Chlamydia Quotes

Well, listen, sweetheart. Boys only want one thing, of course, and guess what that means for you? Heartbreak. Pregnancy. Chlamydia, herpes, syphilis, crabs.
That's beautiful, Dad. You should set it to music. ~ Kristan Higgins

Poppy sighs, shaking her head. "You do realize you just connected the two biggest sluts in The British Isles, right, Brandon?" Hope gasps. "I am not a slut. I am simply generous. Call it a gift." "Yeah well, " I laugh. "Kyan's the gift that keeps on giving. Chlamydia will burn for a week or two." Poppy ~ Nicole Lynne

There, alone in the sterile room, sitting on a pink vinyl chair that boasts many cracks in its once nice upholster, you wait. You think to yourself , who would have thought I would be ringing in the New Year by urinating into a cup to see if I have chlamydia? ~ Amanda Steele

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck chlamydia? ~ Sarah Mlynowski

I gave my girlfriend something she didn't expect for Valentine's day ... Chlamydia. ~ Frankie Boyle

Well, I have chlamydia. Thanks for this, Mom. Good class. ~ Liam Hemsworth

God says, 'One woman, one man,' and everyone says, 'Oh, that's old hat, that's that old Bible stuff,'" he said. "But I'm thinking, well let's see now. A clean guy - a disease-free guy and a disease-free woman - they marry and they keep their sex between the two of them. They're not going to get chlamydia, and gonorrhea, and syphilis, and AIDS. It's safe. ~ Phil Robertson

I hate to sound like an old man, but why are these people famous? What qualities do they possess that endear them to the wider world? We may at once eliminate talent, intelligence, attractiveness, and charm from the equation, so what does that leave? Dainty feet? Fresh, minty breath? I am at a loss to say. Anatomically, many of them don't even seem quite human. Many have names that suggest they have reached us from a distant galaxy: Ri-Ri, Tulisa, Naya, Jai, K-Pez, Chlamydia, Mo-Ron. (I may be imagining some of these.) As I read the magazine, I kept hearing a voice in my head, like the voice from a 1950s B-movie trailer, saying: They came from Planet Imbecile! ~ Bill Bryson

When I travel, I get lovesick. Well, they call it chlamydia. ~ Jimmy Carr

I feel like I'm in one of those teen shows where a caring friend lets her naive schoolmate know that the popular guy in school is spreading rumors about her. Of course, those usually end with everyone finding out they have chlamydia instead of a vampire husband, but the concept is the same. ~ A.M. Robinson

Where did I get it? Smartypants, getting a gun in Gutshot, Tennessee is easier than getting chlamydia from a hooker. ~ John Green

I don't want to hear it. Go back to Sammy and get your platter of gonorrhea with a heaping side order of chlamydia. It's free. Please leave. ~ Melisa M. Hamling

I hear they're all infected with chlamydia, which just goes to show that you really can't tell who's got the clam. I mean, look at a picture of a koala ... tell me you're not shocked. ~ Elle Lothlorien

Groupies will give you Chlamydia, Edward."
"Right, Virg. Groupies throw underwear on stage. They don't throw flowers. ~ Andrew Barger

No," he said harshly, plopping down on the living room couch. "Then what was it?" "Her hair." "Huh?" "Her hair. On the app, she was a brunette, but when I got there, she was a blonde." I blinked repeatedly. Full-on blank stare. "Come again?" "I'm just saying, it's obvious that if she'd lie about something like that, she'd lie about gonorrhea and chlamydia." The ~ Brittainy C. Cherry

I stumbled in a chlamydia support group and received a standing ovation. ~ Eric W. Gagnon