Witticism Quotes

Such is life, my fellow-mummers-just like a poor player that bluffs and feints his hour upon the stage, and then cheapens down to mere nonentity. But let me not hear any small witticism to the further effect that its story is a tale told by a vulgarian, full of slang and blanky, signifying-nothing. ~ Joseph Furphy

They all laughed and clapped, taking it for a deliberate witticism, while he had no idea what he was saying, so great was his foreboding of misfortune and his feeling of powerlessness over the future, however great his thirst for goodness and his capacity for happiness. ~ Boris Pasternak

What is certain is that I am not a Marxist, as someone said a long time ago, let us recall, in a witticism reported by Engels. Must we still cite Marx as an authority in order to say "I am not a Marxist"? ~ Jacques Derrida

That was the problem with snide comments; they invariably lost all their punch on repetition. Besides, when facing impending death, what did the odd witticism matter? ~ Lauren Willig

Besides, every experience is of value, and whatever one may say against marriage, it is certainly an experience. ~ Oscar Wilde

If you write something wrong enough, I'll be glad to make up a new witticism just for you. ~ Larry Wall

How gratifying it is to amuse. How easy it gets to toss off a witticism to ease any awkwardness, to sidestep any solemnity. When you amuse, it even seems, for the briefest possible moment that you are who you appear to be, so clever and confident and at ease. ~ Caroline Kettlewell

A man of remarkable genius may afford to pass by a piece of wit, if it happen to border on abuse. A little genius is obliged to catch at every witticism indiscriminately. ~ William Shenstone

The lads I've met in cupid's deadlock
Were - shall we say? - born out of wedlock ~ Dorothy Parker

He who cannot shine by thought, seeks to bring himself into notice by a witticism. ~ Voltaire

Somebody cracks a joke, a whole row laughs, one witticism sets off another, and, like matches, they flare up and burn down. ~ Joseph Roth

I've been living like this for a long time - about twenty years. I'm forty now. I used to be in the civil service; I no longer am. I was a wicked official. I was rude, and took pleasure in it. After all, I didn't accept bribes, so I had to reward myself at least with that. (A bad witticism, but I won't cross it out. I wrote it thinking it would come out very witty; but now, seeing for myself that I simply had a vile wish to swagger - I purposely won't cross it out!) When petitioners would come for information to the desk where I sat - I'd gnash my teeth at them, and felt an inexhaustible delight when I managed to upset someone. I almost always managed. They were timid people for the most part: petitioners, you know. But among the fops there was one officer I especially could not stand. He simply refused to submit and kept rattling his sabre disgustingly. I was at war with him over that sabre for a year and a half. In the end, I prevailed. He stopped rattling. However, that was still in my youth. But do you know, gentlemen, what was the main point about my wickedness? The whole thing precisely was, the greatest nastiness precisely lay in my being shamefully conscious every moment, even in moments of the greatest bile, that I was not only not a wicked but was not even an embittered man, that I was simply frightening sparrows in vain, and pleasing myself with it. I'm foaming at the mouth, but bring me some little doll, give me some tea with a bit of suger, and maybe I'll calm do ~ Fyodor Dostoyevsky

...it's unsportsmanlike to engage in a battle of wits with anyone who is obviously unarmed. ~ Lilian Jackson Braun

I saw that my witticism was unperceived and quietly replaced it in the treasury of my mind. ~ Flann O'Brien

One should have wit, but not wish to have it; otherwise there will be witticism, the Alexandrian style of wit. ~ Karl Wilhelm Friedrich Schlegel

I was greeted at the Magraths' apartment door by a dumpy, pie-faced woman with a frizz of unsprung black hair. She wore black spandex leggings and an oversized T-shirt with an equally oversized message stamped across the front: Don't Give Me Attitude, I Have One of My Own. This witticism ran six full lines, drawing my eyes southward over her person from wavering bosom to detumescent belly, a journey I regret even now. ~ William Landay