Julie Halpern Famous Quotes
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Char bought a pack of clove cigarettes, claiming they tasted good, to which I ask why doesn't she just go suck on a clove so I don't have to inhale her perfumed second hand smoke?
I didn't have a boyfriend. I had someone to watch horror movies with while my best friend was too sick with cancer.
Her words were generically profound, like a Hallmark card I'd skim over to get to the check.
What if I have bad breath?' I asked.
'Chew on some gum,' she said.
'What if I can't find his tongue?'
'Back off on your tongue until you can feel his.'
'What if he throws up in my mouth?'
'Um, that would just be gross.
I did it. Who leaves a message like that? Who is so paranoid that they have to be so cryptic? If this wasn't day one of my Summer of Nothing, I might be in a hurry to figure this out. but first: breakfast.
Get Well Soon. People sent me get well soon cards while I was in a mental hospital. There were fluffy little bunnies, floaty rainbows, and even a religious card. I could understand that Hallmark probably doesn't make "Get Sane Soon" cards, but still. Was I not well before? Am I well now? Who decides?
When I die, I want them to bury me facedown and ass up so that the whole world can kiss my ass!
I can't buy the idea that we're supposed to live and learn from horrible things. That somehow these things happen so we can grow as people
It's amazing how something can be blue and yet absolutely colorless.
Raisins again. I like raisins, but I have a habit of losing one or two on the floor every time I eat them. I always find them later and think they are: a) a mouse turd or b) a cockroach. Then I figure out it's a raisin and sigh with relief. This pretty much happens every time I find a lost raisin.
I'm probably the only person on earth who had to be committed to a mental hospital to find a date.
Could it be possible that having cancer has turned you into an even bigger perv? Yes. It's a common side effect.
So I carried on, waiting for what ever was to come, with or without God's help
I have always kept a stack of library books next to my bed as a lifeline. If I ever woke in the middle of the night too scared to move or too sad to roll over, the books were my saviors.
Even sick as fuck and pumped with meds, Becca was a complete pervert.
