Chris Gethard Quotes

...beautiful things often happen, and that the most beautiful things are often simple.

I think there is a weird loneliness that comes with being a comedian. There is something definitely inside the personality of a person who wants to be a comedian, and (he or she) is looking to connect (to the audience) at all times.

People ask, why hasn't that person busted out? Almost always, at the end of it, consciously or subconsciously, it hasn't happened because that person has chosen for it to not happen. Either walking away, because it wasn't the life they wanted, or through self-sabotaging.

My therapist and I even have a joke about it: shit is truly fucked up when I start threatening to take a road trip.

I'm not good at math. Numbers are a terrifying thing to me. My father is a whiz with money and the stock market, and he tries to explain it to me, and I find it terrifying.

I was that kid who did every activity when I was in high school. There wasn't a day that I didn't stay after school to do something. I just had my hands in everything. And I was similarly very, very angry. I was an angry little guy.

There are many hundreds of millions of people who have jobs harder than (mine), and I also remind myself of that every day. No matter how frustrating this can be, I am very lucky that I have been able to cobble together a little life, in which (comedy) is what I do. I am certainly not in danger of getting stuck in a mine anytime soon.

Growing up and being a kid, I knew that creativity was at the heart of what I wanted to do. I always had this feeling of wanting to be a comedian and wanting to be an actor.

The thing that I like about public-access is that I am often in the middle of chaos

People who get lucky, also tend to be really great looking, which is luck on some level, but it is also just the fact of the matter.

It's very interesting being an artist and a comedian, (because) you aim for jobs that will feed your ego, but when you get up to the precipice of them, you actually have to deliver. You actually have to understand that you're reaching a new level where there are way more eyes on you, way more expectations and way more pressure.

When you try to go back and watch improv on tape, it almost never feels as good as it did when a crowd was laughing at it.

As luck would have it, I happened to have a top hat that I previously wore to my junior prom.

You see people - maybe in a frustrating fashion - that don't get embraced, when they should. You get some people who get embraced too early, and they tend to flame out, but it's really rare that someone gets lucky. It's usually a combination of a lot of talent and a lot of hard work.

Mania is fun. I won't lie, it's fun. But it's usually followed by a soul-crushing depression.

You need an immense amount of luck and perseverance to even be on the playing field for success on a grand scale.

Outside of performing, (a comedian) is someone who is analyzing life, thinking about it and trying to be observing so much. In my opinion, it can make you feel on the outside looking in.

If people tell me something is impossible, I just want to prove that. I want to know that that's for certain. I don't want to not do something because someone says I can't.

The world of entertainment is built for big money. It's not built for small-scale projects that sustain themselves.

I get very jealous of my friends who have traditional families and 9-to-5 jobs, because I feel like just by the nature of being a comedian ...

The Internet seems like a safe house for the opposite mentality, for cynics and for jerks and for people who want to lash out. And it's a valid thing. It's a valid forum and I'm not going say that they aren't valid feelings. But it's sad. Considering the potential that something like the Internet, that connects so many people, has for good. I think it's sad that it's used so often for nothing but unfounded, overzealous negativity ...

The best advice I've gotten in terms of that was someone who said, "People will surprise you if you let them."

I'm unable to tell you what it feels like to be "a little" mad. My emotions work as if controlled by a light switch. I'm either fine or I'm out of control. I once spilled a container of thumbtacks and got as angry at myself as I did when I screwed up my relationship with my high school sweetheart. If I'm under the impression that there are Golden Grahams in my cupboard, then realize that there in fact are none, there's a high probability I'll be as sad as I was at my grandfather's funeral.

In other words, my reactions aren't in proportion to the things I'm reacting to. It's something I've been working on with a very lovely shrink for the past few years.

But against the 4Skins one day, all that hard word went out the window.

If you are a New York comedian who knows how to improvise and has glasses, you're going to start getting commercials.

If I could have enough money that I know I could buy a house someday, and if I want to have kids, I could raise them - I don't need the money grab. I don't need to have a mansion. I just need to be creative and happy.