Tenente Valdez Quotes

Huh," Leo said. "Well, if you ever get off this island and want a job, let me know. You're not a total klutz."
She smirked. "A job, eh?" Making things in your forge?"
"Nah, we could start our own shop," Leo said, surprising himself. Starting a machine shop had always been one of his dreams, but he'd never told anyone about it. "Leo and Calypso's Garage: Auto Repair and Mechanical Monsters. ~ Rick Riordan

As long as he had his tool belt, Leo Valdez wasn't going to sit around helplessly watching the Demigod Death Channel. ~ Rick Riordan

Be she alewife,
fishmonger, washerwoman, or whore; the woman who fucks my whole cock shall I take to church's
door. ~ Lisa Valdez

The future for Commander Tool Belt was not looking so hot. ~ Rick Riordan

I'm not sure how the ponies happened, though I have an inkling: "Can I get you anything?" I'll say, getting up from a dinner table, "Coffee, tea, a pony?" People rarely laugh at this, especially if they've heard it before. "This party's 'sposed to be fun," a friend will say. "Really? Will there be pony rides?" It's a nervous tic and a cheap joke, cheapened further by the frequency with which I use it. For that same reason, it's hard to weed it out of my speech – most of the time I don't even realize I'm saying it. There are little elements in a person's life, minor fibers that become unintentionally tangled with your personality. Sometimes it's a patent phrase, sometimes it's a perfume, sometimes it's a wristwatch. For me, it is the constant referencing of ponies.

I don't even like ponies. If I made one of my throwaway equine requests and someone produced an actual pony, Juan-Valdez-style, I would run very fast in the other direction. During a few summers at camp, I rode a chronically dehydrated pony named Brandy who would jolt down without notice to lick the grass outside the corral and I would careen forward, my helmet tipping to cover my eyes. I do, however, like ponies on the abstract. Who doesn't? It's like those movies with the animated insects. Sure, the baby cockroach seems cute with CGI eyelashes, but how would you feel about fifty of her real-life counterparts living in your oven? And that's precisely the manner in which the ponies clomped their way into ~ Sloane Crosley

We've arrived," Leo announced. "Time to Split."
Frank groaned. "Can we leave Valdez in Croatia? ~ Rick Riordan

Who's possessing who now, Casper? ~ Rick Riordan

Dang! Snake people know how to make bundt cake. ~ Rick Riordan

Percy and Hedge lay on the deck, looking exhausted. Hedge was missing his shoes. He grinned at the sky, muttering, "Awesome. Awesome." Percy was covered in nicks and scratches, like he'd jumped through a window. He didn't say anything but he grasped Annabeth's hand weakly as if to say, Be right with you as soon as the world stops spinning.
Leo, Piper, and Jason, who'd been eating in the mess hall, came rushing up the stairs.
"What? What?" Leo cried, holding a half-eaten grilled cheese sandwich. "Can't a guy even take a lunch break? What's wrong?"
"Followed!" Frank yelled again.
"Followed by what? Jason asked.
"I don't know!" Frank panted. "Whales? Sea monsters? Maybe Kate and Porky!"
Annabeth wanted to strangle the guy, but she wasn't sure her hands would fit around his thick neck. "That makes absolutely no sense. ~ Rick Riordan

A tinkerer," snapped Pasiphaë. "Even worse. I knew Daedalus. His inventions brought me nothing but trouble."

Leo blinked. "Daedalus…like, the Daedalus? Well, then, you should know all about us tinkerers. We're more into fixing, building, occasionally sticking wads of oilcloth in the mouths of rude ladies - ~ Rick Riordan

Is it true cats wont stay in a house when it's haunted? ~ Jeff Valdez

Piper patted his shoulder. Trust me, Valdez. Beautiful people never lie. ~ Rick Riordan

We've all got weaknesses. Me, for instance. I'm tragically funny and good-looking. ~ Rick Riordan

Also ... the plan sounded exactly like the sneaky, twisted, ridiculously annoying and noble sort of thing Leo Valdez would do. ~ Rick Riordan

Leo Valdez deserved a special punishment," she [Khione] said. "I have sent him to a place from which he can never return. ~ Rick Riordan

I figure the universe is basically like a machine. I don't know who made it, if it was the Fates, or the gods, or capital-G God, or whatever. But it chugs along the way it's supposed to most of the time. Sure, little pieces break and stuff goes haywire once in a while, but mostly ... things happen for a reason. ~ Rick Riordan

I try not to think. It interferes with being nuts - Leo Valdez ~ Rick Riordan

Why would you come to Italy to see Spanish steps? That's like going to China for Mexican food, isn't it? ~ Rick Riordan

Never mind," Leo said. "I'm pretty sure pi is, uh, 3.1415 blah blah blah. The number goes on forever, but the sphere has only five rings, so that should be enough, if I'm right."
"And if you're not?" Frank asked.
"Well, then, Leo fall down, go boom. Let's find out! ~ Rick Riordan

Hey." [Leo] squeezed her hand, though Hazel sensed nothing romantic in the gesture. "Machines are designed to work."
"Uh, what?"
"I figure the universe is basically like a machine. I don't know who made it, if it was the Fates, or the gods, or capital-G God, or whatever. But it chugs along the way it's supposed to most of the time. Sure, little pieces break and stuff goes haywire once in a while, but mostly ... things happen for a reason. Like you and me meeting."
"Leo Valdez," Hazel marveled, "you're a philosopher. ~ Rick Riordan

It'll be dangerous," Nyssa warned him. "Hardship, monsters, terrible suffering. Possibly none of you will come back alive."
"Oh." Suddenly Leo didn't look so excited. Then he remembered everyone was watching. "I mean ... Oh, cool! Suffering? I love suffering! Let's do this. ~ Rick Riordan

Sweet allowed her pregnancy to get the better of her and simply sat down. Reenie's lips set into a straight, emotionless line. Mawu no longer talked back, the words she did speak taking on an air of vapidity. Philip was chained at night, no longer trusted. So it was no wonder that Lizzie sought out the white woman then. ~ Dolen Perkins-Valdez

The Exxon Valdez spill triggered a swift and strong response that changed policies about shipping, about double-hulled construction. A number of laws came into place. ~ Sylvia Earle

As his raft skimmed over the water, taking him back to the mortal world, he understood a line from the Prophecy better-an oath to keep with a final breath.
He understood how dangerous oaths could be. But Leo didn't care.
"I'm coming back for you, Calypso," he said to the night wind. "I swear it on the River Styx. ~ Rick Riordan

You're that lady," Leo said. "The one who was named after Caribbean music."
Her eyes glinted murderously. "Caribbean music."
"Yeah. Reggae?" Leo shook his head. "Merengue? Hold on, I'll get it."
He snapped his fingers. "Calypso! ~ Rick Riordan

Correct." Kekrops sounded bitter, like he regretted his decision. "My people were the original Athenians
the gemini."
"Like your zodiac sign?" Percy asked. "I'm a Leo."
"No, stupid. "I'm a Leo. You're a Percy. ~ Rick Riordan

Valdez," said Coach Hedge with surprising gentleness. "Let me take the wheel. You've been steering for two hours."
"Two hours?"
"Yeah. Give me the wheel."
"Coach?"
"Yeah, kid?"
"I can't unclench my hands. ~ Rick Riordan

Why would Gaia be back at camp?' Leo asked. 'Percy's nosebleed was here.'

'Dude,' Percy said, 'first off, you heard Athena – don't blame my nose. Second, Gaia's the earth. She can pop up anywhere she wants. Besides, she told us she was going to do this. She said the first thing on her to-do list was destroying our camp. Question is: how do we stop her? ~ Rick Riordan

Patience
"It's just that you needn't have gone to all the trouble." Matthew
"Trouble? What trouble is that, Patience?" His eyes dropped to her mouth. "Don't you see? You're no trouble to me." He lifted his gaze back to hers. "And even if you were, I would go to the ends of the earth to be troubled by you. ~ Lisa Valdez

Laughter is a good way to hide pain"- Leo Valdez ~ Rick Riordan

No!" Leo yelled.
"Uhhh," Nico groaned from the floor.
"Piper!" Jason cried.
"Monkey!" Frank yelled.
"Not monkeys," Hazel grumbled. "I think those are dwarfs."
"Stealing my stuff!" Leo yelled, and ran for the stairs. ~ Rick Riordan

My Sleeping Beauty ~ I kissed you, but you did not wake. I find this strange for I know I am your prince. ~ Lisa Valdez