Chloe Caldwell Quotes

I feel New York inside me when I talk too loudly, when I'm in line for coffee and feel rageful and restless, when I ask inappropriate and personal questions of strangers. When I say, 'Oh, I walked,' and people look at me quizzically and say, 'That's a long walk.

And do you agree that the mornings when we appreciated each other might have been better than the mornings we loved each other?

Things hurt worse before they hurt better.

My mother wanted to be Betty Boop. Betty Boop was independent. Betty Boop was sexy. Betty Boop really had her shit together, you know?

Besides some aches in our bones, and the tear in my coat, we are fine. We all keep going.

In hindsight, I see it was my decision not to let go. I didn't know how, though some days I focused completely on it: using therapy, distraction, exercise. Other days I left myself wildly grieve. Finn affects it all: every conversation I have, what I choose to wear, what books I read, what films and shows I watch. There's that Buddhist quote, (S)he who angers you owns you. She owned me. I allowed it. She controlled me. I knew this feeling of misery would pass, that what I needed was time, but I was impatient. Unfortunately, we must live through the present to get to the future, writes Hanif Kureishi in his novel Intimacy.

You've always called me irreverent. You've
branded me irreverent. In my mind you invented irreverent.

I feel drawn to the word "unmoored" during this time. I look it up a few times a week. I stare at the definition on my computer screen. I love the example sentence Wikipedia uses, which says, Left unmoored, the boat gradually drifts out to sea. It pops into my head when I wake in the mornings, while I walk the streets, wait for the bus, the train, get into cabs, eat lunch alone, and browse the shelves at the library.

I can accept that all I've ever wanted is not very special - all I've ever wanted, like most people, is proof of love.