Tedd Tripp Quotes

The finest art of communication is not learning how to express your thoughts. It is learning how to draw out the thoughts of another.

The only safe guide is the Bible. It is the revelation of a God who has infinite knowledge and can therefore give you absolute truth. God has given you a revelation that is robust and complete. It presents an accurate and comprehensive picture of children, parents, family life, values, training, nurture, and discipline - all you need to be equipped for the task of parenting.

Fights and quarrels don't come from lack of skill in conflict resolution. They don't come from people who are irritating. They come from desires that battle within. My desires are occupying the place of command and control inside my heart. Behavior Begins with the Heart

Correction is not displaying your anger at their offenses; it is rather reminding them that their sinful behavior offends God.

We give them material things and take delight in their delight in possessions. Then we hope that somewhere down the line they will see that a life worth living is found only in knowing and serving God.

Recognizing that God has called you to function as his agent defines your task as a parent. Our culture has reduced parenting to providing care. Parents often see the task in these narrow terms. The child must have food, clothes, a bed, and some quality time.
In sharp contrast to such a weak view, God has called you to a more profound task than being only a care-provider. You shepherd your child in God's behalf. The task God has given you is not one that can be conveniently scheduled. It is a pervasive task. Training and shepherding are going on whenever you are with your children. Whether waking, walking, talking or resting, you must be involved in helping your child to understand life, himself, and his needs from a biblical perspective (Deuteronomy 6:6-7).

How do you think of the Bible? Is it law, condemnation, warning, guilt, threats and judgment? Or is it God's merciful and gracious revelation for fallen, broken humanity?

Folly is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline will drive it far from him (Proverbs 22:15).

I have spoken to many parents who feared they were producing little hypocrites who were proud and self-righteous. Hypocrisy and self-righteousness is the result of giving children a keepable law and telling them to be good. To the extent they are successful, they become like the Pharisees ... The genius of Phariseeism was that it reduced the law to a keepable standard of externals that any self-disciplined person could do. In their pride and self-righteousness, they rejected Christ.

They don't have to agree with you on everything in order to respect you.

The law of God is not easy for natural man. Its standard is high and cannot be achieved apart from God's supernatural grace. God's law teaches us our need of grace. When you fail to hold out God's standard, you rob your children of the mercy of the gospel.

The parent is the child's guide. This shepherding process helps a child to understand himself and the world in which he lives. The parent shepherds a child to assess himself and his responses. He shepherds the child to understand not just the "what" of the child's actions, but also the "why." As the shepherd, you want to help your child understand himself as a creature made by and for God. You cannot show him these things merely by instruction; you must lead him on a path of discovery. You must shepherd his thoughts, helping him to learn discernment and wisdom.

God is concerned with the heart - the well-spring of life (Proverbs 4:23). Parents tend to focus on the externals of behavior rather than the internal overflow of the heart.

It is possible to be well-educated and still not understand life.

You should encourage your children to see the needs of those around them.

Moms and dads tell the children what to do. Kids tell their parents their wishes and dreams.

Whether you are watching a video or playing a game, whether you are doing work or fielding an unwanted phone call, whether you are being successful or smarting from failure - in the ordinary context of daily living, you show the power and viability of Christian faith.

Well, I've never been a morning person either. Perhaps that is true. But the question is this: Has that habit of personality been a blessing or a curse to you?

As a parent, you have authority because God calls you to be an authority in your child's life. You have the authority to act on behalf of God. As a father or mother, you do not exercise rule over your jurisdiction, but over God's. You act at his command. You discharge a duty that he has given. You may not try to shape the lives of your children as pleases you, but as pleases him. All you do in your task as parents must be done from this point of view. You must undertake all your instruction, your care and nurture, your correction and discipline, because God has called you to ... If you are God's agent in this task of providing essential training and instruction of the Lord, then you, too, are a person under authority. You and your child are in the same boat. You are both under God's authority. You have different roles, but the same Master.

Many parents lack a biblical view of discipline. They tend to think of discipline as revenge - getting even with the children for what they did. Hebrews 12 makes it clear that discipline is not punitive, but corrective. Hebrews 12 calls discipline a word of encouragement that addresses sons. It says discipline is a sign of God's identification with us as our Father. God disciplines us for our good that we might share in his holiness. It says that while discipline is not pleasant, but painful, it yields a harvest of righteousness and peace. Rather than being something to balance love, it is the deepest expression of love.

The person your child becomes is a product of two things. The first is his life experience. The second is how he interacts with that experience.

The man in the action-adventure movie who does whatever he wants and breaks all the rules is not a hero. He is a fool. Regardless of the apparent good that results in the end, he is a fool and the world he represents is a lie. It wouldn't be wise to make an evening's entertainment of watching powerful dramas that teach our children to think about life in ways that are not true.

The gospel enables you and your children to face the worst in yourselves - your sin, your badness, and your weakness - and still find hope, because grace is powerful.

To do good to oppressors, however, to pray for those who mistreat you, to entrust yourself to the just Judge, requires a child to come face-to-face with the poverty of his own spirit and his need of the transforming power of the gospel.

The central focus of parenting is the gospel. You need to direct not simply the behavior of your children, but the attitudes of their hearts.

Shaping ideas requires long-term interaction with long-range goals and 100 percent saturation.

Behavior is a manifestation of what is going on inside. What a person says or does mirrors the heart. "For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks" (Luke 6:45).

The parent can change his mind in the context of respectful appeal, but not in the presence of blatant rebellion.