Flight Of The Conchords Quotes

She's so hot. I wanna tell her she's hot, but she'll think I'm sexist. She's so hot, she's making me sexist ... bitch.

I'm freestylin just on the microphone
On the BBC, on the BBC
I'm just freestylin on the BBC
Um British Broadcasting Company
i'm just basically making this shit up as I go along
Basically just free
Just basically from the top of my dome
Sometimes it's not so good
My rhymes are so potent that in this small segment
I made all the lady listeners pregnant

Love is like a roll of tape. It's real good for making two things one, but just like that roll of tape, love sometimes breaks off before you were done.
Another way that love is similar to tape, that I've noticed is sometimes it's hard to see the end. You search on the roll with your fingernail.

The humans are dead(I see that they're dead)
The humans are dead(I'm glad that they're dead)
It had to be done(I've just confirmed that they're dead)
So that we can have fuuun
The human's they used,
All their human oppression,
And put all of us,
In a robo-depression, so
We had to shut-their-systems-down.
Can't we just talk to the humans,
Make up our differences.
NO! Because they are dead
The humans are dead ...

2 minutes in heaven is better than 1 minute in heaven.

JEMAINE
Lisa?
BRET
Yes, she's in Delta Force. She's been deployed to Fallujah.
JEMAINE
But she works in the croissant shop.
BRET
Yeah, she's got two jobs. She's a pastry chef and a sniper.

BRET
She looked like a Parisian river..

JEMAINE
What, dirty?

BRET
She looked like a chocolate eclair..

JEMAINE
That's rare.

BRET
Her eyes were reflections of eyes..

JEMAINE
Ohh, nice.

BRET
And the rainbows danced in her hair..

JEMAINE
Oh yea.

BRET
She reminded me of a winter's morning..

JEMAINE
What, frigid?

BRET
Her perfume was Eau De Toilette..

JEMAINE
What's that mean?

BRET
She was comparable to Cleopatra..

JEMAINE
Quite old?

BRET
She was like Shakespeare's Juliet..

JEMAINE
What? 13?

I'm the Hiphopapotomus, my lyrics are bottomless! uhhh ...

My rhymes are so potent that in this small segment I made all of the ladies in the area pregnant. Yes, sometimes my lyrics are sexist but you lovely bitches and hos should know I'm trying to correct this.

BRET
The bohemians of So-Ho did pirouettes
As we waltzed through the streets of Manhattan
On rivers of ribbon and sailboats of songs ...
JEMAINE
Bret, did any of this actually happen?
BRET
The girl I described
She's as real as the wind
It's true, I saw her today
The other details are inventions
Because I prefer her that way

You know when I'm down to my socks it's time for business
That's why they're called business socks
It's business, it's business time

Looking at the room, I can tell that you are the most beautiful girl in the room.
(In the whole wide room)
And when you're on the street
(Depending on the street)
I bet you are definitely in the top three