Hollis Quotes

This is an example of what Jung called "the regressive restoration of the persona," namely, the re-identification with a former position, role, ideology because it offers a predictable content, security, and script. In the face of the new and uncertain, we often return to the old place, which is why we so often stop growing. (It has become clear to me, for example, that aging itself does not bring wisdom. It often brings regression to childishness, dependency, and bitterness over lost opportunities. ~ James Hollis

I think people feel threatened by homosexuality. The problem isn't about gay people, the problem is about the attitude towards gay people. People think that all gays are Hannibal Lecters. But gay people are sons and daughters, politicians and doctors, American heroes and daughters of American heroes. ~ Hollis Stacy

I am one of the happiest gals you know because I choose it every single day. I choose to practice gratitude; I choose to surround myself with things and people who support positivity. ~ Rachel Hollis

I think we function better mentally, emotionally, and physically when we take care of our bodies with nourishment, water, and exercise. The lie I used to believe was that my weight would define me, that it would speak volumes about who I was as a person. Today I believe it's not your weight that defines you, but the care and consideration you put into your body absolutely does. ~ Rachel Hollis

Don't let anyone hold you back.
Decide that you will not be held back by anyone for any reason. Life is a forward moving force! ~ Michelle Word Hollis

I used to read those bits about finding your other half, and I totally bought into it. But that's not the way it works. Two half people don't make a whole. You've got to be completely whole on your own before you can be one half of anything. ~ Rachel Hollis

When men feel the wound that cannot heal, they either bury themselves in woman's arms and ask her for healing, which she cannot provide, or they hide themselves in macho pride and enforced loneliness. ~ James Hollis

Your integrity is the only thing they can't take away from you. ~ Rachel Hollis

Limiting beliefs are things we mistakenly hold as truths about ourselves. As they inform our identities, they give us permission to pursue certain dreams, act in a certain way, have confidence in our abilities, or think we do or don't have the right to do certain things. We think these are laws, that we have to learn to live within their bouns. But this is simply not the case. ~ Dave Hollis

The big man shrugged, "I don't know. You're pretty good with the cards. Tell me what the odds are."
[She] shifted her gaze to Michael, then back at Hollis. "This isn't a question of odds. Of all the men in the world, that woman chose you. If she's still out there, she's waiting for you. Staying alive any way she can until you find her. That's all that matters."
Everybody waited for what Hollis would next say. "You're a real ball-buster, you know that? ... Let me pack a few things. ~ Justin Cronin

Hunter scored a total beauty in the third," Hollis says from his stool. "I almost came in my pants."

"Don't be crude in front of the baby," I say immediately.

"Bro, you brought a baby to a bar. Go throw glass stones in your own house." When everyone snickers, Hollis is visibly confused. "What?"

"That's not the phrase," Hannah says helpfully.

"Sure it is."

"It's really not."

Hollis waves a hand. "You know nothing, Jon Snow. ~ Elle Kennedy

I cannot continue to live as half of myself simply because it's hard for others to handle all of me. ~ Rachel Hollis

No one can sad listening to Frankie Valli. ~ Rachel Hollis

The only requisite to entry into the Middle Passage is to have discovered that one does not know who one is, that there are no rescuers, no Mommy or Daddy, and that one's fellow travelers will do well to survive themselves. ~ James Hollis

...embrace the idea that not everyone can understand or approve of you, including those closest to you. ~ Rachel Hollis

Nobody gets to tell you how big your dreams can be. ~ Rachel Hollis

...dismayed that I would pass up true adventure for the sake of a fake one I'd never get around to inventing. ~ Hollis Gillespie

(It has become clear to me, for example, that aging itself does not bring wisdom. It often brings regression to childishness, dependency, and bitterness over lost opportunities. Only those who are still intellectually, emotionally, spiritually growing inherit the richness of aging.) ~ James Hollis

Spiritual crises happen to us every day. Most of them are sufficiently low grade, devoid of enduring consequences, so we pay no attention and keep on rolling. A spiritual crisis occurs when our identity, our roles, our values, or our road map are substantially called into question, prove ineffective, or are overwhelmed by experience that cannot be contained by our understandings of self and world. ~ James Hollis

The enemy wants to make you believe that you are powerless over the circumstance of life, that God or no one else loves you and that you are all alone, you are going to lose your mind or that you are not smart enough to get out of this one. I call this the Divide and Conquer Strategy; I believe this one of the enemy's most successful strategies. Simply because, if he can make be feel and believe that you are unloved, not needed, and alone; you become hopeless! But the enemy is a liar! and the Bible calls Him the Father of all lies. ~ Michelle Word Hollis

He offers a sheepish grin. "Remember that girl I was dating last year? Sheena? Well, she texted me a picture of her tits. Said I had to return the favor."

Dean's jaw falls open. "Dick for tits? Dude, you got played. No way are those even remotely comparable."

"What's the equivalent of tits then?" Hollis asks curiously.

"Balls," Dean declares, before taking a deep pull of the joint. He blows out a ring of smoke as everyone laughs at his remark.

"You just said women don't want to see balls," Hollis points out.

"They don't. But any idiot knows that a dick pic requires a full frontal shot in return." He rolls his eyes. "It's common sense. ~ Elle Kennedy

Until one morning, one of the coldest mornings of the year, when I came in with the book cart and found Jean Hollis Clark, a fellow librarian, standing dead still in the middle of the staff room.
"I heard a noise from the drop box," Jean said.
"What kind of noise?"
"I think it's an animal."
"A what?"
"An animal," Jean said. "I think there's an animal in the drop box."
That was when I heard it, a low rumble from under the metal cover. It didn't sound like an animal. It sounded like an old man clearing his throat.
Gurr-gug-gug. Gurr-gug-gug.
But the opening at the top of the chute was only a few inches wide, so that would be quite a squeeze for an old man. It had to be an animal. But what kind? I got down on my knees, reached over the lid, and hoped for a chipmunk.
What I got instead was a blast of freezing air. The night before, the temperature had reached minus fifteen degrees, and that didn't take into account the wind, which cut under your coat and squeezed your bones. And on that night, of all nights, someone had jammed a book into return slot, wedging it open. It was as cold in the box as it was outside, maybe colder, since the box was lined with metal. It was the kind of cold that made it almost painful to breathe.
I was still catching my breath, in fact, when I saw the kitten huddled in the front left corner of the box. It was tucked up in a little space underneath a book, so all I could see at first was its head. It loo ~ Vicki Myron

Like William Morris, Joe Hollis asks us to perceive paradise gardening as a juncture where artfulness directly serves life. In fact, we might go so far as to define this paradise as the place where art is indistinguishable from life, and where simplicity is codified as the best path for achieving happiness. ~ Jim Nollman

Third choice was to strike off toward some new projection - a new job, a better (different) relationship, a seductive ideology, or sometimes to drift into some unconscious "self-treatment plan" such as an addiction or an affair. ~ James Hollis

But things never go according to plan. In fact, I think if you're really attached to controlling your future, you should plan for the opposite of what you want just to confuse the cosmic comedians whose sole job is to figure out what you think your future should hold so they can preclude it from ever happening. ~ Hollis Gillespie

Our duty," he said, "is to catapult each other into greatness!" We are not great yet, but at least we sometimes experience moments of immeasurable glee. At least we are not wholly miserable every minute of the day, and we know we have made one another into what we are today. ~ Hollis Gillespie

He kisses me once more, on the forehead this time, and then he's gone. And I know I'm young, and fairly inexperienced where men are concerned, but I'm positive that even when I'm 90 years old I'll still remember exactly what it feels like to have his lips on my skin" ~Landon Brinkley ~ Rachel Hollis

Other people don't get to tell you what you can have!
Someone else doesn't get to tell you who you can be!
The world doesn't get to decide what you can try.
You are the only one who can make that decision. ~ Rachel Hollis

You're out there, Lespere. It's all over. It's just as if it had never happened, isn't it?"
"No."
"When anything's over, it's just like it never happened. Where's your life any better than mine, now? Now is what counts. Is it any better? Is it?"
"Yes, it's better!"
"How?"
"Because I got my thoughts, I remember!" cried Lespere, far away, indignant, holding his memories to his chest with both hands.
And he was right. With a feeling of cold water rushing through his head and body, Hollis knew he was right. There were differences between memories and dreams. He had only dreams of things he wanted to do, while Lespere had memories of things done and accomplished. And thus knowledge began to pull Hollis apart in slow, quivering precision.
"What good does it do you?" he cried to Lespere. "Now? When a thing's over it's not good any more. You're no better off than me."
"I'm resting easy," said Lespere. "I've had my turn. I'm not getting mean at the end, like you. ~ Ray Bradbury

Doubt is unsettling to the ego, and those who are drawn to ideologies that promise the dispelling of doubt by proffering certainties will never grow. In seeking certainty they are courting the death of the soul, whose nature is forever churning possibility, forever seeking the larger, forever riding the melting edge of certainty's glacier. ~ James Hollis

...the only thing worse than giving up is wishing you hadn't. ~ Rachel Hollis

We fatties have a bond, dude. It's like a secret society. We got all kinds of shit you don't know about. Handshakes, special fat people dances-we got these secret fugging lairs in the center of the earth and we go down there in the middle of the night when all the skinny kids are sleeping and eat cake and friend chicken and shit. Why d'you think Hollis is still sleeping, kafir? Because we were up all night in the secret lair injecting butter frosting into our veins ... A fatty trusts another fatty. ~ John Green

This was in the good old days, when monsters were fantasy. ~ Hollis Seamon

The "gift" of tragedy is not destruction, but humility ~ James Hollis

Surely the greatest tragedy for men in regard to the feminine principle is that their fear alienates them from their own anima, the principle of relatedness, feeling and connection to the life force. This alienation from self obliges alienation from other men as well. Often their only connection with each other comes through superficial talk about outer events, such as sports and politics. ~ James Hollis

Christmas Eve Punch Ingredients 2 cups water ¾ cup sugar ½ teaspoon ground cinnamon 4 cups chilled cranberry/apple juice 1 46-ounce can chilled pineapple juice 1 liter chilled ginger ale In a large saucepan bring your water, sugar, and cinnamon to a boil, stirring to dissolve the sugar. Chill. Before you serve, add the sugar water mixture, chilled juices, and ginger ale to a large punch bowl. Serve in party glasses over ice. ~ Lee Hollis

The LPGA is basically corporate America's dinner party, and they can invite whomever they want. They're not ready for people getting up and making declarations. The bottom line is corporate America is pretty homophobic. ~ Hollis Stacy

I was living my entire life waiting for a moment to be special enough for me to look, feel and act my best, and the truth is, you don't need a special moment, or any reason at all, to do that. If not now, then when? This saying became my mantra and the answer to a dozen different questions.

Should we eat off the nice wedding china or paper plates?
Should I dress up for a date with my husband or just wear jeans again?
Bake some cookies for the neighbors?

The answers to all of these questions is the same: If not now, then when? You could spend forever planning out your someday when right now, today, this second, this is all you've got. Someday isn't guaranteed! ~ Rachel Hollis

The purpose of therapy is not to remove suffering but to move through it to an enlarged consciousness that can sustain the polarity of painful opposites. ~ James Hollis

Could a werewolf eat a baby whole, in one bite?" asked Anthony. "I suppose one could," Hollis said. Actually, he knew that one could. Firsthand. Heh heh. "So when it pooped out the baby, would the baby be a werepoopwolf?" "What if a werepoopwolf bit a werewolfwolfskunkdeer?" "It would be a werewolfwolfwolfpoopskunkdeer. ~ Blake Crouch

The transient vacuities of our cultural icons - success, peace, happiness, and distraction - pale before the question of whether or not one experiences this life as meaningful. ~ James Hollis

Fear of our own depths is the enemy. ~ James Hollis

Someone else's opinion of you is none of your business! ~ Rachel Hollis

The modern family is one in which the divergent values of our separate souls are supported, valued, encouraged. Diversity is not just tolerated, it is affirmed as the radical gift of relationship. Conflict is mediated with accepting love despite disagreement, and no one carries the assigned burden of becoming something other than what they are. ~ James Hollis

How many of those who are insecure seek power over others as a compensation for inadequacy and wind up bringing consequences down upon their heads and those around them? How many hide out in their lives, resist the summons to show up, or live fugitive lives, jealous, projecting onto others, and then wonder why nothing ever really feels quite right. How many proffer compliance with the other, buying peace at the price of soul, and wind up with neither? ~ James Hollis

Don't make excuses; accept responsibility.
You must take responsibility for how you respond to everything that happens in your life; whether you cause it or not. Making excuses is a weak response! ~ Michelle Word Hollis

You men deserve whatever rabbit-boiling scenario dating crazy women gets you. ~ Rachel Hollis

A film is a machine made of images ~ Hollis Frampton

The meaning of the midlife affair is the imperative to go back and pick up what was left behind in one's development. Since what was undeveloped agitates from below consciousness, it is still unknown. ~ James Hollis

A specter is haunting the cinema: the specter of narrative. If that apparition is an Angel, we must embrace it; and if it is a Devil, then we must cast it out. But we cannot know what it is until we have met it face to face. ~ Hollis Frampton

There were differences between memories and dreams. He had only dreams of things he had wanted to do, while Lespere had memories of things done and accomplished. And this knowledge began to pull Hollis apart, with a slow, quivering precision. ~ Ray Bradbury

Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of being well-preserved, but to skid sideways, chocolate in one hand, wine in the other, still screaming, 'Whoo what a ride! ~ Theresa Hollis

I was a hotshot as a junior. When I was 18, I really got into fiddling around. I completely lost interest in golf, and I guess all I could think about was going to college, getting married and having babies. ~ Hollis Stacy

The truth is, all of life is a grand, blooming ambiguity. ~ James Hollis

Y'all really think Ms. Shakur, or Ms. Wallace,
Or Ms. Mizell from out in Hollis
Wouldn't exchange the love and fame
Attached to their loved ones' names
Just to have 'em still alive in their arms? ~ Kelvin Mercer

We can simply adjust our posture to consider a wider, more inclusive community. If we adjust our posture, it will change the way we speak. If we adjust our posture, it will change the way we listen. If we adjust our posture, we will see the person, not the category they fall into. ~ Rachel Hollis

David McKay, 1900. Wolfe, Thomas. Look Homeward, Angel. New York: Simon and Schuster, 1929. Yeats, William Butler. A Vision ~ James Hollis

In the second half of life, the questions become: 'Who, apart from the roles you play, are you? What does the soul ask of you? Do you have the wherewithal to shift course, to deconstruct your painfully achieved identity, risking failure, marginalization and loss of collective approval?' No small task. ~ James Hollis

Hollis Copper knows that everyone has a story and if you want to speak to someone, you better find a way to speak to his or her story. ~ Chuck Wendig

Dreams are things you hope for, for your life. Dreams are the things that occur to you as you go about your day. ~ Rachel Hollis

We were all like a gaggle of hermit crabs without shells, flopping around trying to find ourselves. Instead we found each other, and that's just as good, I guess. ~ Hollis Gillespie

She reminded him of a china doll, tiny and fragile. A rarity to be guarded and treasured. He recognized her worth, even if no one else understood her value. ~ Kristal Hollis

It's usually our opposites who complement us best, because they're the only ones who can balance us out. ~ Rachel Hollis

The world is more magical, less predictable, more autonomous, less controllable, more varied, less simple, more infinite, less knowable, more wonderfully troubling than we could have imagined being able to tolerate when we were young. ~ James Hollis

It's like algebra, that's all. I just have to figure it out, step by step. ~ Hollis Seamon

I realize that's why we play golf, to hit the ball into the hole. But it is a strange feeling when you hit the shot and it actually goes in. ~ Hollis Stacy

Maturity isn't something you wrap around you like a coat. Maturity is like the T-shirt you get for walking in a 5K: you can only put it on if you go through the experience first. ~ Rachel Hollis

I can't see anyone coming out, because the players feel it is no one's business. We all stick together. We're a very tight group. It would be too hard for just one person to do, too stressful. And why should it make a difference? The LPGA is about golf. ~ Hollis Stacy

The artist, viewing his fellows through his personal vision, has through the ages attempted to portray what he sees and to present his understanding of it. Censorship in his case has perpetrated heavy and sometimes reprehensible blunders. ~ Hollis Alpert

What I want to say is that we all judge each other, but even though we all do it, that's not an excuse. Judging is still one of the most hurtful, spiteful impulses we own, and our judgments keep us from building a stronger tribe...or having a tribe in the first place. Our judgment prohibits us from beautiful, life-affirming friendships. Our judgment keeps us from connecting in deeper, richer ways because we're too stuck on the surface-level assumptions we've made. Our judging has to stop. ~ Rachel Hollis

See that's where you're wrong baby. When you find your man, it's almost too easy. Gettin' married and havin' a mortgage, kids and a business to run and findin' a way to stay in love day in day out, that's the tougher part. But the beginning' ... that parts easy as pie. That's why they call it fallin' because it happens before you have time to stop yourself. ~ Rachel Hollis

God has perfect timing, and it's highly possible that by not being where you thought you should be, you will end up exactly where you're meant to go. ~ Rachel Hollis

...someone else is praying to have the kind of chaos you're currently crying about. ~ Rachel Hollis

The best thing we can do for our relationships with others . . . is to render our relationship to ourselves more conscious. This is not a narcissistic activity. In fact, it will prove to be the most loving thing we can do for the Other. The greatest gift to others is our own best selves. Thus, paradoxically, if we are to serve relationship well, we are obliged to affirm our individual journey. - JAMES HOLLIS The Eden Project ~ Neil Strauss

People treat you with as much, or as little respect as you allow them to. ~ Rachel Hollis

To my mind, any phenomenon is para-cinematic if it shares one element with cinema, e.g. modularity with respect to space or time. ~ Hollis Frampton

Your life is supposed to be a journey from one unique place to another; it's not supposed to be a merry-go-round that brings you back to the same spot over and over again. ~ Rachel Hollis

My uncertainty is proof that I was trying to grow. ~ Rachel Hollis

I am successful because I have never once believed my dreams were someone else's to manage. That's the incredible part about your dreams: nobody gets to tell you how big they can be. ~ Rachel Hollis

How different the world would be if each parent could say to the child: "Who you are is terrific, all you are meant to be. And who you are, as you are, is loved by all of us. You have a source within, which is the soul, and it will express itself to you through what we call desire. Always respect the well-being of the other, but live your own journey, serve that desire, risk being that which wishes to enter the world through you, and you will always have our love, even if your path takes you away from us." Such persons would then have a powerful tool to enable them to change their lives when it was not working out for them. Such persons would be able to make difficult decisions, mindful always of the impact on others, but also determined to live the life intended by the gods who brought us here. ~ James Hollis

Whatever sex is, and it is at least a profound mystery, is easily misused. The primary psychological purpose of sex for those men who spend their lives in the cold, cruel world, and whose relationship with their own anima is frigid, is to reconnect with a warm place. Sex is a form of emotional reassurance, a narcotic to still the pain of the bruised soul. If life batters them, then sex, like drugs or work, may numb the wound. The sexual act offers a momentary transcendence. Orgasm can be an ecstatic experience; for the moment one may feel outside the iron confines of ordinary consciousness. It is the closest many men ever come to a religious experience. Thus the act of sex may mask a desperate search for acceptance, underneath whiсh lurks the mother complex. ~ James Hollis

As the child once fantasized that its wishes governed the world, and the youth fantasized that heroism could manage to do it all, so the person in the second half of life is obliged to come to a more sober wisdom based on a humbled sense of personal limitations and the inscrutability of the world. ~ James Hollis

This is the worst! Worse than that time I finished all the books that had been published so far in a series a full year before the final book came out. ~ Rachel Hollis

Have a blast while you last. ~ Hollis Stacy

Anger is generally seen as an unwelcome presence in our midst, however natural it may be. Although each person, and each society, is charged with how anger is to be appropriately channeled, the denial of anger, or its continuous repression, is a deep source of our psychopathology and will invariably seek its expression in a less healthful fashion. ~ James Hollis

most people just consider her to be a twenty-one-year-old girl without a major, a partner, or any life plans. People keep trying to force this idea on her that if she doesn't get her life together before her thirties, she will be useless to the world. ~ M. Hollis

If you start responding to every stimulus, then you end up as a nerve gas case, quite literally. Neurons fire at once. ~ Hollis Frampton

Teachers Lounge is a web series I co-created with Hollis James. We intentionally left the apostrophe out to turn Lounge into a verb. The show is about teachers lounging around, wasting time. ~ Ted Alexandro

Aria: I went to Hollis. Because I was looking for ... you know. Her. She was teaching an art class, so I ran inside, grabbed a paintbrush, and painted a scarlet A across her chest. You know, like that woman in The Scarlet Letter? It was awesome. She didn't know what hit her. And then I said, 'Now everyone will know what you've done'.
Ella: Do you realize that Hester Prynne is supposed to be a sympathetic character? ~ Sara Shepard

Death is only one way of dying; living partially, living fearfully, is our more common, daily collusion with death. ~ James Hollis

One of the most powerful shocks of the Middle Passage is the collapse of our tacit contract with the universe–the assumption that if we act correctly, if we are of good heart and good intentions, things will work out. We assume a reciprocity with the universe. If we do our part, the universe will comply. Many ancient stories, including the Book of Job, painfully reveal the fact that there is no such contract, and everyone who goes through the Middle Passage is made aware of it. ~ James Hollis

Jung has so eloquently written of this biblical admonition: Acceptance of oneself is the essence of the moral problem and the acid test of one's whole outlook on life. That I feed the beggar, that I forgive an insult, that I love my enemy in the name of Christ - all these are undoubtedly great virtues. What I do unto the least of my brethren, that I do unto Christ. But what if I should discover that the least amongst them all, the poorest of all beggars, the most impudent of all offenders, yea the very fiend himself - that these are within me, and that I myself stand in need of the alms of my own kindness, that I myself am the enemy who must be loved - what then?48 ~ James Hollis

The guys that I played with, Hollis Dixon and the Keynotes - just about all the great musicians from Muscle Shoals.We played fraternity parties and kids' dances. They were called "lead outs" for kids in high school. We played wherever we could - in the down time when you weren't recording, people had to make money. ~ Donnie Fritts

Why do we work so hard to feel so terrible. ~ Hollis Stacy

If you're going to blame your hard times for all the things that are wrong in your life, you better also blame them for the good stuff too!"

Rachel Hollis, Girl, Wash Your Face: Stop Believing the Lies About Who You Are so You Can Become Who You Were Meant to Be ~ Rachel Hollis

What if you believed that everything in life was like a prize? What if you thought of the world as a big random drawing, and you were always winning things, the world offering them up with a big grin, like an emcee's: Here you go, Hollis. Here is a motorcycle. Here is a little boy who loves you. Here is a weird experience, here is something bad that you should mull over because it will make you a better person. What if you could think that life was this free vacation you'd won, and you won just because you happened to be alive? ~ Dan Chaon

You need to be healthy. You don't need to be thin. You don't need to be a certain size or shape or look good in a bikini. You need to be able to run without feeling like you're going to puke. You need to be able to walk up a flight of stairs without getting winded. You need to drink half your body weight in ounces of water every single day. You need to stretch and get good sleep and stop medicating every ache and pain. You need to stop filling your body with garbage like Diet Coke and fast food and lattes that are a million and a half calories. You need to take in fuel for you body that hasn't been processed and fuel for you mind that is positive and encouraging. You need to get up off the sofa or out of the bed and move around. Get out of the fog that you have been living in and see your life for what it is. ~ Rachel Hollis

Men today cannot claim their identity via culture because they are obliged to find other uninitiated males as their models or succumb to the empty values of a materialistic society. Again, before healing may begin, men must acknowledge the reality of what lies within. Among those confusing emotions is a deep grief for the loss of the personal father as companion, model and support, and a deep hunger for the fathers as a source of wisdom, solace and inspiration. ~ James Hollis

Imagine all of the things you would have missed today if you'd only been out here for yourself. ~ Rachel Hollis

So, then, now you know your task: to become what the gods want, not what your parents want, not what your tribe wants, but what the gods want, and what your psyche will support if consciousness so directs. ~ James Hollis