Iyanla Vanzant Quotes

A man can't be in the space where there is feminine rage and bitterness. He doesn't know how to navigate it.

Some of us pray demands. Some of us pray complaints. Some of us pray knowing, and some of us pray not knowing. But prayer is the attitude that you hold in your heart.

The goal isn't to be perfect, but to be authentic!

If you want to hear God laugh, tell Him your plans.

There is a lot of healing going on. Really! More people are vegetarians, more are in the green movement, more of us are tearing down the old paradigms and embracing same-sex marriage, single motherhood, men raising babies.

There is nothing you need to do to make yourself more acceptable to God. You don't have to work harder, nor do you need to change the kind of work you do. You don't have to give more money to charitable organizations. The reality is, God doesn't want you to give anyone anything if you only do it to impress God! God does not love you or find you acceptable because of anything that you do. God loves you and accepts you because you are a part of God.

Black Girls rock because we have no other choice.

I came from nothing. I came from the projects and welfare and ended up a millionaire with no frame of reference. I was bound to hit a wall sooner or later.

Spirituality is a journey inward that connects the Self to yourself. When you know who you are from the inside out, when you do what you sense is right for you, when your thoughts lead you to actions that serve others as well as make you feel good, then you have encountered spirituality.

I now know that nothing in my life will change until I change the way I see my life and myself.

The road of life is strewn with the bodies of promising people. People who show promise, yet lack the confidence to act. People who make promises they are unable to keep. People who promise to do tomorrow what they could do today. Promising young stars, athletes, entrepreneurs who wait for promises to come true. Promise without a goal and a plan is like a barren cow. You know what she could do if she could do it, but she can't. Turn your promise into a plan. Make no promise for tomorrow if you are able to keep it today. And if someone calls you promising, know that you are not doing enough today.

Perhaps you went to bed last night thinking about the overdue bills, the lack of finances, the problematic people and situations you have to face. This morning you woke up. Did you give thanks? If you didn't, it is probably because you forgot that when praise goes up, the blessings come down. That should be enough to inspire you to be thankful.

Whether the apple is deemed a good sign or bad sign depends on what that person believes

Use your time, energy and talents to do the best you can right now. Spend no time wishing it were better

Your divine mate already exists. When you get to the place in yourself that is peaceful divine love, your true mate will be revealed.

Instead of running from what you don't want, walk with commitment toward what you desire. Focus on where you are going rather than being obsessed with where you have been.

We go into a relationship looking for love, not realizing that we must bring love with us. We must bring a strong sense of self and purpose into a relationship. We must bring a sense of value, of who we are. We must bring an excitement about ourselves, our lives, and the vision we have for these two essential elements. We must bring a respect for wealth and abundance. Having achieved it to some satisfactory degree on our own, we must move into relationships willing to share what we have, rather than being afraid of someone taking it.

A man who is not accountable to anyone is a danger to himself

Love is what you are, not what you give or get!

Fear wears so many clever disguises it is virtually impossible to always recognize it. Fear disguises itself as the need to be somewhere else, doing something else, not knowing how to do something or not needing to do something.

When there is breakdown in a relationship, you must have the hard conversation. It may not be pretty and it may not feel good. But if you are willing to listen and tell the truth, it will open
up.

We make our days pleasant or miserable. If we insist on being miserable, irritable and nasty, more than likely the day will give us exactly what we give it. A day is too valuable to waste on misery and unhappiness.

Choice is our point of power.

Choice is a divine teacher, for when we choose we learn that nothing is ever put in our path without a reason.

Dear God, Please untie the nots. All of the can nots, should nots, may nots and have nots. Please erase from my mind the thoughts that I am not good enough.

Your job, work, life assignment must be the spark that fuels your fire. It must be a passion that you pursue. You must want it enough to do it for free. You must be willing to stick with it, taking the ups and downs, giving it all that you are for as long as you can! You've got to taste it, smell it, know it whether you are awake or asleep. If you do not have a lustful passion for your work, you really need to find something else to do.

Your interests will guide you. Give no concern to what they say you cannot do. Be willing to accept the challenge. Take time to retreat to that quiet place within the pit of your soul and unleash your right to decide what is best for you.

You must be willing to give total unconditional love to everyone, under all circumstances. That means being willing to be totally responsible for what you do and how you do it.

We must fill our minds with a truth loud enough to drown our the incessant defeatist voice of the negative ego.

Spirit is the key to everything we desire. It is our weather-proofing, our Teflon, our line of credit that assures if we just keep putting one foot in front of the other, one day; there will be a miraculous payoff.

Each of us was born to fulfill a divine purpose. As we open our hearts and minds to a new way of being, the purpose of our lives unfolds organically.

Respect you love one enough to know thay can handle your truth

Everything you have done and been through is valuable and important. In order to be who you are, to know what you know, to be where you are in this moment, you needed to go through what you went through.

If it's not your story to tell, you don't tell it.

The way you get more is by having a daily spiritual practice.

What I am doing; how I am being as I am doing it; and does it bring honor to my community? What is the lesson in what I am doing? And most importantly, am I having fun?

We know how to be doctors, nurses, lawyers. We know how to be tweeters. We know how to be everything. But how do you just be people? How do you be present with one another? How do you be honest with one another? How do you be compassionate towards one another, forgiving towards one another? We know what to do. We don't know what to be, how to be.

Begin within. If it shows up in your life, it's coming to tell you something about you that you're acting like you don't know. Something about yourself, or your relationship with God.

Talk about your negative experiences with the father, with your girlfriends. Not with your children. And bite your tongue when it comes to diminishing, denying, dismissing, name-calling.

When you really believe that you are worthy of the best, that you deserve the best & that there is enough of the best for you to have plenty, there will be no need for you to hold on to what you have. Allow yourself to imagine what your life would be like if your hands and heart were to receive something better than what you are holding onto right now.

There are no guarantees in life, but it is a sure thing that you will get back what you give. If you give 100 percent of your attention, energy, and time to a thing, you will get exactly that back. Make sure you give all that you have to make sure you will get all that you need.

Aggressive, or fine but the timing was just not right.

When you find yourself in a new situation, everything that requires healing is going to rush to the surface.

People have a right to change their minds and it has absolutely nothing to do with you. People change. As people change, their needs change. When people have a need, it is their responsibility to themselves to see their needs are met. And it has absolutely nothing to do with you.

Our beliefs are what create our experiences. As we change our beliefs, we alter our perception, our version of reality.

It is not your duty or responsibility to change the minds of other people. The nature of their thinking is advanced or limited by their experience. In your presence, they have an opportunity to learn about you and, perhaps, to grow.

Until today, you may not have realized that your life provides the content of your obituary. Just for today, examine your life. Think about all of the things you want to leave behind. Remember, the good thing about doing this today is that you still have time to rewrite your life's content if necessary.

Remain open. There is something bigger than you know going on here.

With all things in life, we do not get what we ask for, we get what we expect.

Change doesn't have to be hard, and healing doesn't have to hurt. Surely by now you know that every thing happens for a reason! There is something better awaiting you on the other side of this.

At birth, we are like cartilage - soft, flexible tissue. By the same natural process by which cartilage becomes hard bone, the soft, tender heart of an innocent child can become hardened by the circumstances into which she is born.

Act the way you want to be and soon you will be the way you act.

WE [black women] HAVE ADAPTED TO A SOCIETY THAT DOES'NT HONOR US.

Many self-employed people provide services that are nonessential. So whether you get your hair done less or your hair cut less, or your nails done less, as a writer and a speaker I was very clear that corporations weren't being as open and as generous and I wasn't getting the kind of work that I usually got.

A stable and nurturing childhood is essential for the healthy psycho-emotional and spiritual development of a human being. While we may understand what is supposed to happen to us physically, we must begin to better understand what happens to children mentally, emotionally and spiritually as a result of the families into which they are born.

The show is 'Fix My Life!' Get it? Life. I do not fix people.

If someone has offended you, insulted you, or disappointed you, let it go! If you are remembering all the ways you have been hurt or forgotten, let it go! Ask yourself, what good does it do for me to hold on to this?

Breathing deeply and releasing fear will help you get to where you want to be.

Sometimes on the journey, you step in dog poop. But you don't let the whole journey be about the fact that your shoe got poop on it.

It is an honor and a privilege to be of service and support; however, I realize people are not putting their confidence in me. Instead, they are actually learning to trust themselves. My job is to affirm and support them in the process and teach them to do what I do when I need strength: I begin within.

I try not to set myself up as different or as a celebrity or special. I have a husband that can get on my nerves. I have kids that test my patience. I've got a cat I can't keep off the sofa. It's real. On a bad day, I'm reading 'Acts of Faith.'

We really don't know how to love each other because we haven't really learned to love ourselves. In many instances, not all, it's not malicious. We've just been conditioned to such bad behavior.

FORGIVENESS IS A SILENT, INTIMATE TEACHER. SHE IS ALWAYS READY TO BRING THE LESSONS YOU NEED, WHETHER OR NOT YOU WANT TO LEARN.

Love people enough to tell them the truth and respect them enough to trust that they can handle it.

We live in a society where we're not taught how to deal with our weaknesses and frailties as human beings. We're not taught how to speak to our difficulties and challenges. We're taught the Pythagorean theorem and chemistry and biology and history. We're not taught anger management. We're not taught dissolution of fear and how to process shame and guilt. I've never in my life ever used the Pythagorean theorem!

When Oprah Winfrey tells you that you need to have your own show, you feel compelled to do it. Especially if she's gonna pay for it!

I've seen the good, the bad, and the ugly. Lived it and I'm still here to talk about it and help someone else if I can.

Whether or not we know what we are creating or how we are creating it, when things do not turn out the way we desire, our human instincts drive us to look for someone to blame.

I think most people think that a spiritual path or growing spiritually means that all of a sudden you'll be able to forecast the six lotto numbers and all your bills will be paid.

What keeps us from achieving our heart's desires is not anything outside of us, it's the conflict inside.

You have a right to your thoughts and feelings. Your feelings are always valid.

Life doesn't actually knock you down. It does, however, provide you with many opportunities to evaluate your standing in life: what you stand on, what you stand for, how you stand within yourself and for yourself.

Well the beauty of 'Iyanla: Fix My Life' is that men are in every show. To our surprise, some of the deepest healing demonstrations have been with the men - the sons, the fathers, the husbands - because they agree to participate with the wife or the daughter or whatever it is we are looking at, and it is there.

Today I am devoted to addressing all the little things about me and in my life that I have not mastered!

Don't get hung up on the hard times, the challenges. Tell your story by highlighting the victories. Because it's your victories that will inspire, motivate, encourage other people to live their stories in grander ways.

I believe that the only thing that will dispel the darkness is for the light to come on. And the lights are coming on. Here, there. People are eating more vegetables, living green, taking in and saving animals. All of that is the light coming on.

We cannot expect to be in control of the circumstances in our lives when we cannot control our minds for five minutes. Meditation is the daily minimum requirement that will prevent us from breaking down and falling apart at the most inopportune moments. It is the art of listening. It is a practice which enables us to tune in and fine-tune the key areas of our lives: the mind and the spirit.

Everyone has a purpose because God is a purposeful God.

Crying purifies and cleanses. I once read about a scientific experiment which demonstrated that there are 38 toxic chemicals in a tear of sadness, while only one toxin exists in a tear of joy. As you cry in sadness, fear, or confusion, you cleanse the body and spirit of toxins which cloud the mind and prevent it from accepting the truth.

Most of us have just learned to exercise our survival muscle. It's time to build our victory muscle.

Your greatest adversary is also your greatest teacher. Like it or not, it is the job of certain people to bring out the worst in you. What they trigger is already in you. They are here to reveal the sore, tender wounded places in your heart and mind, and they are providing you with a wonderful and divine opportunity for healing.

Abundance is a direct reflection of your preparation to live abundantly. People who are ready for abundance keep their heads up, their eyes open and give thanks for everything they get.

I don't think anybody can be held accountable or responsible for anyone's behaviors expect the individual. This goes beyond that particular situation.

When you know something or someone in your life is unhealthy or unproductive, that you have grown beyond where they are and where they want to keep you, you must let go. If you tell yourself you do not see it when you do, or if you tell yourself it will get better, you are not being honest with yourself. Stop trying to fix things or change things. Simply let go.

People are hurting. People are suffering. But you can not get everywhere.

The thing I always tell my audiences all the time is that I'm just two steps ahead of you on a good day. And I might be two steps behind you on a bad day.

I see a couple of things missing. Any society, any community, even in the family, when the elders don't do their jobs, the youth suffer. We have no done our job. I'm saying anybody 55 and up. We didn't teach people the basic things.

Planning is the only way to keep yourself on track. Plan your moments to be joyous. Plan your days to be filled with peace. Plan your life to be an experience of growth. When you know where you are going, the universe will clear a path for you.

Finally and most important of all, authenticity means that you must do what you do the way you do it and allow everyone else the same courtesy. There was a time I wanted to be like every famous writer that ever lived. I tried to copy styles, reframe information, use similar artwork. I almost drove myself crazy! Now I just do what I do. I have mentors. There are people whose work I admire, but I write the way I write. I eat the way I eat. I dress the way I dress. I can't believe that God made us each so unique only to have us do everything the same way.

Beloveds, you are fine, just the way you are! Perfect in your imperfection! You are divine! Growing brighter and more brilliant each day, you can accept the truth of who you are.

I had to get really clear about what was meaningful & what wasn't, who I was & who I wasn't & who I wasn't going to be anymore.

There is only one way to shift your consciousness from painful conditional attachments to peaceful unconditional love. You must create new love expectations based on honour, respect & support. Honour what you feel by believing you can have what you want. Respect where you are in your life, understanding that when you are ready to move forward you will. Support yourself by refusing to accept less than you want. This is your foundation.

Spiritual consciousness does not make your problems go away; it does, however, help you view them from a different vantage point.

You will stumble at time, forget what you want, fall headfirst into your old habits and beliefs. Fear not! Always remember to be patient and loving with yourself and others because that is what God does all the time.

We are distracted from our greatness because are greatness is what scares us. Right where you are ... God is.

Speak and live in simple sentences. Bring closure
put a period to
those experiences that you don't want to carry on forever and ever. Use commas in those places where you're still growing ... and use exclamation points at the end of every lesson.

There are going to be moments today you don't like me. You'll get over it.

Challenges come so we can grow and be prepared for things we are not equipped to handle now.

From speaking with my mother I learned that forgiveness is a process that begins with the choice to end your own suffering.

We see in one another the things we cannot see or accept about