Sorin Suciu Quotes

Simon did not solve problems, he just shamed them into going away.

Her assignment had been to write a simple Sumerian code for preserving a jar of pickled eggs. (To the programming-inclined reader, this is the magical equivalent of "HELLO WORLD.")

Merkin had used only one drop of the "just soap." Two drops would have made her Master walk slightly awkwardly. Three drops would have made a Victorian gentleman utter something really lustful, such as "you transfix me quite.

FEBRIZIUM();" said Buggeroff, and the foul smell immediately disappeared as if by, well − Magic.

The conversation had been so lacking in quality that it actually made Toddlers and Tiaras look like good entertainment by comparison.

He acts like he's in one of those Hollywood movies where after spending a couple of weeks with the natives in a remote Amazonian village, the white explorer is already debating the nature of the universe with the Chief in passable lingo. Except that in the movie, he ends up shagging the prize virgin whose body looks as if the jungle is really just a spa. What he doesn't know is that ten years down the road, she will wind up looking like all the other women in the village: saggy tits, rotten teeth, and about as supple as a mother of eight can be.

Tuesdays are the worst. They are the spoiled leftovers of Mondays, repackaged with a new expiry date.

Without language to give them shape, memories are just like houses with no walls. They're merely events seeking to chain themselves together into causes and effects; survival unhindered by narrative.

He was a good storyteller, but he told the kind of stories that made children run away from the village and adults look for a length of rope and some soap.

He spoke in a trembling voice that didn't seem to be entirely in sync with the movement of his lips. That's because sound travels slower in halitosis.

It probably wasn't entirely her fault that she was such a bitter person. Having a name like Grace can be a serious stigma, especially when nature has endowed you with about as much charm as that of a disillusioned walrus.

Let's see, you will need a project plan, resource allocation, a timeline, test cycles, a budget, a contingency budget, lots of diagrams, flowcharts, a media release, a strategic vision, a charter, technical specifications, business rules, travel expenses, a development environment, deployment instructions, a user acceptance test, stationary, overtime schedule, a mock-up, prototypes ... "
"Tell me," she said, "did the people who built the pyramids have any of those?"
"Mostly, they had beer. Come to think of it, if there had been such a thing as a Business Analyst in ancient Egypt, then the hieroglyph for it would have been very graphical, if you know what I mean.

Master Dung's study was silent. So silent, in fact, that one might have been able to hear a gnat passing air, if only an obligingly flatulent gnat had happened nearby.

Love can be just like hot peppers, exciting on the way in and agonizing on the way out.

The coding was anachronistic, kind of like bokeh in a renaissance painting.

An Irish pub, such as you have seen a thousand times before. The kind where the emphasis is on the "ish" rather than on the proud name of Éire.

You learned a lot by playing RPGs, although not all of it was useful, or real for that matter – unless you really believed that wolves normally carry seven gold pieces, a flawed garnet, a scroll of ice storm, and a lock pick somewhere about their person.

Let's just say that once the party was over, the Tribe had the decency to put most of the things back into place with the possible, and otherwise notable, exception of the platypus and a moronic drinking game that later evolved into the imperial measurement system.