andor Quotes

You are safe, Lorraine. You will always be safe from me. You are the one person in this world I could never harm for any reason. ~ Christine Feehan

I'm not a schmuck. Even if the world goes to hell in a handbasket, I won't lose a penny. ~ Donald Trump

Basically, if you're not a utopianist, you're a schmuck. ~ Jonathan Feldman

You greedy schmuck!" Denise burst out.
Ian cast a leisurely glance in her direction. "And now my feelings are hurt. That'll cost you the boat, too. ~ Jeaniene Frost

Yeah, I made it. It sneaks up on you. You're some schmuck and you wake up one day and you go, Good God, I'm the cheese. ~ William H. Macy

I yawned awake ready to blow stuff up like a 90s action-star. I'd become what I despised, a misguided schmuck following the status-quo for the sole purpose of fitting in. Whatever... gunrunners, terrorists, bankers, dictators, goons; we all have it coming. ~ Bruce Crown

He muttered something foul and then climbed the stairs, rapping twice on Timmie's door.
"Right, then, mate, terribly sorry for my unspeakable rudeness, and I do beg your pardon,"
he said with admirable humbleness when Timmie cracked it open. Only I could pick up the
slight edge to his voice as he went on. "I can only say that it was caused by my natural
affront to the notion of her as my sister. Since I'll be shagging her tonight, you can
imagine how I'd be distressed at the thought of rogering my sibling."
"You schmuck!" I burst as Timmie's jaw dropped. "The only thing you'll be shagging
tonight is yourself!"
"You wanted sincerity," he countered. "Well, luv, I was sincere. ~ Jeaniene Frost

It was turning out to be an anxious Christmas season. Too many were the early mornings spent sitting at the table, insomniac in the gray dawn, thinking to myself, Eggs would be good. Not for eating but for the viscous wrath of my ovobarrage. It seemed only a matter of time before I was lobbing my edible artillery out the window at the army of malefactors who daily made my life such a buzzing carnival of annoyance. I could almost feel the satisfying, sloshy heft of my weapons as I imagined them leaving my hands and raining down upon my targets: the pair of schnauzers two doors down, with their loathsome, skittish dispositions, barking and yelping all day long; their owner, with her white hair styled like Marlene Dietrich's in Blond Venus, who allows them to pee freely on the garbage that some poor sanitation worker then has to pick up; the leather-clad schmuck immediately next door, a cigar-smoking casual life-ruiner with his mufflerless motorcycle. All would taste my All Natural, Vegetarian Feed, Grade A Extra Large brand of justice! ~ David Rakoff

Any schmuck can be unhappy when things aren't going well, but it takes a truly unique variety of schmuck; a real innovator in the schmuck field to be unhappy when things are going as great as they are for me. ~ Tropper Jonathan

You are a schmuck," I informed the hero. "You're not using the word correctly," he said. "Yes I am," I said. ~ Jonathan Safran Foer

And you attacked them with that saucepot. Seriously, csecsemo, I wouldn't try that again. I can see you are determined to learn to fight these creatures, and I am trying my best to look at all the reasons why it is a good idea that you do learn, but saucepots are out. ~ Christine Feehan

Yes, of course I want to get married, but does that mean I'm not allowed to go out and have a good time? Am I supposed to just marry any schmuck that comes along? And by the way, here's a newsflash, Hammertoes. Nobody wants to marry me, anyway. ~ Chelsea Handler

The Internet is a beautiful thing and you sent a tweet an hour after we met that day: I smell cheeseburgers. #CornerBistroIsMakingMeFat

And let me tell you, for a moment there, I was concerned. Maybe I wasn't special. You didn't even mention me, our conversation. Also: I talk to strangers is a line in your Twitter bio. I talk to strangers. What the fuck is that, Beck? Children are not supposed to talk to strangers but you are an adult. Or is our conversation nothing to you? Am I just another stranger? Is your Twitter bio your subtle way of announcing that you're an attention whore who has no standards and will give audience to any poor schmuck who says hello? Was I nothing to you? You don't even mention the guy in the bookstore? Fuck, I thought, maybe I was wrong. Maybe we had nothing. But then I started to explore you and you don't write about what really matters. You wouldn't share me with your followers. Your online life is a variety show, so if anything, the fact that you didn't put me in your stand-up act means that you covet me. Maybe even more than I realize... ~ Caroline Kepnes

I'm not expecting the American literary community to welcome me with open arms. To them I'm just some schmuck kid who wrote some book. ~ Macaulay Culkin

I don't care who wins because I go to sporting events to scream. It's the one place on the planet you can shout anything you want. You can bellow at will, and nobody will bother you. I yell things like, 'My life sucks! Dan Quayle is a schmuck! If I don't have sex soon, I'm going to explode!' Parents turn to their kids as I leave the stadium and go, 'Hey, there goes a great fan. ~ Lewis Black

I grew up in the world of bad television, on my dad's sets and then as a young schmuck on dating shows and so on. ~ George Clooney

When in doubt, parenthesize. At the very least it will let some poor schmuck bounce on the % key in vi. ~ Larry Wall

Put two things together which have never been put together before, and some schmuck will buy it. ~ George Carlin

Last year was the fourth or fifth attempt to get fall launched till 'American Idol' comes in January. To be honest, the reality programming we had on last year was considered filler until we could get to the good stuff. It was meant to hopefully get us to January andor to November. To get past baseball. But (it) didn't work very well. ~ Mike Darnell

The Black Tower stands with the Lion of Andor.
-Logain ~ Robert Jordan

Community service has become a patch for morality. You can devote your life to community service and be a total schmuck. ~ Timothy Keller

Whoever came up with the ida of labeling classified documents with larger-than-life red stenciling that advertises - or at least hints at - the contents was a schmuck, I think. You might as well put a tag that says OPEN ME! on it. If it were up to me, I'd hide all secrets in back copies of Reader's Digest. ~ Christina Dalcher

Stardust," Jyn said. "It's that one."
"How do you know that?" Curiosity and urgency mixed in his voice, as if he wanted to say: Be sure.
Jyn was sure. "I know because it's me. ~ Alexander Freed

About the only good thing about being sex-starved and hornier than the blue wildebeest in mating season she'd once had to write an essay on, was the vast improvement on her pen-pal repertoire. Phone sex? Pah! Any schmuck could talk dirty and get off on it. The art of airmail sex, however, presented a much greater challenge and one she'd excelled at, if Mark's responses were anything to go by. It was a wonder the planes didn't catch fire. ~ Allie A. Burrow

He'd hate to start killing people at this stage in the game. Especially some poor schmuck who happened to marry the wrong woman. ~ Shelly Laurenston

Who should turn up but that long-lost schmuck of a Billy, and what did Charis do but rent him the other half of her duplex? It's enough to make you tear your hair out by its tiny grey roots, ~ Margaret Atwood

I made the decision when I came to Seagram that it had to be OK that my public persona would be bad. It's the downside of a family business: anything good is because I'm somebody's son; otherwise, I'm a schmuck. ~ Edgar Bronfman, Jr.

Know your load. That's rule numero uno in this business, which is why I make them count the penguins out in front of me one at a time. I'm not going to be the schmuck who shows up in Orlando two
birds short of a dinner party ... I know I'm pulling out of Houston with exactly forty-two Gentoo penguins, seventeen Jamaican land iguanas, four tuataras from New Zealand, and a pair of rare, civet-like mammals called linsangs. No more, no less. ~ Jacob M. Appel

I should say here that being chronically sleep-deprived is so demonstrably similar to being drunk that hospitals often feel like giant, ceaseless office Christmas parties. Except that at a Christmas party the schmuck standing next to you isn't about to fillet your pancreas with something called a hot knife. ~ Josh Bazell

And I'm left with this girl, this Siren of Mixed Signals, this Norah. She's a fuck-good kisser, but clearly has some massive consistency issues. I ask her how the fuck she knows Tris, because that is leaving me completely confused, and at first she's looking at me like I'm this guy she didn't just start kissing out of nowhere, but then she's got her hand on my arm in a way that makes me really notice I have an arm, and then she's making to run away, and at the same time looking at me like I'm some cancer child. Then I take hold of her arm and she resists without really resisting. Finally she pulls away, only to touch my face in this way that reminds me exactly of her kiss.Then she calls me you poor schmuck. ~ David Levithan