Vaseline Quotes

Genuinely ubiquitous computing spreads like warm Vaseline. ~ William Gibson

it's the way he uses language - which is nothing like the way fantasists used language before him. There's no sense of nostalgia. There's no medieval floridness. There's no fairy tale condescension to the child reader. It's very straight, and very clean - there's no Vaseline on the lens. You see everything clearly, not with sparkles or a flowery sense of wonderment, but with very specific physical details. ~ Joe Fassler

Martin's interest in the movie returned. Rydar pumped, Jax squirmed happily, and Martin added another dollop of Vaseline to his palm. ~ Marshall Thornton

Reading Chip's college orientation materials, Alfred had been struck by the sentence New England winters can be very cold. The curtains he'd bought at Sears were of a plasticized brown-and-pink fabric with a backing of foam rubber. They were heavy and bulky and stiff. "You'll appreciate these on a cold night," he told Chip. "You'll be surprised how much they cut down drafts." But Chip's freshman roommate was a prep-school product named Roan McCorkle who would soon be leaving thumbprints, in what appeared to be Vaseline, on the fifth-grade photo of Denise. Roan laughed at the curtains and Chip laughed, too. He put them back in the box and stowed the box in the basement of the dorm and let it gather mold there for the next four years. He had nothing against the curtains personally. They were simply curtains and they wanted no more than what any curtains wanted - to hang well, to exclude light to the best of their ability, to be neither too small nor too large for the window that it was their task in life to cover; to be pulled this way in the evening and that way in the morning; to stir in the breezes that came before rain on a summer night; to be much used and little noticed. There were numberless hospitals and retirement homes and budget motels, not just in the Midwest but in the East as well, where these particularly brown rubber-backed curtains could have had a long and useful life. It wasn't their fault that they didn't belong in a dorm room. They'd betrayed no urge to ris ~ Jonathan Franzen

You put some Vaseline under your eyes at night and under your chin, and you put a little bit on your chest and you'll avoid stretch marks and I'll get you some Vaseline, you can change your oil and fry chicken with it, too, but you best make sure you have something. ~ Tyler Perry

I started playing bass in my friend's band for some reason. It was just something I did because, well, he asked me if I wanted to play bass and he played me this song - Nirvana's version of "Molly's Lips", the Vaselines song - and he said, "You can do this! This is not hard!" and it's like a two-note song. I learned that and then I thought I was a genius. ~ Jens Lekman

My unusual beauty tip is that I often use Vaseline to take my make up off. It works great and is good for sensitive skin. ~ Rachel Bilson

I used to worry about you, Zoyd, but I see I can rest easy now the Vaseline of youth has been cleared from your life's lens by the mild detergent solution of time, in its passing. . . ~ Thomas Pynchon

Pre-forty, you can wash your face with Tide and use Vaseline for moisturizer, toss on a little mascara and lip gloss, and you're a friggin' cover girl. Those of us on the slippery slope that is the Other Side of Forty can testify
those days are so over. You pore over labels promising everything short of actual rebirth
you will buy most of them for an average of $450 per quarter once
and none of them will work. You will still be getting older and poorer with every passing purchase. ~ Jill Conner Browne

You were Marlon Brando, I was Steve McQueen, you were K.Y. Jelly, I was Vaseline. ~ Leonard Cohen

There is no romance without some lying. That's what romance is - a little bit of Vaseline on the camera lens of life. ~ Richard Jeni

3 whole Catfish, Wrapped separately
Veet (It's for Shaving your legs Only you don't Need A razor. It's with all the Girly
cosmetic stuff)
Vaseline
six pack, Mountain Dew
One dozen Tulips
one Bottle Of water
Tissues
One Can of blue Spray paint ~ John Green

Why political intellectuals, do you incline towards the proletariat? In commiseration for what? I realize that a proletarian would hate you, you have no hatred because you are bourgeois, privileged, smooth-skinned types, but also because you dare not say that the only important thing there is to say, that one can enjoy swallowing the shit of capital, its materials, its metal bars, its polystyrene, its books, its sausage pâtés, swallowing tonnes of it till you burst – and because instead of saying this, which is also what happens in the desires of those who work with their hands, arses and heads, ah, you become a leader of men, what a leader of pimps, you lean forward and divulge: ah, but that's alienation, it isn't pretty, hang on, we'll save you from it, we will work to liberate you from this wicked affection for servitude, we will give you dignity. And in this way you situate yourselves on the most despicable side, the moralistic side where you desire that our capitalized's desire be totally ignored, brought to a standstill, you are like priests with sinners, our servile intensities frighten you, you have to tell yourselves: how they must suffer to endure that! And of course we suffer, we the capitalized, but this does not mean that we do not enjoy, nor that what you think you can offer us as a remedy – for what? – does not disgust us, even more. We abhor therapeutics and its vaseline, we prefer to burst under the quantitative excesses that you judge the most stupid. And do ~ Jean Francois Lyotard

Margaret is the first person who understands that my dull universe is the place where self-loathing blends with sitcoms and dullness like vaseline coats everything I see. She's the first person I've ever really liked who wasn't me. ~ Molly Jong-Fast

The function of government is to provide you with service; the function of the media is to supply the Vaseline. ~ L. Neil Smith

The worst that could happen is you two get into a fist fight, in which I will referee but secretly be in your corner.
Oh really?
Really. I'll even rub Vaseline on your face when he isn't looking.
What would I do without you?
You'll never know. ~ Em Wolf

We look forward to seeing all of your Vaseline coated smiles terribly soon. ~ Gitty Daneshvari

Under the sink, I also found a tub of Vaseline so big that it could have only one possible use, which I didn't care to dwell on. ~ John Green

Put cotton in your ears and pebbles in your shoes. Pull on rubber gloves. Smear Vaseline over your glasses, and there you have it: instant old age. ~ Malcolm Cowley