Barmaid Quotes

It should be possible to explain the laws of physics to a barmaid. ~ Albert Einstein

The woman behind the bar called out: 'Why do you stand like hypnotized fish? Did you come to drink beer or to eat food?'

'Be patient,' said Gersen. 'We are making our decision.'

The remark annoyed the woman. Her voice took on a coarse edge. "Be patient,' you say? All night I pour beer for crapulous men; isn't that patience enough? Come over here, backwards; I'll put this spigot somewhere amazing, at full gush, and then we'll discover who calls for patience! ~ Jack Vance

When I was a student, I had a part time job as a barmaid at a dodgy pub in Kent. ~ Jane Green

Sprang on your nerves with all the abruptness of a normal night's dream turning to nightmare. Dog into wolf, light into twilight, emptiness into waiting presence, here were your underage Marine barfing in the street, barmaid with a ship's propeller tattooed on each buttock, one potential berserk studying the best technique for jumping through a plate glass window (when to scream Geronimo? before or after the glass breaks?), a drunken deck ape crying back in the alley because last time the SP's caught him like this they put him in a strait jacket. ~ Anonymous

I'm a schizophrenic mix of wannabe glamourpuss and absolute slob, and my style is very much magistrate-meets-barmaid. ~ Jenny Eclair

Reality was a drunk buying a lottery ticket, cashing out to the tune of seventy million dollars, and splitting it with his favorite barmaid. A little girl emerging alive from a well in Texas where she'd been trapped for six days. A college boy falling from a fifth-floor in Cancun and only breaking his wrist. Reality was Ralph. ~ Stephen King

A good scientific theory should be explicable to a barmaid. ~ Ernest Rutherford

Matrices vary in flexibility from reflexes and more or less automatized routines which allow but a few strategic choices, to skills of almost unlimited variety; but all coherent thinking and behaviour is subject to some specifiable code of rules to which its character of coherence is due-even though the code functions partly or entirely on unconscious levels of the mind, as it generally does. A bar-pianist can perform in his sleep or while conversing with the barmaid; he has handed over control to the automatic pilot, as it were. ~ Arthur Koestler

So how to combine a liter of fluid with active agents, customized according to the patient's weight and status, while keeping everything sterile? If this is for the ER or the ICU, we have about ten minutes to make it happen. Fortunately for the patient, there is a sleep-starved teenager apprenticed to a chain-smoking barmaid in the basement who is ready for action. *** ~ Hope Jahren

Your soul: pure glucose edged with hints
Of tentative and half-soiled tints ~ Edith Sitwell

Conscience was the barmaid of the Victorian soul. Recognizing that human beings were fallible and that their failings, though regrettable, must be humored, conscience would permit, rather ungraciously perhaps, the indulgence of a number of carefully selected desires. ~ C.E.M. Joad

She's not your friend. She's a barmaid. ~ Sara Gruen

This was pretty exotic stuff for a telepathic barmaid from northern Louisiana. ~ Charlaine Harris

He never makes notes, he just remembers it all, like a barmaid. ~ K.J. Parker