Jonas Jonasson Quotes

Humanity, in general, is a potpourri of many traits. For example: stinginess, self-involvedness, jealousy, ignorance, stupidity, and fearfulness. But also: kindness, cleverness, friendliness, forgiveness, considerateness -- and generosity. Not all of these traits find room in every soul.

In the end, they could think of no better solution than to put a bullet between his eyes, so they could go about their task in peace.

Politics sometimes is not only unnecessary but also unnecessary complicated.

The world went on revolving around its sun at the constant speed and with the inconstant temper it always had.

With the new antiterrorism laws, the government could call anyone a terrorist and lock him or her up for as long as they liked, for any reason they liked. Or for no reason at all.

Politics was often not only unnecessary, but sometimes also unnecessarily complicated.

The hundred-year-old man had never let himself be irritated by people, even when there was a good reason to be, and he was not annoyed by the uncouth manner of this youth.

T was so ridiculous that it had to be true - he could hardly hae made it up.

Allan Emmanuelle Karlsson closed his eyes and felt perfectly convinced that he would now pass away for ever. It had been exciting, the entire journey, but nothing lasts for ever, except possibly general stupidity.

Allan admitted that the difference between madness and genius was subtle, and that he couldn't with certainty say which it was in this case, but that he had his suspicions.

Allan didn't even know if the Prime Minister was Left or Right. He must certainly be one of them, because if there was one thing life had taugh Allan, it was that people insisted on being one or the other.

First, it was some students who were for free sex and against the Vietnam War. As far as that went, this was OK with the president because students will always find something to complain about. But

You should beware of priests, my son. And people who don't drink vodka. Worst of all are priests who don't drink vodka.

Those who only says what is the truth, they're not worth listening to.

It sure was an unjust world when certain people received an excess of certain things, while others got nothing.

And not only that, Mr Stalin. I have been in China for the purpose of making war against Mao Tse-tung, before I went to Iran and prevented an attempt to assassinate Churchill.'
'Churchill? That fat pig!' Stalin shouted.
Stalin recovered for a moment before downing a whole glass of vodka. Allan watched enviously. He too would like to have his glass filled, but didn't think it was the right moment for such a request.

Hi Allan, it's Harry'
'Which Harry?'
'Truman, Allan. Harry S. Truman, the president, damn it!'
'How nice! That was a good meal we had Mr President, thank you. I hope you weren't required to fly the plane home?

But God answered with silence. He did that sometimes, and Father Ferguson always interpreted it to mean that he should think for himself. Admittedly, it didn't always work out well when the pastor thought for himself, but you couldn't just give up.

You'll see that things will turn out like they do, because that is what usually happens - almost always, in fact

Revenge is like politics, one thing always leads to another until bad has become worse, and worse has become worst.

Imagine that, death was just like being asleep. Would he have time to think before it was all over? And would he have time to think that he had thought it? But wait, how much do you have to think before you have finished thinking?

Allan thought it sounded unnecessary for the people in the seventeenth century to kill each other. If they had only been a little patient they would all have died in the end anyway. Julius said that you could say the same of all epochs

I shall destroy capitalism! Do you hear! I shall destroy every single capitalist! And I shall start with you, you dog, if you don't help us with the bomb!'
Allan noted that the had managed to be both a rat and a dog in the course of a minute or so. And that Stalin was being rather inconsistent, because now he wanted to use Allan's services after all.
But Allan wasn't going to sit there and listen to this abuse any longer. He had come to Moscow to help them out, not to be shouted at. Stalin would have to manage on his own.
'I've been thinking,' said Allan.
'What,' said Stalin angrily.
'Why don't you shave off that moustache?'
With that the dinner was over, because the interpreter fainted.

Is my life, by any chance, about to take a new turn?

Her mother took the bottle with a "thank you, dear girl," unscrewed the lid, and began to dull the never-ending pain that came with the inability to give oneself or one's child a future.

Above all, Suharto had been hunting down communists, presumed communists, suspected communists, possible communists, highly unlikely communists, and the odd innocent person.

And there Allan could see an opening. In a prison camp you couldn't just hang around, because if you did then the guards would shoot you.
Herbert liked the idea, but it gave him the creeps at the same time. A load of bullets, wouldn't that be dreadfully painful?

There are only two things I can do better than most people. One of them is to make vodka from goats' milk, and the other is to put together an atom bomb.

If you don't think you have enough problems, you should acquire a mammal in Sweden just hours before you're about to fly home to the other side of the world, and then insist that the animal must come along in your luggage.

The very biggest and apparently most impossible conflicts on earth were based on the dialogue: 'You are stupid, no, it's you who are stupid.' The solution, said Allan, was often t down a bottle of vodka together and then look ahed.

The priest and the receptionist joyfully and contentedly shared their genuine dislike of the world, including the entirety of the Earth's population. The burden was now only half as great, since each of them could take on three and a half billion people rather than seven billion alone.

Benny gave her an admiring look. He had never heard a woman swear so much in such a short time. He thought it sounded delightful.

Only the prisoners who were hit. An undamaged

Julius didn't want to use the freezer unnecessarily because it used a hell of a lot of electricity. Julius had of course hot-wired it, and it was Gösta at Forest Cottage farm who unknowingly paid, but it was important to steal electricity in moderation if you wanted to keep taking advantage of the perk for a long time.

Nombeko said that she was South African, and that she thought it sounded laborious to hate all Americans, given how many of them there were.

Dr. Eklund was utterly dumbfounded. Did the prime minister think that a waiter who had dropped out of school before he was ten years old could be put to use to build atom bombs for Sweden?

When life has gone into overtime it's easy to take liberties,

People could behave how they liked, but Allan considered that in general it was quite unnecessary to be grumpy if you had the chance not to.

Never try to out-drink a Swede, unless you happen to be a Finn or at least a Russian.

Allan said that they would all turn up soon. And then he ended with some encouraging words about how he thought that there wasn't a single person in the world who had gone so far with such a limited intelligence as Amanda had done. And Amanda thought that was so beautifully said, that tears came to her eyes.

He told himself that he could die some other time, in some other place.

It was tough to think in new ways and equally tough to remember the old.

Allan woke up and wondered whether it wouldn't soon be time to go to bed.