Sophie Jordan Quotes

Well, I guess that answers my question." The deep velvet voice startles me.
I jump, grab my pillow like I'm going to use it as a weapon.
Will stands in the doorway, sipping from a metallic travel mug. His gray T-shirt stretches across his shoulders and chest in a way that makes my throat close up.
"What question?" I ask, breathless.
"Whether you're as beautiful in the morning as you are during the rest of the day."
"Oh," I say dumbly, pushing the tangle of hair back off my shoulders, certain I don't look good right now, just rolling out of bed. Not that I take pains with my appearance on the average day, but still...who looks their best fresh out of bed? "You're here again," I murmur.
"Apparently."
"Can't stay away?"
"Apparently not."
I'm okay with that. Great, in fact.
"I made you breakfast," he adds.
"You can cook?" I'm impressed.
He grins. "I live in a bachelor household, remember? My mom died when I was a kid. I hardly remember her. I kind of had to learn to cook."
"Oh," I murmur, then sit up straighter. "Wait a minute. How'd you get in here?"
"Opened the front door." He takes another sip from his mug and looks at me like I'm in trouble. "Your mom really should lock the door when she leaves."
I arch a brow. "Would that have kept you out?"
He smiles a little. "You know me well. ~ Sophie Jordan

Holding a hand over my eyes, I look up at him. "Thanks, I'm glad were ... friends." I say the word friends deliberately, letting the emphasis get my point across. His mouth curves with a slow smile. "I've never wanted to be your friend, Jacinda." My heart stutters in my chest. Standing in the pouring rain, I watch him walk away. ~ Sophie Jordan

He may be stronger, but I'm not defenseless. He knows that, of coarse. That's why he's here. He wants me for what I can do after all. ~ Sophie Jordan

It's easier for parents to ignore, to pretend that everything's great and then do whatever they want while convinced it's something you want, too. ~ Sophie Jordan

I'm not going to lie to you and convince you that I'm someone good and shiny like your guy that's going to be a doctor. ~ Sophie Jordan

I wait for him to announce my presence, holding his gaze, refusing to look away, determined that this beautiful boy see the face he sentences to death with this next words. ~ Sophie Jordan

His expression is inscrutable. His eyes look strange with their pulsing pupils. "You're not like other girls. You're special."
Intoxicating warmth crawls over my cheeks. I'm glad at this confession. Glad that I'm as unique to him as he is to me. Back home, I only ever felt safe, protected, and revered. Even with Cassian, I never felt like he liked me for me, but rather for what I brought the pride.
Every moment with Will, I feel at risk, exposed. Danger hands close, as tangible as the heavy mists I've left behind. And I can't get enough of it. Of him. I crave his nearness still. Like a drug needed to survive, to get by each day. An addiction. A powerful, consuming thing.
"I've tried to deny it," he continues, "but it's there, staring me in the face every time I see you. If you were like other girls . . ." He laughs hoarsely. "If you were like other girls I wouldn't even be here. ~ Sophie Jordan

Jacinda nearly manifested at school today, Tamra tattles in that singsong voice of whiny kids everywhere. It reminds me of when I would take her dolls and give them haircuts. ~ Sophie Jordan

Thanks for getting me out of there," I murmur, lacing my fingers around my knees, and looking up at him on his step.
"Yeah. You looked a little green. "
"I don't handle crowds too well. I've always been that way, I guess."
"You might get in trouble," he warns, staring at me in that strange, hungry way that unravels me. He strokes his bottom lip with a finger. For a flash of a second, his eyes look strange. Different. All glowing irises and thin dark pupils. Almost drake-like. I blink to clear my vision. His eyes are normal again. Just my imagination in overdrive. I'm probably projecting missing home and Az - everything--onto him. "Pep rallies are mandatory," he continues. "A lot of people saw you leave. Teachers included."
"They saw you leave, too," I point out.
He leans to the side, propping an elbow on one of the steps behind him. "I'm not worried about that. I've been in trouble before." He smiles a crooked grin and holds up crossed fingers. "The principal and I are like this. The guy loves me. Really."
Laughter spills from me, rusty and hoarse.
His grin makes me feel good. Free. Like I'm not running from anything. Like I could stay here in this world, if only I have him.
The thought unsettles me. Sinks heavily in my chest. Because I can't have him. Not really. All he can ever be for me is a temporary fix.
"But you're worried I'll get in trouble?" I try not to show how much this pleases me. I've managed to ignore him for days n ~ Sophie Jordan

You cold?' He chafes my arms. I haven't been cold since I moved here. This is something else. 'No. But you can put your arms around me anyway. ~ Sophie Jordan

Why are you here?"
His chest lifts on a deep breath. "I'm done."
"Done with what?"
"Done letting you avoid me."
I cock my head. I hadn't run him off? Could it be so simple? So easy? Poof! He's here whether I like it or not. I didn't even need to convince him that I had changed my mind? "Are you sure that's a good idea?"
Because I'm not. Like the truest coward, when presented with my self-professed goal, doubts assail me. I'm not sure I'm ready for him. Even if being with him gets me the information I need about other prides, I'm still left with the issue of manifesting whenever I'm too close to him. And I want to be close to him. Can I be with him without being with him? In my true form?
Am I capable of that kind of control?
"I'm sure," he answers in a firm voice. ~ Sophie Jordan

But you're worried I'll get in trouble?" I try not to show how much this pleases me. I've managed to ignore him for days now and here I sit. Lapping up his attention like a neglected puppy. My voice takes on an edge. "Why do you care? I've ignored you for days."
His smile fades. He looks serious, mockingly so. "Yeah. You got to stop that."
I swallow back a laugh. "I can't."
"Why?" There's no humor in his eyes now, no mockery. "You like me. You want to be with me."
"I never said-"
"You didn't have to."
I inhale sharply. "Don't do this."
He looks at me so fiercely, so intently. Angry again. "I don't have friends. Do you see my hang with anyone besides my jerk cousins? That's for a reason. I keep people away on purpose," he growls. "But then you came along..."
I frown and shake my head.
His expression softens then, pulls at some part of me. His gaze travels my face, warming the core of me. "Whoever you are, Jacinda, you're someone I have to let in."
He doesn't say anything for a while, just studies me in that intense way. His nostrils flare, and again it's like he's taking in my scent or something. He continues, "Somehow, I think I know you. From the first moment I saw you, I felt that I knew you."
The words run through me, reminding me of when he let me escape in the mountains. He's good. Protective. I have nothing to fear from him, but everything to fear from his family.
I scoot closer, the draw of him too great. My w ~ Sophie Jordan

Then again, there's nothing simple about Will. I think back to what he can do - bend earth, resist shading, his immense strength - and it's glaringly inaccurate to consider him a human. But then I can't think of him as a draki either. And this strikes me as sad. Will doesn't belong anywhere. Not among humans. Not among draki.
But he belongs with me. The conviction is still there, as senseless and dangerous as always, seeping into my bones, my heart. A fact I wouldn't change even if I could. ~ Sophie Jordan

Her heart was broken, but it had not stopped beating. ~ Sophie Jordan

Your mother told you," he states flatly.
"Yeah," I snap. "She told me."
"She doesn't know everything. She doesn't know me...or how I feel. I would never force you to do anything against your will, and I would never, ever let anyone harm you."
His words enrage me. Lies, I'm convinced. My hand shoots out, ready to slap that earnest look off his face. The same earnest look he'd given me the first time he lid to my face.
He catches my hand, squeezes the wrist tight. "Jacinda-"
"I don't believe you. You gave me your word. Five weeks-"
"Five weeks was too long. I couldn't leave you for that long without checking on you."
"Because you're a liar," I assert.
His expression cracks. Emotion bleeds through. He knows I'm not talking about just the five weeks. With a shake of his head, he sounds almost sorry as he admits, "Maybe I didn't tell you everything, but it doesn't change anything I said. I will never hurt you. I want to try to protect you."
"Try," I repeat.
His jaw clenches. "I can. I can stop them."
After several moments, I twist my hand free. He lets me go. Rubbing my wrist, I glare at him. "I have a life here now." My fingers stretch, curl into talons at my sides, still hungry to fight him. "Make me go, and I'll never forgive you."
He inhales deeply, his broad chest lifting high. "Well. I can't have that."
"Then you'll go? Leave me alone?" Hope stirs.
He shakes his head. "I didn't say that."
"Of course n ~ Sophie Jordan

After running for my life from hunters, a girl with too much lip gloss doesn't register on my fear radar. ~ Sophie Jordan

Run from me, Grier Hadley, and I'll follow. I'll track you down and find you. ~ Sophie Jordan

He would be damned if he fell prey to love's debilitating thrall. ~ Sophie Jordan

I shook my head. "Tomorrow you won't even remember my name, my face - "
He stepped closer, eyes scanning me. "Emerson Wingate. Dark hair with reddish highlights. Bright blue eyes." His gaze dipped, roaming over me. "Hundred ten. Hundred fifteen pounds. Your hands . . ." He plucked one of my hands up, pressing his palm flush to mine. He considered our kissing palms, my hand so much smaller than his own. The tips of my fingers barely passed his middle knuckle.
"Beautiful hands." My chest tightened at his deep voice washing over me. "Slender. Fine-boned but strong. Like they play an instrument. Piano maybe?" His eyes locked with mine. A dark eyebrow arched in question.
"I-I paint," I admitted.
He smiled as if he had just solved some kind of puzzle. "You paint," he echoed and continued, marking characteristics like he was reading off a chart. "Skin smooth. Pale. A tight little body perfect for tying guys up in knots."
My eyes shot to his face and I yanked my hand away from his. I rubbed my palm against my thigh, still feeling his touch there. "Go to hell."
"Temperamental." He gave me his half smile. "See? I'll remember you. ~ Sophie Jordan

I never knew it happened like that."
I snap my gaze to her. "What?"
"You know. Romeo and Juliet stuff. Love at first sight and all that."
"It's not like that," I say quickly.
"You could have fooled me." We're up again. Catherine takes her shot. It swishes cleanly through the hoop.
When I shoot, the ball bounces hard off the backboard and flies wildly through the air, knocking the coach in the head. I slap a hand over my mouth. The coach barely catches herself from falling. Several students laugh. She glares at me and readjusts her cap.
With a small wave of apology, I head back to the end of the line.
Will's there, fighting laughter. "Nice," he says. "Glad I'm downcourt of you."
I cross my arms and resist smiling, resist letting myself feel good around him. But he makes it hard. I want to smile. I want to like him, to be around him, to know him. "Happy to amuse you."
His smile slips then, and he's looking at me with that strange intensity again. Only I understand. I know why. He must remember...must recognize me on some level even though he can't understand it.
"You want to go out?" he asks suddenly.
I blink. "As in a date?"
"Yes. That's what a guy usually means when he asks that question."
Whistles blow. The guys and girls head in opposite directions.
"Half-court scrimmage," Will mutters, looking unhappy as he watches the coaches toss out jerseys. "We'll talk later in study hall. Okay?"
I nod, my chest ~ Sophie Jordan

You are no one in my life," she said in a voice fraught with tension. "You cannot tell me what to - "
"Oh, I can," he bit out, his voice a gravelly purr that abraded her skin and sparked something inside her. His hand slid around her nape and hauled her closer. His pirate's eyes swallowed her up and forced all the air out from her lungs in one great rush. "I will."
She opened her mouth to protest, but his mouth covered hers. Claimed her. It was the only word for it. This was a taking. And she the taken. ~ Sophie Jordan

A moment later, as he pulls away from the curb, I'm assuming the ride to school will be awkward with my sister in the back. It's confirmed when she asks, "So what's the deal with you and my sister?"
He laughs shortly and rubs the back of his neck like something is there, tickling, tapping.
"Tamra." Clutching the dashboard, I turn and glare at her. "There is no deal."
She snorts. "Well, we wouldn't be sitting here if that was the case now, would we?"
I open my mouth to demand she end the interrogation when Will's voice stops me.
"I like your sister. A lot."
I look at him dumbly.
He looks at me, lowers his voice to say, "I like you."
I know that, I guess, but heat still crawls over my face. I swing forward in my seat, cross my arms over my chest and stare straight ahead. Can't stop shivering. Can't speak. My throat hurts too much.
"Jacinda," he says.
"I think you've shocked her," Tamra offers, then sighs. "Look, if you like her, you have to make it legit. I don't want everyone at school whispering about her like she's some toy you get your kicks with in a stairwell."
Now I really can't speak. My blood burns. I already have one mother doing her best to control my life. I don't need my sister stepping in as mother number two.
I know," he says. "That's what I'm trying to do now - if she'll let me."
I feel his gaze on the side of my face. Anxious. Waiting. I look at him. A breath shudders from me at the intensity in h ~ Sophie Jordan

Sudden conviction races through me, almost terrifying in its total certainty. I can't give him up. He's the other part of me. He gets what it feels like to be separate from everything and everyone, to reject the path others lay out for you. We're the same. Two sides to the same coin. ~ Sophie Jordan

Cassian looks at me intently, his eyes more black than purple right then. The purple only shows itself when he's feeling emotion. A rarity it seems. ~ Sophie Jordan

I'll find you. I will. We'll be together again. ~ Sophie Jordan

Feeling his heart, it occurs to me that it beats just like everyone else's. Like mine. ~ Sophie Jordan

We're just doing our best to live in this world, Davy." Sean's voice stretches into the fading dark. "We're not perfect, but we're not monsters, either. We're just human. ~ Sophie Jordan

People wait their whole lives for this. Sometimes half their lives pass before they find it. Sometimes they never do. They settle for something else. Or nothing at all. But we found each other now, Georgia. Do you know how lucky that makes us? ~ Sophie Jordan

He doesn't say anything for a while, just studies me in that intense way. His nostrils flare, and again it's like he's taking in my scent or something. He continues, "Somehow, I think I know you. From the first moment I saw you, I felt that I knew you."
The words run through me, reminding me of when he let me escape in the mountains. He's good. Protective. I have nothing to fear from him, but everything to fear from his family.
I scoot closer, the draw of him too great. My warming core, the vibrations inside my chest feel so natural, so effortless around him. I know I need to be careful, exercise restraint, but it feels so good.
The pulse at his neck skips against his flesh. "Jacinda."
My skin ripples at his hoarse whisper. I stare up at him, waiting. He slides sown to land solidly on my step. He brings his face close to mine, angles his head. His breath is hard. Fast. Fills the space, the inch separating us.
I touch his cheek, see my hand shake, and quickly pull it back. He grabs my wrist, places my palm back against his cheek, and closes his eyes like he's in agony. Or bliss. Or maybe both. Like he's never been touched before. My heart squeezes. Like I've never touched anyone before.
"Don't stay away from me anymore."
I stop myself, just barely, from telling him I won't. I can't promise that. Can't lie.
He opens his eyes. States starkly, bleakly. "I need you. ~ Sophie Jordan

In this, with him ... I'm as close to the sky as I've ever been. ~ Sophie Jordan

The world was a merciless place. Hard and cruel. Except when you found someone to trust and love. Life, however fleeting, possessed meaning then. ~ Sophie Jordan

Hall nestled, stretched out like a sleeping beast. ~ Sophie Jordan

His low voice breaks the stillness. "You didn't say what you were doing out this late."
"I couldn't sleep either," I reply. Not a lie.
His mouth curves. "So we're perfect for each other. A pair of insomniacs."
Perfect for each other.
I grin a mad, stupid smile. ~ Sophie Jordan

See you soon (but not soon enough). ~ Sophie Jordan

His hand glides down my arm, folds over my hand. His fingers lace with mine, palms kissing. I can feel the fast thud of his heart through this single touch. ~ Sophie Jordan

Soft hearts bled, and in their pain they caused grief and havoc. ~ Sophie Jordan

I was immediately swept up in Ariane's story. Equal parts thrill-ride and love story, The Rules is intense and emotional. This book stays with you long after you finish. ~ Sophie Jordan

Reece's face loomed over me. "Pepper? Pepper?"
He sounded so panicked. I wanted to tell him everything was going to be all right. That I was fine. I wanted to thank him for coming, for giving me the strength to keep going, to keep fighting.
I wanted to say all these things. All these things and more. But I couldn't. I couldn't catch my breath. My hand drifted to my chest, as though I could find some switch there to help open up my oxygen-starved lungs.
There was no switch.
I wheezed, terrible little sounds escaping my lips as I struggled for more air. Spots danced before my eyes, and I hated that most of all. The edges of my vision grayed. I could barely see Reece anymore. My gaze strained, as if struggling to memorize his face. Overheated and marred with soot, it was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.
I could hear him, though, screaming my name again and again. Could feel him. His hands on my arms, my face.
My vision went dark, and just before that darkness rolled in on my mind, I got out two words. Just two words. But they were good ones. I hoped he heard them.
"Love. You. ~ Sophie Jordan

Miss me?" she asks with her usual wryness, tossing her backpack on the floor and dropping down on the bed beside me like she comes over all the time. "I feel like a rebel just knowing you. Everyone keeps asking me if you really lit Brooklyn on fire."
I arch a brow. "On fire?"
Catherine pumps up a pillow beneath her head. "The actual event has gotten a bit exaggerated." Her lips twitch. "Maybe I had something to do with that."
"Nice. Thanks."
"No problem."
"So I guess I'm pretty much done for at school." For the first time, it matters to me. If I'm to stay here and make a go of it, it wouldn't hurt to have a few friends. To not be a social outcast. Especially since it seems pretty important for Tamra's success at school, too.
"Are you kidding? You're a hero." Her lips twist with a smile. "I think you've got a shot at homecoming queen next fall."
I give a short laugh, and then her words sink. Next fall. Might I be here then? With Will? It's almost too sweet to believe.
"So," Catherine beings, picking at the loose paper edging my spiral. "Rutledge was absent today."
"Yeah?" I try for nonchalance.
"Yeah." She stretches the word, her blue-green eyes cutting meaningfully into mine. "And his cousins were around, so he's not off somewhere with them. I wonder..." She cocks her head, her long, choppy bangs, sliding low across her forehead. "Wherever could he have been?"
I shrug and pick at the flaking tip of my pencil.
She con ~ Sophie Jordan

A hunter in love with his prey. ~ Sophie Jordan

When I shoot, the ball bounces hard against the backboard, and flies wildly through the air, knocking the coach in the head. I slap a hand over my mouth. The coach barely catches herself from falling. Several students laugh. She glares at me and readjusts her cap. With a small wave of apology, I head back to the end of the line. Will's there fighting laughter. "Nice," he says. "Glad I'm downcourt of you." I cross my arms and resist smiling, resist letting myself feel good around him. But he makes it hard. I want to smile. I want to like him, to be around him, to know him. "Happy to amuse you. ~ Sophie Jordan

I touch his cheek, see my hand shake, and quickly pull it
back. He grabs my wrist, places my palm back against his
cheek, and closes his eyes like he's in agony. Or bliss. Or
maybe both. Like he's never been touched before. ~ Sophie Jordan

You're scared," he said quietly.
"Scared?" I scoffed. "Of what?"
"Of anything real. And what we have is real. You love me and it terrifies you."
"I don't love you," I lied.
He grabbed my face then, dragging me closer with both hands. "You love me. I know you do. I know it because I can see it in your eyes ... in the way you look at me." He inhaled. "It's the same way I look at you. ~ Sophie Jordan

His blue eyes drilled into me. "Why are you doing this?"
I shrugged uncomfortably. "I don't know."
He shook his head once like that wasn't good enough. "Why are you here?"
His fingers shifted, the tips sending hot little sparks up my arm. He should look ridiculous with the blue washcloth covering half his face, but he didn't. He looked human and male and all too vulnerable right then.
"Because you need someone. ~ Sophie Jordan

Pleasure suffused her and she snuggled deeper into his arms, her heart clenching when he tightened his hold on her. After a while his breathing slowed and his hold relaxed. Convinced he slept, she whispered, "You should have been my first." A small ache pinched her heart.
His chest vibrated beneath her hand, sending a thrilling shiver up her spine as his deep voice rumbled through the air, "I'll be your last. ~ Sophie Jordan

The one voice I would hear even in death. A rotting corpse in the ground, I would sit up and take notice. ~ Sophie Jordan

Yeah. A real date. Something official. You. Me. Tonight. We're long overdue. ~ Sophie Jordan

Ironic, huh? To keep that part of me alive, I have to be close to that which kills it. ~ Sophie Jordan

You're like some wild bird, aren't you? Batting its wings and flying against the cage door. Even if it hurts you. Even if it kills you. You won't stop. Even if on one is out to hurt you, you wont stop." He tucks a strand of hair behind my ear, and I flinch at the brush of his fingers on my skin.
I shrug, slap at his hand "So what? You just described everyone in here. All of us."
"No, the rest of us will keep to this cage. It's protection from the dangers outside. In here, we have shelter. Freedom. Each other. We wait for the door to open, and when its safe, only then do we go out. You? You don't care as long as you're gone. Away from the rest of us. ~ Sophie Jordan

I respond, thoughts dropping away, like pebbles plopping one by one in water, sinking down, down into dark oblivion. ~ Sophie Jordan

Oh. Yeah? Then do me a favor and explain it to me. Why is Hunter so important? Why does it gotta be him? 'Cause that's what this is about, right? You fuck me but you still want to be with him. ~ Sophie Jordan

The worst evil of all is to leave the ranks of the living before one dies. ~ Sophie Jordan

I wouldn't have waited this long for you. I would have already showed up at your dorm the minute I decided I wanted you. I wouldn't leave until I convinced you that you were mine ~ Sophie Jordan

His eyes drifted shut. without opening them, he murmured, "I like the sound of your laugh. It's real and genuine. A lot of girls have this fake laugh. Not you."
"I like your laugh, too." I whispered, feeling pulled in, cozy in the cacoon of his bed.
"Yeah?"
I flattened my palm over his chest, enjoying the sensation of the firm flesh, even warm as it was. He sighed, like my cool hand offered him some relief.
"I laugh more since you came around," he said quietly, his lips barely forming the words.
He did? I frowned. He must not have laughed at all before, then, because I didn't think he was particularly jovial.
I held him through the night. And he held me back, tucking my head beneath his chin. His arms surrounded me and kept me close to his overly warm body. Almost like I was some kind of lifeline. I felt the moment his fever broke around one in the morning. I finally relaxed and fell asleep. ~ Sophie Jordan

Where did you sleep?"
His mouth curled in a cocky grin at this question. "Where do you think?"
...
He turned his attention back to the wood and answered his own question, sounding a little bored all of a sudden. "On the couch. ~ Sophie Jordan

You can't even see it. I'm the safest thing you'll ever find ~ Sophie Jordan

Didn't she know yet? People you loved, the ones you cared about the most, they all died eventually. No one was spared. When you lost them, everything you had, all of your heart, was lost, too. It crippled you. Left you an empty shell, functioning on instinct alone. "You're horrible," she whispered, so softly that ~ Sophie Jordan

Things happen. Things that you think you'll never get over. But you do. You move on. It gets better with time. You forget. Forgive. Whatever. Life goes on and you go on with it. ~ Sophie Jordan

My imprint is there for the world to see. I don't try to hide it with my hair or a high collar. When I got ready for school this morning, I kept thinking of Sean. How proud he appears. Unapologetic. And I want to be like that. I don't want to look cowed or ashamed. I may not want to be this, but I don't want to be that girl, either. I don't want to be afraid. ~ Sophie Jordan

You want to go out?" he asks suddenly.
I blink. "As in a date?"
"Yes. That's what a guy usually means when he asks that question. ~ Sophie Jordan

I am what everyone always thought. A killer. ~ Sophie Jordan

That's what this is about then? Some blasted grudge you harbor against my father?" She muttered something indecipherable beneath her breath in a language he suspected was not English. French, perhaps? Her words were too low for him to determine. "Has the world gone mad?"
"Has it ever been sane?" he asked. He ahd decided the world a far from logical place long ago, when he'd been lost to the streets at the tender age of eight. "When you mull it over, you and I marrying is scarcely absurd. Fitting perhaps. Face it, neither of us is a feted blueblood. ~ Sophie Jordan

I glance over my shoulder, at the car following close behind us. It's impossible to see the driver. To tell if it's Cassian. After a moment, it pulls around and passes us. I sigh.
"Why do I get the feeling that I'm abducting you? Should I be on alert for sirens in the rearview mirror?"
"I left willingly." I force a grin and tease, "I don't think you'll get arrested."
"Great. You don't 'think.' That's encouraging." He gives me a wincing smile. "But maybe not. I am eighteen, after all - "
"You're eighteen? But you're a sophomore."
An uneasy look passes over his face. "I missed a lot of school a few years back. Half of seventh grade and all of eighth, in fact. I was sick."
"Sick?" I echo. That reminder of his mortality crashes down on me. It'll always be there, smoke rising between us. Xander had mentioned Will being ill, but I never imagined it as anything serious.
"How? I mean, what . . ."
He shrugs like it's nothing, but he won't glance at me. He stares at the road. "Leukemia. But I'm better now. Completely cured."
"Were you very . . . bad off?"
"For about a year. The prognosis wasn't - " He stops suddenly, like he's said too much, and I get that sense again. The feeling that he's not telling me something. That he's holding back. A muscle in his jaw ripples with tension. "Look, don't worry about it. Aren't I a perfect male specimen now?" He sends me a wink. "Don't I look healthy?"
I really didn't like when I found out tha ~ Sophie Jordan

Jacinda,
Sorry, but I had to leave town for a farm thing. Try not to knock any other teachers unconscious while I'm gone.
See you soon (but not soon enough),
Will ~ Sophie Jordan

Let's go. I don't want to keep you from the things you have to do ... like plan the next crime wave with your biker gang."
"Sure. And you don't want to miss your nail appointment."
I cocked my head. "That's tomorrow. ~ Sophie Jordan

I wish for adventure.
I wish to matter.
I wish for a home. ~ Sophie Jordan

Because I know what it feels like to be used, valued only for what you can do ... not who you are, not who you want to be. ~ Sophie Jordan

I like your sister. A lot."
I look at him dumbly.
He looks at me, lowers his voice to say, "I like you. ~ Sophie Jordan

Rage
that old familiar friend that got him through the hardest of times. ~ Sophie Jordan

No longer do I fear. No longer do I let others define me. I know what I am. What I'm capable of. That I'm a girl ... a woman who will fight to survive. ~ Sophie Jordan

Exactly what he wanted me to do. Exactly what they all thought I would do. Everyone in here. Everyone out there in the world. A world so afraid of carriers, it makes killers out of the innocent. ~ Sophie Jordan

Cassian's not a bad sort. He's not ... quite like his father."
Not quite. I pull back, certain my mother has been snatched by aliens. "Are you serious? ~ Sophie Jordan

I've been avoiding you because I'm just so damn annoyed ... " He shakes his head, sloshing water. The strands brush his shoulders rhythmically. "I don't want you risking yourself again. The human world ... Will. It's too dangerous." Cassian takes my hand. I feel his heartbeat through the simple touch, the thud of his life meeting with mine. "You dead ... it would break me." His voice whips sharply over the drum of the rainfall. "Everything I ever said to you was the truth. My feelings haven't changed for you, Jacinda. Even if you drive me crazy, here, in the pride ... you're still that single bright light for me. ~ Sophie Jordan

Can I trust him again? Even after all he said? If I do and I'm wrong, the cost is too high. My life. "You'll wait for me to agree to go back with you?" I want to be clear on this point. "You won't force me in any way? Or reveal yourself to anyone, no matter what?"
"I'll wait," he promises. "However long you need."
He'll wait. But he'll be lurking about. Nearby. Watching. And I won't always know it.
Funny how things change. In the beginning, I thought I could never stay here. Now I don't want to leave. Mostly because of Will, but also because I've decided to give Mom and Tamra what they want. A chance. It can't be all about me. If I'm strong enough, smart enough, my draki can make it. And of course, Will can help with that. A few kisses. A smile. A brush of his hand and my draki is revived. And I no longer have to hide it from him.
I can last through high school. For Mom, for Tamra. After graduation, I can go with Will when he cuts free from his family. Just two more years. We'll figure out the specifics. The how and where. For the first time since coming here, I feel the stirrings of hope. I won't let Cassian ruin that.
"You're going to wait forever," I vow. "I won't change my mind."
Cassian's mouth curves enigmatically. Like he knows something I don't. He's eighteen, but in that moment I can believe he has several more years than that on me. "Things change all the time. People change. I'll take my chances."
I shake my head. "You'll see. I w ~ Sophie Jordan

It's going to be okay, Jacinda."
I angled my head. "So I won't be punished?"
"I convinced them that you wanted to return. I told them you're eager to fall back into pride life. That you'll behave yourself and be more compliant." His top lip curls faintly, and I remember what he told me in Chaparral when he found me, that he liked me because I was different from everyone else here. Now he wants me to be the same.
I inhale sharply through my nose. Compliant. Submissive. Meek. Biddable. Do I even have it in me?
"Compliant? Jacinda?" Az giggles, unaware of the tension. "They bought that? ~ Sophie Jordan

- ... And you keep them all locked in? These visiting carriers?
- They're always watched
- But not locked in? The honor is specific to me?
- You did try to brain me. ~ Sophie Jordan

I thought you were gone, Pepper. It was bad enough to lose you the first time, but to lose you like that? I couldn't have dealt with that. ~ Sophie Jordan

No one to trust. No friends. A life of silence broken only with music. ~ Sophie Jordan

What good is safety if you're dead inside? ~ Sophie Jordan

He stares at me so darkly, so hungily that I can only nod. Agree. Of course, I feel it. "I do", I admit. ~ Sophie Jordan

Ironic. I'm here because of my inherent dangerousness, but it's my inherent politeness that makes me put up with this. With him. ~ Sophie Jordan

I see enough. I saw you. ~ Sophie Jordan

Once Dad took us to an amusement park in Oregon. Before I ever manifested. I plummeted twenty stories on a drop ride. Totally helpless to gravity. Unable to fly, to save myself ...
I feel that same helpless terror now. Because nothing I say will divert Mom off her present course. Nothing will make her realize what she's doing to me.
I'm falling.
And this time nothing will save me. No mechanical device will work its wonder and jerk me back at the last minute.
But she does realize, a small voice whispers through me. That's why she's doing it. That's why she brought you here. She wants me to hit ground. ~ Sophie Jordan

He couldn't live without being a draki, and I couldn't live without him. ~ Sophie Jordan

This is the best thing I've ever eaten." He pauses for a drink, staring at me over the rim of his glass of juice.
" It's the provolone," I say, swallowing my last bite.
"It's the chef. ~ Sophie Jordan

Before I sought truth. Now I seek justice. ~ Sophie Jordan

I have Will. Here, he's my way back to the sky. ~ Sophie Jordan

The way I feel about you, Jacinda...I know you feel it, too."
He stares at me so starkly, so hungrily that I can only nod. Agree. Of course, I feel it. "I do," I admit.
But I don't understand him. Don't get why he should feel this way about me. Why should he want me so much? What do I offer him? Why did he save me that day in the mountains? And why does he pursue me now? When no girl spiked his interest before?
"Good," he says. "Then how about a date?"
"A date?" I repeat, like I've never heard the word.
"Yeah. A real date. Something official. You. Me. Tonight. We're long overdue." His smile deepens, revealing the deep grooves on the sides of his cheeks. "Dinner. Movie. Popcorn."
"Yes." The word slips past.
For a moment I forget. Forget that I'm not an ordinary girl. That he's not an ordinary boy.
For the first time, I understand Tamra. And the appeal of normal.
"Yes." It feels good to say it. To pretend. To drink in the sight of him and forget there's an ulterior reason I need to go out with him. A reason that's going to tear us apart forever.
Stupid. Did you think you might have a future with him? Mom's right. Time to grow up.
He smiles. Then he's gone. Out the door. For a second, I'm confused. Then he's at my door, opening it, helping me out.
Together we walk through the parking lot. Side by side. We move only a few feet before he slips his hand around mine. As we near the front of the building, I see several kids ~ Sophie Jordan

I would have seen him. I know this deep in my gut where muscle meets bone and wraps tight. I wouldn't have been able to not look at him. And if I'd ever heard his voice, if he ever sang? I don't know if I could have stayed away. Good girl or not. ~ Sophie Jordan

He feels it, too. His eyes widen. A lovely hazel. Green with flecks of brown and gold. The colors I love. The colors of the earth. ~ Sophie Jordan

Shaw took my hand, his fingers lacing with mine. "Happy?" he asked.
I smiled, my chest swelling with emotion. "More than I ever thought possible."
He kissed me, murmuring against my lips, "Get used to it. This is only the beginning. ~ Sophie Jordan

Miguel: We've only gone over 100x! Mika: K - gonna roc!! Billy: Glad ur babysitting, dumbass. U know how 2 shoot, right? Mika: Screw u! Kevin: Cut the crap - stay focused treat us like animals we'll show them animals Mika: Hear that! Miguel: Payback a bitch! ~ Sophie Jordan

The heart that truly loves never forgets. ~ Sophie Jordan

Why do you care? I've ignored you for days."
His smile fades. He looks serious, mockingly so. "Yeah. You got to stop that. ~ Sophie Jordan

Just because we are carriers doesn't mean that we have to live without conscience. The minute we forget that, the minute it's every man for himself ... then all is lost. We've become the monsters they say we are. ~ Sophie Jordan

Leaning down, he whispers for my ears alone. Prove them wrong. ~ Sophie Jordan

Hi," I return, gesturing to the fish. "Nice catch."
"Yeah. I'm kind of impressed with myself. I always thought redheads were sexy."
"Ha-ha. I meant the fish."
"Ah. Yes. ~ Sophie Jordan

You are the worst kind of liar. You justify your actions. If you see a need, your arrogance precludes you from ever considering that there may be an alternative aside from your scheming and manipulations. ~ Sophie Jordan

I make grilled cheeses for lunch, one for me, two for Will. We don't have any chips, but I find a far of pickles in the pantry.
"This is the best thing I've ever eaten." He pauses for a drink, staring at me over the rim of his glass of juice.
"It's the provolone," I say, swallowing my last bite.
"It's the chef."
I smile and look away.
We listen to music. Talk. Kiss until my flesh glimmers gold-red. Warms to the touch from the deep scald at my core. He stops to watch. Leans his face close to my neck and smells my skin. Like I'm something he might taste. He sweeps his hands along my arms ... making me burn hotter.
"Is this what it's like for other fire-breathers?" he asks, winks, holding my hand up in his broad palm. "Or is it just me and my magic hands? ~ Sophie Jordan

I wont let him have you. ~ Sophie Jordan