Carol Plum-Ucci Quotes

The line between complete joy and complete terror is often thin.

If a life goes down the toilet, it comes out in a river and meets the sea.

Problem with the big philosophers is they cared about ideas more than people. Hegel would probably have stepped over a guy trying to slit his wrists outside a bar - to get to all the people he could sit and bullshit with inside. Did you know half of philosophy was first put into words by people shot in the ass?

A person could explode if he had to think too much.

People create their own little hells. They don't need my help

Things don't have to be sane when they're normal.

Of all those books you've read? There's got to be something, somewhere in them, to help us laugh at a situation like this.

World is all backward… It's like…we're through the looking glass. Good is bad, bad is good. Black is white, white is black. People base their lives on convenient recollections and are considered sane. People who look too hard for truth are considered crazy.

There are times in life to grow, and there are times in life to shine. One can't grow and shine at the same time; it just doesn't work that way. Now you're growing. Tomorrow you'll shine.

Love covers a myriad of plausibility structures.

Life is all we have, and if we can't look at it honestly, are we really living?

It's fine to be insane as long as you keep it to yourself.

Love and truth have no correlation.

There is something very cool about writing your worst memories through someone else's eyes. You start to see what happened to you ... almost as if it happened to somebody else. Especially if that made-up person is nice, it's a great exercise because there are many mean people in this world.

When you go into a room, you knock first. If you start asking people questions and they start tilting back in their chairs, it means they don't want to talk about it. It means if you look at something on their computer screens, they're likely to knock your brains out with a baseball bat.

No friend of my parents is a pervert. It's physiologically impossible.

There you go: Someone who puts «positive thinking» and «shit» in the same concept can inspire some serious eye-rolling if you're the type who works at keeping your thought-life healthy.

Sometimes the things you search far and wide for are right under your nose.

«People used to say I was weird,» he said. «I used to care. But I don't anymore. People shouldn't care, people shouldn't use words like weird once you hit junior year. Everyone's weird. That's the way I look at it.»

I only wish to be gone. Therefore, I AM.

You're making it sound like it's more dangerous to have a slightly weird family, than a totally weird family.

My mom always said that people admire you for your strengths, but they love you for your faults. They love you for all your imperfections, which make them more comfortable with their own imperfect lives.

Why is it that everyone loves to see the rich person get flushed down the toilet? Why is it people will spend four dollars to buy a magazine just so they can read about some Hollywood star's divorce? Or arrest? Or bad luck? I have no idea what Hollywood crimes have actually been told truthfully, but at least I have the brains to say I don't know.

I think desire is the most powerful force in the universe.

Life is a journey, and I may not have always lived up to my ability, but I have always lived purposefully, and I guess readers get caught up with me, raising the questions, looking for the answers, looking to be a little more understanding, a little less judgmental, a little more merciful. I hope so.

Everyone who doesn't want to believe in supernormal powers says the people who experience them are psycho. What the hell kind of a world is this if all magic moments are psychotic?

You're supposed to be kind to everyone, because you never know when you're meeting an angel.

Some doctors say a person who has only had same-sex attractions is, like, a zero. A person who has only had opposite-sex attractions is, like, a ten. He says most people fall between one and nine.

Complete happiness can look so much like complete terror that its hard to tell them apart.

I found myself in a place that was thorny, but because I was so used to being there, it bore out certain twisted sensations of comfort. It's a place called «alone».

Life is excellent or life blows, depending on how you look at it.

My belief in ghosts swings with the wind. But my belief that the cemetery felt happy and not sad - I've never changed my mind about that.