Sexual Abuse Survivor Quotes

Though, the type of abuse differs from each individual, all survivors of child abuse deal with a certain extent of trauma, consciously or unconsciously. ~ Patricia Dsouza

The child turns up still trusting these lies to be the truth. ~ Patricia Dsouza

Society must stop the silence and raise their voice to child sexual abuse. ~ Patricia Dsouza

Abused children realize that they cannot rely on their emotions since their innocent love and trust are already crushed and betrayed. They learn that whatever the opinion they do express may be ignored or mocked. ~ Patricia Dsouza

Do not become an accomplice by being silent, voice up! ~ Patricia Dsouza

My abuse will always be part of my memoirs, my past, my history, but will no longer be a front-page in my lifespan ~ Patricia Dsouza

Whole night hanged with panic Sparking tears in those big wide eyes. ~ Patricia Dsouza

I believe we all heal differently, it is a process, and many like me are here to help you as you heal, as you recover. ~ Patricia Dsouza

Give yourself mourning time and comprehend that expressing grief can modify your emotional and physical well being ~ Patricia Dsouza

When people ask me about what made the biggest difference in my healing, I tell them that I was believed and tremendously loved. I never felt blamed or shamed into silence. ~ Aishah Shahidah Simmons

Healing isn't just about pain. It's about learning to love yourself. As you move from feeling like a victim to being a proud survivor, you will have glimmers of hope, pride and satisfaction. Those are natural by-products of healing. ~ Ellen Bass

Each person recovers at their own pace. Healing does not occur with a formula ~ Patricia Dsouza

The sole reason I stand to open it up now is that lots of people who are in pain just like I was, and when they see that there is still hope, they will discover that it is possible to come out of their prison. ~ Patricia Dsouza

I have to find a place to hide
An island in the sea
Surrounded by a racing tide
Where I can live with me ~ Laurie Matthew

No one can carry that pain out from you nor can anyone heal for you. ~ Patricia Dsouza

Whatever your age, you are the right age to be coming out and telling your truth. Find someone to tell- and tell, tell, tell, until your lungs ache. Tell until you can't tell anymore. It won't take away what happened to you, but it will re-map your life and take away the power from the abuse and the abuser. You are strong and resilient. You are not alone. ~ Patti Feuereisen

Neglect transpires when the accountable adult fails to provide sufficiently for the needs of a child. It may be deliberate and conscious cruelty, or it may be an incapability or unwillingness to care for and nurture a child. ~ Patricia Dsouza

We require to get out of our own built up Cocoons, these need to be worn, softened and freed through. ~ Patricia Dsouza

You possess the right to celebrate your victory, your healing, your recovery. ~ Patricia Dsouza

I am not damaged goods, I am not a product of my past. I am whole! ~ Patricia Dsouza

I can't change the past abuse, but I can change the impact it has on me today! ~ Patricia Dsouza

The experience of childhood sexual abuse leaves some survivors with a high tolerance for pain. Dysfunctional environments require endurance and thick skin. Child survivors sometimes have to commit to sticking things out in order to survive. This pattern of tolerance follows you into adulthood. Instead of using pain as a signal to evaluate and change direction, you may use pain as a signal to try harder. Try harder to please someone. Try harder to control your children. Try harder to be a good friend. Try harder to be successful at a job that you hate. You remain in survival mode that you picked up as a child. Your high tolerance for pain keeps you committed to dysfunctional experiences and relationships that recycle pain from the past. Sometimes, the only way out of this cycle is time in isolation to learn what peace feels like. Sometimes you have to be willing to let go of everything in order to learn how to hold onto anything. ~ Rosenna Bakari

A lot of attention has been given over to the Catholic Churches sexual abuse of children in their care, but this attention seems to have been hijacked by the media and has overshadowed the many thousands of victims that endured physical abuse. ~ Stephen Richards

Childhood abuse is the misuse of power and control which leads to wrong. ~ Patricia Dsouza

Life is really unpredictable. No matter what you serve or how hard you try you still cannot predict the future. ~ Patricia Dsouza

You can do it because this time you will do it for yourself, for your inner existence. For that child who was not able to stand up, because no hand of rescue came on. ~ Patricia Dsouza

I had victory and knew I was going to be fine, no matter what was adding up in my direction. This forever kind of freedom is amazing. ~ Patricia Dsouza

When they begin to feel that others don't love them, they already consider their worth and consider that they are not worth living at all. ~ Patricia Dsouza

Your own story matters. It's either a victor's journey or a victim's lament. The decision is in your hands.
Exceptional ~ Patricia Dsouza

If the abuse has taken place for a really long period of time, it becomes more and tougher and challenging as well. ~ Patricia Dsouza

One area where this misperception has hit hard has been research on child sexual abuse. Despite an explosion of research on the issue over recent decades, most research reported in the literature is focused on girls. There is significantly less attention given to boys, and, in fact, prior to 1980 it is difficult to find any research involving males who have been sexually abused. ~ Jan L. Frayne

I was becoming a product of society, a hardened juvenile! Now I was becoming rebellious and hateful. ~ Stephen Richards

Most of our informants [incest survivors] remembered their mothers as weak and powerless, finding their only dignity in martyrdom. ~ Judith Lewis Herman

I was worthy of healing my scars and so are you. ~ Patricia Dsouza

It wasn't some mysterious adverse personality trait that comprises of who I am, it unquestionably had a source - A cradle of years of unprocessed trauma owing to sexual, emotional, mental, verbal and physical ill-treatment. ~ Patricia Dsouza

Do not let your voice disappear! Protect our children from the predators of our society. ~ Patricia Dsouza

As survivors, we've been conditioned to be victims sexually. Many of us have never learned to say no or to set limits on our sexual activities ... To heal, it's important that we take control, that we make active choices concerning if, when, and how we want to explore sexuality. Especially in the beginning, you need to put your own needs about sex ahead of anyone else's. ~ Ellen Bass

You hold the ability to build it or ruin it. It's entirely up to you. It's definitely possible. ~ Patricia Dsouza

You pulled through it, you are not just a survivor, but a Victor. ~ Patricia Dsouza

When I felt as though I had reached land, it was like I was on a deserted sandy beach, feeling isolated and afraid to share with anyone the memories that haunted me. ~ Erin Merryn

Mia bottled all this up inside of her and just couldn't manage it any longer. Mia would feel like it was entirely her fault, what he did stay with her always. ~ Patricia Dsouza

Are you attentive when your inner self-speaks to you? ~ Patricia Dsouza

Many survivors have such profound deficiencies in self-protection that they can barely imagine themselves in a position of agency or choice. The idea of saying no to the emotional demands of a parent, spouse, lover or authority figure may be practically inconceivable. Thus, it is not uncommon to find adult survivors who continue to minister to the needs of those who once abused them and who continue to permit major intrusions without boundaries or limits. Adult survivors may nurse their abusers in illness, defend them in adversity, and even, in extreme cases, continue to submit to their sexual demands. ~ Judith Lewis Herman

A victorious person knows to own his failure, he is aware how to bring out good, even in the worst form of failures. ~ Patricia Dsouza

Add to your self-esteem by coming out in the open and speaking about what you went though. ~ Patricia Dsouza

Just as much as the media portray child sexual exploitation as being a 'hidden' crime, then that is no less of a case with child physical abuse. ~ Stephen Richards

From spending ten years in hell and coming to this regime of kindness was a shock. It was so much of a shock, it was unbelievable. I was like an untamed animal, I couldn't accept it and I just wouldn't accept it. ~ Stephen Richards

You may never be able to keep up with someone else's steps, either you may end up being far behind or far gone. Pick your path, not someone else's ~ Patricia Dsouza

You may not succeed at first or not always, but you will definitely find ways that don't contribute towards your journey and you will know not to take that road the next time. ~ Patricia Dsouza

You might think the Bangkok Hilton (the nickname of a fictional prison in Bangkok) was tough, well that was paradise compared to this place! ~ Stephen Richards

Stay strong and stand firm in your resistance. ~ Patricia Dsouza

I value and honor the way that my suffering brings me to further search and surrender. ~ Maureen Brady

Why me" goes along to haunt many survivors even today. Why was I abused? Or Why was I not protected? ~ Patricia Dsouza

I shoot the man who told me my womanism is of the devil
As if he knew the demons that trouble me
These demons that trouble me
Have no trouble shooting you
They shoot you
They will not pray
For God's forgiveness
I always knew
I had a little bit of heathen in me.
Always knew
I had a lot of woman in me.
We shoot you ~ Hannah V. Sawyerr

You are a survivor, at times you may not yet experience it, but the fact is that the worst and the cruelest part of your life is over. ~ Patricia Dsouza

I can just conceive of the pit of despair, the notion of being powerless and the essence of existence through it entirely ~ Patricia Dsouza

The worst part ever is discoursing about the abuse to anyone you trust in the family or friends and when they prefer not to believe in you, that feeling of being deserted by people you trusted and spoke to is even more painful than the whole trauma of the abuse and insult. ~ Patricia Dsouza

I am free because I fought for freedom, I am a Survivor. ~ Patricia Dsouza

Being survivors signifies that we have recognized that we have been through a lot that should never have taken place and we now hope to let our wounds heal and recuperate. ~ Patricia Dsouza

That is when I knew that my past can never change, but my correlation with it can definitely change. ~ Patricia Dsouza

Discover how to convey in a right way. ~ Patricia Dsouza

There is an intensified risk for a child living in a household experiencing domestic violence, because their basic childhood requirement is not being met, in addition to the demand for care and protection by their parents. ~ Patricia Dsouza

when these little ones don't receive the love, they need in their homes, they seek attention outside. ~ Patricia Dsouza

Are you capable to truly distinguish the person you envision in the mirror? ~ Patricia Dsouza

Parents that provide a nonviolent, fostering, strong and steady background for their children assist in impede violence and abuse in their households. ~ Patricia Dsouza

I experience what it is to exist in perpetual fear, afraid, totally controlled, manipulated, ashamed at all times and many more things one can't still think to talk around. ~ Patricia Dsouza

I alone can heal myself, I alone am responsible for it, I alone have the authority and control over my healing, I am answerable to my healing and I alone can do it. ~ Patricia Dsouza

Abuse ambushed my life, I could not love myself truly and could never have a healthy relationship, they were either abused or completely impaired. ~ Patricia Dsouza

I recall as a child when I got so hostile that I didn't know whom to trust anymore, and then I would still act as if everything was alright. I would put that brilliant smile; which people love about me still right away. I am told to have the very beautiful smile, that smile became my signature throughout my life. ~ Patricia Dsouza

Healing has its own process, it's a development that considers its own form. ~ Patricia Dsouza

Survivors who choose to heal are extraordinary people. ~ Patricia Dsouza

I knew I did not deserve help, because this was not real trauma. He was a kid, not a criminal. Accomplished, not dangerous. He was the one who lost everything. I was just the nobody it happened to. ~ Chanel Miller

Children are naive, they don't possess enough skills to be able to recognize the balance between the truth and a lie. ~ Patricia Dsouza

Sexual abusers often convince their victims that the abuse was their own demerit. ~ Patricia Dsouza

It took a strong you to live through the abuse and the secrets. ~ Patricia Dsouza

When we first begin to take power more directly, after long having kept our relationship to it underground...it is natural that we experience anxiety, even guilt, at putting ourselves first. These feeling let us know we are taking action; they do not need to stop us. ~ Maureen Brady

Incest is almost always a devastating experience for
the victim. ~ Susan Forward

An abused child never feels safe, growing up. The wrong that this child has gone through can never be seen or easily imagined by those who have never been abused. ~ Patricia Dsouza

As these abuse children grow, they oppose the lies (that they still trust and believe to be true) to the verity that they pick up and they get all thrown when they conflict and friction. ~ Patricia Dsouza

With regards pedophilia I have always looked on it as that ... pedophilia. I thought that one religion is no different to the other and I am now truthfully beginning to think that. ~ Stephen Richards

Abused children as they grow to believe that they are damaged beyond repair. ~ Patricia Dsouza

Coming to terms with incest is not easy. Learning to be a survivor, not a victim, gives new meaning to life ~ Lynette Gould

All abuse is damaging and harmful, even if it took place once or infinite times. ~ Patricia Dsouza

Manipulation is majorly at play in sexual abuse. The kid is in full control, influenced, used completely for one's advantage, to work to the utmost. ~ Patricia Dsouza

From a young boy's viewpoint this could not get any worse, especially when you were told that you belonged to the devil, and this bullying of me went on for a long time. ~ Stephen Richards

I dived out of the office and I was gone ... hitting these fields like a mad March hare. This wasn't Born Free, it was RUN FREE! ~ Stephen Richards

Still, it's never about staying a prisoner in your childhood, it's about your childhood occurrences, incidents and episodes staying fastened and chained inside of you. ~ Patricia Dsouza

The most treasured gift you can present yourself today is a hand of assistance to liberate you from the prison of anxiety, fear, & stress so that you can set free. ~ Patricia Dsouza

Do not have anger control you nor consume you. Express it and take responsibility for it. ~ Patricia Dsouza

You don't need to continue being a victim forever! ~ Patricia Dsouza

The abuser wants the victim to be confounded. They do not require the victim to see undoubtedly nor see things for what they are. ~ Patricia Dsouza

I can identify with their shame and ache because I share a past of childhood abuse. In this, I am convinced: if I can do this, you definitely can too. ~ Patricia Dsouza

Welcome to my world of dreams Where I live by the rivers and streams As tranquillity flows by And no fear is seen in the eye This is the most peaceful place to be Where you will fall in love with the word "ME" As you learn the art of being free ~ Patricia Dsouza

My personal impression is that - Forgiveness is essential for recovery, it loses the power the abuser has over the survivor and allows them to heal. ~ Patricia Dsouza

Through my willpower and strength, I can make a difference to the world because I am a Survivor. ~ Patricia Dsouza

Let's take away your emphasis from the awkward task of altering your past and move towards focusing more on the achievable purpose of changing our TODAY, TOMORROW and BEYOND! ~ Patricia Dsouza

Shame plays a huge part in why you hate who you are. ~ Angel Ploetner

I am disgusted that I was often taken into their bed and told to do things to both of them. The things a decent parent wouldn't think of. I didn't know that having sex with her or with him was wrong because I'd never known anything else but I never understood why it used to hurt so much. It carried on right until she died and I am sure that if she was still alive it would still be going on now. I wished someone would help me and stop them hurting me. I tried to do what they told me to do because somethings they were nice to me if I did it properly."

- Graham talks about being sexually abused by his mother (and her boyfriend)

Graham was sexually abused by his mother. The only person who showed him any affection in his childhood was his grandmother.

"My mother always told me the police would think I was a 'dirty little bastard' if I told them and they would take me away to a children's home and I would never see grandmother again."

"I knew it was my fault and nobody would believe me."
- Graham

Children often do not tell about abuse because of their fears about how other people will respond. The most common fear is that they will not be believed, It is a child's word against an adult's and the adult may be well liked and respected in the community. Nowadays, because of the television and newspaper coverage, people are aware that child sexual abuse does happen. In the recent past it was thought to be a rare occurrence, ~ Carolyn Ainscough

She fought to relive and come alive ~ Patricia Dsouza

We are more than survivors, more than victors! ~ Patricia Dsouza