Elliott James Quotes

life doesn't have any respect for dramatic pauses.

You know you're in a college town when there's a restaurant called "Pancakea." The establishment was a pancake/coffee house, and Choo, Molly, Sig, and I were sitting in a booth arguing about the place and its name and their relative merits. I thought the name was a take on panacea, implying that pancakes are a cure for everything. Sig thought the owner wanted the place to become the IKEA of pancakes. Molly thought that given how large the pancakes were, the title might be a riff on Pangea, the first continental landmass. We all agreed that the owner was probably an ex-college student who couldn't get a job with his or her major, but we couldn't agree on whether that major was philosophy, marketing, anthropology, or just heavy drinking.

I tried to get back at her by adopting some seductive poses of my own to torment her with, but that just made her laugh hysterically, which sort of defeated the purpose. But

Wait," I said while Sig was throwing my belt across the room. My shirt was on top of an end table and she was stepping out of her pants while my foot held them pressed against the floor. "What?" She gasped. "I'm withholding sex to get back at you for that shower," I explained. "The hell," she said. It wasn't a question so much as a warning. "Hold on," I said. She stared at me. "Okay, I'm finished." I grabbed her and pulled her over onto the bed.

it's an attitude that mostly comes from immaturity, low self-esteem, and feelings of social powerlessness, and adolescence is a petri dish for those kinds of breeding conditions. I

My girlfriend was agreeing not to remove anyone's vital organs with a salad fork for my sake. It was a sweet moment. Too

Most people never question the core beliefs they grow up with," Emil confirmed. "You can look back on any culture five hundred years later and wonder how they could have ever believed some of the contradictory or flat-out insane things they accepted as law or common sense.

I've got this thing I do when my mind starts to spiral before a fight. I unfold my fingers and concentrate on them one by one until my feelings narrow into focused calm. I associate each finger with a specific phrase, and if I have time, I recite them to myself like mantras.

I called you because I wanted to hear your voice," I said. "You're learning," Sig observed. "You didn't miss a beat there." "Buy toothpaste." "What?" Sig asked. "Oops, sorry," I said. "I read off the wrong note card." She

Ever since I started hanging around you, it's more like 'Oh, look, something messed up is going on. Let's poke it And see what happens. Wow, it's even bigger and more messed-up than it looked like. Let's poke it again. Oh my God, where did those giant flaming woodchucks come from?

OK, but you maybe saved my life, and you've seen me naked," I said. "In some countries we just got married. Can i at least know what name you go by?

Coffee is one of the few constants in my life," I explained. "No matter where I go, no matter how crappy a day I'm having, no matter what kind of mood I'm in, coffee is always there to make me feel a little better.

I was sad but it felt like the sadness was pouring out of me instead of poisoning me. I felt like I had been sleeping in the dark, not knowing I was in a coffin until someone pried the lid off. It hurt, but it was good, the way love is supposed to be.

For a certain type of person, running toward the things that scare them is the only thing that gives them any sense of control.

You're kind of acting like a dick," I tried. "What are you doing?" Simon demanded. "Oh, I'm sorry. I thought we were playing some weird game where we made completely obvious statements," I explained.

Pinky: I've been in this kind of situation before. Fourth finger: I've felt these feelings before. Middle finger: I've survived them every time. Index finger: Everybody dies eventually. Thumb: That includes my enemies.

TEN THINGS THAT PEOPLE WHO DIDN'T READ THE FIRST BOOK REALLY OUGHT TO KNOW.

I. One day, your father and mother were hugging, and they began to have special feelings. Warm feelings that tingled in their private places. It is likely they weren't wearing any clothes. At any rate, they began to rub against each other like two sticks trying to start a fire, and nine months later, you were born. If this is news to you, please put this book down now. There may well be big bad wolves and evil witches and fairies in the pages that follow, but I promise you, this isn't a children's story.

I found my destination a few miles outside Swelling: a lone, squat, brown bar called The Inn of the Line...The place looked like a dive. Maybe even a plunge. Hell, it was a drowning accident.

Sometimes, the universe just does what the universe wants to do, and screw you if you can't take a joke. I

That's the problem with arguing with Sig. We start at point A and then go straight to step thirteen and wind up in phase orange and then, you know, we're in the linen aisle looking for windshield wipers. I

You're really going to leave me like this?" "You have hands." She plunged her head back into the shower jet. "I was raised Catholic," I protested. "I only do that alone and with feelings of intense shame, the way God intended.

Molly reached over and patted my shoulder. "It's OK, sweetie. I'm a lesbian." "That's it. I definitely want myself a new priest," Choo said. "Episcopalians will let anybody in," Molly agreed. "It's all the drinking that goes on at our conferences. Half the time when our bishops are raising their hands to vote, they think they're ordering another scotch.

What?" I said. "It's the smart play." "That's what," she responded. "This is usually the part where you explain how it's strategically necessary for you to go in there alone and naked with nothing but a pair of fingernail clippers." "I don't have to try to impress you anymore," I explained. "We're already having sex.

I wanted to live, and the knowledge filled me with a fierce and exultant joy until I felt like flame in a world made of paper. I wanted to live.

I'm a mean mother-hmmnhmmnh man of God," she informed me. "Except that I'm a woman, of course."
"You just quoted something, didn't you?" I asked.
"Yes, I did," Molly agreed. She seemed calm but her heart was beating fat. "From Dusk Till Dawn. Its a vampire movie with George Clooney."
"Is it too late to get a different priest?" Choo wondered. "Like maybe one who quotes The Bible?

Sig is like that. She tends to have an "it takes a village" attitude toward monster hunting. I have mostly hunted supernatural predators alone, partly because I had no choice and partly because I'm an idiot.

If he wore any expression at all, it was a look that said, "Take your damned photo and hurry up about it before I have my manservant kill you." It

Sig idly stuck her index finger in her cup of steaming-hot coffee and stirred it. I couldn't decide it it was mildly erotic or mildly disgusting.

A nix who kept changing her appearance was selling something she called moonshine

Mike's harmless." "No," Sig corrected. "He's powerless. There's a difference.

Watching you try to be a smooth manipulator is like watching a moose do ballet. What did you do, read Machiavelli for Dummies? Or

I considered pushing Chai a little more just to see what would happen. There were all sorts of ways to play with the idea of a werewolf therapist being James Bond. Live and Let Cry. No wait, would Live and Let It All Out be better? Live and Let Chai? Full Moonraker. The Spy Who Emotionally Displaced Needs onto Me. Dr. Noooooarrrhgggh!

I disbelieved what he was saying so hard that I probably created an alternate universe where it wasn't true.

If my memory serves, teenagers always know more than adults think they do, and the same teenagers always understand what they know a little less than they think they do. All that intensity and lack of experience and attempts to compensate with cynicism make it hard to sort out nuances. "Yeah,

I will say that as far as I know, only in English are the words "self" and "conscious" put together to mean something bad. My