Michelle Hodkin Quotes

I tilted my head up and asked, "What would you do if I kissed you right now?"
He pretended to think about it for an obnoxious amount of time before saying, "I would kiss you back. ~ Michelle Hodkin

Noah's eyes held my face. I swallowed hard. The juxtaposition of him sitting in a room full of people while staring at no one but me was overwhelming. Something shifted inside of me at the intimacy of us, eyes locked amid the scraping of twenty graphite pencils on paper.
I shaded his face out of nothingness. I smudged the slope of his neck and darkened his delinquent mouth, while the lights accented the right angle of his jaw against the cloudy sky outside. I did not hear the bell. I did not hear the other students rise and leave the room. I did not even notice that Noah no longer sat at the stool. ~ Michelle Hodkin

You are a girl, Mara. A girl blessed and cursed. ~ Michelle Hodkin

You are like fire; you will burn wherever you go. If contained, channeled, you can bring light, but you will also always cast a shadow. ~ Michelle Hodkin

Her graphite pencil scratches the thick paper and it is the soundtrack to my bliss. That, and her sound - dissonant, aching. Her breath and heartbeat and pulse are my new favorite symphony; I'm beginning to learn which notes will play when, and to interpret them. ~ Michelle Hodkin

I've seen her in the middle of the night and the middle of the day, with makeup and without, with her hair done up and when it's been unwashed for days. I've seen her in jeans and in silk and in nothing. I would gladly spend the rest of my life just looking at her. ~ Michelle Hodkin

I'd rather he not know the depths of my crazy. ~ Michelle Hodkin

I grabbed the sides of the machine and tried to shake it. No dice. Then I kicked it. Still nothing.
I glared at the machine. "Let them out." I punctuated my statement with a few more useless kicks.
"You have an anger-management problem."
I whipped around at the sound of the warm, lilting British accent behind me. ~ Michelle Hodkin

The colors shone, burned through. Sienna and crimson and gold, and I swallowed my name from his mouth and he kissed his from my lips, and I was incandescent as I tripped into- bliss. ~ Michelle Hodkin

I didn't know enough to hold myself back. Now I was too aware, hyperaware, and so the fear chained me. ~ Michelle Hodkin

An angel sat on one shoulder, a devil on the other. Both of them wore my face. ~ Michelle Hodkin

I looked over at him, a hump of bloodied flesh on the floor, his wire-rimmed glasses askew on his face. His eyes opened behind them. "Fuck!" My heart exploded and I covered my mouth to keep from screaming. It was the first normal reaction I'd had since waking up in here. "Fuck," I said again. Wayne's small, piggy eyes followed my every movement. He was alive. Conscious. ~ Michelle Hodkin

Maybe sometimes we can only see the truth about ourselves if someone shows us where to look. ~ Michelle Hodkin

They lie, you know. It's not easier to ask for forgiveness. Not even a little. ~ Michelle Hodkin

Fix me, this thing, what I've done- there's something wrong with me, Noah, fix it."
"I can't."
"Why not?"
"Because you're not broken. ~ Michelle Hodkin

If you don't fight, you will grow lazy and discontent under the guise of wanting peace.
You will acquire money to acquire toys but the biggest ones will never be big enough.
You will fill your mind with trash because the truth is too ugly to look at. ~ Michelle Hodkin

Have you kissed many boys before?" he asked quietly.
His question brought my mind back into focus. I raised an eyebrow. "Boys? That's an assumption."
Noah laughed, the sound low and husky. "Girls, then?"
"No."
"Not many girls? Or not many boys?"
"Neither," I said. Let him make of that what he would.
"How many?"
"Why - "
"I am taking away that word. You are no longer allowed to use it. How many?"
My cheeks flushed, but my voice was steady as I answered. "One."
At this, Noah leaned in impossibly closer, the slender muscles in his forearm flexing as he bent his elbow to bring himself nearer to me, almost touching. I was heady with the proximity of him and grew legitimately concerned that my heart might explode. Maybe Noah wasn't asking. Maybe I didn't mind. I closed my eyes and felt Noah's five o' clock graze my jaw, and the faintest whisper of his lips at my ear.
"He was doing it wrong. ~ Michelle Hodkin

Anna used to be the abstinence poster girl, but you could write a comic book about the many adventures of her vagina. It could wear a cape. ~ Michelle Hodkin

You have her smile," people said, and I remember looking into the casket at her face, wondering if that meant I'd taken it from her, and the wave of guilt descended on me. ~ Michelle Hodkin

The air around us was charged as we stood opposite each other. Healer and destroyer, noon and midnight. We were silently deadlocked. ~ Michelle Hodkin

The closer anyone gets to you, the more at risk they are of falling under your shadow, or being consumed by your flame. ~ Michelle Hodkin

Your level of neuroses will only find love in a made-for-TV movie. ~ Michelle Hodkin

A current traveled from my fingertips through to the hollow where my stomach used to be. And just like that, I was completely, utterly, and entirely. ~ Michelle Hodkin

There's nothing I want. There's nothing I can't do. I don't care about anything. No matter what, I am an imposter. An actor in my own life. ~ Michelle Hodkin

What if they make me stay? To keep me safe?""I wouldn't, if I were them."
"What do you mean?""Any minute now ... "Two seconds later, the sound of an alarm filled my ears.
"What did you do?" I said over the noise as he backed up toward the bathroom door.
"The girl who gave you the note?"
"Yes ... "
"I caught her staring at my lighter."
I blinked. "You gave a child, in a psych ward, a lighter. ~ Michelle Hodkin

Someone always says, 'Kids are mean.' 'Kids will be kids.' Which implies that the kid bullies will grow out of it someday." The muscles in his jaw tightened. His stare was unfocused and far away. "I don't think they do. I think kid bullies turn into adult bullies. ~ Michelle Hodkin

He would kiss me, right now, after everything I'd done. I was poison, and Noah was the drug that would make me forget it. ~ Michelle Hodkin

I squinted one of my eyes at Daniel.
"What are you doing?" he asked.
"This is me, giving you the side eye." I continued to squint.
"Well, you look like you're having a stroke ~ Hodkin Michelle

Today, tonight, tommorrow, forever. I was made for you ~ Michelle Hodkin

He was beautiful. And he was smiling at me. ~ Michelle Hodkin

If you order some servant to bring food, I'm leaving."
"I was going to make sure Albert hadn't moved the car."
"Oh, right. Albert the butler."
"He's a valet, actually."
"You are not helping yourself. ~ Michelle Hodkin

There will come a moment when there's nothing you want more than us. Together. When you're free of every fear and there is nothing in our way. ~ Michelle Hodkin

Pride goes before the fall. ~ Michelle Hodkin

He looked down at me, all sincere and open and with that chaos hair in his eyes and I wanted and didn't want and I had to say something. ~ Michelle Hodkin

You were planned, Noah. Engineered." Noah practically radiated frustration. "For what?"
"To be the hero," David said, looking at Noah like he was his greatest disappointment. "To slay the dragon. But you fell in love with it instead. ~ Michelle Hodkin

I kiss the inside of each knee and up, farther, the roughness of my cheek raising redness on her skin. ~ Michelle Hodkin

You have no idea what you do to me," he said as he stood. "I could barely keep my hands off you last night, even after seeing what you'd been through this week. Even after knowing how wrecked you were when you told me. And I"m going to spend an eternity in hell for that dream I had about you on your birthday. But if I could call it up again, I'd spend it twice. ~ Michelle Hodkin

Mara, I have never felt about anyone the way I feel about you. And when you're ready for me to show you," he said, brushing my hair to the side, "I'm going to kiss you." His thumb grazed my ear and his hand curved around my neck. He leaned me backward and my eyes fluttered closed. I breathed in the scent of him as he leaned in and kissed the hollow under my ear. My pulse raced under his lips.
"And I won't settle for anything less. ~ Michelle Hodkin

Sometimes, Noah, I feel an overwhelming urge to punch you in the face. ~ Michelle Hodkin

In my rush, I hadn't tied my shoelaces. Noah was now tying them for me.
He looked up at me through his dark fringe of lashes and smiled. The expression on his face melted me completely. I knew I had the goofiest grin plastered on my lips, and didn't care.
"There," he said as he finished tying the laces on my left shoe. "Now you won't fall."
Too late. ~ Michelle Hodkin

Grounded likely means no phone or computer," Jamie said. "But if I encounter an owl, I'll try to smuggle a message to the outside, okay? ~ Michelle Hodkin

You think it can't get worse than wanting someone and not having them, but it can. You can want someone, have them, and want them more. Still. Always. You can never get enough. ~ Michelle Hodkin

I was applauding Mara for her extraordinarily appropriate use of the term 'batsh*t crazy ~ Michelle Hodkin

Both of us are justifiably disturbed by this development, though it has provided a new avenue of exploration as to why the fuck both of us are so deeply weird. ~ Michelle Hodkin

The cab pulled over to the curb, and Jamie said in that voice of his, "You never saw us." "I never saw you," the driver repeated, sounding dazed. "You drove this astonishingly hot underwear model from south Texas. You wanted to lick his abs." "I wanted to lick his abs." "You're such an asshole," Stella muttered as she climbed out of the cab. "I get my kicks where I can. ~ Michelle Hodkin

The sarcasm, it burns! ~ Michelle Hodkin

...and I freaked the fuck out in earnest. ~ Michelle Hodkin

I explore the full boxes, mostly brimming with battered, dog-eared, highlighted books. The pages are worn, well-read, and I skim through them. I wonder if it's possible to know someone through the words they loved. ~ Michelle Hodkin

I will not find peace with her. But there will be no greater passion. ~ Michelle Hodkin

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, how could I ever love anyone else? ~ Michelle Hodkin

She hitches up onto the bed, her fraying denimed legs dangling from crossed knees. "You know I know you like to watch."
I reach her. Uncross those legs. "I do."
"So watch. ~ Michelle Hodkin

It's a long story that involves copious quantities of alcohol and Lolita. ~ Michelle Hodkin

Today. Tonight. Tomorrow. Forever. ~ Michelle Hodkin

I love the person I am with you. You recognize somebody in me who I want to be, who I wish I were, and I am him when I am around you. ~ Michelle Hodkin

Did I just see you litter?'
'I'm driving a hybrid. It cancels out. ~ Michelle Hodkin

Why is it that whenever anyone says something offensive, they always add 'no offense' after it? ~ Michelle Hodkin

That's what separated us from the multitudes of Them. We lived harder. Knew better. But we laughed anyway. Laughed because there was nothing else to do but give up. ~ Michelle Hodkin

I wouldn't be surprised if this were a postcoital smoke, the object of his brief affection tucking himself back into his pants or her shirt in some corridor. ~ Michelle Hodkin

When someone is hiding a secret in a house, something changes in the air. Unspoken words, half finished smiles, eggshell steps - they distort reality, they muffle truth. ~ Michelle Hodkin

It doesn't bother me," I said. "If you don't mind looking forty years old at twenty, smelling like an ashtray, and getting lung cancer, why should I? ~ Michelle Hodkin

When you love someone, you're saying you trust them. You're handing them your heart and trusting them to protect it. To keep it safe. ~ Michelle Hodkin

There," he said as he finished tying the laces on my left show. "Now you won't fall.
Too late. ~ Michelle Hodkin

Jamie said in that voice of his, "You never saw us."
"I never saw you," the driver repeated, sounding dazed.
"You drove this astonishingly hot underwear model from south Texas. You wanted to lick his abs."
"I wanted to lick his abs."
"You're such an asshole," Stella muttered as she climbed out of the cab. ~ Michelle Hodkin

I'm just glad you didn't get you greedy little claws on the OTHER sketchbook. THAT would have been embarrassing. ~ Michelle Hodkin

My heart beats her name ~ Michelle Hodkin

This is a love story. Twisted and messy. Flawed and screwed up. But it's ours. It's us. I don't know how our story will end. but I know it will start. I pick up my pen and begin to write:
My name is not Mara Dyer, but my lawyer told me I had to choose something. ~ Michelle Hodkin

He shrugged. "I have a stomach thing. Don't get close."
"Well, now you've spoiled everything," I said casually, working hard to fake it. "I was planning to seduce you in the broom closet." I pointed. "Right there."
A joyless smile appeared on Jamie's lips. "We are far too screwed-up for a goddamned love
triangle."
That's my Jamie. ~ Michelle Hodkin

If I were to live a thousand lives, I would want to make you mine in each one of them. ~ Michelle Hodkin

You told me I smelled - like bacon."
"Well," he said evenly. "That's awkward. ~ Michelle Hodkin

I'm rather sentimental about the ruins - as a child, I halfheartedly attempted suicide there now and again, always returning from post-tourist-hours expeditions with knees winking with cuts, and the occasional fracture or two. ~ Michelle Hodkin

Even if what he says is true, I am simply out of fucks to give. I had few to spare to begin with. ~ Michelle Hodkin

So we can't start a fire. We can't fly. We can't create a force field. We are the most bullshit superheroes. ~ Michelle Hodkin

When evil smiles at you, you smile back. ~ Michelle Hodkin

I wish we could make out in your bed."
Noah sighed. "As do I, but I'm afraid we have ritual burning to conduct."
"It's always something."
"Isn't it though? ~ Michelle Hodkin

That was what I would miss the most, I realized. Just being able to tell him things. There was still so much to say. ~ Michelle Hodkin

What had happened would always be part of us, but we'd survived it. We were still here. The curtain would fall ons us eventually, but I would fight to keep it up as long as I could. For now it was just us, together, and there was nothing in our way. ~ Michelle Hodkin

A thing I loved about her immediately, though, she looked back at me completely without pity. ~ Michelle Hodkin

We don't have to be what they want. ~ Michelle Hodkin

I know how you love endings, so I will write one for you. ~ Michelle Hodkin

You're stronger than you believe. Don't let your fear own you. Own yourself. ~ Michelle Hodkin

I looked up at the video camera and stared. Then raised my hand and gave it the middle finger.
"I thought you were going to give it the District Twelve salute," Jamie said. ~ Michelle Hodkin

I so badly needed to self-destruct. ~ Michelle Hodkin

You never know what another person stands to gain or lose by anything ~ Michelle Hodkin

If she watched me any closer, she'd turn into the Eye of Sauron ~ Michelle Hodkin

Pain is just a feeling, and feelings aren't real. ~ Michelle Hodkin

Then the only way out is through, Jamie said, and Stella started the truck. ~ Michelle Hodkin

I was falling apart, and all my pieces were scattering to the wind. ~ Michelle Hodkin

I laughed as I twisted to face him and raised my arm to hit in one move. He caught my wrist and my laugh caught in my throat. A mischievous grin curved my mouth as I raised my other hand to hit him. He reached over me and caught that wrist too, gently pinning my arms above my head as he straddled my hips. The space between us boiled my blood. ~ Michelle Hodkin

For as long as I can remember, I've had trouble with feelings. Other people get scared, nervous, or shy, excited, or happy, sad. I seem to have only two settings: blank or empty. ~ Michelle Hodkin

The phone rang. Joseph darted to pick it up.
"Dyer residence," he answered formally.
"Hold please," he said as he covered the mouthpiece. He really was hilarious. "It's for you, Mara," he said. "And it's a booooy," he sing-songed.
I rolled my eyes but wondered who it could be. "I'm taking it in my room," I said as Joseph erupted in giggles. Horrible. ~ Michelle Hodkin

Now be a gentleman and open the door for me. My hands are full. ~ Michelle Hodkin

I wonder if it's possible to know someone through the words they love. ~ Michelle Hodkin

There is no truth. Only perspectives. ~ Michelle Hodkin

You're the girl who called me an asshole the first time we spoke. The girl who tried to pay for lunch even after you learned I have more money than God. You're the girl who risked her ass to save a dying dog, who makes my chest ache whether you're wearing green silk or ripped jeans. You're the girl that I
" Noah stopped, then took a step closer to me. "You are my girl. ~ Michelle Hodkin

You'll love him to ruins. Unless you let him go. ~ Michelle Hodkin

Truer words were never spoken. ~ Michelle Hodkin

You can be our Gandalf," I said, remembering our conversation from weeks ago, and smiling.
"I'm only a year older than you. But I'll take it as a compliment, if you let me be Dumbledore instead."
"If you insist." I shrugged. "But Dumbledore is more dead."
"Point," Daniel acknowledged.
"You're neither, actually." Jamie looked up from a file he was reading. "You're a muggle - "
"Hey, now."
"Which makes you Giles."
Daniel considered it for a moment. "I'll take it. ~ Michelle Hodkin

Noah stood slowly, his body skimming mine as he rose. "Today. Tonight. Tomorrow. Forever." Noah's eyes held mind. his stare was infinite. "I was made for you, Mara. ~ Michelle Hodkin

We are far too screwed up for a goddamned love triangle. ~ Michelle Hodkin

Have you seen the rest of the flat?"
A single shake.
"Would you like to?"
A single nod.
"Follow." I turn away from her and pass the office without opening the door.
We turn the first corner. "How many bedrooms did you say there are?"
"Six."
"Which one's ours?"
"Tonight, all of them. ~ Michelle Hodkin