Best Colonoscopy Quotes

What are you giving him?"
She grins smugly. "Only the greatest gift a woman can give the man she loves."
I take my best guess. "Anal?"
Kate covers her eyes.
Dee-Dee's smile turns into a scowl. "No
pig. I'm giving him the gift of health. My acupuncturist cleared her schedule. She's going to work on Matthew the whole day."
I laugh. Because this explains so much.
"That's your gift? Really? It's the guy's birthday and you're gonna make him get needles stuck in his face all day? What are you gonna get him for Christmas - a colonoscopy? ~ Emma Chase

What percentage should you give? I tell people to start with 10 percent because the Bible writers have a lot to say about the tithe, which means, "tenth." For some people, that's extremely uncomfortable. But so is a colonoscopy, and those save countless lives. ~ Andy Stanley

If you get a colonoscopy, you should really insist they give you no drugs - then you do get to see what it's like to swim through your own intestines. ~ Mary Roach

People like you are the reason God doesn't talk to us anymore. So thanks for that."
"Geez, I was just joking around, Max," he said.
"Did I hurt your feelings?"
"A little bit, yes."
"Then you might want to get a colonoscopy for all that butthurt because I don't give a shit. ~ Barbie Bohrman

If one has a routine colonoscopy at the age of 50 and then colonoscopies thereafter as the physician recommends, you could largely prevent colon cancer, you could detect it in its very earliest stages and cure it. ~ Laurie Glimcher

He was looking forward to this about as much as one would look forward to a tooth extraction, or perhaps a vasectomy. A colonoscopy? He pondered a list of horrific things that could possibly be less painful than a week-long royal wedding. ~ Jessica Clare