Anne Bogel Quotes

To get the most accurate MBTI type for yourself, you need to identify the cognitive functions you rely on and the specific order you use them in. It's a surprise to many when they find out that this is in fact the whole point of the assessment. The end game isn't simply to label your preferences but to discover the mental processes that underpin your personality.

My personality traits don't determine my destiny, they inform it.

Understanding our personalities doesn't eliminate the tension that results when people with different needs, motivations, and preferences come together or, especially, live together. But understanding things beneath the surface–why people act the way they act and prefer the things they prefer–helps us at least make sense of what's going on. These people are not out to get us or trying to ruffle our feathers; they're just different–a different kind of normal.

People read for a multiplicity of reasons. Nearly forty years in, I can tell you why I inhale books like oxygen: I'm grateful for my one life, but I'd prefer to live a thousand --and my favorite books allow me to experience more on the page than I ever could in my actual life.

The frameworks in this book can highlight what upsets you (and why) and what makes you hum. They can help you understand what's causing friction in your relationships, and what to do about it. They can open your eyes to what's really going on in situations that currently make you batty.

The diagnosis is its own sort of cure.

In preference-speak, Judging means this type prefers to have decisions (aka judgments) behind them (settled). They feel more comfortable once the decision, whatever it is, is made. In preference-speak, Perceiving means "preferring to take in information." Perceivers prefer to postpone decisions in order to stay open to new information as long as possible.

With an experiment, there's no "do it right or do it again". Instead, it's "do it and see what happens".

Understanding our personalities makes it significantly easier to change the things within our grasp. This is whole point of studying various frameworks! Some people resist personality frameworks because they say such frameworks put them in a box. I've found that understanding my personality helps me step out of the box I'm trapped in. When I understand myself, I can get out of my own way.

Women have shown that they truly can do anything. But the statistics are strikingly different for women with children. When a woman has her first child, the wage gap between men and women opens. David Leonhardt of The Atlantic argues that the real problem in the workplace isn't sexism, it's momism, because women do great in the workplace until they have kids. Why? In a nutshell, when forced to choose between family and work, women choose family. And in the past, women were forced to make this choice.

When we share our favorite titles, we can't help but share ourselves as well. Shakespeare said the eyes are the windows to the soul, but we readers know one's bookshelves reveal just as much.

Sometimes I only pretend I don't know what to do, because I don't want to do it.

Being a responsible adult is the most underrated form of self-care. Yes I mean: live within your means, make dentist appointments, save money, plan meals, wash your face before bed, go for walks, cook for people, keep your house clean, go to bed at a decent hour, all that boring stuff. Routines make everything in your life better and this is absolutely the most overlooked and underestimated form of self-care." - Sarah Bessey

I've come to think understanding personality is like holding a good map. That map can't take you anywhere. It doesn't change your location; you're still right where you were before. But the map's purpose isn't to move you; it's to show you the lay of the land.

You're looking for a book that reminds you why you read in the first place. One written well and that will feel like it was written just for you - one that will make you think about things in a new way, or feel things you didn't expect a book to make you feel, or see things in a new light. A book you won't want to put down, whose characters you don't want to tell good-bye. A book you will close feeling satisfied and grateful, thinking, Now, that was a good one.

Once you understand yourself, you can stop fighting your natural tendencies and plan for them instead.

Sometimes I fantasize about getting my hands on my library records. . . my recurring bookworm dream is to peruse my personal library history like it's a historical document.

My bookshelves show me the books I've bought or been given. . . But my library books come into my house and go out again, leaving behind only memories and a jotted line in a journal (if I'm lucky). I long for a list that captures these ephemeral reads - all the books I've borrowed in a lifetime of reading, from last week's armful spanning back to when I was a seven-year-old kid with my first library card. I don't need many details - just the titles and dates would be fine - but oh, how I'd love to see them.

Those records preserve what my memory has not. I remember the highlights of my grade-school checkouts, but much is lost to time. How I'd love to see the complete list of what I chose to read in second grade, or sixth, or tenth.

Just as I'm all the ages I have been, I'm all the readers I have been.

Growth is a multistep process, but it is an actual process. Spiritual formation isn't quite as slippery as some make it out to be. The first step is to crack ourselves open to see what we're hiding, either deliberately or inadvertently, and to drag what is in the dark into the light. This is the process of self-discovery and self-awareness.

I'm an HSP to the core. I avoid violent imagery (I abandoned reading Elaine Aron's The Highly Sensitive Person on my first try because - in typical HSP fashion - I couldn't handle the frequent references to sexual abuse). I'm very empathetic, and I feel as though my head will explode when two people try to talk to me at the same time. I have difficulty making dinner while the counter is cluttered with the morning's dishes. I lose my mind when someone is singing while the radio is playing a different song. Watching the news makes me want to assume the fetal position and never get up.

You realize midsentence that you have no idea how to say a certain word out loud, because until now you've only said to yourself, in your head, while reading.

I was in college when I first saw You've Got Mail, and I loved Kathleen Kelly instantly. I was mostly past my wistful gade-school days of wishing myself into every novel I read, but I was alarmingly struck by how she echoed my old fear of settling for my real life, musing in one scene, "So much of what I see reminds me of something I read in a book, when shouldn't it be the other way around?"

Her impetus was this: once she'd read a story about a butterfly in a subway train, and then...she saw one! The film shows Kathleen rattling along on the train, an open book in her lap, when a butterfly suddenly flits into her field of vision. You can see her visceral delight. That thing she'd only read about had come true.

Yet she wondered if her experience was cheapened because she'd read it before she lived it, and my twenty-year-old self wondered right along with her. But I'm not the girl--or the reader--I was then, and I now know the times when reading cheapens anything are few and far between. I've seen how our on -the-page experiences set the stage for our actual lives. Our books frame the scenes for us so we can better understand and experience what's happening when it happens to us--

Compared to our personality traits, character traits are more malleable. Our personalities can only be managed (or tamed, some might say). Our characters can be shaped, although this isn't easy and happens slowly, with effort. Much of what we call character arises out of our core beliefs, and it's surprisingly difficult to change our beliefs.

With apologies to Kathleen Kelly, what I've come to learn is this: if my real life reminds me of something I read in a book , I'm reading well -- and I'm probably living well, too.

When I find myself in a dreaded reading slump, nothing boosts me out of it faster than revisiting an old favorite. Old books, like old friends, are good for the soul. But they're not just comfort reads. No, a good book is exciting to return to, because even though I've been there before, the landscape is always changing. I notice something new each time I read a great book. As Italo Calvino wrote, "A classic is a book that has never finished saying what it has to say." Great books keep surprising me with new things.