S.A. McAuley Quotes

I couldn't fight the urge to close my eyes, to match my breathing to his. And I was flooded with a feeling that couldn't be serenity. Because Peacemakers were never meant to know real peace.

Your lingering presence erodes me. Heartbeat by heartbeat. Cell by aging cell. Washing away any sense of self I ever had. Intruding into a nothingness I've struggled to find the pieces to fill. A jar filled with stones, piled with pebbles, topped with sand, only to be left with the knowledge that water, with enough time and persistence, has the power to wash it all away.
Your name is on my lips. Frozen. A familiar cadence of syllables that once soothed me.
A name I can't speak. Can't think of.
Not on this shore, at our lake. Not on this day. When only a year ago, with a foreshadowing that is now ice in my veins, you stood next to me, in this jacket, your hand in mine, so warm, and stared out at this expanse and whispered in awe, This is what a cold lake looks like.

He was the one thing in my life that was still my choice. And I chose him above the Revolution.

Armise and I had met through the scope of our rifles and sometimes I wondered if that was also where we'd end.

Fuck my country and yours, they will continue fighting whether we live or die. But I can't, and won't, go on without you. Not anymore.

Drink up. I get more enjoyable the higher your blood alcohol content gets.