Laurie Halse Anderson Quotes

She laid land mines in my skill that detonated weeks later. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

There's no point in asking why, even though everybody will. I know why. The harder question is "why not?" I can't believe she ran out of answers before I did. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

It's a shame we can't just admit that we failed family living, sell the house, split up the money, and get on with our lives. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

Write about the emotions you fear the most. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

He doesn't see my breasts or my waist or my hips. He only sees the nightmare. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

It was like looking at a knot, knowing it was a knot, but not knowing how to untie it. I had no map for this life. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I am getting better at smiling when people expect it. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

Dr. Parker and all my parents live in a paper-mache world. They just patch up problems with strips of newspaper and a little glue. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

Because I am still a little girl who believes in Santa and the tooth fairy and you. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

Note: 'family' does NOT only mean a biological unit composed of people who share genetic markers or legal bonds, headed by a heterosexual-mated pair. Family is much, much more than that. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I open a paperclip and scratch it across the inside of my left wrist. Pitiful. If a suicide attempt is a cry for help, then what is this. A whimper, a peep? I draw little window cracks of blood, etching line after line until it stops hurting. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

the false innocence
you render for them
by censoring truth
protects only you ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

The same boys who got detention in elementary school for beating the crap out of people are now rewarded for it. They call it football. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I can't tell anymore when I'm asleep and when I'm awake, or which is worse. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

None of [the books are] worth reading. There are no fairy tales, no faerie tails, no sword-swinging princesses or lightning-throwing gods. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I am almost a real girl the entire drive home. I went to a diner. I drank hot chocolate and ate french fries. Talked to a guy for a while. Laughed a couple of times. A little like ice-skating for the first time, wobbly, but I did it. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

Fracture lines etch the surface of the glass box as if a body fell from the sky and landed on it. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

Who wants to recover? It took me years to get that tiny. I wasn't sick; I was strong. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

Everyone is born a freak," notes Hayley. "Every newborn baby, wet and hungry and screaming, is a fresh-hatched freak who wants to have a good time and make the world a better place ... Most teenagers wind up in high school. And high school is where the zombification process becomes deadly. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

And that's the problem. When you're
alive, people can hurt you. It's easier to crawl into a bone
cage or a snowdrift of confusion. It's easier to lock everybody
out.
But it's a lie. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I don't say anything and I feel awful. I tell somebody and I feel worse. I'm having trouble finding a middle ground. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I think maybe I might have to do what some other authors do, which is do a variation on my name, just to send readers the message that, 'Yep, this is me, but this is a different part of me. So brace yourself.' ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

The warped perception of time is a hallmark of trauma. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I failed eating, failed drinking, failed not cutting myself into shreds. Failed friendship. Failed sisterhood and daughterhood. Failed mirrors and scales and phone calls. Good thing I'm stable. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

Welcome to the only class that will teach you to how to survive
Welcome to Art. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

Why not draw naked guys, just to be fair? Naked women is art, naked guys a no-no, I bet. Probably because most painters are men. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

be aggressive, BE-BE Aggressive! B-E
A-G-G-R-E-S-S-I-V-E ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

Maybe that was why I wanted to slap so many of the zombies; they had no idea how freaking lucky they were. Lucky and ignorant, happy little rich kids who believed in Santa Claus and the tooth fairy and thought that life was supposed to be fair. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

Each reader has to find her or his own message within a book. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I had let down my shields, that was the problem. The crazy inside Dad had infected me, weakened me so that when Finn smiled, I'd been vulnerable. I'd dropped my shields and let myself pretend that somebody like Finn would want to be with somebody like me. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

We swore sacred oaths to be strong and to save the planet and to be friends forever. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I have gotten one question repeatedly from young men. These are guys who liked the book, but they are honestly confused. They ask me why Melinda was so upset about being raped. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

Rumors are spread by jealous people ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

This is not a resting bitch face This is a touch-me-and-die face ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

Nicole can do anything that involves a ball and whistle. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

That fellow was like all of us: descended from good people who were stolen from their families and country, sailed over the sea, and forced into slavery. 'We don't let them steal our dignity,' that preacher said. Richard, his name was. He said they cannot steal our honor, our strength, or our love." "True words," I said. "Do you know what he said about this America?" Henry asked. I shook my head. "Remember, lads?" Henry asked his mates. "Join with me. He said, 'This land . . .'" A half dozen voices spoke with Henry, strong black men sharing the preacher's words like a hymn or a prayer. "'Which we have watered with our tears and our blood, is now our mother country.'" The words drifted up to the stars with the sparks from the fire. "We go to war, Missus Isabel," Henry added, "in order to make our mother country, this land, free for everyone. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I am locked into the mirror and there is no door out. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

IT happened. There is no avoiding it, no forgetting. No running away, or flying, or burying, or hiding. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I wasn't going to let her sucker me into being her friend again just so she could turn around and crush me one more time. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

Love messes you up and makes you do strange things. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I watch some kids ask the cafeteria ladies to sign their books. What do they write: "Hope your chicken patties never bleed?" Or, maybe, "May your Jell-O always wiggle? ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

Adrenaline kicks you in when you're starving. That's what nobody understands. Except for being hungry and cold, most of the time I feel like I can do anything. It gives me superhuman powers of smell and hearing. I can see what people are thinking, stay two steps ahead of them. I do enough homework to stay off the radar. Every night I climb thousands of steps into the sky to make me so exhausted that when I fall into bed, I don't notice Cassie. Then suddenly it's morning and I leap on the hamster wheel and it starts all over again. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I reach for funny books all the time to help me get through life. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

Rape wounds deeply, splits open
your core with shrapnel.
The stench of the injury attracts maggots
which hatch into clouds of doubt and self-loathing
the dirt you feel inside you nourishes
anxiety, depression, and shame
poisoning your blood, festering
in your brain until you will do anything to stop
feeling the darkness rising within
anything
to stop feeling–

untreated pain
is a cancer of the soul
that can kill you ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I wonder how long it would take for anyone to notice if I just stopped talking. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

And then a new screen, one I had never seen before, never even heard of popped up. It gave me a choice. I could become the new Lord of Darkness myself, or I could take a gamble and be reincarnated. I chose wisely. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I was good at digging holes. It was the rest of life I sucked at. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I am not going to think about it. It was ugly, but it's over, and I'm not going to think about it. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

A breath of steam trickles out, filled with the sobs of a grown woman breaking into girl-sized pieces. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

Apologies mean nothing if you don't mean it. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I was in a race to see if I would die from the outside in or the inside out. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

A little kid asks my dad why that man is chopping down the tree.
Dad: He's not chopping it down. He's saving it. Those branches were long dead from disease. All plants are like that. By cutting off the damage you make it possible for the tree to grow again. You watch - by the end of summer, this tree will be the strongest on the block. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

Cold and silence. Nothing quieter than snow. The sky screams to deliver it, a hundred banshees flying on the edge of
the blizzard. But once the snow covers the ground, it hushes as still as my heart. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I needed to hear the world but didn't want the world to know I was listening. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I can't face the idea of riding home on a busful of sweaty, smiling teeth sucking up my oxygen. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I don't just use yarn from a store. I buy old sweaters from consignment shops. The older the better, and unravel them. There are countries of women in this scarf/shawl/blanket. Soon it will be big enough to keep me warm. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

It's always there - fear - and if you don't stay on top of it, you'll drown. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

One had to be careful with elbows and boys ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I am super proud of being an American, but we fail our veterans every day. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

He says a million things without saying a word. I have never heard a more eloquent
silence. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

This is not our fight', the old man said. 'British or American, that is not the choice. You must choose your own side, find your road through the valley of darkness that will lead you to the river Jordan ... Look hard for your river Jordan, my child. You'll find it. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

The winds of the desert have names. They feed on the bodies of broken children and rip out the beating hearts of men. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

Be careful what you wish for. There's always a catch. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

(Even the teachers noticed. Mr. Diaz walked past my locker when Finn was there and said, "For the love of all that is holy, you two, please don't breed.") Pg 149 ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I have ten bucks in my pocket - what to spend it on? French fries - ten dollars' worth of french fries, ultimate fantasy. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

Here stands a girl clutching a knife. There is grease on the stove, blood in the air, and angry words piled in the corners. We are trained not to see it, not to see any of it ... Someone just ripped off my eyelids. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

Why bother trying? What was the point? So I could go to some suck-ass college, get a diploma, march out into a job that I hated, marry a pretty girl who would want to divorce me, but then she wouldn't because we'd have kids, so instead she'd be the angry woman at the other end of the kitchen table, and the kids would grow up watching this, until one day I'd look at my son and he'd look just like that face in the bathroom mirror?
If that was life, then it was twisted. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

It doesn't hurt. Nothing hurts except the small smiles and blushes that flash across the room like tiny sparrows. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

His Excellency today appealed to the Officers of this Army to consider themselves as a band of brothers cemented by the justice of a common cause.
-General Orders of George Washington, Valley Forge ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

That can be the most painstaking aspect of being a teen, figuring out what the world really looks like. If you find someone in a book, you know you're not alone and that's what's so comforting about books. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I lift my arm out of the water. It's a log. Put it back under and it blows up even bigger. People see the log and call it a twig. They yell at me because I can't see what they see. Nobody can explain to me why my eyes work different than theirs. Nobody can make it stop. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

What did it feel like to die? Was it a peaceful sleep? Some thought it was full of either trumpet-blowing angels or angry devils. Perhaps I was already dead. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I understood what triggered her earthquakes, most of them. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I know my head isn't screwed on straight. I want to leave, transfer, warp myself to another galaxy. I want to confess everything, hand over the guilt and mistake and anger to someone else. There is a beast in my gut, I can hear it scraping away at the inside of my ribs. Even if I dump the memory, it will stay with me, staining me. My closest is a good thing, a quiet place that helps me hold these thoughts inside my head where no one can hear them. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I don't reread my books after they're published, because it's agony. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

Eating was hard. Breathing was hard. Living was hardest. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

The night sky stretched on forever above me, the stars flung like glass beads and pearls on a black velvet cloak. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I am so sorry. I wish you knew even one tenth of one percent of how sorry I am ... It was my fault. Can I kill myself here, or should I do it outside, so the mess on your carpet doesn't upset your mother? ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

Our culture has the expectation that the memories of a happy childhood will somehow ground you and prepare you for adult life. But what about the memories that cut, that wound, that won't heal? ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

Tell me this is a nightmare ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I have survived. I am here. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I dare you to punch me," I said.
"You? Dare me?" He was laughing too hard to say anything else.
I shove him. "I double-dare you. If you don't have the guts to do it, you're a weenie." I shove again, harder. "If you do, you're an even bigger weenie because it's harder to take a punch than to give one. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

The time has come to arm-wrestle some demons. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

There is a beast in my gut, I can hear it scraping away at the inside of my ribs. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

We have to acknowledge that adolescence is that time of transition where we begin to introduce to children that life isn't pretty, that there are difficult things, there are hard situations, it's not fair. Bad things happen to good people. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I'm not wearing this!" I shouted.
"Wear it or die," Mom shouted back. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

People who have to announce that they are trustworthy deserve to be lied to. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

Ghosts are waiting in the shadows of the room, patient dull shimmers. The others can see them, too, I know it. We're all afraid to talk about what stares at us from the dark. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

The tears dissolve the last block of ice in my throat. I feel the frozen stillness melt down through the inside of me, dripping shards of ice that vanish in a puddle of sunlight on the stained floor. Words float up

Me: "Let me tell you about it. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I'm the only one sitting alone, under the glowing neon sign which reads, Complete and Total Loser, Not Quite Sane. Stay Away. Do Not Feed. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

Mr. Freeman: You are getting better at this, but it's not good enough. This looks like a tree,but it is an average, ordinary, everyday, boring tree. Breathe life into it. Make it bend - trees are flexible, so they don't snap. Scar it, give it a twisted branch - perfect trees don't exist. Nothing is perfect. Flaws are interesting. Be the tree. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

Flames curled out of all the windows next door. The rooftop beyond that was a lake of fire. Every building in sight was burning. The air was filled with crackling and popping sounds, with shrieks and screams coming from the street below. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I want to be in fifth grade again. Now, that is a deep dark secret, almost as big as the other one. Fifth grade was easy
old enough to play outside without Mom, too young to go off the block. The perfect leash length. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

The one good thing about being kind of shy is that nobody bugs you when you want to be left alone. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

The smoke shifted direction and I breathed in. Breathed out. On the inhale I was angry. On the exhale ... there it was again. Fear. The fear made me angry and the anger made me afraid and I wasn't sure who he was anymore. Or who I was. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I think you have a lot to say. I'd like to hear it. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

Do I want to die from the inside out or the outside in? ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I'm just going to pretend that a very good-smelling, incredibly warm stranger is sitting next to me, a harmless stranger. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

You can't speak up for your right to be silent. That's letting the bad guys win. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson

I open up a paper clip and scratch it across the inside of my left wrist. Pitiful. If a suicide attempt is a cry for help, then what is this? A whimper, a peep? I draw little windowcracks of blood, etching line after line until it stops hurting. It looks like I arm-wrestled a rosebush. ~ Laurie Halse Anderson