Vadim Krasnorada Quotes

He cried, you understand? Damned Mad Dog cried. Drunk, for what? For you. For fucking you! "

"He cried? We all do. Enough vodka, and we cry. ~ Aleksandr Voinov

His customary tactics relied on piling up a heap of accidents until they grew into a clear inevitability – or at least into the likeness of one. Inevitability was something you couldn't argue with – this was the secret of success. ~ Vadim Babenko

[Roger] Vadim became famous worldwide as a director, and I as an actress, but the other side of the coin was terrible. My life was totally turned upside down. I was followed, spied upon, adored, insulted. My private life became public. ~ Brigitte Bardot

The objective observer always has the advantage over a direct participant. ~ Vadim Zeland

Vadim sat up, unfairly pulling the towel over his groin so she missed the main attraction. Had he changed in the intervening years? If anything, he had to have grown bigger, which was terrifying, because the boy had rocked a manaconda at nineteen. Dicks didn't shrink with time, did they?
Note to self: Google penis size changes with age. For science. ~ Kate Meader

You broke me up there in the mountains. You cracked something in my head, I don't know. I have never been obsessed with another person before or after. You just drilled your way in and since then, I've been yours. You got to a place that I didn't know existed ... and all that has changed me, taken the stuff away I thought was true about me. In some weird, weird way, started something that turned me into more than a goodlooking bastard. ~ Aleksandr Voinov

if you ever find yourself in a situation where you know the usual course of events, do something surprising – no matter what – something that does not fit into the standard development of events. The pendulum will be extinguished. The thing is, as long as you are acting according to a given scenario, you accept the pendulum's game and give away your energy on that frequency. ~ Vadim Zeland

Take me on R&R, aye? Back to where we were before, or a similar place. Sea, sky, sun, and sex 24/7. Deal?' ... 'Make that 12/7 - getting old. ~ Aleksandr Voinov

Vadim swallowed, felt his throat too tight to move, then, still staring at the bottle, smelling the desert and Dan, and himself, his hand reached to his side, opened the holster of the pistol. Took out the mag, took the bullet from the chamber, clicked the mag in place again, rolled the bullet between his fingers.
He looked at Dan, sideways, saw the man stare at him, all eyes, dark eyes, and the way the pale desert moon made his face a place of shadows.
He reached for Dan's hand, opened the fingers and placed the bullet into the palm.
"This is the bullet you'll use to kill me if I walk away again." Because if I walk away again, I'll be in so much pain I'm better off dead anyway. ~ Aleksandr Voinov

I'll be in position. Vadim left the building, struggling with the emotion, fuck, Dan kissing him like that hat shaken him, deeply. He'd needed that touch, that oath, that everything, but coudln't have responded any other way. Not in Russian, not in English. Couldn't have just held on to him for a moment longer. He wanted to hold him, fuck him, be fucked, he wanted to rest at Dan's shoulder after sex and think nothing but that they were both alive. Fuck the war, fuck the past, fuck the money. ~ Aleksandr Voinov

Have you ever wondered whether there could be a different, more positive script in which the one who feels well survives? ~ Vadim Zeland

You really do love him, don't you?" she said quietly.
Vadim blinked, then looked to the side, without seeing colours and patterns, but it helped him find words. Speaking about love without cliché, without borrowing somebody else's well-worn words that were too comfortable. "Dan changed me in ways that stripped away the man I wanted to be, and the man I was made to be, and the man I was expected to be. He skinned me alive, and left only…..somebody who…." He breathed but barely. "…can live and die now, like a human being, not an automation, not somebody else's creation. Dan took my fear of death. I can't die now. I know I'm immortal."

"Immortal?" she said quietly, sitting still. "Your soul? Your being?"

"I don't believe there's anything like a soul. But I believe most people are asleep. They aren't even aware what they are, or that they are alive. And we are all scared to die, so when it happens we scream for our mothers and clutch our guts because we're scared. I'm not. I'm not afraid of death. The only thing I'm afraid of is losing Dan." But if that happens, he thought, Dan might just keep the promise and kill him on the way out. ~ Aleksandr Voinov

The concept of harmony being preserved by the universe itself was obviously to his taste: he was getting old and was afraid of death. ~ Vadim Babenko

Pretty is different,' he murmured. 'Pretty has no scars. You are ... ' jaw muscles tensed again. 'Like the morning sky in Afghanistan. Not 'pretty'. Word's 'breathtaking'. ~ Aleksandr Voinov

There was simply no alternative to Dan, and the thought of that breaking or fading made him sick to his stomach.
"You're all I have, Dan. Every bit." (Vadim) ~ Aleksandr Voinov

I thought I was better than you." He felt too much, was tearing himself open with all this, but nine years deserved all his pain. "How wrong was I." Vadim reached behind him to touch Dan's neck.
"I wanted you even then. And I was ... curious. I tried to ... get into your mind, and instead let you in. Not good, and yet best thing I've done in this whole war."
"Best thing I've done in all my life". ~ Aleksandr Voinov

I love you, don't you fucking see that?"
Dan was desperate, grabbing hold of the second wrist, shaking Vadim. "But how can I do that if you can't love me? If you need me instead of love me? If you fall in love with someone else, while expecting me to keep you together? How the fuck is that going to work? It fucking hurts, you understand? And I don't know what the fuck to do about it, because I can't just switch off and stop loving you. It doesn't work like that. It'll never happen, you get me? I tried that shit, several times already, but there's no fucking way I'll ever not love you and that fucking hurts like fucking shit when you're someone I don't recognise anymore! ~ Aleksandr Voinov

Vadim inhaled, but couldn't form words, struggled with translating soldier concepts into something civilians could understand.

Dan moved into the breach. "Violence, Duncan. I'm afraid we didn't meet under a full moon with roses and a bottle of wine. We were set on killing each other. Just … that it didn't work out like that. ~ Marquesate

Knowing what Dan's face had looked like in Kabul, the night they'd spent in the hotel room. What he'd said. My light, my life, my sanity, my love. Nothing of that had been wrong. Not the sex, the kisses, the teenager oaths of staying together, always, rain, shine, life, death. I'd die for you. Live for me. Hold me. Fucking hold me. ~ Aleksandr Voinov

Russkie, promise me a simple thing?" Out of the blue when they had finished, after a mouthful from the mug. Dan seemed relaxed, leaning on his side. Resting back, savoring the taste, Vadim turned his head to look at Dan. Oh, that body. The effect it had on him, all the time, even when Dan wasn't there. Twelve months. "Promise what?"
Sometimes, that kind of thing was about letters. Tell my girl I love her. Tell my mother I didn't suffer. Almost painful. Letters. Words that would hurt worse than the killing bullet.
"Simple." Dan nodded, "if I'm unlucky, and if you find my body, will you bury it? Some rocks would do, I can't stand the thought of carrion's. As if that mattered, eh? I'd be fucking dead." Dan shrugged, tossed a grin towards the other, made light of an entirely far too heavy situation. He took the bottle once more, washing down the taste of death and decay, chasing away unbidden images.
Vadim felt a shudder race over his skin. The thought of death chilled him to the bone, like a premonition. For a moment he saw himself stagger through enemy territory, looking for something that had been Dan. Minefields, snipers, fucking Hind hellfire. He might be able to track him. He might be able to guess where he had gone, where he had fallen. He had found the occasional pilot. But he had had help. Finding a dead man in a country full of dead people was more of a challenge.
"I'll send you home," he murmured. Stay alive, he thought. Stay alive like you are now. ~ Marquesate

Emotions stem from attitudes, therefore you should change your attitude in the first place. Feelings and emotions are nothing but consequences. They are caused by one single thing, importance. ~ Vadim Zeland

His list of complaints to the world all of a sudden became way too long. ~ Vadim Babenko

Why do people kill others just like them with such ferocity simply because they worship a different god? What harm were they doing? People suffer in these wars and dozens, hundreds, thousands, millions even lose their lives. Whatever happened to the survival instinct? One could just about understand the violent battle for wealth or territory but how are we supposed to understand the battle for a belief? ~ Vadim Zeland

Unless you accept the possibility of defeat you will not eliminate desire. ~ Vadim Zeland

I have waited my entire life to love you and I refuse to let your stubbornness take you away from me. ~ Kate Meader

When you battle for something it is like you are trying to push your realization into the alternatives space, whereas when you choose something the space comes to you. ~ Vadim Zeland

No time for books, no patience. What good would they do? They don't tell you how to survive."
"No, they don't do that. They are reason, not tool." Vadim smirked. "They hold more truth than Pravda. Politburo can't lie in Pushkin. Pushkin was there before we became Soviets. It means ... if we have past, we have future." ( ... ) "At least I know that there are many truths. It's about learning to think different thoughts. Know things that you never felt. You could know what being rich feels like, or being in love, without ever getting real feeling. ~ Aleksandr Voinov

But this time it was not pain that filled the empty shell, but feelings, flooding back, bringing knowledge and realisation. Here, and now, and his once more. Vadim. Forever and always. Vadim. His.
And Dan cried, helplessly, while his good hand clawed at the other's body, his body pressed so close, as if he was trying to crawl inside. ~ Marquesate & Vashtan

Reality moves unnoticeably in the alternatives space like the minute hand on a watch, but that does not mean it is not moving! That ~ Vadim Zeland

Right now he was nothing but a physically hurt man who had been through hell and back, clinging to his promise. "We be ... together. More than just ... few ... hours. Wanna die ... with you. Not ... alone." Fought to stay awake, needed to spend every second with Vadim while he could.
Vadim kissed that hand again, looked up. "We won't die. We'll never die. I promise. He'd promise anything, meant it, would die defending this man, would live and die and suffer for him. ~ Aleksandr Voinov

Because of you Vadim, You are my home. ~ Marquesate

Vadim moved to touch his lips to Dan's, tilting his head with his hand, urging him to open up and pressed in harder, needed that feeling now, that want and need. The fact there was the desire that had been the basis of everything, much before any feelings or thoughts had become important, complicating it all. ~ Aleksandr Voinov

So that's what I am about? Keeping you together?" Dan turned to face Vadim, and he was pale under the tan. "Keeping you alive? What the fuck happened to the touches in the cave, to the vows and the cutting, to the one fucking big thing that isn't about need and doing but about being? What the fuck happened to the love?" He shook his head, agitated, and damn, this was painful all of sudden. "I don't want to be needed. I want to be loved, for fuck's sake. ~ Aleksandr Voinov

Orderliness needs to be mixed with a dose of reasonable disorder. ~ Vadim Zeland