Daniel Abbott Quotes

Cesar knew better. He did. And love. Love just makes a man weak. A woman, a child - doesn't matter what face the love has, love makes you stupid, it takes you out of your character, twists you, folds you, it drags you out into deep waters and drowns you. Love has you thinking about all the things you buried. All the things you left behind. It has you thinking about your mother, who was a nurse once, wearing scrubs and coming home late, before all the fighting, before the vodka, before the heroin, before Cesar found her in the bathtub sleeping in her own blood.
Love has you crying on the couch while you're feeding your baby. Not even a month old and you're leaving him. Not because you want to, but because of love. Because you love him and you know he's better off with somebody else. Because it's the right thing to do. But righteousness doesn't take the edge of the sting. Because it hurts. Because he's looking up at you. His eyes wide in awe like you're God herself. Your son cannot understand a word that you're saying.

He doesn't understand that you're saying goodbye.

The city yawns and stretches. A lazy Sunday morning opens its eyes. Cesar's always loved it down here. The water flowing beneath him. The city surrounding the ancient river. A bright green canopy of trees far off in the distance. Cesar's always appreciated the beauty. He's always thought it was a perfect juxtaposition of urban and God.

The delivery room is cold and it has a view of the city. A view of smokestacks and snow-kissed rooftops. An industrial grid of squares that seem to go on for miles. And the snowflakes have wings. Big white butterflies suspended in air. The kind kids like to catch on their tongues.

The little girl who loved her father more than anything in the world is gone. Who survived has survived wolves.

She hasn't aged a day, besides the sadness in her eyes.

It's like she's floating inside of herself, in the dark, and whatever hasn't already emptied inside her is emptying now...