Newt Scamander Quotes

INT. MINISTÈRE DES AFFAIRES MAGIQUES, RECORDS ROOM ATRIUM - NIGHT
MELUSINE: Puis-je vous aider?
NEWT: Er - yes, this is Leta Lestrange. And - I'm her -
TINA: Fiancé.
There is an increased awkwardness between them.
NEWT: Tina, about that fiancée business -
TINA (brittle): Sorry, yeah. I should have congratulated you -
The doors to the records office open. They enter briskly.

INT. MINISTÈRE DES AFFAIRES MAGIQUES, RECORDS ROOM - NIGHT
The doors close behind them, plunging them into darkness.
NEWT: No, that's -
TINA: Lumos.
NEWT: Tina - about Leta -
TINA: Yes, I've just said, I am happy for you -
NEWT: Yeah, well, don't.
She stops. Looks at him. What?
NEWT: Please don't be happy.
(in trouble) Uh, no, no. I'm sorry. I don't . . . Uh, obviously, I - Obviously I want you to be. And I hear that you are now. Uh, which is wonderful. Sorry -
(a gesture of hopelessness) What I'm trying to say is, I want you to be happy, but don't be happy that I'm happy, because I'm not.
(off her confusion) Happy.
(off her continued confusion) Or engaged.
TINA: What?
NEWT: It was a mistake in a stupid magazine. My brother's marrying Leta, June the sixth. I'm supposed to be best man. Which is sort of mildly hilarious.
TINA: Does he think you're here to win her back?
(beat)
Are you here to win her back?
NEWT: No! I'm here to -
A beat. He stares at her.
NE ~ J.K. Rowling

DUMBLEDORE: Do you know why I admire you, Newt? More, perhaps, than any man I know? (off NEWT'S surprise) You don't seek power or popularity. You simply ask, is the thing right in itself? If it is, then I must do it, no matter the cost. ~ J.K. Rowling

See, they're currently in alien terrain, surrounded by millions of the most vicious creatures on the planet. Humans. - Newt Scamander ~ J.K. Rowling

NEWT rummages in his pockets and pulls out a tiny bottle with only a couple of muddy drops left inside it.
TINA: Is that Polyjuice?
NEWT (of the bottle): Just enough to get me inside.
He looks down at his coat and finds one of THESEUS'S hairs on his shoulder. He adds it to the mixture, drinks, and turns into THESEUS, still wearing NEWT'S clothes.
TINA: Who - ?
NEWT: My brother, Theseus. He's an Auror. And a hugger. ~ J.K. Rowling

INT. KAMA'S HIDEOUT - EVENING
The interior of KAMA'S hideout is pitch black. The sound of water dripping. A brief shaft of sunlight reveals TINA, sleeping lightly on the floor in her coat.
NEWT: Tina?
She wakes. A moment as NEWT and TINA stare at each other. Each has thought of the other daily for a year. With no sign of KAMA, it seems she has been rescued.
TINA (joyful, disbelieving): Newt!
TINA notices KAMA entering in the background and raising his wand. Her expression changes.
KAMA: Expelliarmus!
NEWT'S wand flies out of his hand into KAMA'S. Bars form across the door, imprisoning them.
KAMA (through the door): My apologies, Mr. Scamander! I shall return and release you when Credence is dead!
TINA: Kama, wait!
KAMA: You see, either he dies . . . or I do.
He claps a hand to his eye.
KAMA: No, no, no, no. Oh no. No, no, no.
He jerks convulsively and slides to the floor, unconscious.
NEWT: Well, that's not the best start to a rescue attempt.
TINA: This was a rescue attempt? You've just lost me my only lead.
JACOB launches for the door, trying to break it down.
NEWT (innocent): Well, how was the interrogation going before we turned up?
TINA throws him a dark look. She strides to the back of the cave.
Pickett, who, unnoticed, has hopped out of NEWT'S pocket, successfully picks the lock, and the bars swing open.
JACOB: Newt!
NEWT: Well done, Pick.
(to TINA) You need thi ~ J.K. Rowling

INT. NEWT'S HOUSE - NIGHT
NEWT opens the front door cautiously. Inside, a baby Niffler is swinging from the brass cord of a table lamp, causing the light to flicker on and off. The baby Niffler succeeds in stealing the brass cord before spotting NEWT. It scampers away, knocking all manner of objects to the floor.
NEWT spots a second baby Niffler sitting on a set of weighing scales, pinned down by gold-colored weights it is clearly attempting to steal.
As the first baby makes it to the dining table, NEWT lightly drops a saucepan on top of it, which continues moving across the table. NEWT tosses an apple into the opposite weighing scale, sending the baby Niffler flying into the air. NEWT catches both baby Nifflers as they fall, then tucks them into his pockets.
Satisfied, NEWT heads toward the door to his basement but turns at the last moment to see a third escaped baby Niffler climbing onto a bottle of champagne on the counter. With a sense of inevitability, the champagne bottle pops and the baby Niffler zooms toward NEWT on top of the cork, soaring past him and down the stairs to the basement. ~ J.K. Rowling

EXT. LONDON BACK STREET - EVENING
NEWT apparates and walks on briskly beneath an increasingly stormy sky. Seconds later, STEBBINS, an Auror, Apparates some yards behind him. They have been playing this game for an hour. NEWT turns a corner into a darker alleyway, peers back around the corner, and points his wand back at STEBBINS.
NEWT (sotto voce): Ventus.
STEBBINS is immediately caught in a hurricane for one. To the confusion and amusement of passing Muggles, his hat flies away, he is almost knocked off his feet, and cannot proceed.
Smiling slightly, NEWT withdraws his head. ~ J.K. Rowling

NEWT shuffles over awkwardly to the bereft THESEUS. NEWT hesitates, struggling to find words of comfort. Then for the first time in his life, he puts his arms around his brother. They hug.

NEWT: I've chosen my side. ~ J.K. Rowling

INT. DEFENSE AGAINST THE DARK ARTS CLASS - FOURTEEN YEARS PREVIOUSLY - DAY
It is Boggart time. DUMBLEDORE supervises the line of teenagers advancing to try their luck. "Riddikulus" - "Riddikulus" - gusts of hilarity as a shark becomes a flotation device, a zombie's head turns into a pumpkin, a vampire turns into a buck-toothed rabbit.
DUMBLEDORE: All right, Newt. Be brave.
16-YEAR-OLD NEWT moves to the front of the queue. The Boggart turns into a Ministry desk.
DUMBLEDORE: Mmm, that's an unusual one. So Mr. Scamander fears what more than anything else in the world?
16-YEAR-OLD NEWT: Having to work in an office, sir.
The class roars with laughter.
DUMBLEDORE: Go ahead, Newt.
16-YEAR-OLD NEWT: Riddikulus!
NEWT turns the desk into a gamboling wooden dragon and moves aside.
DUMBLEDORE: Well done. Good job. ~ J.K. Rowling

DUMBLEDORE conjures NICOLAS FLAMEL'S card from thin air and offers it to NEWT, who eyes it with suspicion.
NEWT: What's that?
DUMBLEDORE: It's an address of a very old acquaintance of mine. A safe house in Paris, reinforced with enchantments.
NEWT: Safe house? Why would I need a safe house in Paris?
DUMBLEDORE: One hopes you won't, but should things at some point go terribly wrong, it's good to have a place to go. You know, for a cup of tea.
NEWT: No, no, no - absolutely not. ~ J.K. Rowling

TINA: I'll have to go to the Ministry with what I've got.
(a wobble in her voice) It was nice to see you again, Mr. Scamander.
She strides from the room, leaving NEWT perplexed and upset.

INT. FLAMEL HOUSE, HALLWAY - AFTERNOON
JACOB follows TINA into the hall.
JACOB: Hey, hold on one second, will you? Well, hold on! Wait! Tina!
She leaves. As the front door closes, NEWT appears at the drawing room door.
JACOB: (to NEWT)
You didn't mention salamanders, did you?
NEWT: No, she just - ran. I don't know . . .
JACOB (firm): So you chase after her!
NEWT grabs his case. He leaves.

EXT. RUE DE MONTMORENCY - END OF DAY
TINA is hurrying up the road. NEWT hastens to catch up.
NEWT: Tina. Please, just listen to me -
TINA: Mr. Scamander, I need to go talk to the Ministry - and I know how you feel about Aurors -
NEWT: I may have been a little strong in the way that I expressed myself in that letter -
TINA: What was the exact phrase? "A bunch of careerist hypocrites"?
NEWT: I'm sorry, but I can't admire people whose answer to everything that they fear or misunderstand is "kill it"!
TINA: I'm an Auror and I don't -
NEWT: Yes, and that's because you've gone middle head!
TINA (stopping): Excuse me?
NEWT: It's an expression derived from the three heads of the Runespoor. The middle one is the visionary. Every Auror in Europe wants Credence dead - except you. You've gone mi ~ J.K. Rowling

NEWT (serious): Jacob?
JACOB: Yeah?
NEWT: In my case, in the pocket there, you'll find a pair of tweezers.
JACOB: Tweezers?
NEWT: They're thin and pointy -
TINA: Thin, little pointy things.
JACOB: Yes, I know what tweezers are. ~ J.K. Rowling

My philosophy is that worrying means you suffer twice." - Newt Scamander ~ J.K. Rowling

People change after a while, and they're no longer who you once knew ~ Newt Scamander

DUMBLEDORE: How was it?
NEWT: They're still convinced that you sent me to New York.
DUMBLEDORE: You told them I didn't?
NEWT: Yes. Even though you did.
A beat. DUMBLEDORE inscrutable, NEWT wanting answers.
NEWT: You told me where to find that trafficked Thunderbird, Dumbledore. You knew that I would take him home and you knew I'd have to take him through a Muggle port.
DUMBLEDORE: Well, I've always felt an affinity with the great magical birds. There's a story in my family that a phoenix will come to any Dumbledore who is in desperate need. They say my great-great-grandfather had one, but that it took flight when he died, never to return.
NEWT: With all due respect, I don't believe for a minute that's why you told me about the Thunderbird. ~ J.K. Rowling

What's going on?" Newt asked, looking back and forth between Thomas and Aris. "Why're you guys looking at each other like you just fell in love? ~ James Dashner

Opposing taxes is a key conservative value. ~ Newt Gingrich

Newt Gingrich had a horrible week in the Iowa caucuses. Only 13 percent of his ex-wives voted for him. ~ David Letterman

In a social media age, it seems that everyone lives in their own reality and that when you give consideration to Newt Gingrich, he exists in an alternate reality, at some level, where the things he says are so diametrically opposed to the record. ~ Steve Schmidt

So when you hear about Hillary's [Clinton] dishonesty, or the emails, or taking millions from the Saudis and other Middle Eastern dictatorships - remember, this is not about politics. ~ Newt Gingrich

We need to quit subsidizing the costs for illegal immigrants' residency in America immediately. How long will we allow them to siphon millions upon millions from honest taxpaying Americans by supporting their health care, welfare, education and criminal expenses? ~ Newt Gingrich

I don't understand why they call it public broadcasting. As far as I am concerned, there's nothing public about it; it's an elitist enterprise. 'Rush Limbaugh' is public broadcasting. ~ Newt Gingrich

Is the purpose of free elections to allow the most clever and vicious person to aggregate power, or is the purpose of free elections to enable the American people to have a serious conversation about their country's future and try to find both a policy and a personality that they think will carry to them that better future? ~ Newt Gingrich

But Newt had stuck with it the past few weeks because, well, horrified fascination had turned into horrified pity and then a sort of horrified affection. ~ Terry Pratchett

Good God! Think of listening to Wagner for a whole fortnight with a woman who takes about as much interest in music as a tone-deaf newt - that would be fun! ~ Marcel Proust

Teresa stood up, surprising Thomas with her confidence.
"Guess he forgot to tell the little part about me kicking him in the groin and climbing out the window."
Thomas almost laughed as Newt turned to an older boy standing nearby, whose face had turned bright red.
"Congrats, Jeff," Newt said. "You're officially the first guy here to get your butt beat by a girl. ~ James Dashner

We're all going a little craz - " He stopped; he couldn't possibly say anything worse. "I mean ... " "Just shut it," Newt said. "I know something's started in my head. I don't feel right. But you don't need to worry your buggin' panties off. ~ James Dashner

My fine friends who are perfectionists, each in their own world where they are petty dictators, could write a perfect bill. Those of us who have grown up and matured ... understand that we have to work together on the big issues. ~ Newt Gingrich

The problem isn't too little money in political campaigns, but not enough. ~ Newt Gingrich

The most important social welfare program in America is a job. ~ Newt Gingrich

I believe most evangelicals know that defeating Obama is at heart of our country's future. ~ Newt Gingrich

Things, I know, stiffen and shift in memory, become what they never were before. As when an army takes over a country. Or a summer yard goes scarlet with fall and its venous leaves. One summons the years of the past largely by witchcraft-a whore's arts, collage and brew, eye of newt, heart of horse. Still, the house of my childhood is etched in my memory like the shape of the mind itself: a house-shaped mind-why not? It was this particular mind out of which I ventured-for any wild danger or sentimental stance or lunge at something faraway. But it housed every seedling act. I floated above it, but close, like a figure in a Chagall. ~ Lorrie Moore

We need a visionary leader with very big and bold ideas. This is a very big, very bold country. ~ Newt Gingrich

Now, I know among the politically correct, you're not supposed to use facts that are uncomfortable. ~ Newt Gingrich

The one period of glory in NASA was the first nine years when they weren't a bureaucracy yet ... and they haven't gotten back to that excitement, that adventurism, and won't. So, I would take most of the NASA budget, and I would turn it into prizes for private sector. ~ Newt Gingrich

If you want to see why President Obama is worried this November, watch The Hope and the Change. ~ Newt Gingrich

Newt Gingrich and his fellow conservative Republicans talked a good game but, despite the lip service they offered about poverty and race and other social issues, they didn't really mean it. ~ Arianna Huffington

Adolescence was invented in the 19th century to enable middle-class families to keep their children out of sweatshops. But it has degenerated into a process of enforced boredom and age segregation that has produced one of the most destructive social arrangements in human history: consigning 13-year-old males to learning from 15-year-old males. ~ Newt Gingrich

If, as the popular saying goes, the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result, the people who run our public schools fit that description. ~ Newt Gingrich

If the Soviet empire still existed, I'd be terrified. The fact is, we can afford a fairly ignorant presidency now. ~ Newt Gingrich

It's a child's world, full of separate places. Give me a paper and pencil now and ask me to draw a map of the fields I roamed when I was small, and I cannot do it. But change the question, and ask me to list what was there and I can fill pages. The wood ant's nest. The newt pond. The oak covered in marble galls. The birches by the motorway fence with fly agarics at their feet. These things were the waypoints of my world. And other places became magic through happenstance. When I found a huge red underwing moth behind the electricity junction box at the end of my road, that box became a magic place. I needed to check behind it every time I walked past, though nothing was ever there. I'd run to check the place where once I'd caught a grass snake, look up at the tree that one afternoon had held a roosting owl. These places had a magical importance, a pull on me that other places did not, however devoid of life they were in all the visits since. ~ Helen Macdonald

Maybe Governor Romney in the spirit of openness should tell us how much money he's made off of how many households that have been foreclosed by his investments. ~ Newt Gingrich

I don't know who you people are, but I hope you're happy. I hope you get a real buggin' kick out of watching us suffer. And then you can die and go to hell. This is on you. ~ James Dashner

Fillet of a Fenny Snake,
In the Cauldron boyle and bake:
Eye of Newt, and Toe of Frogge,
Wooll of Bat, and Tongue of Dogge:
Adders Forke, and Blinde-wormes Sting,
Lizards legge, and Howlets wing:
For a Charme of powrefull trouble,
Like a Hell-broth, boyle and bubble ~ William Shakespeare

While abolishing judgeships and lower federal courts is a blunt tool and one whose use is warranted only in the most extreme of circumstances ... it is one of many possibilities to check and balance the judiciary. ~ Newt Gingrich

The stress of everything seemed to be making Newt fall fast. And they'd left him all alone outside the city. "You could very well save him," Janson said quietly. ~ James Dashner

He'd killed Newt.
He'd shot his own friend in the head. ~ James Dashner

If you take all the money we've spent at NASA since we landed on the moon and you had applied that money for incentives to the private sector, we would today probably have a permanent station on the moon, three or four permanent stations in space, a new generation of lift vehicles. ~ Newt Gingrich