Katelin LaMontagne Famous Quotes
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Time is precious and should be spent doing things that make you happy, not brushing those very moments aside. That's when you really die, and I plan on living.
Who the fuck calls their priest when their son is having a crisis?"
"I do, now shut up!" Ma answered.
Fucking morning people, they just don't understand what it a chore it is for us normal people to not want to leave our warm beds and face the miserable sun.
What's wrong with you?" John asks suspiciously. I give him a 'what chu talkin' 'bout Willis?' look and he explains. "You just woke up." I nod. "Walked into the kitchen." Once again I nod, not seeing what the big deal is. "And didn't rip apart the cabinets like a rabid squirrel looking like coffee." I shrug at that, I didn't even remember it. "What the fuck have you done with my best friend?
It's like before when there was a huge pile up on the highway, as soon as you got to the point in the traffic jam that you could see the accident, your eyes were glued to the window and you nearly rear ended the guy in front of you so that you can catch a peek at the victims. Sick fucks that we are, we like to witness the suffering of others and say, 'sucks to be them.' We bob our heads to the radio as we open up our engines and tear down the now cleared highway, continuing on with our lives as if we didn't just witness someone's spine being scraped off the ground. Come on, you know you've done it. Everyone has, and right now is one of those moments.
Sorry, I didn't know that you had a vagina, I'll refrain from using vulgar words for now on. How about it smells like pee pee and poo poo, with a little bit of spew, is that better?"
"You're a real character, you know that?"
"Thanks, I try," she says. "Now, let's get the shi-stuff and get out of here."
"Fine," I say. "But for future reference, I like it better when you curse. It's pretty funny to see a pissed off Tinkerbell." I run from the baseball mitt being hurled at my head, laughing all the way .
You were supposed to be my wingman, not my freaking kamikaze pilot.
I'll be your shovel.
You do know you're a woman, right?" I ask.
"Are you sure?" Olivia asks with an astonished face. "I thought I had a penis.
My god, I sound like a chick. I must be suffering the debilitating condition called DIC, Dick In Charge, since obviously he's running the show right now.
