The Trouble With Women Quotes

The trouble with women umpires is that I couldn't argue with one. I'd put my arms around her and give her a little kiss. ~ Casey Stengel

The Gems did not nag or complain, did not get periods or PMT, did not get pregnant, did not get body odour or hair, did not have discharge or bad breath, no shit or urine, did not get spots, did not suffer from diseases or headaches, did not have annoying bad habits, never farted, belched, vomited or picked their noses, did not need drugs or alcohol, did not need gifts such as jewellery, flowers, chocolate and money, did not need to shop, did not have piercings or tattoos, had no capacity to willingly lie or be fake, were never disloyal, were always eager to do any task required by their owner, sexual or non-sexual, did all the housework and cooking without complaint, were produced in the form of the perfect woman in the eyes of each client, did not constantly require their man to tell them they loved them, but most of all they did not age. ~ Robert Black

The trouble with women is, that when they grow up, they turn into their mothers. The trouble with men is, that they don't. ~ Oscar Wilde

The trouble with women is that they talk too much. It would be good if human beings would keep as silent as this cat. ~ Soseki Natsume

The trouble with women is men; the trouble with men, men. ~ Mignon McLaughlin

I'll keep the girl out of trouble," Gray said, in what seemed to him a rather magnanimous gesture. "I'll watch out for her."
"Oh, I've no doubt you will. But who's going to watch out for you?"
Gray's nerves prickled. So, it wasn't the girl Joss was concerned about. No, he expected Gray to cock it all up.
"Right, Joss. I'm an unprincipled, lecherous bastard." He paused, waiting for his brother to argue otherwise.
He didn't.
Gray protested. "She's a governess, for the love of gold. Prim, proper, starched, dull." Soft, he thought in counterpoint. Delicate, sweet. Intriguing.
"Ah. So you'll dally with any chambermaid or serving wench who'll lift her skirts, but you'd draw the line at seducing a governess?"
"Yes. Have a look at me, man." Gray smoothed his brushed velvet lapel, then gestured upward at the banners trimming the freshly tarred rigging. "Look at this ship. I'm telling you, my libertine days are over. I've gone respectable."
"It's easy to change your coat. It's a great deal harder to change your ways. ~ Tessa Dare

I think about my daughter now, and what she was spared. Sometimes I feel grateful. The doctor said she didn't feel a thing, went straight into a coma. Then, somewhere in that blackness, she slipped off into another, deeper kind. Isn't that a beautiful way to go out, painlessly as a happy child?
Trouble with dying later is you've already grown up. The damage is done. It's too late. You got kids? I think of the hubris it must take, to yank a soul out of non-existence into this meat; a force of life into this thresher. As to my daughter, she spared me the sin of being a father. ~ Rust Cohle True Detective

The most successful prostitutes are invisible, because the sign of a prostitute's success is her absolute blending with the environment. She's so shrewd, she never becomes visible. She never gets in trouble. She has command of her life, and her clients. ~ Camille Paglia

I loved creating a series about the four Cabot sisters, who were not content to let their destinies be dictated to them. In 'The Trouble With Honor,' this desire became especially urgent when the sisters were faced with the prospect of losing their place in society. Eldest sister Honor led the charge. They were undaunted! ~ Julia London

When you have trouble getting out of bed in the morning, remember that your defining characteristic-what defines a human being-is to work with others. ~ Marcus Aurelius

The black, hungry roses that Redd sent snaking towards the princess were easily squashed, the orbs and and unmanned, airborne blades of effortlessly waved off, and the spears of black energy (Alyss was flattered, her aunt borrowing this idea from her) pinned motionless to the air by Alyss's own white spears with no trouble. ~ Frank Beddor

Speaking generally, sociability stands in inverse ratio with age. A little child raises a piteous cry of fright if it is left alone for only a few minutes; and later on, to be shut up by itself is a great punishment. Young people soon get on very friendly terms with one another; it is only the few among them of any nobility of mind who are glad now and then to be alone; - but to spend the whole day thus would be disagreeable. A grown-up man can easily do it; it is little trouble to him to be much alone, and it becomes less and less trouble as he advances in years. An old man who has outlived all his friends, and is either indifferent or dead to the pleasures of life, is in his proper element in solitude; and in individual cases the special tendency to retirement and seclusion will always be in direct proportion to intellectual capacity. For ~ Arthur Schopenhauer

Lori's stomach let out a growl of anticipation as she walked up Jenny's front path, the smell coming from inside was mouth-watering, and having only eating a few slices of bread she was ravenous.
Just as Lori went to knock on the door, Jenny pulled it open with a flourish. Dressed in head to toe paisley, great swathes of silk and chiffon billowed around her.
'Va va voom! You look absolutely stunning darling. Now come straight in and help me with Skippy. I'm having a little trouble getting him into the oven. ~ Bec Johnson

To have a goddess like you in his arms and not appreciate it…"
He kissed her, unable to resist the lush, succulent mouth so close to his. He put everything he felt into it, so he could wipe out any hurt the Neds of the world had given her.
When he broke away, realizing he was treading dangerous ground, she said hoarsely, "You weren't always so…appreciative. When I said that men enjoyed my company, you said you found that hard to believe."
"What?" he retorted with a scowl. "I never said any such thing."
"Yes, you did, the day that I asked you to investigate my suitors. I remember it clearly."
"There's no way in hell I ever…" The conversation came back to him suddenly, and he shook his head. "You're remembering only part, sweeting. You said that men enjoyed your company and considered you easy to talk to. It was the last part I found hard to believe."
"Oh." She eyed him askance. "Why? You never seem to have trouble talking to me. Or rather, lecturing me."
"It's either lecture you or stop up your mouth with kisses," he said dryly. "Talking to you isn't easy, because every time I'm near you I burn to carry you off to some secluded spot and do any number of wicked things with you."
She blinked, then gazed at him with such softness that at made his chest hurt. "Then why don't you?"
"Because you're a marquess's daughter and my employer's sister."
"What does that signify? You're an assistant magistrate and a famous Bow Street Runner-" ~ Sabrina Jeffries

I picked up scallop shells in diverse colors and sizes - warm reds and yellows; cool, stippled grays - and reflected on the diversity of God's creation, and what might be the use and meaning of his making so many varieties of a single thing. If he created scallops simply for our nourishment, why paint each shell with delicate and particular colors? And why, indeed, trouble making so many different things to nourish us, when in the Bible we read that a simple manna fed the Hebrews day following day? It came to me then that God must desire us to use each of our senses, to take delight in the varied tastes and sights and textures of his world. ~ Geraldine Brooks

I have trouble with modern art. But in general, all art forms fascinate me - art is the way human beings express what we can't say in words. ~ Andrea Bocelli

You need to find yourself a new eye doctor. Trenton just happens to have one."
Her eyes moved to him,then back to the cup she'd managed to get hold of. "There's nothing wrong with my vision," she replied indignantly.
"You're as blind as a bat."
"What an unkind thing to say," she said with a humph.
"You get top honors on unkind remarks, Missy. I'm just stating the obvious."
"Which isn't the least bit true."
"Isn't it? How many fingers am I holding up?" When she said nothing, he added, "Uh-huh,I rest my case."
She lowered her head a bit,conceding, he thought, until she replied triumphantly, "Three."
He mumbled under his breath. "You were guessing."
"And you have trouble admitting when you're wrong,don't you? ~ Johanna Lindsey

Funny, isn't it? The airlines go to all that trouble to keep you from taking a gun on board, then they just hand you a dinner roll you could kill a musk ox with. ~ Dave Barry

To Lillian's surprise, she had been seated near the head of Lord Westcliff's table, only three places away from his right hand. Occupying a place so close to the host was a mark of high favor, very seldom given to an unmarried girl with no rank. Wondering if the footman had make a mistake in seating her there, she glanced cautiously at the faces of those guests nearest her, and saw that they too were puzzled by her presence. Even the countess, who was being seated at the very end of the table, stared at her with a frown.
Lillian gave Lord Westcliff a questioning glance as he took his place at the head of the table. One of his dark brows arched. "Is something amiss? You seem a bit perturbed, Miss Bowman."
The correct response would probably have been to blush and thank him for the unexpected honor. But as Lillian stared at his face, which was softened by the influence of candleglow, she found herself answering with brazen frankness. "I am wondering why I am sitting near the head of the table. In light of what happened this morning, I assumed you would have me seated all the way out on the back terrace."
There was a moment of utter silence as the guests around them registered shock that Lillian would so openly refer to the conflict between them. However, Westcliff astonished them all by laughing quietly, his gaze locked with hers. After a moment, the others joined in with forced chuckles.
"Knowing of your penchant for trouble, Miss Bowman, I have conclud ~ Lisa Kleypas

None of it seemed very real, but I suppose that's the trouble with
history. It's the one thing we have to make up for ourselves. ~ Peter Ackroyd

A person's faith goes at its own pace. The trouble with church is the service. A service is conducted for a mass audience. Just when I start to like the hymn, everyone plops down to pray. Just when I start to hear the prayer, everyone pops up to sing. And what does the stupid sermon have to do with God? Who knows what God thinks of current events? Who cares? ~ John Irving

The implications of our obstacle are theoretical
they exist in the past and the future. We live in the moment. And the more we embrace that, the easier the obstacle will be to face and move. You can take the trouble you're dealing with and use it as an opportunity to focus on the present moment. To ignore the totality of your situation and learn to be content with what happens, as it happens. To have no "way" that the future needs to be to confirm your predictions, because you didn't make any. To let each new moment be a refresh wiping clear what came before and what others were hoping would come next. ~ Ryan Holiday

The trouble with not having a goal is that you can spend your life running up and down the field and never score. ~ Bill Copeland

Trouble in our family is spelled with a capital C and has been as long as I can remember. The C stands for Charles. He's my older brother, two years and four months older to be exact. Ever since the phone call about him last night, I've felt incredibly tense. And now, at this very minute, my parents are driving up to Vermont, to Charles's boarding school, to find out if he's actually been kicked out or if he's just been suspended again. I ~ Judy Blume

Should we tell your father I'm his date for the evening, or should I just surprise him?" She pulls out a piece of tomato, inspects it, scrapes something off it, then sticks it back on the hamburger.
"He won't notice," Hilary says. "He can't even tell me and Lily apart, and look at us. Just look at us."
"My dad never calls me by the right name," I say. "Only by my older sisters'. Sometimes he'll call me 'honey' really awkwardly. He's not the honey type, but it gets him out of having to remember my name."
Phoebe says, "All parents have trouble with names. I'm an only child, and my dad sometimes stops and says, 'Uh, you. ~ Claire LaZebnik

You repay the debt," he said. "That should be more than enough."

"What if I disagree? And what if, after all your trouble, I still say no?"

"I have ways to insist."

"I have ways to decline."

"You'll pay one way or the other," he said.

"In euros? Dollars? How much do I owe you?"

If he registered the sarcasm, he didn't react to it. "You pay in the only currency that holds value to you," he said. "You pay in innocent life."


The words stung like a hard smack across the face and her eyes smarted as if she'd been physically struck. He should not know these things.


Casual indifference remained plastered on her face while deep below, in that hollow crevice where madness had lain dormant these last nine months, the slow, steady percussion of war tapped out, faint but perceptible.


"Which innocents?" she said.

He waved his hand with that dismissive gesture. "Innocents are innocents," he said.
"Is one life really valued higher than another?"


From the fear bubbling to the surface, she instinctively knew. Knew that the only way a man in his position could gloat as if he owned her was if he held what she deemed most priceless. ~ Taylor Stevens

Pain of the past never goes away, you just find a way to deal with it. And in the future ... all the promise it holds ... that's what keeps you moving forward, and out of the darkness. ~ Samantha Towle

Two imperfect people can make a perfect moment. ~ Rachel Morgan

If you knew the trouble we've had because Howl will keep falling in love like this! We've had lawsuits, and suitors with swords, and mothers with rolling pins, and fathers and uncles with cudgels. And aunts. Aunts are terrible. They go for you with hat pins. ~ Diana Wynne Jones

Strauss, Neil: "'The trouble with most of us is that we would rather be ruined by praise than saved by criticism.' - Norman Vincent Peale ~ Timothy Ferriss

He fell in with the quiet revolutionaries on campus - those who felt that the disenfranchisement of half the population was ridiculous, those who did not accept that rights were predicated on skin tone - partly because he couldn't bring himself to avoid tempting trouble. He agreed with all their points, but understood that they were freer to make them purely because they had the money to build a wall around their experiences. That was what people did, wasn't it? Ignore the majority of experience and actively disengage from those telling them otherwise. ~ Thomm Quackenbush

Now, see, that's why you want Internet friends. You can find people just exactly like you. Screw your neighbors and your family, too messy ... the trouble is, once you filter out everybody that doesn't agree with you, all that's left is maybe this one retired surfer guy living in Idaho. ~ Barbara Kingsolver

We flatter those we scarcely know, We please the fleeting guest; And deal full many a thoughtless blow, To those who love us best. Laugh, and the world laughs with you; Weep, and you weep alone; For the sad old earth must borrow its mirth, But has trouble enough of its own. There is new strength, repose of mind, and inspiration in fresh apparel. ~ Ella Wheeler Wilcox

Darcy: 'I certainly have not the talent which some people possess, of conversing easily with those I have never seen before. I cannot catch their tone of conversation, or appear interested in their concerns, as I often see done.'
Elizabeth:'My fingers do not move over this instrument in the masterly manner which I see so many women's do. They have not the same force or rapidity, and do not produce the same expression. But then I have always supposed it to be my own fault
because I would not take the trouble of practicing. It is not that I do not believe my fingers as capable as any other woman's of superior execution. ~ Jane Austen

Lots of people wrote to the magazine to say that Marilyn vos Savant was wrong, even when she explained very carefully why she was right. Of the letters she got about the problem, 92% said that she was wrong and lots of these were from mathematicians and scientists. Here are some of the things they said: 'I'm very concerned with the general public's lack of mathematical skills. Please help by confessing your error.' -Robert Sachs, Ph.D., George Mason University ... 'I am sure you will receive many letters from high school and college students. Perhaps you should keep a few addresses for future columns.' -W. Robert Smith, Ph.D., Georgia State University ... 'If all those Ph.D.'s were wrong, the country would be in very serious trouble.' -Everett Harman, Ph.D., U.S. Army Research Institute ~ Mark Haddon

What an extraordinary episode in the economic progress of man that age was which came to an end in August 1914! The greater part of the population, it is true, worked hard and lived at a low standard of comfort, yet were, to all appearances, reasonably contented with this lot. But escape was possible, for any man of capacity or character at all exceeding the average, into the middle and upper classes, for whom life offered, at a low cost and with the least trouble, conveniences, comforts, and amenities beyond the compass of the richest and most powerful monarchs of other ages.

The inhabitant of London could order by telephone, sipping his morning tea in bed, the various products of the whole earth, in such quantity as he might see fit, and reasonably expect their early delivery upon his doorstep; he could at the same moment and by the same means adventure his wealth in the natural resources and new enterprises of any quarter of the world, and share, without exertion or even trouble, in their prospective fruits and advantages; or he could decide to couple the security of his fortunes with the good faith of the townspeople of any substantial municipality in any continent that fancy or information might recommend. He could secure forthwith, if he wished it, cheap and comfortable means of transit to any country or climate without passport or other formality, could despatch his servant to the neighbouring office of a bank for such supply of the precious metals as might ~ John Maynard Keynes

The whole trouble with the Republicans is their fear of an increase in income tax, especially on higher incomes. They speak of it almost like a national calamity. I really believe if it come to a vote whether to go to war with England, France and Germany combined, or raise the rate on incomes of over $100,000, they would vote war. ~ Will Rogers

Bolick. "Mrs. Finnemore was sound asleep in the downstairs bedroom, she heard nothing, and at some point she got up to check on April. That's when she realized she was gone." Theo looked at Mrs. Finnemore, who again shot him a fierce look. He knew the truth, and she knew he knew the truth. Trouble was, Theo couldn't tell the truth because he'd made a promise to April. The truth was that Mrs. Finnemore had not been home for the past two nights. April had been living alone, terrified, with all the doors and windows locked as tightly as possible; with a chair jammed against her bedroom door; with an old baseball bat across the end of her ~ John Grisham

The trouble with entering the upper echelon is you have to work harder to stay there. ~ John Jay Osborn Jr.

Freedom is the very essence of our nation. To be sure, ours is not a perfect nation. But even with our troubles, we remain the beacon of hope for oppressed peoples everywhere. Never give up the fight for freedom - a fight which, though it may never end, is the most ennobling known to man. ~ Ronald Reagan

So she was considering, in her own mind (as well as she could, for the hot day made her feel very sleepy and stupid), whether the pleasure of making a daisy-chain would be worth the trouble of getting up and picking the daisies, when suddenly a White Rabbit with pink eyes ran close by her. ~ Lewis Carroll

Well I see you there with the rose in your teeth
One more thin gypsy thief
Yes, and thanks, for the trouble you took from her eyes
I thought it was there for good so I never tried.
And Jane came by with a lock of your hair
She said that you gave it to her
That night that you planned to go clear ~ Leonard Cohen

Most people who don't feel content with their lives don't know the reason why. Often they suspect that circumstances or other people are to blame. Even honest and self-aware individuals who know the problem lies inside of them still may have trouble getting to the root of the issue. They ask themselves, "Why am I this way?" They desire to change, but they don't do anything differently so that they can change. They merely hope things will turn out all right - and they become frustrated when they don't. Recognize that only when you make the right changes to your thinking do other things begin to turn out right in your life. ~ John C. Maxwell

If I had my way," Dionysus said, "I would cause your molecules to erupt in flames. We'd sweep up the ashes and be done with a lot of trouble. But Chiron seems to feel this would be against my mission at this cursed camp: to keep you little brats safe from harm."
"Spontaneous combustion is a form of harm, Mr. D," Chiron put in.
"Nonsense," Dionysus said. "Boy wouldn't feel a thing. Nevertheless, I've agreed to restrain myself. I'm thinking of turning you into a dolphin instead, sending you back to your father. ~ Rick Riordan

Besides, she likes my stories. They are like fairy tales, I suppose, full of kings and queens and adventures. Ma says people think fairy tales are simple stories but they are not. I guess I agree. My trouble is I have no talent for thinking up plots. The best I can do is come up with a good beginning. My book of story ideas is really just a book of story beginnings. Still and all, that is something. ~ Kristin Kladstrup

The next afternoon I left work to find that my car had been broken into and ransacked - but that not one thing had been stolen. I was so insulted that I left a note on the window that read:
Dear Scumbag Thieves,
If you go to the trouble of tossing my car, you could at least steal a lousy pair of sunglasses.
The next day I discovered a gift card lying on the driver's seat with this message:
Here's $500. It's the best we can do until the holidays.
P.S. Get some decent tires, why don't you. We couldn't sell these desperate maypops if we did steal them. ~ Molly Meadows

The trouble with this country is that there are too many people going about saying, "The trouble with this country is ... " ~ Sinclair Lewis

Don't trouble yourself with the woes of life, for they will only prevent you from giving all of yourself to others. A child needs his mother's love, not her tears. ~ Dannika Dark