If You Take Someone For Granted Quotes

What matters is that you do good work. What matters is that you produce things that are true and will stand. What matters is that the Flaming Lips's new album is ravishing and I've listened to it a thousand times already, sometimes for days on end, and it enriches me and makes me want to save people. What matters is that it will stand forever, long after any narrow-hearted curmudgeons have forgotten their appearance on goddamn 90210. What matters is not the perception, nor the fashion, not who's up and who's down, but what someone has done and if they meant it. What matters is that you want to see and make and do, on as grand a scale as you want, regardless of what the tiny voices of tiny people say. Do not be critics, you people, I beg you. I was a critic and I wish I could take it all back because it came from a smelly and ignorant place in me, and spoke with a voice that was all rage and envy. Do not dismiss a book until you have written one, and do not dismiss a movie until you have made one, and do not dismiss a person until you have met them. It is a fuckload of work to be open-minded and generous and understanding and forgiving and accepting, but Christ, that is what matters. What matters is saying yes. ~ Dave Eggers

Every so often in life, you randomly cross paths with someone that touches you in a way that you really can't explain, but somehow you know that you will never be the same again. A person that is unknowingly, so incredibly beautiful, both inside and out, that they take your breath away. Recently, I met someone exactly like that. As a matter of fact, I'm still not convinced that she isn't an angel here to protect me from myself and the rest of you crazies... these next few songs are for my angel. I hope the rest of you find your angel someday. Just remember, don't let go when you do, even if they try to fly away. ~ Erin Noelle

And that old "If you need anything, let me know," is also a total crock. You hear people say it all the time, but then you never see anyone actually call up the person who said it and say, "Hey, remember when you said to let you know if I needed anything? Well, I'm feeling really overwhelmed. Could you please come clean my kitchen, because if I could have a clean kitchen, I'd feel like I had a bit of a head start." You'll never hear someone say that, because then the person asking the other person to clean their kitchen is seen as a helpless, incompetent dick.

What would be so much better would be for the person who spouted the useless "if you need anything just ask" platitude to fucking go over to the person's house and clean their goddamn kitchen without being asked. Go over and say, "Hey, you go take care of your kid or your work, or go take a fucking nap. And when you get done, you'll have a clean kitchen. And, no, you don't owe me a goddamn thing. Someday the shoe will be on the other foot, okay? ~ Diana Rowland

What you are is a complicated girl with simple needs. You need your books and time to read, and you need a few friends and you need someone-not to take care of you, but to care for you. If you have all those things, you'll always be alright. ~ Brian Morton

It seems like it might go on for a while, so Tausolo takes a seat and looks around the sergeant's cubicle. There's not much to see, since the guy just arrived at the WTB, only a blank form tacked to a wall that looks like every other army form in the world.

"Hurt Feelings Report," it is titled. "Whiner's name," it says under that. "Which ear were the words of hurtfulness spoken into?" it says under that. "Is there permanent feeling damage?" "Did you require a 'tissue' for tears?" "Has this resulted in a traumatic brain injury?"

"Reason for filing this report," it says under that. "Mark all that apply." "I am a wimp." "I am a crybaby." "I want my mommy." "I was told that I am not a hero." "Narrative," it says under that. "Tell us in your own sissy words how your feelings were hurt." Finally at the bottom of the form:

We, as the Army, take hurt feelings seriously. If you don't have someone who can give you a hug and make things all better, please let us know and we will promptly dispatch a "hugger" to you ASAP. In the event we are unable to find a "hugger" we will notify the fire department and request that they send fire personnel to your location. If you are in need of supplemental support, upon written request, we will make every reasonable effort to provide you with a "blankey," a "binky" and/or a bottle if you so desire. ~ David Finkel

And if someone can lead me to him?" Malaki asks.

"Report back to me first. I don't want to chance losing him. Oh and by the way - " Des's eyes inadvertently land on Temper, "be discreet."

"Why are you looking at me?" Temper's voice is several octaves louder than everyone else's.

The Bargainer arches an eyebrow.

"I'm as motherfucking discreet as they come," she says.

I'm trying really, really hard not to laugh, but the struggle is real.

Malaki manages a sharp nod. "We will be discreet," he assures Des.

The sorceress huffs. "Y'all need to get your heads checked. I am not the problem." She turns on Malaki. "And you don't need to go making promises for me. I never even said I was coming along."

"And you don't need to." The Bargainer stands. "But if you imagined staying behind so that you could have fun with Callie, then you'll be sorely disappointed. The future Night Queen has official business that will take her away from the palace."

It takes me a second to realize Des is referring to me.

"Wait," I say, "I haven't agreed to be queen."

"Yeah," Temper agrees, "my girl hasn't agreed - what?" She turns on me. "Bitch, have you lost your mind? Take that crown and wear that shit like it's your birthright."

Ignoring Temper, Des's gaze falls on me, his features sharp. "I apologize, the Night King's consort has official business that will take her away from ~ Laura Thalassa

It shouldn't make any difference, but Friday and Saturday nights are the worst. They're the worst because the loneliness is magnified. The best you can do is hope that there is someone else like you out there, but if there is, you will never meet this person because she doesn't get out either.
So, you're left with your thoughts, and your thoughts are living people in your brain who call and hang up and lounge around like armed security guards who happen to be beautiful. In between these thoughts, you think about what's going on out there. The girl of your dreams is being ravaged by a man who doesn't have a care in the world. Just to hear her voice would make you happy for a week, but he gets to spend the day and night with her and thinks nothing of it. (…), there are boyfriends and girlfriends, people in love, wide awake. They hang out. They hang out. They hang out. They do nothing worthwhile except each other. Friends, friends, friends. Fiends. Inside jokes. There are so many stupid conversations going on right now. You could be having a meaningful conversation with a taxi driver. You could talk to him about how Travis Bickle's taxi was a metaphor for loneliness. (…) You have a gray tint on your contact lenses. But you have your work. They don't have that. They are cowards. Everyone seems so afraid to be alone. It takes strength to lie there alone and take it. They just want to copulate, and that's their biggest concern of the night. You want a tragedy. An assassination ~ Joey Goebel

The more familiar you become with your biography, the better you will have learned to perceive your internal signals and take them seriously, and the easier you can judge whether your therapists follow along with you and help you or whether they only serve to confuse you more. If you don't want to pay the bill for someone else's confusion, you must have the strength and the wisdom to give up a therapist or a confusing group as you would give up a mechanic who politely but blindly tried to fix your car while ignoring and wanting to ignore what was really wrong in the first place. ~ Alice Miller

I do trust you though. I think if someone tried to take me, you'd at least fight them for me a little…" I watched his face for a moment before narrowing my eyes. "Wouldn't you?"

That had his other eye popping open, his cheeks still slightly pink, but everything else about him completely alert. "You know I would."

Why that pleased me so much, I wasn't going to overanalyze.

"If someone tried to take you, I know aikido, some jiu-jitsu, and kickboxing," I offered him up. "But my dentist says I have really strong teeth, so I'd be better off trying to bite someone's finger or ear off instead."

Aaron's eyebrows climbed up his forehead almost comically. "Like a little Chihuahua," he suggested, the spoon going into his mouth with a sly grin.

I winked at him, immediately regretting it. I didn't want it to come across like I was flirting. "I was thinking more of a piranha. I've only had one filling in my entire life," I told him, wishing each word coming out of my mouth wasn't coming out of it.

If he thought I was being awkward or a flirt, he didn't make it known. "Or a raptor."

"A lion."

"A tiger."

"Did you know a jaguar has twice the strength in its bite than a tiger does?"

Aaron frowned as he took another bite of his oatmeal. "No shit?"

"No. Two thousand pounds per square inch. They're the only big cat that kills their prey by biting its head, through bone and ever ~ Mariana Zapata

TODAY can be a healthy unusual day for you-and for others-if you take time to give someone a smile ... to express a word of kindness ... to lend a helping hand to someone in need ... to write a note of gratitude ... to give a word of encouragement to someone who is temporarily overcome with problems ... to share a portion of your material possessions with others. ~ William Arthur Ward

The majority of things in life are about picking your battles. You'll learn that too. And that will never be clearer than when you're at IKEA. You'd have to visit a Danish vacation village after two weeks of pouring rain and no beer to come across as many couples arguing as you'll hear in the IKEA section for changeable sofa covers on any given Tuesday. People take this whole interior design thing really seriously these days. It's become a national pastime to over interpret the symbolism of the fact that "he wants frosted glass, that just proves he never listens to my FEELINGS." "Ahhhhh! She wants beech veneer. Do you hear me? Beech veneer! Sometimes, it feels like I've woken up next to a stranger!" That's how it is, every single time you go there. And I'm not going to lecture you, but if there's just one thing I can get across then let it be this: no one has ever, in the history of the world, had an argument in IKEA that really is about IKEA. People can say whatever they life, but when a couple who has been married for ten years walks around the bookshelves section calling one another words normally only used by alcoholic crime fiction detectives, they might be arguing about a number of things, but trust me: cupboard doors is not one of them. Believe me. You're a Backman. Regardless of how many shortcomings the person you fall in love with might have, I can guarantee that you still come out on top of that bargain. So find someone who doesn't love you for the person you are, ~ Fredrik Backman

So," he said as we turned onto the main road, the muffler rattling, "I've been thinking."
"Yeah?"
He nodded. "You really need to go out with me."
I blinked. "I'm sorry?"
"You know. You, me. A restaurant or movie. Together." He glanced over, shifting gears. "Maybe it's a new concept for you? If so, I'll be happy to walk you through it."
"You want to take me to a movie?" I asked.
"Well, not really," he said. "What I really want is for you to be my girlfriend. But I though saying that might scare you off. ~ Sarah Dessen

Loving who you are, not thinking about the inside? What to do? Well... If you think about it, it's nothing about yours looks at all. If there was a college for dumb and pretty people, guess how many people wouldn't make it into college. Me, and many, many of my friends. So you see, you can't take away what's already there... talking about intellegence (you can't take intellegence away from yourself). But if someone tries to give me a MAKEOVER, I of course immediatly try to be nice about it, but I can't really fit words for what I'm about to do. ~ Ami Riechman-Bennett

He was, he realized, comforted by her presence. They didn't need to talk. They didn't even need to touch (although he wasn't about to let go just then). Simply put, he was a happier man - and quite possibly a better man - when she was near.
He buried his face in her hair, inhaling her scent, smelling . . .
Smelling . . .
He drew back. "Would you care for a bath?"
Her face turned an instant scarlet. "Oh, no," she moaned, the words muffled into the hand she'd clapped over her mouth. "It was so filthy in jail, and I was forced to sleep on the ground, and - "
"Don't tell me any more," he said.
"But - "
"Please."
If he heard more he might have to kill someone. As long as there had been no permanent damage, he didn't want to know the details.
"I think," he said, the first hint of a smile tugging at the left corner of his mouth, "that you should take a bath."
"Right." She nodded as she rose to her feet. "I'll go straight to your mother's - "
"Here."
"Here?"
The smile spread to the right corner of his mouth. "Here."
"But we told your mother - "
"That you'd be home by nine."
"I think she said seven."
"Did she? Funny, I heard nine."
"Benedict . . ."
He took her hand and pulled her toward the door. "Seven sounds an awful lot like nine."
"Benedict . . ."
"Actually, it sounds even more like eleven."
"Benedict!"
He deposited her right by the door. "Sta ~ Julia Quinn

Maybe you can't relate to people that well now, but you will in time. You have to be present, though. You have to forget yourself and take in the layers of experience that are buzzing around you. The smart people around you will tolerate some awkwardness for the sake of knowing someone else who's smart and interesting. But if you don't know who you are and what you're all about, if you're ashamed and distracted by the nervous noise in your head, you won't be able to take part in the beauty of the world around you. ~ Heather Havrilesky

You know, my Katie, if I could be someone who could take care of you, fall in love with you, make you fall in love with me, you know I'd do it. It would keep us together. I don't want to lose you. But I can't seem to fall in love with anyone who is good for me. ~ Cindy Martinusen Coloma

The Delores tank rolled on inexorably, "You get a mortgage to buy a house, a larger mortgage than the previous owner because the price of the house has been artificially increased by the market, which is controlled by the banks. Then you live in the house for a few years paying a lot more in mortgage payments than you would if you were renting a similar property. But hey, you 'own' it and can 'do things to it'… things that cost even more money, by the way… so you maintain its upkeep, improve it with say a new kitchen or bathroom; the more salubrious the neighbourhood the more expensive the kitchen would need to be – a Küche & Cucina, say; impressing your cleaner is very important after all and at the end you sell it to someone else for more than you paid for it so they'll need an even bigger mortgage. And all the while everyone is paying all this money to the banks and the banks give the money to their shareholders, the biggest of whom are the incredibly rich. This, when you boil it all down, means that you're taking a large sum out of your wages and passing it across to some rich person to live large, whilst you and others like you struggle to make their monthly payments. Basically you've been screwed, Doc, but somehow they've convinced you that you own a bit of England, when the truth is you don't really own anything, you're just renting it at a higher cost and they can take it back from you any time they want. It's all just a card trick, Doc. All just 'smoke and mirror ~ Arun D. Ellis

Keep it on the down-low." "The what?" "It's a term I've learned from a human. It means keep it secret. It's no one's business and therefore they can't start any trouble if they disagree with the relationship. The male said he did that with an undesirable female." His face grew solemn. "He laughed when I commented that her looks should be irrelevant if she made him happy. I wasn't sure how to take that but I think he cares too much for appearances. The term is the same though. It means being with someone and no one knows." Justice stood. "I don't like that term. Anyone who would dismiss a person because of how they look isn't someone intelligent enough to learn from." "You going home?" Tiger glanced ~ Laurann Dohner

We think of forgiveness as a thing. An incident. A choice. But forgiveness is a process. A long, exhausting process. A series of choices that we have to make over, and over, and over again.

Because the anger at having been wronged... doesn't vanish because you say to someone, "I forgive you." Rather forgiveness is an obligation you take on not to act punitively on your anger. To interrogate it when it arises, and accept that you have made the choice to be constructive rather than destructive. Not that you have made the choice never to be angry again.

But anger can also make you sick, if you're exposed to it for too long.... The anger itself can be your reason for living, and feeding it can be your only goal.... ~ Elizabeth Bear

Not long after Chris died, a national magazine published a story comparing his life with that of the man accused of killing him. There are some parallels; they both grew up in Texas. But the article skimped on the differences. Look at the decisions they made, look at what they did with their lives, look at the responsibilities they took on--or shirked.
Chris saw a great deal of combat. He never made excuses for his behavior. He didn't always do the right thing, but he tried to do the right thing by others. Chris got the good grace, as Abel did, not by his birthright, but by his effort.
As I sat listening to the prosecutor, I thought his parallel extended through Chris's life--not solely to the man who shot him, but to the haters, to the people who ended up in legal disputes with him or his estate, for whatever reason. They all wanted something he had.
Not money, but authenticity. Real achievements. Soul.
Grace.
And of course that's the one thing you can't take from someone else, even if you steal his life.
Chris became famous without wanting to. Opportunities that others had to fight and claw for seemed to fall in his lap. But most of all, people just liked him for being who he was, with seemingly no effort on his part at all.
Of course, there was effort, and there was great struggle. He had to persevere--The Navy didn't want him at all when he first tried to enlist. But people don't see that part. They don't see the long days at BUD/S, or ~ Taya Kyle

The reason we are so controlled is not that we don't have the power to decide our own destiny, it is that we give that power away every minute of our lives. When something happens that we don't like, we look for someone else to blame. When there is a problem in the world, we say "What are they going to do about it". At which point they, who have secretly created the problem in the first place, respond to this demand by introducing a 'solution' - more centralisation of power and erosion of freedom. If you want to give more powers to the police, security agencies and military, and you want the public to demand you do it, then ensure there is more crime, violence and terrorism, and then it's a cinch to achieve your aims. Once the people are in fear of being burgled, mugged or bombed, they will demand that you take their freedom away to protect them from what they have been manipulated to fear. The Oklahoma bombing is a classic of this kind, as I detail in ..And The Truth Shall Set You Free. I call this technique problem-reaction-solution.

Create the problem, encourage the reaction "something must be done", and then offer the solution. It is summed up by the Freemason motto 'Ordo Ab Chao' -order out of chaos. Create the chaos and then offer the way to restore order. Your order. The masses are herded and directed by many and varios forms of emotional and mental control. It is the only way it coud be done. ~ David Icke

The world isn't fair. And no matter how good and decent you are, no matter how much you give to others, someone is always going to hate you for no other reason than the fact that you breathe. You can't help that. You can't change people or their minds once they've allowed them to get twisted by hatred. But you can change how you deal with them. Never back down, but walk away when you can, fight when you must. Whatever you do don't give them the power to hurt you. Don't let them inside you. They're not worth it. Live your life for yourself. Stay true to yourself and if they can't see the beauty that is you, it's their loss. Let the bitterness take them to their graves. Spend your time on what matters most. Being you and appreciating the people who see you for who and what you are. The people who love you, and the ones that you love. They are all that matter. Let the rest go to hell. - Drux Cruel ~ Sherrilyn Kenyon

Sometimes my mother did practice but one thing led to another and sometimes she did not. The advice of the homely man was something of a curse. She would not practice at all if she could not practice right so that gradually she played less and less and sometimes not at all.
I used to think that things might have been different. Gieseking never played a scale and Glenn Gould hardly practiced at all, they would just look at the score and think and think and think. If the homely man had said to go away and think this would have been every bit as revolutionary a concept for a Konigsberg. Perhaps he even thought that you had to think. But you can't show someone how to think in an hour; you can give someone an exercise to take away. ~ Helen DeWitt

I feel like someone ripped out my heart and smashed it with bricks. It hurts. I hurt. And I'd gladly take your hurt too if it meant that you'd be okay. I'd do anything for you. ~ J. Sterling

I'm not even sure I want kids, by the way, even if I'm not the one who has to be pregnant. It seems too risky. I mean, what if you end up with a kid that's just plain bad? Or stupid? It's not like you can give it away or put it in a garage sale or something. You're pretty much stuck with it for a long time.
I know now they have all these tests they can do so you can find out if your kid has three arms or is retarded or whatever, but you can't test for everything. You can't test for crazy, for example, or for bad taste in music and clothes and stuff. You can't know if your kid is going to be someone you would actually want to have hanging around. You just have to take your chances. That seems like a pretty big gamble to me. ~ Michael Thomas Ford

Further, any way of life based on the importation of resources is also functionally based on violence, because if your way of life requires the importation of resources, trade will never be sufficiently reliable: if people in the next watershed over won't trade you for some necessary resource, you will take it, because you need it. So, to bring this to the present, we could all become enlightened, and the US military would still have to be huge: how else will they get access to the oil they need to run the economy, oil that just happens to lie under someone else's land? The point is that no matter what we think of the irredeemability of this culture's mass psychology or system of rewards, this culture–civilization–is also irredeemable on a purely functional level. ~ Aric McBay

When we get hurt, our bodies immediately start trying to heal that hurt. This works for emotions as well. If we were scarred socially, by an incident of rejection or bullying, we immediately start trying to heal. Like pus comes out of wounds, emotions flow from psychological wounds.

And what do we really need at that moment? When we are out of that dangerous situation that scarred us, and we become triggered by some little thing - what do we need? Do we need someone to look at us and say, "Wow, you're really sensitive, aren't you?" or "Hey, man, I didn't mean it like that."? Do we need someone to justify their actions or tell us to take it easy, because the situation didn't really require such a reaction?

And, from ourselves, do we really need four pounds of judgment with liberal helpings of shame? Do we need to run away, to suppress, to hate our "over-sensitivity" to situations that seem innocuous to others?

No. We do not need all of these versions of rejection of a natural healing process. You would not feel shame over a wound doing what it must do to heal, nor would you shame another. So why do we do this to our heart wounds? Why do we do it to ourselves? To others?

Next time some harmless situation triggers you or someone around you into an intense emotion - realize it's an attempt at emotional healing. Realize the danger is no longer there, but don't suppress the healing of old dangers and old pains. Allow the pain. Don't react ~ Vironika Tugaleva

..:One can lose his job, his car, his house, his savings, his/her wife/husband and so for. And one can still manage to be able to start all over again. To overcome. But its dangerous and catastrophic when one loses his/her faith, hope and mind. When one enters into deep depression. For it could really destroy a person completely or it may take him/her twice as much work to get back up. This is why we are to constantly be renewing our minds. To keep putting oil to our fading lamps. Watering our drying lands. Repositioning ourselves now and then. And specially, helping each other out. It's not good for men to be alone. Two are better than one. For if one falls, the other will help him out. Before bad times come, prepare yourself. Equip yourself. Renew yourself so you could use the circumstances as wind beneath your wings and so you could see circumstances as what they are. Not what they may seem. Someone once said, "Circumstances and trials are just events." They are not people nor your final destination:.. ~ Rafael Garcia

Replace Negative Character Labels

Negative character labels are an even more serious problem than fixed mindsets. Examples of negative character labels include "I'm selfish," "I'm needy," "I'm unlovable," "I'm weak," "I'm defective," "I'm incompetent," and "I'm worthless." Such an uplifting list! Those negative beliefs sound quite dramatic when written down on the page, and sometimes people don't realize that they hold those beliefs about themselves. If your immediate reaction is to say, "Oh, I don't think any of those things about myself" or "Only someone who was super depressed would think those things," then take an extra second to make sure you're not even partially buying into these types of thoughts about yourself. It might be that you believe a negative character label only 20% of the time, but even that can still be an issue.
There are two types of negative character labels. Both can be changed. One type is very stable. For example, you believe you are incompetent, and you have never believed anything else, not even when you are in a positive mood. The other type is the type that goes up and down with your mood, anxiety, and stress. When your mood is low, you believe the negative character label much more strongly than when your mood is positive. If your negative character label changes due to transient things like your mood, anxiety, or stress, this can help you start to see that the belief is a product of these things rather than true. ~ Alice Boyes

How is he?"
"Who?"
"Your father."
Of all the things Claire had expected, that wasn't it, and it took her a minute of honest puzzlement to try to work out why someone like Frank Collins would even care.
She finally said,"He's doing okay. I talked to my mom yesterday; the doctors think they can fix his heart problem. He's feeling a lot better."
Frank nodded. "Good. Family's important," he said. "Maybe too important, sometimes. Iknow how much I screwed it up with Shane. Can't blame the kid for hating me now."
It was almost a . . . question? And if it was a question, what could Claire say?
Yeah, he hates your guts. That probably wasn't what Frank was hoping to hear.
"Just take care of him," she said. "That's what you're supposed to do. Stop using him, and start protecting him. I know he thinks he doesn't need it, but sometimes he does. Sometimes we all do."
Now Frank did look up, and Claire felt a blush building in her face as he stared at her like he was actually seeing her for a change.
"He did okay," Shane's dad finally said. "Picking you. ~ Rachel Caine