Stormbreaker Herod Sayle Quotes

Yuri Gagarin, the first man in space, may have had his charms, but he really couldn't be considered hip. ~ Alexei Sayle

The dissolute and unlawful king came: Herod! I saw him with my own eyes when he called me to Jericho to heal him. I took along my secret herbs - I knew all about such lore - and went. I went, and from that day on, I have not been able to eat meat, for I saw his putrescent flesh; I have not been able to drink wine, for I saw his blood filled with worms. I have retained his stench in my nostrils for over thirty years. ~ Nikos Kazantzakis

Herod was convert,after all. His mother was Arab. His people, the Idumeans, had come to Judaism only a generation or two earlier. ~ Reza Aslan

Unfortunately, like many people who are instinctively bad at something, the Archchancellor prided himself on how good at it he was. Ridcully was to management what King Herod was to the Bethlehem Playgroup Association. His mental approach to it could be visualized as a sort of business flowchart with, at the top, a circle entitled "Me, who does the telling" and, connected below it by a line, a large circle entitled "Everyone else. ~ Terry Pratchett

Madam, if I were Herod in the middle Of the massacre of the innocents, I'd pause
Just to consider the confusion of your imagery. ~ Christopher Fry

Israel is the Jimmy Saville of nation states, ~ Alexei Sayle

I have a lot of nice Italian winter clothes that make me look like a sophisticated Lebanese professor, so my friend Robert and I go around pretending to be experts in Arabic politics. It doesn't work in the summer though. I don't have the right clothes. ~ Alexei Sayle

Better to be always in a minority of one with God - branded as madman, incendiary, fanatic, heretic, infidel - frowned upon by "the powers that be," and mobbed by the populace - or consigned ignominiously to the gallows, like him whose "soul is marching on," though his "body lies mouldering in the grave," or burnt to ashes at the stake like Wickliffe, or nailed to the cross like him who "gave himself for the world," - in defence of the RIGHT, than like Herod, having the shouts of a multitude crying, "It is the voice of a god, and not of a man! ~ William Lloyd Garrison

For me, the showbiz memoir is uninteresting - you want to tell people something they don't know about. ~ Alexei Sayle

We have four blocks here. Block A, where we are now, is administration and recreation. Block B is software development. Block C is research and storage. Block D is where the main Stormbreaker assembly line is found." "Where's breakfast?" Alex asked. ~ Anthony Horowitz

It seems easier to make a career out of comedy now than it was in the 1980s. ~ Alexei Sayle

Dire Straits is a great band. Someone tells you they like 'Brothers in Arms' and immediately you know they're a stupid annoying git. ~ Alexei Sayle

Americans have different ways of saying things. They say 'elevator', we say 'lift' ... they say 'President', we say 'stupid psychopathic git. ~ Alexei Sayle

We often behave as though Jesus is only interested in saving and loving a romanticized version of ourselves, or an idealized version of our mess of a world, and so we offer to him a version of our best selves. With our Sunday school shoes on, we sing songs about kings and drummers at his birth, perhaps so we can escape the Herod in ourselves and in the world around us. But we've lost the plot if we use religion as the place where we escape from difficult realities instead of as the place where those difficult realities are given meaning. ~ Nadia Bolz-Weber

For our law has in it a turn of humour or touch of fancy which Nero and Herod never happened to think of; that of actually punishing homeless people for not sleeping at home. ~ G.K. Chesterton

I exist as an annexe of the BBC. I'm down the road a bit from the main building, in a little hut. ~ Alexei Sayle

Though all the Protestant denominations have historically condemned the veneration of holy objects (relics) and their use in healing, the Catholic church - until recently - preferred to depend entirely upon the magical qualities attributed to the possessions or actual physical parts of various saints and biblical characters for healing. The Vatican not only permitted but encouraged this practice, which entered history in the third century. Catholic churches and private collections still overflow with hundreds of thousands of items. Included are pieces of the True Cross (enough to build a few log cabins), bones of the children slain by King Herod, the toenails and bones of St. Peter, the bones of the Three Wise Kings and of St. Stephen (as well as his complete corpse, including another complete skeleton!), jars of the Virgin Mary's milk, the bones and several entire heads and pieces thereof that were allegedly once atop John the Baptist, 16 foreskins of Christ, Mary Magdalene's entire skeleton (with two right feet), scraps of bread and fish left over from feeding the 5,000, a crust of bread from the Last Supper, and a hair from Christ's beard - not to mention a few shrouds, including the one at Turin. ~ James Randi

Pete couldn't believe how sanctimonious somebody could be just because they'd once had a soldering iron stuck up their arse. ~ Alexei Sayle

Christ is the Master; the Scriptures are only the servant. The true way to test all the Books is to see whether they work the will of Christ or not. No Book which does not preach Christ can be apostolic, though Peter or Paul were its author. And no Book which does preach Christ can fail to be apostolic, although Judas, Ananias, Pilate, or Herod were its author. ~ Martin Luther

The optimum frequency with which comedians should do a series is every year. I do one every three years. My audience is literally dying off. ~ Alexei Sayle

I like the south of Spain, notably for the Moorish influence and the weather. ~ Alexei Sayle

Ah, Monsieur Priest, you love not the crudities of the true. Christ loved them. He seized a rod and cleared out the Temple. His scourge, full of lightnings, was a harsh speaker of truths. When he cried, 'Sinite parvulos,' he made no distinction between the little children. It would not have embarrassed him to bring together the Dauphin of Barabbas and the Dauphin of Herod. Innocence, Monsieur, is its own crown. Innocence has no need to be a highness. It is as august in rags as in fleurs de lys. ~ Victor Hugo

I don't think people were that interested in what I was doing for the most of the 1990s. ~ Alexei Sayle

I feel sorry for many politicians ... we expect them to be completely consistent and moralised when we're not. ~ Alexei Sayle

Either I'm right," he continued, "and he doesn't exist, or you're right, and he's the kind of God who watches children die. The kind of God who sits around while men like Herod build palaces and good people starve. Either way, he's not worth worshipping. ~ Seth Grahame-Smith

This is the band Radical Posture, and my name is Alexei Yuri Gagarin Siege of Stalingrad Glorious Five-Year Plan Sputnik Pravda Moscow Dynamo Back Four Balowski. Me Dad was a bit of a Communist, know what I mean? ~ Alexei Sayle

I'm fascinated by comedy. ~ Alexei Sayle

God did not choose Herod or Pontius Pilate or Caesar Augustus as His instrument. He chose the unknown son of an unknown carpenter in one of the least important stretches of the Roman Empire. ~ Dan Simmons

The journalists have obviously failed to capture my innate magnetism, humour and charisma, and they all need to be fired from their newspapers right away. ~ Alexei Sayle

A Strange Eastern Light "During the time of King Herod, Wise Men from the east came and asked, 'Where is the one who has been born king of the Jews? We saw his star when it rose and have come to worship him.'" - Matthew 2:1 ~ Seth Grahame-Smith

I did six series for the BBC and that was enough. I've been writing for ten years, which is more challenging artistically. ~ Alexei Sayle

Many a modern preacher is far less concerned with preaching Christ and Him crucified than he is with his popularity with his congregation. A want of intellectual backbone makes him straddle the ox of truth and the ass of nonsense. Bending the knee to the mob rather than God would probably make them scruple at ever playing the role of John the Baptist before a modern Herod. The acids of modernity are eating away the fossils of orthodoxy. ~ Fulton J. Sheen

Such laws, such foolish resistance, can cause short-term grief. Think again of Herod and the little boys he slaughtered. But think also about how ineffectual it was. Did he stop the morning star from rising? Did he stop the day from coming? In the same way, we must know that the message of Christmas is not that we have to persuade anybody of anything. The message is far more good news declaration than it is argumentation. ~ Douglas Wilson

But Herod had already murdered at least two of his sons as though they were enemies. Caesar had made a joke about it: Better Herod's pig than his son - meaning that Herod would kill his son, but being half Jew wouldn't touch a pig. ~ N.Lofts