Stupid Dumbass Quotes

I pity you Juliet. You don't know what love is. You think it's Valentine's Day, and weekends in Italy. You think it's drinking champagne in some expensive restaurant and being bought stupid bloody underwear. But that's just the trimmings. The decoration. They're just gestures. Without trust, and respect, and kindness, they don't mean shit. I thought love was about caring about someone day in and day out, about being there when it's rucking amazing and still wanting to be there when it feels like crap, I thought it was about forever. ~ Alexandra Potter

Sometimes I wish my brain didn't always have to warn me about things. Stupid people seem to live such easy, carefree lives. ~ L. H. Cosway

It seemed to me that the people who made the rules of the road had figured out everything that would help a person drive safely right down to having a sign that tells you you're passing through a place where deer cross. Somebody should stick up some signs on the highway of life.
CAUTION: JERKS CROSSING.
Blinking yellow lights when you're about to to something stupid.
Stop signs in front of people who could hurt you.
Green lights shining when you're doing the right thing.
It would make the whole experience easier. ~ Joan Bauer

If I'm in love I want to get married. That's how stupid I am. ~ Kathie Lee Gifford

You made a mistake. One fucking enormous, stupid mistake. That's all. Now get over it. Buck up and fix it, and if you can't fix it, keep going anyway. It's the only way to live. ~ Vanessa Diffenbaugh

In Boulder, being of narrow mind was a much worse sin than appearing stupid. ~ Stephen White

A quote has an even more powerful effect if we presume not just a particular author behind it, but God, nature, the unconscious, labor, or difference. These are strong fetishes, each conjuring the powerful submedial in a particular way. Yet all of them must nonetheless be exchanged in a certain rhythm according to the laws of the medial economy. In order to create such fetishes, one does not have to use brilliant quotes by famous authors but can use anonymous quotes that stem from the author- less realm of the everyday, lowly, foreign, vulgar, aggressive, or stupid. Precisely such quotes produce the effect of medial sincerity, that is, the revelation of a deeply submerged, hidden, medial plane on the familiar medial surface. It then appears as if this surface had been blasted open from the inside and that the respective quotes had sprung forth from the submedial interior - like aliens. All of this, of course, refers to the economy of the quote as a gift that can be offered, accepted, and reciprocated. ~ Boris Groys

Whenever man begins to doubt himself, he does something so stupid that he is reassured. ~ Stanislaw Jerzy Lec

Some dumbass outside the reserve thinks you're wearing a butterfly on your arm, you'll get your ass kicked, Rafael said. ~ Rose Christo

The Cyclops was about to roll the stone back into place, when from somewhere outside Annabeth shouted, "Hello, ugly!"

Polyphemus stiffened. "Who said that?"

"Nobody!" Annabeth yelled.

That got exactl;y the reaction she'd been hoping for. The monster's face turned red with rage.

"Nobody!" Polyphemus yelled back. "I remember you!"

"You're too stupid to remember anybody," Annabeth taunted. "Much less Nobody."

I hoped to the gods she was already moving when she said that, because Polyphemus bellowed furiously, grabbed the nearest boulder (which happened to be his front door) and threw it toward the sound of Annabeth's voice. I heard the rock smash into a thousand fragments.

To a terrible moment, there was silence. Then Annabeth shouted, "You haven't learned to throw any better, either!"

Polyphemus howled. "Come here! Let me kill you, Nobody!"

"You can't kill Nobody, you stupid oaf," she taunted. "Come find me!"

Polyphemus barreled down the hill toward her voice.

Now, the "Nobody" thing would have confused anybody, but Annabeth had explained to me that it was the name Odysseus had used to trick Polyphemus centuries ago, right before he poked the Cyclops's eye out with a large hot stick. Annabeth had figured Polyphemus would still have a grudge about that name, and she was right. In his frenzy to find his old enemy, he forgot about resealing the cave entrance. Ap ~ Rick Riordan

Bans are laws for the stupid. ~ Henning Von Tresckow

The stupid thing about anger is how people hurt you and then you let them keep hurting you by being angry about how they originally hurt you. It's a vicious cycle. ~ Susane Colasanti

What I was thinking, in that strange way you can think without words while you are dancing, think in glyphs, think in numbers, was how stupid it is that any of us are here, living. What an absurd game we play with ourselves, as if it mattered. We are all mad, all insane, all deluded. It is all for nothing, really, in the end. ~ Meg Howrey

My parents are muggles, mate. They don't know nothing about no deaths at Hogwarts, because I'm not stupid enough to tell them. ~ J.K. Rowling

What? (Nick)
You one of them humans can't follow Simi speak. That's okay. This is why the Simi don't bother talking to most humans 'cause, no offense, you all weird. Some of you even stupid. Real stupid. Like stump stupid. It's the lack of hornays, I say. See, only really smart creatures have hornays…except for them moo moo cows – they not bright. But akri says there's always an exception to every rule. So they would be the exception to the hornay one. But they taste really good so the Simi will forgive them for bringing down her bell curve of superior intellect over all the other nonhorned subspecies. (Simi ~ Sherrilyn Kenyon

We're here, and it's nighttime. So according to my calculations, we must not have done anything stupid. ~ Tahereh Mafi

So basically, I think music at its best can be everything. It can be totally stupid and very intellectual and emotional at the same time. I don't think all those things shut each other out. ~ Ville Valo

As an actor you're only supposed to be a lover. I am a romantic hero though I don't like that tag. With all the hardships, problems, illness, goodness, badness, awards and money ... an actor will always be a lover. And a lover makes mistakes. You'll be silly, nonsensical and stupid. ~ Shahrukh Khan

Swearing on the Bible, you understand that shit? They tell you to raise your right hand and put your left hand on the Bible. Does this stuff really matter, which hand? Does God really give a fuck about details like this? Suppose you put your right hand on the Bible and you raise your left hand. Would that count? Or would God say, 'Sorry, wrong hand, try again'? And why does one hand have to be raised? [...] But let's get back to the Bible, America's favorite national theatrical prop.

Suppose the Bible they hand you to swear on is upside down, or backward, or both, and you swear to tell the truth on an upside-down backward Bible. Would that count? Suppose the Bible they hand you is an old Bible and half the pages are missing. Suppose all they have is a Chinese Bible. In an American court. Or a Braille Bible, and you're not blind. Suppose they hand you an upside-down, backward, Chinese, Braille Bible with half the pages missing. At what point does all of this stuff just break down and become just a lot of stupid shit that somebody made up? They fuckin' made it up, folks, it's make-believe! It's make-believe [...] Bible or no Bible, God or no God, if it suits their purposes, people are going to lie in court. ~ George Carlin

I thought Marie could handle whatever came along. I thought of her as someone who did whatever she wanted to. That's what she would have said. She skipped school a lot, and when she did come, no one seemed to care what she did. The principals and teachers at school had already given up on Marie. They hardly even saw her, except as some kind of blemish. She could have stood on her head wearing a burlap bag, and nobody would have noticed all that much. They thought she was stupid. She wasn't stupid. ~ Lynne Rae Perkins

Doing something stupid and reckless is not a better proof of your love than doing something measured and powerful. ~ Robin Hobb

Before the Sex Pistols, music was so bloody serious, all run by university graduates. It was all head music devoid of any real intellectualism. There was no deep though in it, merely images pertaining to something mystical, too stupid and absolutely devoid of reality. How on earth were we supposed to relate to that music when we lived in council flats? We had no money, no job, no nothing. So the Pistols projected that anger, that rock-bottom working-class hate. ~ John Lydon

I tried to cheer her up. We watched movies in bed. I sang to her even - though I sang like shit. And when she was too tired to read ... I read to her. Her stupid historical romance books. About dukes and London and far away kingdoms that no longer existed in society. She loved it. So I loved it. ~ Rachel Van Dyken

The person, be it gentleman or lady, who has not pleasure in a good novel, must be intolerably stupid. ~ Jane Austen

We will, in fact, be greeted as liberators. ~ Dick Cheney

Just ... if you notice I'm talking too much or someone seems particularly interested in what I'm asking about, let me know. That's all. Just ... have my back."'
"Have ... back?"
"Have my back. Simply make sure that I don't put me foot in it."
"Foot?"
He rolled his eyes. "Gods, you're literal. I mean make sure I don't talk us into a bad situation."
"Oh. Step on dick."
His eyes widened. "Pardon?"
"When men do stupid thing ... we say they step on dick."
"That would imply an impressively sized dick. ~ G.A. Aiken

Some people might say it's not smart to be so insecure about what you wear. But that's not how I see it. The stupid woman is the one who thinks she doesn't need any help. What does a man know about things like that? a stupid woman thinks, and proceeds to make the wrong choice. ~ Herman Koch

The strength of the computer lies in its being a logic machine. It does precisely what it is programed to do. This makes it fast and precise. It also makes it a total moron; for logic is essentially stupid. ~ Peter Drucker

Anything that might come under arts should not be subject to the whims of the idiotic market because the market's stupid, and it gravitates toward simplicity - towards essentializing things so they can be sold. ~ Aleksandar Hemon

Stupidity combined with arrogance and a huge ego will get you a long way. ~ Chris Lowe

You do. Jordie Thomas is not a take-home-to-Momma kind of man." "No, he isn't," she agreed. "But he is a fuck-you-stupid kind of man. ~ Toni Aleo

We are a stupid species with smart phones. ~ Abhijit Naskar

Off so stupid mothers... so stupid plans... what are you planning..., for god sake??? ~ Deyth Banger

This stupid infatuation had to stop. I was Trina Clemons, future valedictorian of Sky Ridge High. I had plans. Plans that didn't involve any detours with slacker party boys who wore shoelaces in their hair. ~ Lisa Brown Roberts

Here's the second joke: Two psychiatrists meet on the street and say hello. "How are you?" asks one. "Eh, not so good," says the other. "I had a stupid misunderstanding, a slip of the tongue. I was visiting my mother out at the old folks' home. We were having lunch and I asked her to pass me the salt, but instead I said, 'You fucking bitch you ruined my life. ~ David Rakoff

I don't imagine you will dispute the fact that at present the stupid people are in an absolutely overwhelming majority all the world over. ~ Henrik Ibsen

But [religious faith]'s not extinct, Janet. It's become nearly universal in the fleet and is growing very quickly in the Alliance."

"Yes, and that's why I cannot now or I think ever will have a chosen faith. There should be no pressure for the path one takes. Oh, it's no secret that Islam has more of an appeal to me than the others, but Allah understands this as he understands all things. The notion of faith is, I believe, far more important than the choice of a particular one."

"And what of the unfaithful?" asked Justin. "What of them?"

"If they have faith, I believe they'll have greater understanding of things; if not, I can't order someone to believe. It would be stupid to try and evil to force someone to pretend. As if God wants frightened adherents bowing on trembling knees. The harm all those fanatics did before the Grand Collapse," she said with true rancor, "those idiots I'd shoot, if I had the ability. ~ Dani Kollin

First thing I'd do is make sure the poor newbie demigods don't have to suffer through the orientation film."
All conversation stopped. "What orientation film?" Will Solace asked.
Nico looked puzzled. "You know ..." He glanced side to side, clearly uncomfortable with everybody watching him. Finally he cleared his throat and sang in a warbly voice to the tune of "The Hokey Cokey": "It lets the demigods in! It shuts the monsters out! It keeps the half-bloods safe, but turns mortals all about! It's Misty, and it's magic, and it makes me want to shout: the border is all about!" He punctuated the last line of the song with some half-hearted claps.
We stared at him in stunned silence.
"Nico." Will patted his boyfriend's arm. "You're scaring the other campers."
"More than usual," Julia Feingold muttered under her breath.
"Oh, come on," Nico protested. "You've all heard that annoying song, right? It's from Welcome to Camp Half-Blood."
Nobody responded.
"The orientation film," Nico added.
We shared a group shrug.
Nico groaned. "You mean I just sang in public and ... I'm the only one who's ever seen that stupid film?"
"So far, anyway," said Connor Stoll. ~ Rick Riordan