Bob Uecker Quotes

I did stand-up, weird and ignorant stuff about my career - anything for a laugh.

I think my top salary was maybe in 1966. I made $17,000 and 11 of that came from selling other players' equipment.

When I played baseball I got death threats all the time
from my mother.

I knew when my career was over. In 1965 my baseball card came out with no picture.

I didn't get a lot of awards as a player. But they did have a Bob Uecker Day Off for me once in Philly.

Before broadcasting for 50-some years, I did TV, played 10 years in the big leagues, won a world championship - and played a big part in that, too, letting the Cardinals inject me with hepatitis. Takes a big man to do that.

Anybody with ability can play in the big leagues. But to be able to trick people year in and year out the way I did, I think that was a much greater feat.

How do you catch a knuckleball? You wait until it stops rolling, then go pick it up.

When I looked at the third base coach, he turned his back on me.

I led the league in go get 'em next time.

I just grew the hair on my back. Facial hair just wasn't appealing to me. I liked it on my back, though.

Sure, women sportswriters look when they're in the clubhouse. Read their stories. How else do you explain a capital letter in the middle of a word?

After getting out of the service and going into baseball I never wanted to do anything else.

If a guy hits .300 every year, what does he have to look forward to? I always tried to stay around .190, with three or four RBI. And I tried to get them all in September. That way I always had something to talk about during the winter.

Phil Niekro and his brother were pitching against each other in Atlanta. Their parents were sitting right behind home plate. I saw their folks more that day than they did the whole weekend.

The highlight of my baseball career came in Philadelphia's Connie Mack Stadium when I saw a fan fall out of the upper deck. When he got up and walked away, the crowd booed.

You throw batting practice, you warm up pitchers, you sit and cheer. You do whatever you have to do to stay on the team.

I spent three of the best years of my life in 10th grade.

Between me and my roommate, we've hit 400 Major League home runs.

I used to soak my mitts in a bucket of water for about two days. Then I'd put a couple of baseballs in the pocket and wrap it up with a rubber band. Today you don't have to do that, because catchers' mitts are more like first baseman's gloves.

People don't know this, but I helped the Cardinals win the pennant. I came down with hepatitis. The trainer injected me with it!

On TV the people can see it. On radio you've got to create it.

Let's face it. Umpiring is not an easy or happy way to make a living. In the abuse they suffer, and the pay they get for it, you see an imbalance that can only be explained by their need to stay close to a game they can't resist.

I set records that will never be equaled. In fact, I hope 90% of them don't even get printed.

Baseball hasn't forgotten me. I go to a lot of old-timers games and I haven't lost a thing. I sit in the bullpen and let people throw things at me. Just like old times.

I remember one time I'm batting against the Dodgers in Milwaukee. They lead, 2 - 1, it's the bottom of the ninth, bases loaded, two out and the pitcher has a full count on me. I look over to the Dodger dugout and they're all in street clothes.

Any teammate of mine that had a kid and a boy that was capable of playing baseball, I think I set a terrific example of 'Don't do this' and 'Don't do that.' And that's one of the things that I'm most proud of.

I hit a grand slam off Ron Herbel and when his manager Herman Franks came out to get him, he was bringing Herbel's suitcase.

I had a .200 lifetime batting average in the major leagues, which tied me with another sports great averaging 200 or better for a ten-year period: Don Carter, one of our top bowlers.

Hey, I think it's easy for guys to hit .300 and stay in the big leagues. Hit .200 and try to stick around as long as I did; I think it's a much greater accomplishment. That's hard.

Sporting goods companies pay me not to endorse their products.

The biggest thrill a ballplayer can have is when your son takes after you. That happened when my Bobby was in his championship Little League game. He really showed me something. Struck out three times. Made an error that lost the game. Parents were throwing things at our car and swearing at us as we drove off. Gosh, I was proud.

I had been playing for a while, and I asked Louisville Slugger to send me a dozen flame treated bats. But when I got it, I realized they had sent me a box of ashes.

Anyone with talent can play in the Major Leagues; for someone like me to stay around as long as I did, I think that's a much greater acheivement.

We were on for six years. We were in syndication for a while. It had its run. I still see the people from 'Mr. Belvedere,' too. We stay in touch.

I would order a dozen bats and there were times they'd come back with handles at each end.

Career highlights? I had two - I got an intentional walk from Sandy Koufax and I got out of a rundown against the Mets.